Chat Noir had a long, horrible, day what with Marinette being attacked at work, then the twins barely looking at him at lunch, before he had to go back to work an endure a day of horrible paperwork and then a long, tedious, patrol in the cold night.

All he wanted to do was go home, crawl into bed, and hopefully have a long, dreamless, sleep.

But of course his bad day couldn't simply just end on the dull, anticlimactic, note. Oh no it had to get worse because his luck was just horrendous.

Chat Noir barely landed in the garden when the sprinklers went off.

"What the hell?!" he spluttered as he staged back to avoid the water. It sprayed in his face and he grimaced as eh covered it. "Blergh!" his cat instincts were desperate to avoid it.

He then had the bad luck to accidentally stand on a random rake that was, for reasons unknown, left abandoned in the garden when the wooden handle smacked him right in the face. He let out a yelp of pain as he then staggered back into one of the trees when suddenly a net full of leaves suddenly fell over his head.

Blindly, Chat swatted at the leaves and net as he staggered through the garden towards the back door. He had just managed to get the net off of him when suddenly he was flung off of his feet and shot up in the air.

Chat Noir swayed and spun madly in mid-air as he found himself suspended upside-down by his ankle.

"WHAT THE HELL?!" he yelled as he just to claw at the roped tied round his ankle. He missed and swung back and forth in front of the back door and he struggled for freedom. "HELP!" he shouted. "MARINETTE! HELP!"

"Chat are you trying to wake up the child- oh my God!" Marinette's irritation gave way instantly for horror as she took in the sight of her husband swinging round the back door upside-down. "Stay still!" she ordered as she grabbed hold onto his sides to steady him. "Let me see if I can untie you. Kitty, what happened?"

"I don't know!" Chat whined. "I came home like normal and then suddenly the sprinklers went off and there was a rake and leaves and now I'm hanging upside down!"

"A rake?!"

"The gardener must have let it out," Chat mumbled, "it stepped on the bottom bit and the handle smacked me in the face."

"Oh Kitty," Marinette murmured softly, "here," she pressed a light kiss on his nose, "better now?"

Chat nodded and was on the verge of speaking again – in hopes of wheedling a couple more kisses he was a little less distressed now Marinette was here to his rescue – when the kitchen lights suddenly switched on.

"AHA!" Emma bellowed furiously. "CAUGHT IN THE ACT!"

Emma stood there with her arms crossed defiantly as her green eyes blazed furiously and a scowl marred her face. Hugo stood a couple inches behind her with a disapproving expression on his face that gave Chat a couple flashbacks to his father.

"Emma Sabine Agreste!" Marinette hissed furiously. "Hugo Thomas Agreste! What is the meaning of this?!"

"Shouldn't we be asking you that?" Hugo said coldly. "What are you doing?!"

"Don't take that tone with me, young man," Marinette replied sternly, "I'm helping Chat Noir down. You want to explain why he's hanging upside-down/"

"Want to explain why you've been kissing him?!" Emma shot back. "You're married. To Daddy, remember?"

Marinette froze as her eyes widened in realisation. For a brief moment her beautiful, startled, blue eyes met his and then she slumped in defeat. "Goddamnit!" she cursed. "Now I owe Alya a box of macarons!"

Whatever response the twins had been expecting – whether it outright denial or pleading to not tell…well him – this was obviously not it, and they looked horrified at that. "Don't you care?" Emma whispered and it pained Chat to see tears well up in her big, green, eyes. "Don't you care at all about Dad?"

Marinette looked as if she had just been stabbed in the heart. "Oh Ki – sweetie," she corrected herself. "Of course I care about Dad. Dad is the love of my life."

"Then why?!" Hugo burst out. "Why are you kissing Chat Noir?!"

Marinette held her arms out to the children. They stood firmly with stubborn looks on their faces as they refused to move an inch but Marinette managed to sneak in and coax either twin under her arm. Her hands were pressed against the children's foreheads as she held them close and she glanced questioningly at him.

He nodded.

"What are you-?"

"Watch," Marinette murmured soothingly, "just watch Chat Noir."

And with that, Chat Noir dropped his transformation.

MLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLB

There was a bright green flash that almost blinded them and suddenly Chat Noir was replaced….

….with Dad.

