Okay, first off...really long. Like Twenty-Seven pages long.

But anyway...it's sorda a filler/apology/make-up/Can I really trust you?/ What will happen if I do?/And...why the hell did you do all that to me?

Okay, we all know Tony's been a bad guy, okay a really bad guy, but, he's here to talk, for case related reasons. With some pushes, he and Ziva...talk, kinda, and she lets him in on a huge secret, involving the hospital, what she heard, and what she didn't hear.

Um...A lot of rants...I know...but anyway, this will probably be the last chapter for a few days, my fingers need a rest. Three chapters in one week! Espically this one! Really long :)

Disclaimer: As usual...I don't own anything you've all probably heard of...


The Rollercoaster of Life:

Frosty the snowman was a jolly happy soul,

With a corncob pipe and a button nose

And two eyes made out of coal…

"McGoogle, will you please turn that damn song off!" Tony shouted across the bullpen.

McGee smirked but killed the volume as he watched Abby hang ornaments on the office's Christmas tree.

It was almost two months since the car accident, and since nobody except Jenny, had heard anything from Ziva. The team didn't necessarily put it behind them; they just tried to put it towards the back of their minds, and move on, sorda.

They figured she'd come back when she was ready.

Hopefully, that was soon.

Not to say that nobody was pushing either person, sure, they wanted their teammates happy again, it seemed like it would never happen.

Sure, Tony put on a fake a chuckle or smile here and there, he wasn't the same top-movie-referencer-slash-top-person-to-get-the-most-Gibbs-slaps-person.

Nowadays, he barely got three.

They learned from Jenny that Ziva wasn't as bad as Tony, but she wasn't the same either.

Like Gibbs had said…nothing would ever be the same.

"We have a case." Gibbs shouted as he strolled into the bullpen. "We need to watch over a family for a few days, got a threat in the mail."

"Since when do we do that?" Tony asked.

Gibbs sent him a glare, "Since it was your job, DiNozzo."

"Well…who?" McGee asked.

Gibbs flipped open a file folder and read over a name, "Uh…the Deacon's. Uh, Hunter...but goes by Todd, Deacon. And his son, along with his wife, her sister, and their son. Security's bringin' up now."

"Well, what makes them so special?"

"Hunter Todd Deacon was involved in some…classified stuff in Afghanistan."

"What kind of classified?" McGee asked.

"Well when they get here why don't you ask the director, he's her friend."

McGee nodded, "Uh, sorry for asking boss."

"Right," he flipped open his cell phone, mumbled a few words, before hanging up again. "They're on their way up. Security said they should be arriving right about…now."

Just as he uttered the last word, the elevator doors slid open and three security guards stepped out before leading the family towards the conference room.

They didn't stop at the bullpen to introduce themselves, it wasn't necessary.

Hunter Deacon-McKenzie barely glanced up as they walked by, while both his wife and his sister-in-law parted their air so it hid their faces from that side of the room.

Jake held his mother's hand tightly as they walked by before his father picked him up and had him bury his head in his neck.

As soon as they were out of sight Tony walked quickly over to Gibbs.

"Boss, did you-"

"Nah, DiNozzo." He sighed. "No."


"This is a stupid idea." Hunter commented as he tapped the side of his Starbucks coffee cup.

They had been waiting for what it seemed to be an hour, an awkward hour.

"You keep saying that, it doesn't make it like we're actually gonna disappear." Eden replied.

"I'm telling you the FBI would have done just as good of a job."

"But the FBI would have made you paid for it." Gibbs said as he walked into the room.

He looked at Ziva before finally taking a seat at the head of the table.

"So, uh, wanna explain to me what's going on?"

Todd Deacon-McKenzie, spoke up, "It's classified Agent Gibbs…Your director will understand."

"We can't protect your family if we don't know what to expect."

Todd sighed, "About two decades ago, I was in the war."

"Which one?"

"Any, pick one. I was in nearly all of them." Todd said. "But, one was different from the other. It involved an Iraqi man and Al-Qaeda. One of their terrorists, I shot and killed, that's what I was told. I knew they may be after me some day, and then I got this," he pulled a piece of paper from his winter jacket and slid it over to Gibbs.

He unfolded it and frowned, there in the center was a family photo of Eden, Hunter, Todd, Jake, and Ziva. Though a big red X crossing them all out.

"Don't worry, Mr. Deacon, we'll make sure nothing happens to your family." He said as he handed the paper to a security personnel who then sealed it in an evidence bag.

"Promise?" Jake piped up.

Gibbs smiled and nodded, "Promise."

Jake eyed him curiously before looking at the personnel's hat, "Can I have that?"

Gibbs reached over and swiped it off the man's head, he handed it to Jake.

Jake grinned, "Promise accepted." He put it on before turning it backward.

"Jacob, don't do that." Todd scowled lightly.

"My name is Hunter Jake McKenzie. Not Hunter Jacob McKenzie. Daddy is Hunter Rhys. You're Hunter Todd. And, pwus, I don't like Jacob, grandpa. It reminds me of apples, I don't like apples." Jacob explained.

