Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, the characters, or anything else involving that cool series. And wouldn't it be neat if I made any money on it, as opposed to the nada I actually do make at the moment.
A/N Oh wow…thank you so much for the reviews. I know I write what makes me laugh, but it's nice to know that others are actually getting a kick out of this too!
CHAPTER 9: The Best Laid Plans of Foxes and Men
By the end of the school day, Kagome had realized 3 things.
1) Inuyasha was an insensitive idiot who rarely thought before he spoke.
2) She'd known that forever and thinking that he'd suddenly change made her an idiot.
3) If he'd really thought any of the things she'd accused him of, he would have said something about it a long time ago because, well, refer back to point #1.
So as she walked into the school yard after classes ended, she was well past being angry anymore. Seeing him waiting for her, back in his red robes with the white kimono underneath, baseball cap firmly in place, she shook her head. He just looked so ridiculous stalking towards her in that mismatched get up, glaring at every boy he passed on the way, that she had to giggle. As she suddenly noticed her friends converging on her position, however, the urge to laugh faded and she grimaced. She'd managed to avoid being cornered by them all day so far, but now…time to face the music.
Inuyasha, who'd stepped up the pace once he saw her, arrived first. He stared at her with shadowed eyes, hovering on the edge between worry and annoyance about the next few minutes. Poor Inuyasha, sometimes she forgot just how…fragile…he could be, in spite of his tough attitude. He'd had so little softness in his life, no wonder he was worried. He probably thought what friendship they had might disappear if they got too angry with each other. She stepped forward and took his hand with a smile.
"I'm sorry, Inuyasha."
"Uh, you are?" his surprised look had her smile a little wider.
"Yeah. I shouldn't have pushed you into doing something you were uncomfortable with. I know I'd hate it if you'd tried something like that with me. Especially when it's something you viewed as, well, indecent and all…"
"EEEEK!" a squeal in triple stereo behind her had her turning around quickly. Three sets of eyes stared at her in shock and she was roughly yanked into a circle of 'friends.' Interrogation was immediate.
"Indecent? What have you been doing with this guy, Kagome?!" Eri asked
"Yeah, what kind of relationship do you two have, anyway?" Yuka glanced back and forth between Inuyasha and Kagome suspiciously.
"Does he have a brother?" asked Ayumi hopefully.
Kagome pressed her hands to her hot cheeks and struggled to find something to say. "It's-it's not like that! We're not even dating!"
They all looked at her as though that made it even worse.
"Wait, if he's not your boyfriend…is this the guy who asked you to have his baby???" Eri looked over at Inuyasha in gleeful horror.
"Oooooh, I bet he is! With that long hair and those old fashioned clothes, trying to look all mysterious. I bet he's a total hentai!" Yuka concluded as she and Eri nodded to each other in perfect accord.
"But he's still kinda cute." Ayumi mumbled under her breath.
Inuyasha's patience ran out at that point and he shoved Yuka and Eri aside, grabbing Kagome's hand. "Will you vultures shut up already? Kagome has to get home and she doesn't need all this shit from you. Crap, you'd think you could just mind your own damn business or something!" He pulled Kagome away from the annoying, yapping women and turned to go. They stared after them with identical expressions of offended surprise, but at least this time they didn't follow them out.
"Shit, Kagome, is everyone in your time an idiot or somethin'?" he said as he started dragging her off the school grounds. "I mean, I knew I was going to have to look out for all these damn boys, but I didn't know the girls would be assholes too!"
"I- they're not! They're just, well, looking out for me." …in their own annoying way, admittedly, but still…
"Looking out for you? Looking out for something to accuse you of, is what it looks like." Dammit, here they went again. Kagome always thought people were better than they really were. How the hell did she survive on her own this long?! Man, protecting her at school was really going to be a chore if she never figured out just how nasty people could really be.
"Inuyasha! That's not fair; they're not like that!"
"Feh, like I believe that. They just better not pull any of that sort of shit with you while I'm around or they'll regret it." He muttered, and continued the walk back to the shrine, still holding her hand.
Kagome rolled her eyes and let the subject drop. It just wasn't worth arguing over, and it wasn't like he'd really doing anything to her friends anyway. Probably.
As they walked, Kagome found herself periodically glancing down at where their hands met. She couldn't stop herself. Why was it that she could cook for him, spend all day with him, sleep near him…heck, even spend some of the day riding around on his back…and it was no problem? But right now, the warmth of his hand holding hers made her completely self-conscious? She couldn't take her mind of the feel of his skin, the slight roughness of his calloused hand as it rubbed against her own.