"DADDY?!" Emma and Hugo shouted in unison. "You're Chat Noir?!" Emma added unnecessarily as her jaw dropped open.

Hugo didn't blame her for the shock. He was surprised too but then when he thought about it Char Noir was very fond of calling Mum 'Princess' and that was a favourite for Dad too. And whenever Dad was out working late, Chat Noir showed up, and Dad tended to turn up a little too quickly for him not to have seen Mum and Chat Noir together. And when Hugo really thought about it, Dad had been limping after Emma had kicked Chat Noir….oh dear God they were idiots!

"I don't believe it!" Emma wailed. "I kicked Dad!"

"Forget that!" Hugo cried out. "We've just strung Dad up in front of the back door!"

"Yes," Dad agreed as he swayed from side to side, "about that… erm, I don't suppose you'll get me down now?" he asked hesitatingly.

Hugo and Emma glanced at each other worryingly. It never occurred them about how to get Chat Noir down. They had decided they were going to trap him no matter what. They never really thought about what to do when they had him.

Mum sighed heavily before she let go of the twins and strolled towards the kitchen counter. She picked up a big, shiny, knife that made Hugo, Emma, and Dad all gulp in unison before she slashed the rope in half and Dad landed on the floor with a thump.

"Better Kitty?" she asked sweetly.

"The view," Dad said in a strange voice that always proceeded something disgustingly romantic, "has improved vastly from where I'm sitting."

Mum flushed bright pink at that as she shoved her hand in Dad's face. Dad smirked in reply as he accepted it and Mum hauled him back onto his feet.

Emma frowned at Hugo questioningly and Hugo shrugged in reply. He didn't get it either.

Grown-ups are weird.

"But…but…but…" Emma stammered. "When you came into the house as Chat Noir you said when the husband's away, the cat comes out to play!" Emma mimicked Chat Noir's arrogant flirty tone so perfectly that Dad instantly flushed bright red in embarrassment. Mum didn't look much better either. "Why would you say that if you're the husband?!"

Mum suddenly choked while Dad shifted sheepishly. "Ah…erm…you see…" Dad said slowly as he scratched the back of his head. "When you're a lot older-"

"-A great deal older," Mum added hastily.

"Like thirty-"

"- or forty!"

"Forty would be better," Dad agreed cheerfully. "You'll…well…you'll find out adults like to play pretend too."

Emma and Hugo exchanged bewildered stares and then shrugged in unison. Grown-ups were really weird.

Like really, really, weird.

"All right then," Emma said, thankfully deciding to drop the whole play pretend thing because Hugo really didn't want to know, as she turned her piercing gaze onto Mum. "Then what is that you're keeping secret for the last three months?!" she demanded to know. "I heard you talk to Aunt Alya and she said you got to tell Dad!"

Mum spluttered indignantly at that. "Emma Sabine Agreste what have I told you about eavesdropping?!" she cried out.

"..To do so?" Emma suggested with such fake innocence that it was nothing but sheer cheek. Mum raised an unimpressed eyebrow as she crossed her arms nonsensically and Emma deflated immediately. "I'm sorry Mummy," Emma mumbled, "but I thought you were having an affair!"

Mum pinched the bridge of her nose as if she was fighting back an oncoming headache. "I'll let it go," she sighed. "…this time," she tacked on when Emma suddenly brightened up. "All right we were going to tell you this soon anyway but since we're here now and you're worried about it, we might as well tell you now."

Mum turned to look up adoringly at Dad who returned her faze with something equally mushy and gushy as he reached out and slid his hand into hers.

"We're having another baby!" Dad beamed.

Emma's eyes lit up at that. "A brother or a sister?" she asked.

"We don't know yet," Mum replied.

Hugo personally hoped it was a brother. He had plenty of his sisters as it was but instead of voicing this or asking more questions (perhaps this time he and Emma can get a real answer on the whole baby-making thing because Mum and Dad were never really clear about that and Hugo was sceptical that involved just kissing like Emma seemed to believe) about it, Hugo's eyes caught had sight of something really weird earlier which he ignored in favour of answers but now it was beginning to bother him.

"Can I ask something?" he said politely.

"Of course sweetie," Mum smiled, "what is it?"

"Why is there a flying black cat eating cheese in our kitchen?"