Eden smiled, "He's right."

Gibbs smiled once more before standing up he proceeded to walk out the door but stopped, "Ziver."

Ziva slowly looked up at him, "Director wants to see you…now."

Ziva stood up and walked out, but not before promising Jake she'd be back, before following him up to Jenny's office.

She knocked politely before Jenny's face appeared as she opened the door.

She smiled and welcomed her friend in; and as Gibbs prepared to stick his foot in Jenny shut the door.

She gestured to the couch in the corner of her room; she beckoned for Ziva to follow.

"Come, sit, sit." She said as she patted the seat next to her.

Ziva sat down quickly before Jenny rubbed her hands together, "So…"

"Yes?"

"How have you been?"

"Fine."

"Nothing new?"

"No."

"Nothing?"

"Nope."

Jenny smirked, "No…traveling or taking new classes?"

Ziva sighed, "We went to Disneyland for Jake's birthday."

"Oh, when was it?"

"November 26th."

"A few weeks after yours."

Ziva nodded, "Yes."

"Presents?"

"Clothes, a few pieces jewelry…" Ziva said, not though clearly focusing on the conversation.

"When you say clothes you mean…"

"Just clothes." Ziva shrugged

"Just you know…baby…clothes?"

"What?" Ziva asked quickly. "No. No. Why would I need baby clothes? I lost the babies remember? Eden would be the one-"

"Ziva, when you lie, you scrunch up your nose. Plus," she pointed to Ziva's jacket. "Doesn't work well to a detailed person's eyes, a person who worked for Gibbs, anyway."

Ziva licked her lips and sighed, "I left the hospital before they could do another ultrasound. But after I…passed the babies, I just wanted to make sure everything was, okay. So I made a doctor's appointment, but uh, I wasn't prepared for him to tell me I was still pregnant."

"So, let me get this straight, you were pregnant with triplets?"

"I suppose."

"Damn, Tony must have some super sperm."

Ziva frowned, "I don't know…"

Jenny lightly touched Ziva's hand, "Ziva…you gotta tell him."

"Jenny, I don't want to. I don't want to put my child through the pain of losing their father. Look at what happened the last time I told him."

Jenny sighed and nodded, "I know. And I understand why you may be feeling that way."

"So you won't tell him?"

Jenny nodded, "I swear. My lips are sealed."


"Mommy, I wanna play with my drum set." Jake moaned as Eden unlocked the door to their home.

"I heard you the first time Jake." Eden replied as she pushed open the door and let the four year old run inside.

"Daddy, come and play with me!" Jake shouted from a room in the back.

Hunter smiled, hung his coat up, and the followed the sound of drums to the back room.

"Here, let me take that for you Dad." Eden said as she reached for Todd's suitcase.

"No. No. Eden, you shouldn't even be lifting heavy stuff like this. You should be taking it easy." Todd said as he hoisted the suitcase up into his arms.

"Alright, I just don't want you to hurt yourself."

Todd chuckled, "Not that old." He kissed Eden's cheek before heading up the staircase into one of the guest bedrooms.

Ziva just stood around before Eden set her hands on her shoulders and escorted her over to the couch, "Sit." She commanded. Ziva didn't move, she smirked at her sister.

Eden pushed down on Ziva's shoulders, putting as much pressure as she could, until finally Ziva sat down and Eden fell forward, onto the couch.

"You're such a bitch." Eden muttered as she attempted to stand up.

Ziva stifled a laugh.

"Ziva, come on, it's not nice to not help a pregnant woman up." Eden complained.

Ziva laughed, "Hunter! Come help you wife!"

Hunter jogged into the living room before turning on his heels preparing to leave again, "Hunter." Eden warned.

"I'm sorry. I can't." Hunter said, his back still turned.

"Why?"

"Because I'll laugh my ass off." Hunter said between chuckles.

Eden glared at him, "Hunter Ryan, I swear if you don't help me up I'll cut your balls off so fast."

Hunter turned and looked at her, "Let's see, if I don't help you up, I still have my balls. If I do, I lose my balls. You see my dilemma."

"And Emersyn will never meet her father." Eden stated more like a hiss.

Ziva looked between the couple, a huge grin on her face, "Hunter, I'd do what she says. She once, took one of those little Ken Barbie dolls and did the same."

"Ken's don't have dink-dinks."

"She made her own."

Hunter walked over and extended his hand to his wife and pulled her up, "You were one messed up kid."

"Messed up, super genius, what's the difference?"

"Uh, Harvard or a Juvenile Delinquent Center…"

Eden rolled her eyes and rubbed her belly, "I'm hungry."

"You're always hungry."

"I'm always pregnant."

"No, I would have left by now if you were always pregnant."

"No comment…."

"Alright, we have leftover corned beef from last night, would you like me to make you a sandwich?"

Eden grinned, "Yes, please, Best Husband, ever."