Jeez, girl, you are seriously nuts, she thought to herself. How can you want to kill him in the morning and get all gooey inside by the afternoon? It's ridiculous! Get a grip, Kagome!
To her chagrin, Inuyasha was oblivious. "Hey, Kagome, do you think you could have everything ready to leave by tonight?" he asked.
"Uh, sure. Why?"
"We haven't looked for a jewel shard in ages. We'll do better on an early start if we go back tonight."
"Oh. Okay, sure. That sounds fine." She mumbled, sighing. Why did she keep hoping he felt something more for her? How pathetic. "Just fine."
xxxxxxxx
The next morning, just as the sun made its way over the horizon, Kagome and Sango watched Inuyasha pace impatiently on the road out of the village, while Shippou and Kirara simply lounged on the ground, half asleep again.
"Miroku!" Inuyasha yelled, "What the hell is taking so long? Everyone else is waiting for you, you idiot Houshi, get your ass moving and let's go!"
"Inuyasha!"
He flinched and looked next to him into Kagome's brown eyed glare. "What?"
"You don't have to be so rude, you know." She said, yawning.
"Well…he doesn't have to be so damn slow! What the hell is he doing in there anyway, laying eggs? He and Kaede-sama are taking forever."
"Actually, I'm not really sure…" Kagome said slowly.
"Herbs!" Sango blurted out.
"Yeah, herbs…he needs lots of herbs." Shippou echoed, sitting up straighter and rubbing the sleep from his eyes.
Inuyasha and Kagome exchanged glances and Kagome shrugged. "She does have a lot of herbal remedies, I guess." Kagome said. She jumped when Inuyasha yelled again.
"It's about damn time, Miroku! Come on! Hurry it up!"
Miroku, finally visible in front of Kaede's, ignored him as he bowed low at the shadowed entrance and then strolled away from Kaede's hut towards Inuyasha.
"Calm yourself, Inuyasha. A small pause before we start the journey will not affect our search for the shards, now will it?" Miroku asked reasonably as he neared them.
"It could." Inuyasha muttered childishly as he glared at him. Miroku ducked his head to stifle a chuckle, and then slid his gaze to Shippou briefly.
"You must think we're all stupid, Inuyasha." Shippou said as soon as he caught Miroku's glance. "Admit it, you just want a chance to carry Kagome around." Inuyasha's head swung around like a dog going on point and his eyes narrowed as quickly as his cheeks turned red.
"What did you say, runt?"
Shippou poofed into a clone of Inuyasha with the addition of a small foxtail. Inuyasha II clasped his hands against his chest dramatically and started speaking in a high, falsetto voice. "Oh, Kagome, if only I could carry you around on my back all day long." He sighed longingly. "All I want to do is feel your lovely body close to me and…"
"Why you little pervert! You are dead, brat!" Inuyasha roared as he leapt after Shippou, who had wisely started to run down the trail as soon as Inuyasha started yelling.
Kagome stared after them with her mouth open, but oddly enough, Sango was ignoring them completely and had raised an eyebrow at the nearby Miroku. 'Lovely body?' she mouthed at him silently, and he grinned rather sheepishly and shrugged.
"It was effective, wasn't it?" he whispered quietly to her, and she rolled her eyes.
"Stop corrupting him, you Hentai." She admonished softly, and then raised her voice to call to Kagome. "I'll go after them, Kagome. " Kagome nodded briefly, still rather confused.
Miroku watched Sango as she leapt onto Kirara and they took off. He rubbed a finger over his lips speculatively as he stared after her. Ever since he'd caressed Sango during Inuyasha and Kagome's spat, he couldn't get the feel of her off his mind. Memories of that brief span of time were putting rather graphic thoughts into his head at the most unexpected moments. And now, ever since that pre-dawn discussion with Inuyasha, he'd been…distracted. Thinking of Sango with other men had been vividly unpleasant, to say the least.
At the same time, he couldn't imagine such a vibrant woman as Sango living out the rest of her life alone. However, the only alternative to an unknown husband or life-long solitude was one that he was a little leery of embracing. Contemplating that level of commitment, with so much uncertainty in his life, was more than he was willing to do just yet. But still… He rubbed his finger over his lips again, thinking of her body once more.
I wonder what Sango tastes like?
"Uh, Miroku, shouldn't we be following?" Kagome interrupted his thoughts.