Mum blinked, Dad rolled his eyes, and Emma whirled round to look at the small, flying, black cat that was lazily hovering mid-air with a huge wheel of camembert (at least now Hugo knew why that particular cheese was off limits….and why Dad smells like cheese when he thinks about it).

"Finally noticed me, huh?" the black cat drawled out lazily. "I'm Plagg, God of destruction and bad luck." He held out a sticky paw, Hugo shook it and grimaced at the feel of camembert against his skin. Emma, however, appeared entirely indifferent as she shook Plagg's paw firmly with big, wide, fascinated eyes. "I'd like to say you two kids have grown up well but to be honest I don't see much difference from the two drooling babies that used to grab my tail. You're just as oblivious as you were back then."

"Plagg!" Hugo jumped a mile when a small red creature zoomed out from beneath Mum's blouse collar. Unlike Plagg, this creature wasn't as identifiable to a normal animal. She was very pretty with the biggest eyes Hugo had ever seen. She glowered chidingly at Plagg who seemed entirely unbothered as he munched on his cheese. "Don't listen to him," the red creature murmured as she flew up to Hugo and Emma. "He adores you two really," she said reassuringly as she nuzzled against Hugo's cheek. She was soft and gentle and smelt like cookies and Hugo suddenly felt all warm and tingly like he did when Mum hugged him. "All he did was coo over you when you were babies. He was practically begging you to pull his tail"

"Tiki!" Plagg yelped.

Emma stared at Tiki with her mouth dropped open in the perfect 'O' of surprise. Hugo probably looked no better as he couldn't understand why there was suddenly magical creatures in his kitchen. "Who are you?!" Emma asked rudely. "What are you?"

"I'm Tiki," Tiki replied simply, "the God of creation and good luck."

"The yin to my yang, the light to my dark," Plagg added in bored time, "the usual rubbish."

Yes but that didn't explain why Tiki was here in the Agreste mansion, in their kitchen, talking to them, knowing them like Plagg apparently knew them….

"Tiki is my kwami," Mum spoke up shyly. She bit her lip and twiddled her fingers nervously as she suddenly avoided all eye contact. "….she makes me Ladybug," Mum forced the words out in a squeak.

Hugo's mind went blank at that.

It was one thing to find out that your Dad is a superhero but it was another thing entirely to find out that your Mum is the even more kickass superhero. There was so many questions and not even brain function to form them….where…why…how…what?

"But you said you were out of town!" the words slipped out before Hugo could even think about them. "We asked you for help to deal with….well, Dad," he shot an apologetic look at Dad. He can't believe he called his father lewd. "And Aunt Alya said that you said you were out of town!"

Mum's jaw drooped open. "That was you?!" she cried out. Hugo and Emma nodded furiously and Mum shook her head in reply. "Unbelievable," she muttered, "well as you know I am pregnant with your new baby brother or sister," she explained calmly, "and when I'm pregnant Tiki won't transform me."

"Pregnant women shouldn't be on the battlefield," Tiki said when Emma and Hugo turned to look at her questioningly, "and even if I didn't have a problem with pregnant women fighting you don't want to know what kwami magic could do to an unborn child."

Hugo could feel Emma's curiosity buzz at that as she immediately opened her mouth to ask anyway when Mum suddenly spoke over her with a question of her own.

"Where on earth did you get the word lewd from?!"

"I looked it up," Hugo shrugged. "I didn't want anyone to realise a seven year old wrote the email."

Mum stared at Hugo as if he had suddenly grown a second head before she whipped round and narrowed her eyes at Dad. "Your children," Mum muttered to Dad, "they're your children through and through."

"Trust me Princess," Dad smirked, "with that trap they're definitely more yours than mine."

Hugo didn't know whether or not to be insulted about that.

"So…erm…we're not in trouble are we?" Emma asked nervously as she flushed bright pink at the reminder of the trap. "For, you know," she bit her lip, "trapping Dad?"

Mum and Dad looked at one another and for the billionth time in his very short life, Hugo was convinced the whole being able to speak with stares wasn't just a twin thing. Dad tilted his head slightly in a questioning manner and Mum raised a dry eyebrow in reply and then after some more staring into each other's eyes, Dad finally dragged himself away.