Hunter rolled his eyes, "You say that now."

Eden brushed past him and started walking up the stairs, "Ziva, darling, come with me! Let's finish folding these cute little baby outfits!"

"Eden, I don't know…"

Eden frowned, "Ziva, you promised!"

Ziva sighed and stood herself up, "Fine. I'll be right there."

Eden smiled and continued up the stairs, and just as she was out of earshot, Ziva shook her head.

Hunter grinned, "You want one too?"

Ziva nodded, "Can I add some Vodka to that order?"


"Why are we here again?" Tony whispered as he and McGee checked the perimeter of the McKenzie residence.

"Because, Todd Deacon is a friend of SecNav and he wants the best of the best to work this case."

Tony straightened his tie, "Oh. Well then, I'll take that as a compliment."

McGee kicked some stray snow, "So…you talked to Ziva?"

Tony shook his head, "Nah."

"Why not?"

"What's there to talk about? She lost the baby Probie; she's probably found somebody else of something."

"Aplogize?"

"I already did. That got me thrown out on my ass."

"Well…maybe it's the way you did it. I mean, come on, what did she do to you?"

"Before or after she told me?"

"Either."

"Before…she…well….she…"

"Exactly."

"Well after all she did was call me and my girlfriend-"

"X-girlfriend."

"I never said we broke up."

"She hasn't called you lately."

"Doesn't mean anything."

"Yes it does."

"No it doesn't."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"Alright, enough! All I'm saying is that maybe it was for the best." Tony said as they started walking back toward the house.

"You don't really mean that do you?" McGee asked. "I mean, it still was you two's baby."

Tony shrugged, "I guess. I mean, can you imagine Ziva and me, as parents?"

McGee thought about it and then shrugged, "Yeah. With Ziva, I mean teaching the kid martial arts, and then you teaching them comedy or watching every movie known to man, or you anyway."

"Doesn't matter there's not a baby."

"Hey, do you boys want a sandwich? Hunter's makin'."

Tony and McGee looked up to see Todd Deacon standing out on the outdoor patio, holding one of the French doors open.

"Uh, no thanks." Tony called.

"Well, at least come inside for some hot cocoa." Todd offered.

"We really have to work, sir." McGee added.

"So put it in a to-go cup."

McGee looked at Tony, both shrugged, before running over and into the house to meet the friendly man.

Tony held his hands up to his mouth and blew air inside to warm himself up as Todd poured hot chocolate into two reusable Starbucks style cups, while Hunter added the finishing touches to two large sandwiches.

"Eden! Ziva! Jake! Food's ready." He called from the opening leading up to the stairs.

Hunter kept from making eye contact with Tony, but smiled at McGee, "My father makes the best hot chocolate, nobody knows exactly how he does it but he does."

McGee took a sip, and then nodded approvingly, "Yup. I totally agree."

"Agree on what?" Jake asked as he walked into the kitchen.

Hunter lifted him into his arm and onto his hip, "Grandpa's Hot Chocolate."

"Well, duh, it's like the bestest."

"Best. It's the best."

"I know, that's what I said." Jake emphasized as he cupped his father face with his tiny hands and shook it gingerly.

"Alright, what do you want for lunch?" Hunter asked.

"Chocolate Cake."

"You can't have chocolate cake for lunch."

"Why?"

"Because that's dessert."

"So?"

"It's lunchtime, not desserttime."

Jake hugged his father tightly and kissed his father's lips, "I love you daddy."

Hunter chuckled, "No buddy."

Jake kissed him again, "I love you very much."

"No."

"I love you super much."

"Nope."

Jake leaned in and whispered in his ear, "I love you more than mommy."

Hunter gave a dramatic sigh, "But mommy's the one with the boobs!"

"I know, right!" Jake exclaimed.

"Jake knows what?" Eden asked as she and Ziva appeared in the kitchen. "Don't tell me you told him where babies come from."

Hunter grinned, "No…"

"No…" Jake added with a shake of his head.

"Good." Eden sighed as she sat down.

"Boys comes the daddy's pee-pee, and girls come from the girls va-"

Hunter covered Jake's mouth, "I said never say that again." He hissed.

Jake grinned and attempted to speak through his hand, "Bubedbinpuwlic."

"What?" Ziva asked.

Jake pried his father's hand off, "You said in public."

Hunter rolled his eyes and plopped Jake in Eden's lap before returning to the counter.

"Is there mustard on that?" Eden asked.

"Yes."

"Cheese?"

Hunter nodded.

"Pickles."

"I apologize, dear, I forgot pickles, let me put pickles on it for you." Hunter said sincerely as he walked over to the refrigerator and pulled a jar.

"Ziva, you want pickles on this too?"

"Of course."

Jake giggled, Ziva looked at him, "What?"

"You don't put pickles on a sandwich."

"You put them on a Hamburger."

"Only White Castle Hamburgers."

Eden pursed her lips and titled her head adoringly at her husband, "Hunter…" she said in a sing-song voice.

"No." Hunter said firmly.