Flushing, he looked over at her and smiled, trying to cover his surprise. "Oh, of course, of course. Before I forget, though, I…have something that Kaede-sama asked me to give to you."
"Really? She didn't mention it earlier."
He smiled brightly, still trying to regain his equilibrium. To be caught fantasizing like that... "I believe she'd forgotten. Here," he reached into the neck of his robes and pulled out a small bundle of red silk, no bigger than a yen piece, tied with a thin blue silk cord. "This can help strengthen your abilities against certain types of youkai."
Kagome looked at the bundle curiously. "Really? What is it?" She asked, starting to untie the cord.
"Careful, please." said Miroku, "Do not touch the contents, Kagome-sama." She stopped unwinding the cord immediately.
"What's wrong? Is it a spell?"
He waved his hands genially as he exhaled. "No, no, nothing like that. It's simply an herb from the mainland that has special properties. But it's also quite deadly. I would hate for you to get any of it on your hands and accidentally ingest it later." he glanced up nonchalantly, reassuring himself that Inuyasha was still out of sight. "You're welcome to open it if you like, just be careful, please."
She nodded and slowly unwrapped the bundle to find a small sprig of dried purple flowers. "How pretty." She said, wrapping them back up after a brief look. "What is it called?"
"Monkshood…I believe Kaede-sama thought the name made me the appropriate bearer of the gift." He said wryly, and she laughed.
"Well, I guess that's a good name for something that works against demons, too."
"Quite definitely." He gestured to the bundle as she finished tying the blue cord around it. "I understand you may have to wear it close to your body for a few days for the full effects to be felt, so now might be the best moment to try it on. Hopefully, it can be at full strength if we encounter any dangerous situations."
She looked at him curiously while putting a loop of the cord around her neck. "If you say so." She said, tucking it under the collar of her shirt.
Miroku glanced down the road again and added, "I'd also appreciate it if you told any –interested parties- that this was from Kaede-sama and let my name remain unmentioned for the moment."
"Huh? Why?"
Miroku smiled. "Considering how things turned out the last time Inuyasha saw a man giving you gifts, I think it might be best not to test his limits, even if I am simply passing along another's offerings."
"Aaaah, forgot about that for a moment." She glanced along the road as well before nodding. "From Kaede, definitely."
"Thank you, Kagome-sama. You're graciousness is appreciated." He said gallantly, and she smiled. Sometimes she really wished Inuyasha would be a little more like Miroku, at least when it came to manners. The roaming hands she could do without, but no one could ever deny that Miroku could be as smooth as silk when he wanted to be.
"Shall we catch up to the others?" he said, starting down the path.
"Sure, sure. Of course." She said quickly, and followed behind. Maybe I should ask him give Inuyasha some lessons, she speculated.
xxxxxx
Inuyasha's temper had blown over quickly, as usual, but Sango and Shippou stayed on Kirara for the entire day, just as a precaution. Unfortunately, Shippou's stupid stunt had made Inuyasha so self-conscious that he'd studiously avoided Kagome for most of the trip. Since she hadn't brought her bicycle this time around, that meant she was stuck walking or riding Kirara. And since Kirara was up in the air keeping Shippou out of harms way, that left…walking. Kagome's feet were killing her! To top it all off, having to walk made their pace so slow that they hadn't been able to make it to the next village. They had to rough it in the woods for the night.
With aching feet and a cold, hard bed to look forward to, Kagome's temper was completely frayed. She slumped on the ground against a fallen tree and looked at Shippou as he scampered around the camp. If not for his ridiculous mimicry…maybe I should let Inuyasha smack Shippou around more often, if he's making comments like that about me, anyway, she thought grumpily.
As always, when this was put to the test not more than 15 minutes later, Kagome couldn't let him get pounded. She sighed, watching as Inuyasha started to chase the kitsune around the campsite. If Shippou had been a little older, she might be tempted to let him have it, but as it was….
Inuyasha had just about grabbed Shippou when he felt a small thump in the back of his head. "Wha-?" he stopped and turned, rearing back as a stone whizzed through the air and missed his face by inches.
"Oops, sorry Inuyasha." Said Kagome casually. "I didn't think you'd turn around after that first one."
"Did you just throw a rock at me?" he asked, instantly transferring his irritation from Shippou to Kagome.
"Uh-huh."
"What the hell for?"
Kagome rolled her eyes and didn't even bother to get up from her sitting position. "I want you to leave Shippou alone."
