I won't bore you with my excuses for the long delay however somehow sad Rachel always inspires me... So if anyone vaguely remembers this story here's the next chapter. Reviews are always appreciated :)


It had taken all Quinn's skill to avoid a meeting with Santana before the weekend after their eyes had met at the end of lunch and Santana had that infuriatingly irritating I-know-something-you-don't-want–me–to look. Quinn had hoped she had been imagining it but the Glee club members who had been seated at the table for that fateful 'chocolate brownie' lunch all began to treat the pair of them differently. She could deal with Brittany's manic grinning but avoiding being left alone with Santana took far more guile and cunning. Fortunately she had a physio appointment and the ability to persuade Rachel they needed to leave early as she was feeling a bit tired with the odd twinge of pain in her legs on the thursday. Quinn felt guilty about misleading Rachel in a bid to put off the inevitable conversation that Santana wanted to have. Rachel's solicitous care and sympathetic concern just made her feel guiltier about her duplicity.

She knew she'd been a bit less communicative than usual after physio and during their evening meal at hers. She'd noticed the sidelong glances Rachel threw her way when she thought Quinn wasn't looking. Then there was her mother cast appraising glances over the pair of them, her gaze switching between her and Rachel as the concern grew on her face. Quinn had a momentary panic attack that someone had said something to Judy. Her fear dissipated when Judy shot her an affectionate smile and asked whether she was okay as she'd been a bit quiet. She claimed tiredness from the exercises, a partial truth at best so she looked down at her plate as she said it. Rachel had immediately begun apologising for wearing Quinn out and for not noticing her tiredness, claiming she'd have gone home earlier if she'd realised. Rachel rushed to clear her place at the table and hurried out of the house with a half-hearted goodbye and such a pained look on her face. Quinn had quickly shut down all Judy's attempts to start up a discussion about what had happened and whether Rachel was upset. In the end she retired to her room early allegedly to have an early night but really to turn over the events of the past day in her head and to try and decide on a way forward.

Unfortunately lunch had seemed to persuade the Glee club to think she and Rachel were, well more than they were if her interpretation of Santana's smug look was accurate. It was made more complicated by the fact that she reluctantly had to acknowledge that she wished that they were. Just the idea of Rachel's lips pressed against hers was enough to make her hot and bothered. It wasn't worth considering for long. Her mother would have a fit and they were only just getting back on track in terms of their mother-daughter relationship before the accident had happened. She didn't dare risk her relationship with the only person left who loved her. Yes her mother seemed to like Rachel but that would soon wear off once Rachel moved from the good friend column and into the love-interest category. Quinn could almost hear her mother's so called friends being simultaneously scandalised and delighted as Quinn moved her mother on from her teenage pregnancy, banishment form the family home, near life or death experience through temporary paralysis only to throw lesbianism into the mix. In a rare moment of honesty with herself she acknowledged that if everything had been different – her family, her history and Rachel's heterosexuality – then just maybe she might think about making a move. But things weren't different and so she wasn't going to do anything to rock the rather unsteady boat she found herself in. Glee club hadn't so much got the wrong end of the stick as the wrong damn branch.

Quinn knew she needed to be less tactile with Rachel as that was the behaviour that seemed to be driving the assumption that there was something going on between them. She knew it would be difficult, as it had grown to be such a habit that it was almost automatic. Besides, she needed to change her behaviour gradually if she wasn't to alert Rachel or worry her. Quinn resolved to at least try and reduce her hugging or touching Rachel in sight of the rest of Glee club members. She just had to hope that some other relationship drama kicked off in the club so that attention switched from the non-story of her and Rachel. Nothing to see, nothing to know and nothing to gossip about.

Quinn had hoped against hope that the weekend would miraculously lead to everyone's memory being wiped and a return of her invisibility field. She'd fought hard to keep her fears at bay and her interactions with Rachel normal, but it was inevitable that the tension she felt seeped into their interplay. On Monday the knowing grins were still in place back at school and almost every seemingly innocuous remark had a hidden double meaning, how else to interpret Kurt's "I expect you two had a good weekend". On the plus side Rachel treated every remark at face value and her lack of awareness of the hidden agenda was yet another thing about her that Quinn found adorable.