"Come on."

"No. I spent like ten minutes on this sandwich."

"And I spent like eight months carrying this baby. Which was like thirty-five pounds on my bladder."

"The baby does not weigh thirty-five pounds."

"I was talking about placenta, fluid, and belly all together." Eden smirked.

Hunter set the plates in front of the two women, along with three cups of hot chocolate.

"I'll make you a deal, cause I love you."

"I would hope." Eden murmured.

"White Castle for Dinner," he said before looking down at Jake, "And Frosty's for dessert."

Jake grinned before taking a small sip of hot chocolate, "I still like mommy more."

"Slushies' included." Hunter added.

Jake tapped his chin before picking up a carrot stick on his mother's plate, he chomped off a large piece before nodding, "Alright. Grow some boobs and we'll talk."

It took a whole gallon of willpower to keep from laughing, that included the elusive Gibbs who had been able to stay in the shadows of the kitchen while he watched the scene go down.

Ziva got up first, having only eaten half of her sandwich, in about an hour.

As she set her plate in the sink, she offered to take the drowsy Jake up to his room.

Eden agreed and they slowly passed the boy from one brunette to another before Ziva left upstairs, Gibbs following behind quietly.

He watched as she gingerly placed him in his big boy bed, and watched as her fingers lingered as she weaved her hands through his hair.

She stopped when she caught him looking at her through the corner of her eye.

She stood up and looked at him.

"Gibbs."

"Ziver," he said as he took a step closer. "How ya been?"

"Fine." Ziva stated as she moved over to Jake's dresser and began folding a pair of his underpants.

"So…is he always that…"

"Talkative? Hyper? Yes. Eden was like that when I was little, from what I remember." Ziva said quickly as she set the underwear in the drawer as her hand brushed against one of the new baby's pink onesie's.

Gibbs watched as she somewhat stared at the piece of clothing before removing her hand and looking at him.

He turned his head and looked at all the Superhero and Car posters hanging at odd angles on Jake's wall.

"He likes different." Ziva stated.

"You pregnant?"

Ziva simply looked at him, "Gibbs that is preposterous."

Gibbs turned and looked at her, "Don't lie to me, I know. I've had three X-wives, Ziver."

"None of whom you had children with."

"The children didn't make it."

Ziva's eyes fell, "I'm sor…"

Gibbs touched her hand which lay at her side, "Hey," She looked up at him, "You can tell me."

Ziva nodded, "I am…pregnant."

"Can I ask?"

"It is still Tony's baby. It turns out I was pregnant with triplets, as you know, two died in the crash, but the third," she smiled. "She is okay."

"It's a girl?"

Ziva nodded with a smile, "I found out three weeks ago."

"Ziver…"

"I didn't know, when I was in the hospital. I thought it was just two babies not three, Scott, said something but I wasn't really paying attention, I don't remember everything, I was still kind of in shock from what he told me, I was only partially listening…I have an appointment in two weeks…"

"You didn't look like you were pregnant with triplets."

Ziva shrugged, "I do not know everything about this…" she gestured to her stomach. "All I know, is that she is alive," Ziva smiled, "And she likes to kick at night."

Gibbs chuckled, "Sounds like Kelly, Shannon was always complaining about that."

Ziva smiled before looking over at Jake, watching his chest move up and down, "I know what you're thinking."

"And that is?"

"Well, two things. One, did I really give Jenny my resignation and…am I going to tell Tony."

"Alright, any answers?"

"To the first, yes, I gave it to her. Whether or not she filed it…I do not know. The second one…I just…just keep remembering what happened last time."

"Well, things are different now."

Ziva furrowed her eyebrows, "How?"

Gibbs kissed her cheek, "Ask him."


"Jake, come on! Or we'll leaving without you." Eden shouted as she prepared to lock the front door. Jake soon ran and crashed into his mother's legs, his blue hoodie in hand.

"Jake, it's cold outside you need a coat."

"Did I ever tell you how pretty you are mommy?" he asked innocently.

Eden rolled her eyes and grabbed a nearby coat before grabbing his hand and walking out the door.

It was only seven and it was already nearly pitch dark, yet nearly all the household decided to go pick up dinner. Tony volunteered to watch the house, much to Hunter and Eden's disapproval.

Tony watched as the Black Escalade slowly backed out of the drive way and started down the street before turning away and began exploring the house before stopping at the kitchen where Ziva was sitting at the kitchen bar, reading a thick book.

He hesitated to step in, "You may come into the kitchen." Ziva said, not bothering to look up.

"How'd you…"

"Mossad trains you for these things. That is why I always win at hide-and-seek."

"Didn't see you as the type of person who played hide-and-seek." Tony said as he stepped closer.

Ziva shrugged, "It's not like I play it twenty-four seven. I only play it when I am home."

"Where are you other times?"

"Trying to stalk me now?"

Tony took the seat next to her, "Course not."

Ziva looked at him before standing up and walking over to the cabinet, "Water?"