"So what! That doesn't mean you should throw rocks at me!"
"Well, I can't sit you anymore, can I? And it's not like you'd listen if I asked you to stop."
"You could at least try it first before pelting me with pebbles, you idiot! OW!" he cried out as another rock flew in and smacked him in the nose.
"Oops." Kagome said insincerely, glaring at him. "Sorry, it slipped. Guess it's a good thing you're a hanyou and it doesn't hurt, huh?"
"Why you little…" Inuyasha growled, and started towards her.
Miroku broke in, "Excuse me, Inuyasha, but you may want to…"
"Stay out of this, Houshi!" Inuyasha said, "This is between Kagome and me. That goes for you too!" he said, glaring quickly at Sango, who blinked at him in surprise. "Don't even think about pulling the same Kirara trick you pulled this morning." He turned back to Kagome, who was now standing and looking just the smallest bit nervous.
"What are you doing, Inuyasha?" she asked warily, trying to sound in control.
"I've had about enough of this shit, Kagome." He said angrily, stalking closer.
"Enough of what?" she asked. What was he going to do? He wasn't going to start grabbing her again, was he?
"You! You insult me, you slap me, you kick me, you give me orders as though I'm an idiot, you even tried to take off my clothes!"
"Eh, what was that?' interrupted Miroku, his ears perking up until Sango smacked him.
Inuyasha ignored him, "…and now you don't even bother talking to me at all, you just start throwing shit at me! "
Kagome hmphed, anger coming to her rescue. "What the heck am I supposed to do?! Violence is the only thing that ever sticks in that stupid hard head of yours! Whenever I actually try to talk to you, YOU NEVER LISTEN!"
Inuyasha was now inches away from her and they glared at each other. "Well, maybe if you started talking to me now, I'd start listening, you ever think of that!" he yelled in her face.
"No, I didn't!" she yelled back, and they both scowled, panting as though they'd run a race. As the tense silence lengthened, they continued their antagonistic staring contest, their breathing slowing. Inuyasha stared down at her and found himself distracted by the glisten of sunset caught in her hair. As she finally averted her eyes, he noticed the brush of her long eyelashes against cheeks that were blooming with color even as he watched.
What were they arguing about again?
Kagome chewed at her lip for a moment, and Inuyasha's gaze was snared by the small movement. Following the path of her little pink tongue, he watched, mesmerized, as she licked her lips self-consciously. Last time, she had tasted so good... He leaned in and realized that he was so close he could see the silky hair next to her cheek move slightly as he exhaled. He gulped nervously. So close… His hand moved forward and cupped her cheek. Her skin always felt so damn soft, he thought, brushing his thumb across her slightly parted lips.
He brought up his other hand and ended with both of them buried in her hair as she looked back up at him with rosy cheeks and those dark, vulnerable eyes. How can she be this sweet, he wondered, inhaling slightly, and leaned in. His lips pressed against hers softly, eschewing any further pressure as he simply let himself feel her, breathing in the interesting new scent on her skin and her hair and…
"Ahem."
Inuyasha and Kagome jumped apart and slightly dazed eyes looked over at Miroku, who smiled broadly and gave them a little wave. Inuyasha's face glowed brighter than Kagome's.
"Eh…just, don't do it again, dammit!" Inuyasha said, flustered and obviously even more angry at being so. He looked down at Kagome's face for one more moment as though compelled before turning rather clumsily away, heading to the other end of the camp. Kagome stared after him, her hand covering her now bereft lips, while Shippou and Sango stood next to Miroku and sighed.
"Why'd you do that, Miroku?" whispered Shippou, "It was just getting good!" Miroku bopped him on the head.
"There are some things between a couple that deserve privacy." He said softly.
"But we spy on them all the time…" Shippou started to say, and Miroku grabbed his ear and bent down, whispering fiercely.
"Let me rephrase, then. There are some things between a couple that they need to believe are private moments, hmmmm?" He let go and stood up as Shippou rubbed his ear. Sango gave Miroku a sardonic look.
"Pervert." She said quietly out of the side of her mouth.
"If I was really such a hentai, I wouldn't have said anything. In fact, considering that I'm the one who interrupted them, doesn't that make you the pervert?" Miroku pointed out.
Sango snorted. "I was just about to step in, Houshi."
"Of course you were." He replied with a twist to his lips. "Although, if memory serves, you were sitting right next to me behind the bushes the last few times, weren't you?" He asked. His voice positively sang. "Sango's a hentai." Grinning innocently, he reached out to rub her backside. She paused for a moment before knocking him flat.