"No," he said quietly but firmly, "It's our fault that you thought you had to do this. We kept secrets from you and because of that you thought you were going to lose your mother to another man," he smiled sheepishly at that as he scratched the back his neck, "You were only trying to protect the family from breaking up. We can't fault you for that."

"So no punishment," Mum said loudly. Emma sighed and physically slumped in relief and Hugo felt the tension in his shoulders suddenly ease and a weight in his chest suddenly disappear. He had been ready to accept whatever punishment that was metered out (unlike Emma who would have looked for the quickest escape route) but he couldn't help but pleased there wasn't going to be any. "Though," his Mum continued, "I got to know…How did you get the rope all set up?"

"Oh!" Emma said brightly as she ignored Hugo's frantic head-shaking. "That's easy! We used the garden ladder."

"That heavy old thing?!" Mum gasped.

Emma nodded with a pleased look. "It was a nightmare to drag out of the shed, and set up, and then drag it back to the shed, but we did it!"

"And you climbed up that high?" Mum asked worriedly. "You could have fallen!"

"It wobbled a lot but I wasn't scared!" Emma bragged and Hugo inwardly groaned as he covered his face with a hand. "I had Hugo behind me to keep me safe."

"I see," Mum murmured "…grounded," Mum declared. "For two weeks. Both of you."

"WHAT?!" Emma yelled, utterly stunned. "But you just said we wouldn't be in trouble!"

"For trapping Dad," Mum agreed, "but I'm not grounding you for trapping Dad, or for kicking him or for eavesdropping." Emma looked extremely sheepish at that. If it wasn't for the fact that Mum and Dad felt it was their fault that Emma had been so upset these last couple weeks she certainly would have been grounded for all of those things. "I'm grounding you for endangering your life to make the trap. Two totally different things."

"So unfair!" Emma pouted.

And so typical of Mum to outwit them like that. "Life is unfair," Mum said, "now it's late and well past your bedtime." She turned to Dad. "Divide and conquer?"

"Excellent idea, My Lady," Dad nodded and instantly scooped Emma in his arms. Emma squealed and squirmed but it was just for show as she wrapped her arms round Dad and snuggled into his shoulder. "I'll take little Miss Trouble here."

"I'm not trouble!" Emma protested. "And I don't want to sleep yet! I still have questions."

"Tomorrow," Mum promised as she smoothed Emma's hair away from her face and pressed a kiss on her forehead. "We'll talk tomorrow and you can ask anything you want," she said reassuringly, "but first you should sleep. Goodnight K-sweetie."

"Kitten," Emma mumbled, "I'm still your Kitten….right?" she asked hesitatingly.

Mum smiled radiantly as she pressed another kiss on Emma's forehead. "You're always going to be m Kitten," she said firmly, "now good night."

"Night Mummy!"

Dad then carried Emma out of the kitchen which left Hugo and Mum alone in the kitchen. There is a moment of awkward silence as Hugo bit back the urge to ask if he was still Mum's kitten.

(After all he was seven and a boy, he shouldn't want to be his Mum's kitten.)

As if she read his mind, Mum held her arms out for him. "You're still my Kitten too, you know," she said softly as she ran her fingers through his hair. "Now come on, Kitten," she nudged him slightly, "time for bed."

Hugo leaned into Mum and allowed her to guide him back up the stairs and to his bedroom. Mum pulled the duvet down on Hugo's bed and Hugo clambered in and let her tuck him in as if he was a little baby all over again.

"You're going to be okay, Kitten?" Mum murmured.

"I'll be fine," Hugo blinked, "Why?"

"Just….if you're upset or mad about the secrets," Mum said anxiously, "we'll understand baby. It's okay to be mad."

"I'm not mad," Hugo said reassuringly, "and Emma will be fine too. I understand why you'd want to keep it a secret. Emma's a bit of a blabber mouth." Mum's lips twitched in amusement. "I'm just happy to know you're not leaving anytime soon."

"Trust me, Kitten," Mum smiled softly as she smoothed Hugo's hair over, "I'm never going to leave you or your sisters or your Dad. Never"

Hugo's pillow suddenly felt really comfortable, and he suddenly very warm and cosy, and his eyes suddenly felt very heavy as they fluttered to a close. "Good," Hugo mumbled sleepily. Mum was still stroking his hair and it felt very soothing and was making his eyes feel heavier and heavier as the room went darker and darker. "Mum?"