"Not poisoned is it?"

Ziva gave a fake smirk, "Yes I am wicked witch of the west, and I want to poison you."

"Well maybe if you dyed your hair…"

Ziva glared at him, "Do not push it."

"Sorry," he muttered.

She filled two glasses from the tap before pulling her chair on the opposite side in front of him and handing him his glass.

He took a sip and nodded, "Good water."

"Sure…So why did you not go with Eden and the others to pick up dinner? I'm sure you could have found something you liked. I mean house-sitting is not that exciting."

Tony shrugged, "They've got McPu-…Tim's going with them."

"Thank you for sparing Tim's name." Ziva murmured as she tapped her glass.

"Okay…no problem…" He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a small rectangular object with a large cap on top.

He screwed open the top, took a sip, and then held it out to her.

"Want any?"

Ziva shook her head, "No, thank you."

"Come on, it's not like it's hard liquor or anything."

Ziva shook her head again, "No. I just, do not want any."

Tony screwed the cap back on and slipped it back into his pocket, "The old Ziva wouldn't mind germs."

"People change." Ziva stated simply.

Tony nodded, "Yup, they sure do."

"Some more than others."

"Yeah."

"Mentally, Emotionally…"

"Physically." Tony added.

Ziva looked at him curiously, "I suppose."

"I mean like glasses, or a pimple. I mean, like you, your face is a little puffy."

"Gee, thanks."

"No, I mean, it's just an example. But I mean it's not like you can go out running or anything," he explained. "With all the snow." He added quickly.

"Eden has a gym."

"Geez, what doesn't this house have?"

Ziva smiled, "Emersyn, yet, anyway"

"Who?"

"Eden's baby."

"Oh…"

"She is due in two weeks, Christmas Eve, so we'll see how that works out."

"Yeah."

Ziva took another sip before tapping her fingers on the countertop.

"I…" Tony started.

"Jeanne and I broke up." He blurted.

Ziva raised her eyebrows, "Would you like my condolences?"

Tony sent her a look and she returned a deadlier one.

"You are the one who changed." She said as she stood up.

He looked at her as she walked over to the sink, "I changed?" he asked.

"Yes. So now that this is over what do you want from me?" Ziva said in a deathly tone.

"I never said I wanted anything." Tony defended.

"Good." Ziva stated as she nearly tossed her glass in the sink.

There was an awkward silence between the two before Ziva sighed and leaned against the sink. Her palms holding her weight.

She turned and looked at him, "I don't want to keep doing this…"

"Yeah, like I want to? We're supposed to be partners."

"Yeah, well, I depended on you and you let me fall to go and be with her. By the way, how was the baby making expedition?"

"I thought we were trying to get past this?"

"We are, I am just being-"

"Nosy?" Tony guessed.

"Curious. To if what you left me for was worth it." Ziva opposed.

"Whatever."

"Harder than it looks?" Ziva pursed.

Tony sighed, "Why are you so stubborn?"

"Why are you such an asshole?"

"What?"

"I was born stubborn; you just became an asshole over the past few months."

"It's not like I meant to…"

"But you still did. You could have told somebody-"

"It was a need-to-know basis."

"Has not stopped you before. You could be dating the president's daughter on the quiet-quiet and still the whole office would know by your damn reply all." Ziva said.

He shook his head and decided it was not a good time to correct her idiom, "Well…she's not really my type."

"Tony, for once, can you be serious? Life is not a joke."

"You don't like I know that Zee-vah?"

"Then why do you act like a child?"

"You just said I was acting like an asshole." Tony countered.

Ziva held up her hands, "I don't want to fight with you. I cannot keep doing this. It's killing us. I can't, Tony. Something's gotta-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa…"

"What?" Ziva asked.

"Us?" Tony asked.

"What are you talking about?"

"You said, 'It's killing us,'"

"So? I was talking about you and me."

Tony shook his head and stood up, he walked over to her quickly, he looked her in the eyes.

"No, that's not what you meant." He said as he made it over to her.

He seemed to dare himself to say the words…

"Are you still pregnant?"

Ziva looked at him, stone-faced, no indication on whether it was a lie or the truth.

"Ziva," he murmured, he slowly raised his hand to graze her cheek, she turned her head away. "Ziva, answer me." He asked lightly, barely trailing into begging territory.

She looked at the wall before blurry eyed at him, before she merely nodded.

"Yes."

Tony shook his head, "You lied to me. How can you yell at me for lying and you've been doing the exact same thing?" he shouted.

Ziva shook her head, "No, Tony. Listen, I was told I lost both babies. I wasn't told there were three. I found that out two weeks after the fact-"

"You still knew, for what? Six weeks?"

"I just kicked you out of my life, for what I thought was forever, I just lost two of my children. What did you want me to do? I was scared, I will admit, I'll admit it up to god. I did not know what to do, but the only thing I wanted her to have for Christmas is a father who will love her, no matter what."

"Her?"

"It's a girl."