"You are such an idiot, Houshi." She muttered. Rubbing his cheek, he couldn't hold back a laugh.
"Only where you're concerned, Sango." He said, smiling at Sango's suddenly red face. "Only where you're concerned."
xxxxxxxx
The next morning they started out early, with Inuyasha grumbling constantly since Kagome had only brought a week's worth of ramen. Or rather, a week's worth of ramen until Inuyasha got a hold of it. As it stood, they had just stopped by the side of a rutted dirt track for their ramen-deficient lunch when Kagome looked up towards the mountains north of them and yelled out.
"I sense jewel shards, Inuyasha. They're coming closer!" Everyone immediately stood up and readied their weapons, staring northwards.
Inuyasha tried to catch a scent in the air. "I don't smell Naraku, at least. Although…"
"It's 2 shards, coming in fast." Kagome said, concentrating. "I think it might be…"
"Kouga!" Inuyasha spat out, catching his scent, and then grinned suddenly. "Oh Kouga, you are dead! I'm gonna kick your ass so hard your children will be born dizzy! Man, this is gonna be a great day!"
Kagome turned to him, "Don't you dare, Inuyasha! Kouga-kun is a friend!"
"He's no friend of mine!" He growled back at her. "And he wants to make you more than a friend, don't forget! I'm sorry, but this time he is one dead wolf."
Kagome stomped her foot. "Inuyasha! You will not – " she stopped as his hand covered her mouth and he looked serious for a moment.
"Kagome, there are a lot of things I would do for you," he said quietly. "but not this. I'm sorry, but that mangy wolf is not going to just stroll in and flirt with you and try to take you away from me without suffering the consequences. You can't ask me to just ignore that sort of crap." He stared at her and felt himself wavering at the look in her eyes. NO, he was not going to give in on this! Kouga was never going to leave Kagome alone if he didn't beat the ever-loving shit out of him. Didn't she understand how dangerous he was?
He stared at Kagome some more, feeling her lips, soft and fluttering, against the palm of his hand. Wavering, wavering….no! "I – if he doesn't come near you, I'll leave him alone, okay? Okay? Feh." He let go of her mouth and turned away, snarling. Wimp, he growled at himself. Stupid idiot, can't even say no to stupid Kagome and….
We need to take that wolf down, his conscience said firmly.
Like I needed your permission.
Well actually…
Give it up, I ain't ever needed your permission before and I'm not about to start now.
Fine. Wise ass. I bet Kagome gets permission from her conscience before she tries to do anything, his conscience grumbled.
Yeah, well I bet her conscience is a hell of a lot nicer than you!
And whose fault is that?
Oh just shut up, will ya? Inuyasha ordered, and waited impatiently for his rival to arrive.
His thoughts refused to settle. Why couldn't Kagome understand? Inuyasha grumbled to himself. Kouga had already taken her away once, didn't she think he'd do it again? Did she think it was some kind of joke? That Kouga wouldn't have tried something a long time ago if Inuyasha hadn't stopped him? Why couldn't she see him for what he was? Why was she always seeing the best in people where it didn't exist? Aaargh, she was driving him crazy.
Kagome, meanwhile, was thinking about Inuyasha's words.
"…take you away from me… Is that what he said?" Kagome thought as she stared into the air. She knew he got jealous of everyone and everything that took time away from him and the jewel shards, but did he actually care if someone took her away from just him? He'd hated Kouga for so long, she had a hard time thinking that it even had anything to do with her any more. Except, what he'd just said made it sound like it did. Darn it, why did he have to be so hard to figure out?
Miroku glanced briefly at the couple before turning to Sango and Shippou. "You ready?" he asked quietly.
"I don't know, Houshi-sama," Sango said reluctantly. "Inuyasha did have a point last night, don't you think? Have we become so used to his obstinacy that we don't even bother to reason with him? Aren't we doing exactly what he and Kagome argued over?"
"Well of course we are." Miroku said with a grin. "Yes, reason is the first resort of a thinking being. However, when it comes to Kouga, Inuyasha ceases to be a thinking being. He's emotion and muscle at that point."
Shippou laughed and Sango shook her head. "Houshi…"
"I truly think this is our best chance to deal with the situation, especially as Myouga should already be on his way back. The timing couldn't be better. I don't think any of us believe this difficulty will simply go away on its own, do we?" They both shook their heads. "Still, if you both feel that we should stop, I'll accede to your wishes. We should do this together or not at all." Miroku said, still speaking in a low voice.