Quinn headed to bed on the Tuesday evening convinced speculation about her and Rachel was finally beginning to die down. She'd successfully and subtlely avoided Santana and Rachel had stopped asking about Thursday night so just maybe the danger was receding. When her phone lit up she grabbed it expecting a cute chat with Rachel before bed. As she registered the sender's name as Santana her anxiety levels were already rising

Hey bitch we need to talk now that you've bagged a hobbit

Quinn had felt fear grip her as she read the text. In McKinley High the word association for hobbit was Rachel Berry. She took several calming breaths. She wasn't sure what 'bagged' meant and she'd rather not pursue that particular conversation. At best bagged would mean what it said and at worst it would be a crass euphemism for sex. Time was ticking away. The longer she delayed in replying, the more likely Santana was to think she was right. Old habits died hard so she settled for diverting the conversation.

Bagged a hobbit? Are you drunk? Stop watching Lord of the Rings and stick to soaps

Her relief at formulating a topic-avoiding reply was short-lived as Santana's response was almost instantaneous

Q I can see through your distraction techniques and can smell your fear from here.

Quinn scowled at her phone. She didn't want to have this conversation now but to leave it would imply Santana was right. She channelled her inner bitch.

As usual S your ability to talk out of your ass remains unrivalled by anyone else

It was an insult guaranteed to wind Santana up. Maybe distract her even into an insult trading exchange

Oh I don't know, you're giving me a good run for my money

Quinn smiled weakly. She'd managed to distract Santana but it was only briefly. Her phone lit up with another text

Have you done the dirty yet? I'm assuming not judging by the way you were creaming your pants when she was licking your fingers last week

Quinn cheeks reddened through acute embarrassment even as fear and shame warred to decide which would triumph as her emotional response to that text. Rachel licking the brownie crumbs from her fingers had left her incredibly turned on but she'd worked hard at not imagining that talented tongue anywhere else on her body. Quinn groaned and cut off that thought.

Rachel and I are just friends - she felt like she was writing a rather bland press release statement. Weren't they at the point these days where that sort of statement was a euphemism for the exact opposite? - So I'd thank you for keeping your fanciful and slanderous ideas to yourself.

It was a weak riposte but the fear and adrenalin racing through her system seemed to have affected her ability to think.

Whateva Q but most of Glee knows thanks to Lady Hummel. If you need to talk I'm here.

Talk was the last thing Quinn wanted to do and if she wanted a sympathetic ear Santana was possibly her second-to-last choice marginally ahead of her father. A relapse and a long hospital stay would be useful right now rather than having to face her wrongly informed peers and that smug smirk on Santana's begging to be slapped face. Maybe her lack of sleep over tthe last few days was affecting her ability to make rational judgments?

There's nothing to know and no need to talk.

It was a statement to reassure her rather than one that would stop Santana. Santana would be more than happy to make up what she didn't know and it would invariably be worse than the truth.

The offer stands once you've finished your cruise on that Egyptian river

Quinn resisted the urge to clarify what on earth Santana was on about. What had the Euphrates got to do with anything? She might have been a little more clued in if she'd paid more careful attention in geography classes but then again, maybe not. Dread was beginning to take hold and her world was narrowing to focus on her thoughts, feelings and biggest fears. Too many things were out of her control.