Tony looked at the ground and gave the hint of a smile, "A little girl," he murmured. "Lock up your daughters, gentlemen." He chuckled before silence took over once more.

"Tony…" Ziva said.

Tony didn't say anything; he looked at the single tile on the floor, thinking of something he should have been thinking about since the beginning.

"Tony, I don't think we're ready for all this-"

"That why you're giving it up?" he asked suddenly looking up at her.

Ziva looked at him, clearly shocked, "I never thought of giving it up. I was just thinking we should try and figure things out, but where would you get that idea?"

"I overheard you an Eden talking at the doctors-"

Ziva sighed, "You were not paying attention to the whole conversation, my neighbor's dog had a litter of puppies so she asked me to help her find a good home for all them."

"Oh…"

"I was never sold on adoption when Scott mentioned it, what my options were. I did not want to get rid of it, or give it up. I was…torn. But while I was in the hospital, it frightened me about what could happen."

"Like what?"

"I had this dream…"

"About?" Tony questioned.

"Whether or not I could trust you or not."

"And?"

Ziva chewed on the inside of her lip, "No."

"You sure it was a dream?"

"Tony, you pointed a gun at me and then shot our daughter!" Ziva cried. "I don't know if that was a dream or the future!"

Tony coughed as he thought about what she just said, as if it sunk into his thick skull and into his brain, reality suck into his brain.

Tony swallowed hard before scratching his throat, "When you told me you were pregnant…I don't know. I thought Gibbs was making us go undercover again..."

Tony shook his head, "No. There's another lie. I'm turning into Paul Giamatti in Big Fat Liar-"

"Tony…" Ziva sighed clearly annoyed he could never take a conversation seriously.

"Right, sorry. I-I mean, a baby's a lot to spring on anybody. And it's like that was just added to my plate-"

"It's not like you have not gone back for fifths before."

"Can I finish?"

Ziva waved her hand, "Sure."

"Not to say it was your fault, cause it's not. None of it. I was being a jerk, an ass. I shouldn't have thrown it back in your face back at the office. Or in the car…I don't know. You didn't want me to be like your father, I didn't want to be like mine. But now that I think about it," he ran his hands through his hair, "I was worse than him. I mean sure, he wanted til after my mom was dead to start sleeping with other women, and he didn't lie about everything. Okay, he lied about a lot of things. But, at least he didn't force my mom to kill herself. And now…that you told me…it's a girl. If she ever found herself pregnant and then her boyfriend or whatever was acting and doing the same things I was doing-"

"He'd be dead by now."

"Hey…"

Ziva smiled sadly, "I'm just saying."

"It's true though. Sure my job pays for my apartment, my clothes, my car, heck everything. Still, there are like a millon other jobs that don't involve me lying to everybody. But, don't blame the director. I took the mission before she knew about us, heck, before I even knew there was an, us."

"You're not helping yourself."

"Ziva."

"How can you expect me not to speak, I've been holding this in for two months."

"Well, you could have called."

Ziva kicked her feet, "I shouldn't have to."

Tony sighed.

"Where does that leave us? Your girlfriend, or whatever she was, is supposedly gone. But what if she comes back eleven months down the road? Where does that leave me and the baby? You can't do that to us."

Tony nodded, "I know. I understand. But she's not coming back."

"How do you know?"

"Because, she found out. About everything. She said she wished she never met me. And to be honest, I don't really blame her."

"Neither do I."

Tony sent her a look, "Trying to apologize here."

"You're doing an OK job, so far, I suppose."

"Ziva, I don't know, what I can do to prove it to you-"

"How do I know I'm not just your back-up plan? You broke up with Jeanne, or she broke up with you, whatever, and you come back over here and apologize, out of the kindness of your heart or because you don't want to be the evil-spirited old man yelling at the children on the block to keep off his grass?"

"If you had asked me two weeks ago I would have said so I wouldn't be alone, I mean I'm nearly forty, and it's kinda scary. But now, I could be sixty and this same thing could happen, which it shouldn't, but I mean I shouldn't have hurt two, okay, three women just for my selfish insecurity issues."

"So you admit you have issues?"

"I'm not gonna go that far…"

"Oh so close…"

"Okay, now you're just teasing me."

Ziva shook her head, "No, just showing you how it feels to have something dangling in front of your face and just as you reach for it, it disappears."

Tony grabbed her hand, "I pissed you off, hell, I pissed off the whole office. I hurt you. I gave you that scar above your eyebrow. I made you lose our two babies. I help you make those three babies. I did a lot of stupid things that I'm willing to make up for. I've just been thinking about this for two freakin' months. It's been eating me alive, Ziva."

"Why should I feel bad for you now? When I am the who has been suffering?"

"What do you want me to do? Let you go out and do the same things I did, to show me how it feels?"

"Tony," Ziva said as she took back her hand. "I don't like this. I can't just forget everything that happened. I can't, I wish I could. I certainly wish a lot of this stuff didn't happen, But I can't. I can't trust you. You can say I can, but I'm not all that sure."