"Yes, sweetie?"

"Could the baby be a brother?" he asked. "Little sisters are more trouble than they're worth."

He didn't hear Mum's reply as he fell asleep almost immediately but he was rather certain she laughed.

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"I'm sorry."

Emma waited for the total of two seconds after they left the kitchen before the first apology left her lips. Dad tightened his arms round her as she buried her face as close to his shoulder as she could.

"It's okay," Dad murmured as he rubbed soothing circles on the back of her shoulder, "Little Lady."

Emma sighed in relief at that. She had feared she lost Little Lady like she had almost lost Kitten. She wasn't grown up enough yet to be without her parents' pet names. "But I am!" she insisted firmly. "I'm sorry for being so mean to you!"

"You didn't know-"

"And I'm sorry that I made a noose for my Chat Noir doll with ones of your ties!" Emma burst out. Now she had started she suddenly found it impossible to stop. "And I'm sorry I stole on of your ties!"

"It wasn't a tie I liked," Dad said cheerfully, "and I'm just glad you didn't decide to make a noose for the real Chat Noir when you made your trap."

Emma grimaced at that. She couldn't deny that Chat Noir's bloody death had crossed her mind multiple times in these last couple weeks. "I'm sorry for drawing horrible pictures about you," she mumbled against his shoulder.

Dad was silent for a moment as he squeezed Emma tightly. "We'll discuss that one tomorrow," he said in a more neutral tone of voice, "Don't be surprised if Mum bans you from TV for all eternity," he tried to tease but it came out weak and Emma felt even more miserable than before.

She hated hurting her Dad, speaking of which…

"I'm sorry for kicking you!"

"That's all right, sweetheart." Dad murmured. "I shouldn't have ambushed you like that."

"I'm sorry for calling you a rat," Emma added. "….and for teaching Dottie to call you a rat too!"

Dad paused for a moment and for a second Emma regretted hiding her face into his shoulder because she really couldn't tell what her Dad was thinking. Whether he was ready to forgive her or if he hated her forever for that one. Then suddenly Dad started moving again. "That's okay," he said softly.

"I'm sorry for trapping you."

"You were just trying to protect me and your mother from….well, me."

"I'm sorry for thinking you're a sleazy love rat flirt in a cheap leather suit!" Emma burst out with her final sin. Dad's shoulders started to shake beneath Emma's cheek, and a first she thought that he was having a fit or something, but when she looked up she realised that Dad was trying his best to smother his laughter. "Why are you laughing at me?!" she cried out indignantly.

Dad chuckled out loud at that which did nothing to improve Emma's sour mood. "Sorry, sorry," Dad choked out between giggles, "adult humour."

Emma didn't get it.

She decided to file this bit of weirdness with the whole grown-ups playing pretend thing….aka the Must Ask Aunt Chloe Later file.

"Adults are so weird," she said.

"Indeed we are," Dad agreed cheerfully as he shifted Emma in his arms so he was only holding her with one as he used the other to open her bedroom door. "Emma, I accept all of your apologies and I forgive you for everything," Dad said in his most serious and sincere tone. He met her green eyes with his matching, solemn, eyes. "Okay?" he prodded gently and Emma nodded in response though she very much wanted to cry now because it felt so good that he wasn't mad at her and that Mum wasn't running away anytime soon and that there's no more horrible heavy things weighing on her mind. Emma could cry for France now she was so relieved. "So don't worry. What about you Little Lady?" Dad asked as he pulled Emma's duvet down and dropped Emma gently down onto her soft bed. "Will you forgive me?"

Emma blinked, bewildered. "What for?" she asked. "I was the naughty one not you."

"Oh no I've been naughty too," Dad said as he sat down beside Emma on her bed. "I'm sorry Emma, for the lies and the secrets, for scaring you and making you think the worst, and for being out late and not around much. I'm sorry for being a terrible father."

"What are you talking about?!" Emma cried out crossly. "You're always around! And you're the best Daddy in the world! I love you!"

Dad beamed at that and his eyes sparkled with a joy that would take anyone's breath away. "I love you too," he replied as he wrapped his arm round Emma.