Rachel knew she had reputation for sometimes being insensitive to what was going on around her - her dads would sing a song by eighties band Aztec Camera and it took her weeks to realise the song was called 'Oblivious'. They'd been humming it quite a bit recently probably just to remind her of how painfully long it took her to identify the tune - but even she could detect some massive shift in the attitude of others towards her. Brittany would wink in a knowing manner at her but Rachel had no idea what Brittany thought she knew. Santana was actually sounding as though her dwarf, hobbit remarks were affectionate - maybe she was just projecting her own new found contentment and happiness with the world on to Santana and assigning affectionate tones where none existed? Tina seemed to blush every time she saw Rachel and mutter remarks about 'as long as Rachel was happy' before extreme embarrassment would silence her. Mike kept grinning at her and his fond smiles were beginning to make her wonder whether she needed to have a clear the air conversation with him about not being interested in a relationship at the moment and anyway what about Tina? Or was Tina already aware of Mike's crush on her and hence her ' as long as you're happy' remarks which frankly showed a maturity and self-sacrificing nobility that Rachel was unaware Tina possessed. Artie had been equally odd muttering about a Katy Perry song performance suddenly becoming much clearer just as Rachel felt everything was just becoming more blurred and confusing.

Each individual's behaviour on its own would hardly have made a bleep on her rather rusty, ill-used emotions-of-others radar but add to that Finn staring at her whenever they were in the same space and Quinn's sudden shyness about hugging her or squeezing her arm if one of the Glee club were in the vicinity and..well, Rachel was unsure what conclusion to come to. After several days of such strange behaviour and a slightly awkward weekend Rachel decided she needed answers before she spent all her spare time worrying about it and coming up with extremely unlikely and progressively more outlandish scenarios to explain the odd behaviour being directed her way. Or her and Quinn's way. Or maybe Quinn's way - it was difficult to tell seeings as she and Quinn spent almost all their time together.

Rachel's first port of call had been to run her perceptions past Quinn as a reality check to ensure she wasn't imagining things so when they were in the library that tuesday afternoon and after many false starts Rachel finally managed to broach the subject.

"Quinn," that was the easy part but now how to phrase her question in a subtle manner so that if she was wrong she didn't come across like a complete idiot," Have you noticed anything odd about the Glee club's behaviour towards me?"

Well maybe not subtle but at least she'd got the conversational ball rolling...

"No," replied Quinn not even looking up from her notes. Quinn felt her heart begin to race with fear. Rachel had noticed. She needed to be nonchalant and dismissive. She couldn't look at Rachel just yet as her fear might show.

Okay maybe the conversational ball would need a bit more of an impetus. Rachel studied Quinn carefully wondering about the wisdom of bringing up her next opening gambit. Her and Quinn were working towards being best friends and she didn't want to jeopardise that. She really didn't. It already felt a bit like Quinn was becoming fed up with her what with her jumpiness whenever Rachel touched her and how she'd stiffened when Rachel had hugged her in front of her locker for remembering yet more of Judy's vegan brownies. It wasn't as if she'd had a best friend before outside Kindergarten and that had been formed on the rather trivial basis of a shared interest in dressing up as princesses and then singing. Rachel focussed her thoughts. What kind of best friends would Quinn and her be if they couldn't discuss absolutely everything honestly?

"Quinn," she said only to be acknowledged with an 'hmmm' and still no eye contact. Quinn was hoping her 'engrossed in my work' act would deter Rachel from pursuing the conversation any further but deep down she knew how unlikely that was. Rachel's tenacity made a dog with a bone come across as half-hearted and lacking conviction.

"Quinn," this time Rachel's tone was a bit more forceful and hazel eyes suddenly met hers. Rachel reached out to place her hand on Quinn's arm as if gently stroking that pale skin with her thumb would help soothe any upset her next words might cause. Quinn concentrated on Rachel's face to avoid the distracting jolts of electricity heating up her arm under Rachel's touch. If Santana could see them now she'd be laughing at her.

"When you were pregnant with Beth," began a nervous Rachel. Quinn's face lost all expression and her eyes suddenly narrowed. Rachel quickly used her other hand to gently hold Quinn's other arm before moving so she held Quinn's hands in hers, effectively making it impossible for Quinn to leave the conversation or the table they were sat at. "There was this period of time where everyone in Glee except me - and Finn - knew the baby was Puck's. I had this unsettling feeling that I couldn't rationalise away that everyone knew something I didn't and that I was in some way out of step with absolutely everyone else. I put it down to my social awkwardness, lack of friends, loser status,... anything I could think of really and yet the feeling persisted. Everyone was in the loop except me - not the usual being out of the loop because I'm a loser - something far more unsettling..."