Shippou and Sango shared a look and sighed in unison. "We'll do it." They both said. Sango hopped onto Kirara and took off into the air. Shippou headed over closer towards Inuyasha, and Miroku went to stand a short distance from Inuyasha as well. It shouldn't be long now, Miroku thought, just as wind funnel appeared through the trees headed in their direction. The funnel spun up to them in moments, coming to a halt just in front of Kagome to reveal Kouga, hands on his hips and grinning broadly.
"Oy, Kagome! How is my mate doing this lovely afternoon?" He called out loudly. Inuyasha growled low in his throat and Kouga sniffed the air. "Hey, is that dog shit I smell?" he asked, turning around. "Oh, my mistake. It's just you, mongrel. You been taking care of my woman for me?"
"Get away from Kagome, you bastard." Inuyasha spat, and reached for his sword.
"Look out, Inuyasha!" Sango cried out as she and Kirara dove at his position. He jumped back a few feet to avoid being hit as they just skimmed the ground before making it back into the sky.
"What the hell's wrong with you!" Inuyasha yelled, shaking a fist up at her. Stupid Taijiya! Looking back at Kouga, he reached for Tessaiga again.
"Kazaana!" Inuyasha heard just as he felt a huge pull sideways.
"What the hell!" he yelled out as he was pulled off his feet and into the air. The air shrieked past for a moment, and then went silent and he fell heavily onto the ground. He stood up and shook his head, trying to get his bearings. What just happened…?
"Aagh, Inuyasha, catch them, catch them! They're gonna fall!" Inuyasha looked up at Shippou's scream to see a few small bits hurtling towards him. He didn't even pause before jumping up and grabbing what he could catch, a few in each hand. He landed with a thump and held out the contents of his hands in disgust towards Shippou.
"Shippou, I don't have time for any more of this crap, whatever it is, so shut up until I deal with Kouga!" he yelled, and then cursed as he was suddenly dragged to the ground by the objects in his hands. "Fucking hell!" On one hand were 2 large rocks, and on the other were 3, each with a familiar sutra on top. "Shippou, I am going to kill you, you dirty little sneak! Get these offa me!" he roared, pulling ineffectively at his now trapped hands.
"So-sorry, Inuyasha, "Shippou stuttered, nervously looking to Miroku for an encouraging nod. "But I won't take them off…and you might as well stop trying to do it yourself, " he said as Inuyasha pushed as hard as he could with his legs against the boulders, "you know they won't budge until the sutra comes off."
"You rotten little kitsune bastard, GET THESE OFF ME!" he yelled.
"Bwahahahaha!"
Inuyasha glared sideways as he heard Kouga start laughing his ass off. "Shut up, you stupid wolf."
"…hahahahahahahaha…"
"Shut up! Why don't you come over here, you bastard, and see how easy it is to laugh once I kick your teeth in!"
Kouga was on the ground at this point. "….hahahahahah – wheeze – hahahahahaha…."
"Shut the hell up! SHIPPOU! I swear, if you don't let me up now, I am going to KILL you as soon as I get free. KILL. YOU." Shippou's eyes got wide and he took a step towards Inuyasha.
"Don't do it, Shippou." Miroku said quickly, and Inuyasha whipped his head around, trying to see the Monk standing behind him.
"This was your idea, wasn't it? That's what that stupid crap was, your damn wind tunnel! You set me up, you rotten, two-timing, scheming, low-life, pathetic excuse for a houshi! What the hell are you all playing at! LET ME UP!"
During all of this, an amazed Kagome watched with her mouth hanging open. She saw Inuyasha avoid Sango, saw Miroku opened his wind tunnel to target Inuyasha, and was now looking at her poor hanyou trapped face down on the ground. And she couldn't figure out what the heck what was going on. What did they think they were doing? She started to walk over to Inuyasha to set him free when Sango landed in front of her on Kirara and shook her head.
"I don't think you should do that, Kagome."
"What in the world are you all doing? What's going on!"
"Kagome, "Sango said, "if we don't control Inuyasha right now, you know he's going to kill Kouga, right? If you can just warn Kouga not to come around anymore and get him to leave, we can probably end this without blood being spilt. But only as long as Inuyasha stays trapped. Can you do it? Can you warn Kouga so we won't run into this problem again?"