"And the secrets?" Emma carried on. "What else were you supposed to do? Superheroes don't exactly put out adverts to tell people who they are. And telling a really little kid that doesn't know how to keep a secret is a really stupid idea. I mean Dottie just says anything like when she called you a ra…" Emma trailed off as her eyes widened in realisation. Emma called Chat Noir a rat and taught Dottie to refer to Chat Noir as a rat and when Emma and Hugo openly talked about trapping Chat Noir, Dottie thought they were trapping Dad which would mean... "Dottie knows," Emma concluded. "Doesn't she?" she shot accusing glare at Dad.

"You used to as well," Dad said mildly, unbothered by Emma's scowl. "Babies don't talk, there was no need to hide. I would change your nappy transformed if you were crying just as I got home from patrol….much to Plagg's everlasting displeasure."

Something told Emma that Plagg was always displeased and dissatisfied about something.

"And then?"

"You went to pre-school and was proud to tell everyone your Dad was Chat Noir and Mummy was Ladybug," Emma cringed at that. So it was her fault that Mum and Dad started lying to her. "No one believed you, thankfully," Dad added hastily, "but that was when we started to keep it secret and you….well forgot."

"How can I forget something like that?!" Emma asked disbelievingly. "Plagg and Tiki aren't exactly forgettable."

"You'd be surprised how much you have forgotten," Dad smiled, "so many games and imaginary friends and little habits that you've just simply outgrown."

"Are you going to let Dottie forget?" Emma asked. "Are we going to have to keep this from her and the baby when they come along?"

"Probably for the best," Dad said gently, "but I can promise you this that we will not let them find out like you did. We were going to sit you down and tell you when you're old enough to keep it a secret. We'll do the same for Dottie and baby and before they see Mummy kiss Chat Noir." Dad smiled then. "Cat's honour," he promised.

Emma wanted to argue (because somehow she didn't think it would be that easy when the time came) but she was so tired now that she could sleep for a hundred years and it still wouldn't be enough. She opened her mouth but nothing but a huge yawn came out. Dad laughed again as he gently guided Emma to lie down and tucked her in. once she was firmly under the covers and been kissed good night, repeatedly, Dad got up to leave.

"Wait!" Emma sat up abruptly. Dad paused and stared at her questioningly. "Can I tell you a secret?" Emma whispered excitedly.

"You can tell me anything Little Lady."

Emma gestured for Dad to move closer and he did. He even went as far as to lean in close as she shifted onto her knees to whisper into his ear. "My Daddy is the greatest superhero in the whole world," she whispered.

Dad pulled away with a look in his eyes, like he wanted to laugh but cry at the same time, as he smiled down at her. "Even greater than Ladybug?" Dad teased.

"Well Ladybug said so herself," Emma said primly, "Chat Noir is her hero."

The grin on Dad's face was more radiant than the sun.

MLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLB

Adrien and Marinette had pretty much collapsed onto the bed without a second thought. Plagg and Tiki were already asleep so it was virtually just the two of them which left the room silent and peaceful as Marinette snuggled in close to her husband. She was so exhausted that she could lay like this for all eternity especially when she was covered in, well, Adrien.

The best thing to be covered in.

Adrien murmured something lovingly against her hair and Marinette smiled as her eyes fluttered to a close. "I think we're going to be all right," Marinette finally managed to voice through her tiredness. "There's still so much to talk about but I think it's going to be okay."

"Me too," Adrien mumbled, "Remember, you now owe Alya macarons."

"I know," Marinette groaned into her pillow, "she's going to be so smug about it as well. But hey, we can have a day of baking with the children after the talk."

"That would be nice."

"You're staying away from the oven."

"As long as I get to lick the spoon," Adrien moaned dreamily.

Marinette rolled her eyes. She swears to God that Adrien was the biggest child in the world. "You can fight the twins for the spoon," she said. Adrien groaned in protest as he pulled her closer and made a childish whine. "Hush," she murmured, "at least it's all over now."

"Agreed," Adrien muttered, "But as the good bard has always said all's well that ends well."

Marinette groaned disgustedly. "Adrien!" she complained. "We talked about this before. No Shakespeare in bed."

"But My Lady!" Adrien protested teasingly, "shall I compare thee to a summer's day?"

Marinette threw her pillow into Adrien's face.