Quinn's stony features morphed into an expression of concern and she tried to offer comfort by squeezing Rachel's hands.

"I'm sorry," began Quinn as Rachel's tears escaped from her eyes. Rachel pulled a hand away from Quinn's to wipe away her tears, annoyed at becoming emotional.

"This isn't about the bullying, or you not telling me about Puck," Rachel paused to take a steadying breath, "it's about that being out of tune, isolated, possibly being laughed at, feeling," Rachel paused to will herself not to shed anymore tears," It was horrible and the longer it lasted the worse I felt until I was convinced that maybe I had mental health problems," she paused to gather herself together again and then tried to lighten the mood," Never self diagnose from the Internet," Quinn's smile was weak at best. " Anyway I have that feeling again. I need to know whether you feel it too or if I'm missing something or even if it's just nothing."

Rachel decided not to share how all pervasive the feeling was. She didn't just have it at school but at her home and at Quinn's too. Last time during Quinn's pregnancy she'd had relief from her paranoia at home, but now she was beginning to wonder whether in fact she was suffering from a mental illness, after all, to experience this out of step ness everywhere was worse than before.

Quinn wrestled with her conscience and the urge to pull Rachel in for a hug. She could see all the emotions Rachel was experiencing on her face and those tear filled eyes were almost impossible to resist. But what could she say that wouldn't damage the fledgling friendship that they already had? There was nothing going on between the pair of them and the Glee members would quickly realise that and they'd just have been a one-minute wonder on the gossip network. If on the other hand she told Rachel what was going on…no, that just wasn't an option.

"I don't have that feeling," said Quinn softly even as an inner voice snarked - that's because you know what this is about- ," but that doesn't mean your feelings aren't valid."

Quinn felt her reply was honest, tactful and highly misleading. There was no joy in getting herself out of an awkward situation whilst not lying.

Rachel's lip bite coincided with a new wave of tears and an emphatic nod of her head. Quinn's resolve wavered for a moment before she decided to fall back on old habits.

"Maybe everyone's just behaving a bit differently because they're a bit awkward about your break up with Finn?" Quinn suggested.

Rachel gazed back as if surprised. Sometimes she completely forgot that her and Finn had only recently stopped being an item. What a monumental poor piece of judgment it had been to ever date him. Rachel decided to resist the urge to berate herself about the wasted time spent trying to make that leaden lump happy. She nearly married him for goodness sake. She shifted her attention back to the reason she'd begun this conversation.

"So if," began Rachel in a quiet voice. She was hesitant to say this because it would expose her lack of faith in their friendship but she needed the reassurance. She swallowed and tried again ignoring the patheticness creeping into her tone," if there was something you'd tell me?"

Quinn couldn't bring herself to speak the words of betrayal so instead after ensuring she had Rachel's full eye contact she nodded her head. Rachel gazed at Quinn a little longer and as Quinn slid her gaze away she knew she'd damaged their friendship with her need for reassurance. Quinn was obviously beginning to think she was a bit mad and that was why she no longer met her gaze. Rachel was used to being picked up and dropped by fickle friends, she just couldn't work out why this hurt so much more than in the past.

"I need to get a drink,' she managed to choke out as in one fluid movement she pulled her hands away from Quinn's and spun out of her chair. She speed walked to the exit willing her tears not to fall in public. She concentrated on counting her steps as she went to distract herself from tear inducing thoughts that fluttered around the edge of her consciousness.

Quinn watched Rachel rush away knowing the unseemly haste could only mean Rachel was on the verge of yet more tears. She watched her retreating back and hated herself. In her bid to keep Rachel's friendship she'd inadvertently hurt her and made their friendship less secure. Way to go Quinn.