"I'll prove it to you."

"That'll take a lot of proving. Actions speak louder than words."

"I know. I know. But I'm willing to do it, anything. My actions, all the crap I did, it was stupid, but people say, in order to feel the person's pain you should walk in their shoes. I can't do that. I can't imagine doing that."

Ziva looked at him curiously, "You have been speaking with a therapist."

Tony opened and closed his mouth, "He's not really a therapist."

Ziva smiled, "Ducky."

"The one and only."

Ziva pursed her lips, "You have talked to Gibbs then?"

"Not directly, we talked, as in he yelled, I listened, in the hospital, otherwise it was all case related. Same with Jenny."

"Okay…" Ziva said hesitantly.

"What does that mean? Ok? What does that mean?"

"Your apology, has been…noted. If that was an apology…"

"What you want me to say? I'm sorry? Ziva I'm sorry for everything, for the mission, for lies, for assiness, for the crap I said, for making you lose the babies, for all the crap I just put you through, you and Eden, and Hunter, and Jake, which speaking of, you know I called here once and he called me a poody-head, but that's beside the point. I'm sorry. I know you're gonna say those are only words but…they aren't…they really aren't."

Ziva nodded, "What are they then?"

"Promises. Not empty ones either. Full ones that I plan to keep. I'll clean up my actions, too. I swear. I wanna prove it."

Ziva licked her lips before taking a calm breath, "I apologize also. I could have approached the situation better, I suppose."

"So…"

Ziva licked her lips, "You're still hanging on that hook, but you're not choking."

"Well, what do I have to do to make sure I don't hang myself?"

Ziva smirked, "You're on their pretty good."

"Ziva…"

"Alright, no lying."

"For both of us."

"Fine. No, assiness, as you like to call it. No pitching movie baby names-"

"Hey, some of those are pretty good-"

"Hook's getting tighter." Ziva whispered.

"Right, sorry, again."

"No complaining, get rid of all those movies that take up have of your guest room, um, you have to-"

"Whoa, whoa, back up, what?"

"What?" Ziva asked.

"I have to get rid of what?" Tony asked.

Ziva grinned, "Movies. Tony, come on, where would the baby sleep? I'm not saying we'd even be at your apartment, but still…"

"Can't she sleep in the bed with us?" Tony asked.

"Who says we'll be sleeping in the same bed?" Ziva asked.

"We're not sleeping in the same bed?"

"Of course not."

"Why not?"

"For one, I'm not necessarily saying that I completely trust you, and I have no idea where your solider has been, remember?"

"What do you want me to do?"

"Bleach, and trust, honesty, respect, loyalty, and alcohol."

"Ziva that's dangerous."

"Life is dangerous." Ziva stated.

"Back to giving up my movies…"

"Tony, they're getting to hoarder numbers."

"You're over exaggerating."

"I'm not compromising." Ziva replied.

"Three-thirds?"

Ziva simply looked at him.

"Fine, a forth."

"Deal." Ziva replied before she shrugged, "I would have settled for a half."

"Damn." Tony muttered.

Ziva laughed, "Damn indeed."

She stood up on her tippy toes and reached up on top of the cabinet. She pulled down a small rectangular, tape recorder.

"What's that doing up there?" Tony asked.

"Oh, Eden keeps it up there so she can listen in on Hunter's poker games. It just happened to be on…" she removed the tape and stuck it into her pocket. "While we were talking so now, if you do it again, which I strongly hope you won't, I have proof of your promises."

"You're not gonna file it with the courts are you?"

"Of course. I'm not an assassin anymore, I'm a mother."


"Come on Jake, bedtime." Hunter murmured as he lifted Jake up into his arms.

"Stay." Jake sleepily murmured.

"Nah, come on, it's almost midnight. And now that you've sugar crashed…"

"Sleep with you?" Jake asked.

Hunter nodded, "You can sleep with me buddy."

"Mommy stay here?"

Hunter looked over at his wife who was curled up in the large comfy chair, a yellow blanket balled up by her feet.

"Yes, mommy's tired, I wanna live to see tomorrow."

Jake sleepily giggled, "Mommy kill you if you wake her."

"Yeah," Hunter whispered. "Pregnant women like their sleep."

Jake rubbed his eyes, "I noticed."

"Alright, come on, let's get you in your pajamas."

Jake nodded and laid his head on Hunter's shoulders as they climbed up the stairs.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the room, Tony silently watched as his partner slept peacefully on the couch, quiet snores sometimes escaping.

"You two talk?"

Tony nodded, not bothering to turn around to talk to his boss, "We talked."

"She forgive you?"

"I'm not sure. She said I'm not choking myself on the hook."

Gibbs patted his shoulder, "Just take as a semi-acceptance, because I'm not even sure you deserve a full acceptance."

"How do I know when she accepts it?"

"You'll know."

"It's…"

"The rollercoaster of life DiNozzo. Sometimes it's bad, sometimes it's bad. Sometimes, you make it bad. Like eating a chili dog before the ride and wondering why you feel like crap afterwards. All you gotta do, is the man the hell up."