Kagome looked over to Inuyasha, who was still cursing at Miroku and Shippou, and then over to the wolf youkai who was trying desperately to catch his breath now that the laughing had finally subsided. She sighed, nodding…Inuyasha was going to be sooooo pissed. But, maybe this was the best way. She started nodding and turned back to Kouga.
"Um, Kouga?" she asked hesitantly, unsure if he would even be able to hear her over Inuyasha's yelling.
He shook himself from his spot on the ground and grinned at her, bounding up to lean forward intently. "Yes, Kagome?"
"Eh, you might be wondering what all this is about…?"
"Oh, this? "he asked, pointing in Inuyasha's direction. "I don't honestly care. It's about the funniest damn thing I've seen in ages. Anytime you want to beat up that dumbshit, please, feel free!" Kagome frowned at him.
"We're not beating him up, we're trying to save you!" she said irritably. Why'd they always have to be so nasty about each other? "I can't sit him anymore."
"What?" he said, turning his attention back to her from Inuyasha.
"Whenever you've fought in the past, I've always been able to control him and keep you two from killing each other. I can't do that anymore. So…I think maybe it would be better if you were more…cautious about coming near me anymore. It's not safe for you otherwise. Anyway, I've already told you, I'm not your mate, so it won't really change anything, right?"
His eyes turned hard for a moment before he smiled brightly. "So you want this to be my last visit for a while, is that it?"
Kagome nodded. "I'm sorry it has to be that way, but I really think it would be for the best."
Kouga nodded to himself. "Well, I'd better say good bye to idiot boy then, hadn't I?" he said cheerily, and trotted over to Inuyasha. Sango tensed from her position near Kagome, and Miroku walked closer to her, his hand on his mala beads as he watched the two males.
Kouga leaned down and started speaking so quietly that the three humans couldn't hear a word.
"Hey, mutt."
"What the fuck do you want?" Inuyasha growled, glaring up at him.
"I hear Kagome can't plant your ass in the ground anymore…although it looks like a little kid youkai can take you out with no problem. Pretty pathetic."
"Shut the hell up."
"Seems everyone cooked this up to try and give me a last few minutes with Kagome before I take my leave." Kouga added.
Inuyasha glared at him. "Yeah right. I've figured it out already…they just wanna save your sorry ass from Tessaiga for some fucking reason. So why don't you tuck that tail between your legs and take off, unless you wanna be a man about it and take these fucking sutras off so we can have a real fight for once."
"Do you think I'm stupid? I could whip your sorry ass into the next province if it was just you, you puny hanyou, but the sword changes things." He leaned in closer, "Which is why I think this will be the last time you see me." He paused, "It'll be the last time you see Kagome, too, because today's the day she's coming back with me to officially become my mate."
"You stay the hell away from her!" Inuyasha yelled.
"Heh, try and make me, Inuyasha." Kouga taunted. "Oh, I forgot, your friends trapped you like a rat, didn't they?" Shaking his head, he went on, "I admit, it's really tempting to kill you right here and now, you stupid dog, but I think I'm going to enjoy leaving you alive a hell of a lot more. I can take my woman back home with me and you can't do a damn thing to stop me."
Gloating blue orbs glared into furious golden eyes. "Think about that while you're stuck here, you half-breed bastard. Even if you ever get out from under these, even if by some miracle you find our new den, Kagome will already be mine. She'll never be with you again."
"Leave Kagome alone, you bastard! And who do you think you're fooling, anyway? Kagome won't go with you; she's told you that a dozen times, you fucking idiot!"
Kouga smirked and shook his head. "A real man doesn't take no for an answer. You'd know that if you actually had a pair, you effeminate mutt. Don't worry, though, Kagome will realize we were meant for each other after she's spent a few nights in my den…and in my bed. Trust me, I can be very persuasive." He chuckled. "How sad, you've had all this time with her, and you still haven't managed to make her your woman. Your loss, dumbshit." Kouga stood up and headed back towards Kagome.
Inuyasha lost it. "Stay the fuck away from Kagome, you hear me! AAAARRRGH! Shippou, take these off of me, you idiot, he's going to take Kagome! Miroku, Shippou, stop him!" Shippou looked at Inuyasha with scared eyes and ran over to Miroku, but Kouga was almost to Kagome by that point. "Kagome, run! Get away from him!"
Kagome just looked at him. She'd heard him yelling at Kouga while they were talking, not totally unexpected, given their history. But now…Inuyasha was almost foaming at the mouth… "Inuyasha? What?"