Rachel spent a while trying to use cold water on her face to reduce the noticeable effects of her tears. As she exited the restroom she bumped into Brittany. It was too good an opportunity to miss. Maybe Brittany would tell her what the winking was about and then they could laugh at her paranoia and she could get back to working on mending fences with Quinn. Her decision to cross-examine Brittany about it had been made but she was wrong footed by Brittany suddenly giving her a huge hug and saying

"I know, but your secret's safe with me." This was followed by another of Brittany's knowing winks, which by now had moved on from puzzling Rachel into completely disconcerting her.

"Brittany, I've no idea what you're talking about," Rachel had protested with all the puzzlement and bewilderment she could muster being injected into her response. Did Brittany's words mean there was something going on that she didn't know? Or was it just Brittany being Brittany?

There had been a moment, as Brittany's expression turned serious as she scrutinised Rachel carefully, when Rachel thought she'd actually find out what was going on in Brittany's head. A scary thought but at this juncture the best she could hope for. But it only lasted for a moment before Brittany laughed as if Rachel had said the funniest thing ever. Brittany hugged her again before stepping away

"Wow, you're good Rachel," commented Brittany as more laughter escaped from her," for a second I almost believed you. You don't need acting lessons."

Rachel tried to reign in her frustration. She schooled her features to reflect her genuine bewilderment. A slightly pleading tone and a gentle hand on Brittany's arm and she was ready with an imploring

"I assure you Brittany, I really don't know what you're talking about. Please enlighten me," Rachel knew the pleading look and the hesitant hopeful tone that dropped to a pained whisper had never failed her before. Until now that was as Brittany squealed with delight exclaiming

"Amazing, like really wow. You're so talented Rachel." and with yet another of those infuriating winks Brittany rushed off to join the Cheerios' practice that Rachel had waylaid her from.

Rachel watched her go but didn't have time to dwell on her confusion and frustration at being so close to finding out what was going on because Kurt and Mercedes were making a beeline for her down the corridor. She glanced behind her. Yes, it was indeed a beeline for her, which had to be a first. A big beaming smile was in place to greet them when they finally made it into polite conversation range. Inside she might be anxious and bewildered but outside it was business as usual.

"Well," dragged out Kurt," you're a bit of a dark horse."

Rachel looked at him appraisingly uncertain whether to be insulted about the comparison to a horse.

"Um hmm," joined in Mercedes," You go gurl. And to think we almost didn't see what was right in front of us"

The pair insisted on high fiving her.

"So what was right in front of you?" asked Rachel deciding that McKinley's biggest gossips would be only too willing to let her in on what was going on - if anything. She usually steered clear of gossip as a frivolous activity and immense waste of time but today she was prepared to make an exception.

Kurt punched her playfully on the arm.

"Oh you're such a tease," he grinned at her.

"No really, I've no idea," Rachel's plea of ignorance was quite genuine but only seemed to amuse Mercedes and Kurt.

"You might be able to fool the rest of the school with that act but we know you," said Mercedes with a grin," Who'd have thought eh?"

"Well certainly not me," replied Rachel deciding that she should keep the conversation going in the hope the pair would reveal something.

"If you ever want to talk about it we'd be all ears," offered Kurt as he and Mercedes glanced hopefully at each other.

"And of course you can rely on our complete discretion," purred Mercedes in what she hoped was a reassuring manner.

Rachel eyed the pair of them warily, "Of course" she replied as the pair of gossips in front of her waited in eager anticipation.

The silence lengthened until Kurt could bear it no longer.

"So how does it feel now you've crossed over to the dark side?" His reverent whispering of 'the dark side' suggested she was meant to understand what on earth he was implying.

Rachel's thoughts raced. Were they suggesting she'd suddenly developed interests in the satanic arts? Or she'd joined Vocal Adrenalin? Or that maybe she enjoyed Star Wars role-playing games on the side of the Empire? She could feel her mini audiences excited expectations resting on her next answer.