"Yeah, I know."

"She give you rules?"

Tony nodded.

"Well I'm gonna give you some too. You break her heart again, or more importantly, that little girl's heart and I won't just give you that cut. I blow your head off. Got it?"

Tony nodded, "Yeah."

"Two. I don't want you on anymore missions that need a need-to-know basis, I don't care who they come from."

"Okay."

"Three," he slapped the back of Tony's head. "That's for breaking rule twelve."

"Didn't you already give me one?"

"Yeah, but I can't hit Ziva." Gibbs said, Tony gave a small smile.

Just then McGee and another Agent from a different team walked quickly into the house, their hands balled up in four young men's jackets.

"Boss," McGee breathed. "Look what we found."

"What is it McGee?" Gibbs asked as he ushered them all into the kitchen.

"Tell him." The other agent hissed.

The shortest one, with red hair, spoke up timidly, "Look. We-we just trying to get into Sky Hawks. The guys, they said that you had do something that involved a federal agency. And well…we thought since we never heard of NC…NCDS that we could say we did it and not get in trouble with the cops."

"Sky Hawks?" Gibbs asked to no one in particular.

"It's a club at the local high school, boss." McGee said.

"Well, you see, we didn't think it get this far." Another boy started in.

Gibbs rolled his eyes, "Shut it…I don't wanna hear it." Gibbs said. "Take to the headquarters; we'll talk more about more there. McGee, you go get Mr. Deacon, I'll put these two in the car."

"What about me boss?" Tony asked.

Gibbs smirked and gave him a glint in the corner of his eye, before he and the other agent moved out.

Soon, McGee and Todd quickly ran down the stairs and into one of the cars as Gibbs, McGee, the other agent, and the boys drove to headquarters.

Tony sighed before coming to stand next to the couch, looking down at Ziva's sleeping face.

He slowly reached for the blue blanket that came over the couch and pulled it over her, stopping just below her stomach.

He sat down on the floor, right next to her stomach and tapped it lightly.

"Alright, missy. So I know, that you've heard what's gone and I know you've noticed it's a lot roomier in there, cause your siblings are gone but…I you know…I kinda made amends with your mother, and your aunt, and uncle, and cousin. And a whole bunch of other people that you have to see to explain. But anyway…Mom's been upset, making you upset, cause dad's acting like an ass, sorry, butt. And I know Gibbs has a rule about this but I'm sure he'll make an exception, he always makes exceptions for cute kids, which of course you'll be one but, back to the main point. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the yelling, and the fighting, and the car accident which a lot of people are telling me it's not my fault, like Ducky, sometimes, but I think it kinda is. I mean I was making fun of your mom, and I shouldn't have been, and that's how we lost your brothers or sisters. And the Jeanne problem, I know, was stupid, I know. I, uh, wish I could go back and change some things, but this isn't Austin Powers in Goldmember. So…to make it up, besides apologizing, and never doing it again. I promise to buy your first tiara, if you're into that kind of thing or help Gibbs build you a tree house, and your first bike, and," he lowered his voice to a whisper, "Don't tell mommy this, but, your first James Bond movie."

He stopped and smiled as he felt his daughter move under his touch.

Ziva stirred before resting her head back on her pillow, "I told you she likes to kick me when I'm asleep."

Tony smiled, "And I promise I won't shoot your boyfriend unless it's necessary. And like ninety-nine percent of the time. It is."


So, she hasn't really ninety-nine percently forgiven him but it's a start, a small start. And, now we know it wasn't just one, or two babies, it was three! Yes, I know, but this is kinda sorda fiction people, and I'm trying to make it as realisitic as possible, but how can I write a TIVA story about the consequences of breaking rule 12 and there's not a baby?

*Insert Evil Grin Here*

Anywoo, he's making much needed apologies, and explaining his feelings. And she's letting him in on, can she really trust him, her dream in the hospital, and other troubling thoughts.

Jeanne's gone too!

Yeah, well, she had to go. And that's all I'll say about it...for now.

Oh yeah! And the baby's a girl! Even though Ziva really wanted a boy, can you imagine all the pink stuff Abby'll buy, or even a pink Bert, like...Berta! Yeah, I just thought about it.

And the Gibbs had a lot of father/daughter/son moments, in this chapter.

And some Eden/Hunter/Jake/and Baby Emersyn storylines.

But, back to apologies, I don't want Ziva to just throw herself at Tony, and say, 'Oh Tony! I'm so glad you've gone to yuor senses!'

No.

Ziva's a tough chick, and she's not gonna let anybody walk over her like that, so Tony's gonna have to prove himself obviously. And I might add as a last note, you will see a familar face from Season 8, (not saying I'm jump starting 4 seasons, here. We're still in Season 4.)

I'll even give you all a hint, Permanent.

Anyway, until the next time my fair readers...

Broken Piece of The Puzzle

Reviews would make me and my day very happy!