Shippou finally reached Miroku, "Miroku! I heard everything…Kouga's going to kidnap Kagome again, he said so! We gotta stop him!" Miroku just patted the Kistune's head, although his features hardened.
"It's all right, Shippou. We planned for this, if you recall. Just calm down and remember to do your part when the time comes, all right?"
"Hey, what are you doing!" Kagome yelled out as Kouga finally reached her and scooped her up in his arms.
"I'm taking my mate home with me, what else?" he said calmly, already turning away from the group.
Kagome's eyes were wide. Not again! She thought he was done with this. "I already told you: I'M NOT YOU'RE MATE! Let me down, Kouga, this isn't funny!"
He looked down at her and she shrank back. His eyes were so…blank. "And I told you, Kagome, that you are. I've given you enough time to get over that stupid puppy, but I'll be damned if I let my own mate tell me to stay away from her so that some damn mongrel can sniff around her all day. I'm not willing to cater to you childish little whims anymore. It's time you grew up and accepted your future, Kagome. You're coming with me. Now. We'll finish mating tonight and then you can forget all about the half-breed."
Every warning Inuyasha had ever given her about Kouga rushed into her head and she cursed herself for ignoring him. But…she'd never thought Kouga would actually…. "Leave me alone, Kouga, I don't want to go with you!" She tried to slap him but he completely ignored her. She turned her head to see Sango and Shippou watching her anxiously, while Miroku simply watched. "Please, guys, help me!" Sango actually wrung her hands and Shippou glared at Miroku, who just smiled.
"Just a moment, Kagome-sama, and we'll be right there." He called out smoothly.
Kouga chuckled again, "I don't think the houshi wants to go up against me, Kagome." He said, and then leaned his head towards her to inhale deeply. "You smell so good. You're going to smell even better after we…" he stopped. Shaking his head sharply, he snorted. "What the… A-A-A-CHOOOOO!" His head smacked down on top of hers.
"Ow!"
"A-A-A-CHOOOOO! A-CHOO! A-CHOO! A-CHOO!" Kouga sneezed so hard that he fell onto his tail and Kagome rolled out of his arms. Miroku helped her up almost before she could figure out she was free.
"There we are." Said Miroku. "Shippou, could you give Kouga a hand? And Kagome, you are unharmed, yes?"
She nodded shakily, "But I don't understand…what's going on? He was acting like he was going to kidnap me again and then… What's happening?"
Miroku smiled. "Wolf's Bane. Uh, it's the other name for the flower bundle around your neck. It has a rather dramatic effect on wolf demons, as you might have noticed. Kaede and I have been researching the subject for some time now."
"You and Kaede made this for me?" at his nod, she looked even more confused, "But how did you know we'd see Kouga? We haven't seen him in weeks!"
Miroku shrugged. "I didn't, but since our travels were taking us right past his territory, I thought the odds were in favor of it. He is fairly consistent where you're concerned, after all." Kagome shuddered and glared over at the still incapacitated wolf.
"ACHOO!ACHOO!ACHOO!ACHOO!" Kouga's eyes were watering, his nose stung like fire, and his forehead was looking bruised as he smacked it into the ground with every thundering sneeze.
Shippou walked over to him. "Here, Kouga, this'll help." Shippou put a small object into both of his hands for him, since the incapacitated wolf youkai still couldn't see a thing. Almost immediately, Kouga's hands were both dragged downwards and trapped on the ground. He howled and pulled at them, but they didn't budge.
"What the fuck did you do to me, you damned brat?" He yelled at Shippou, trying to see him with his still watery eyes.
"HA!" yelled Inuyasha, who was craning his neck to try and see around the rocks over his own hands. "Take that, you mate stealing bastard! HA! Way to go, Shippou! Now C'mon, let me outta here so I can go over and kill his mangy ass!" Inuyasha's fierce smile faded as Shippou remained over by Miroku. "Hey, what're you waiting for? Take these stupid sutras off and let me up!"
"I'm sorry, Inuyasha, but he can't do that just yet." Said Miroku, shrugging slightly. "We really need to wait until Myouga gets back first."
"What! Miroku, just wait until I get outta here, I'm going to kick your ass all the way to the mainland! I'm going to…"
"Get this damn thing off me!" yelled Kouga. "I swear, you are one dead human if you don't take this stupid rock off my hands right now, you sneaky bastard! I'm going to…"
"My, my, my" sighed Miroku, "What a fun afternoon this is going to be."