"Well, I must say I'm enjoying every minute at the moment," Rachel paused to lick her lips nervously," It's so much better than I could have hoped but quite exhausting."

Mercedes wide-eyed stunned look was mildly gratifying and Kurt looked a cross between surprised and pleased.

"I should have known from your sensible shoes," he managed to say before Rachel's hopes of further revelations - although dark side and sensible shoes were hardly much of a clue - were dashed by the arrival of Quinn on the scene. Her disappointment was momentary; her pleasure at knowing Quinn had come looking for her lasted much longer.

By the Glee club meeting at the end of the day Rachel had stored her interactions with Brittany, Kurt and Mercedes away for scrutiny at a later time. She even managed to disguise her dismay when Santana unexpectedly sat in the seat next to her in the front row rather than choosing her usual back row spot. Rachel could feel Quinn's posture stiffen beside her.

"So Q, B and I were just discussing how long it's been since we've had a girls movie night," Santana volunteered brightly.

Quinn's grunt of acknowledgement gave little away in terms of how she felt about that.

"How about this friday?" asked an undeterred Santana.

"Rachel and I will be busy then," snapped Quinn. Rachel tried not to look surprised, as Quinn and her didn't have a definite arrangement for Friday beyond their usual spend all their time together.

"Oh I don't doubt it," smarmed Santana as her eyes roved lazily over Rachel's body in a manner that made Rachel feel distinctly uncomfortable,"but maybe Berry can put off practising breathing through her ears for one night.."

"Santana," interrupted Quinn with a threatening growl as Rachel tried to decode Santana's remark. Did hobbits breathe through their ears, was that what that reference was about?

"Look, you can bring your pet hobbit with you," offered Santana as she and Quinn entered a staring competition across Rachel. There was a vibe of hostility in the air that didn't really sit comfortably with the actual topic of conversation. Santana broke off from staring at Quinn to rummage in her bag.

"Rachel," Santana started," I've got these vegan brownies for you. I thought that maybe Quinn could.."

"Okay," said Quinn angrily her cheeks flushed, "We'll be there."

"I think you mean you'll come," laughed Santana,"cos it sounds like you need to."

Quinn's non-verbal middle finger response surprised Rachel. For almost her entire school career she'd just wanted an invite to a girls night with her peers so now that it had finally happened why wasn't she happier? The fact that Quinn reached across to squeeze her hand distracted her. It had been a while since Quinn had initiated any hand holding between them.

The surprises weren't over. At the end of rehearsal Mike and Tina approached them. After a moment's awkward silence Tina found her voice.

"Mike and I were thinking that as it's two-for-one night at the local cinema maybe you'd like to join us on a double d..?"

"Bill" interjected Mike less than smoothly on seeing the stricken look on Quinn's face," or failing that just a single showing of a rom-com"

"Horror" protested Tina

"Rom-com" insisted Mike.

"Rom coms are always the same," moaned Tina," Two attractive single people meet, instant dislike, sparks fly, they're separated by some ridiculous plot device and finally after much heartache realise that actually love each other."

"Unlike horror films where ridiculously attractive but incredibly dense in terms of personal safety teenagers get picked off one by one in increasingly gruesome ways by some psychopath who's problems stem from extremely poor parenting or being bullied..." replied Mike as Tina rolled her eyes

"We'd love to join you" interrupted Quinn once Rachel smiled her agreement,"predictable rom-com being our preference." Rachel gave an emphatic nod of agreement. She was too squeamish for horror films.

"Thanks for the invitation," Rachel said shyly as Mike smiled at her and Tina finally managed to catch her eye without being embarrassed. Quinn and Mike discussed logistics as Rachel lost herself in thought. What a weird week. On the one hand there was this unsettling whatever it was feeling and on the other it seemed like members of the Glee club were keen to watch movies with her and Quinn. Was this what it was like to have proper friends? Maybe everything was finally coming together for her, goodness knows she'd waited long enough.