Hey everyone, thanks for reading my fic!
The reviews are great and I really appreciate them.
And if you would like to add my myspace, the address is /51997425.
I love adding new friends.
I strongly, STRONGLY encourage you guys to reread chapter 10 of Love me, Don't leave me.
There are a lot of references from that chapter in this one. A lot.
Enjoy this chapter!
I am Here for Good Darling
Chapter 9
Edward ran the tips of his index finger and thumb along the bridge of his nose in an attempt to calm himself down. He tried telling himself that it was to be expected and that she had the right to have a relationship with another man since Edward was considered as good as dead.
"Gottverdammt" He cursed. The German practically slipped out from his lips, but it was to be expected. Cursing in German was often the way that Ed expressed his exasperation the past four years. And he did it often.
Winry and Russell had only kissed, and there was still a good half of the diary to go. Edward's stomach was twisting and the thought of her betrayal swam across his mind. Never had he felt this way. He had never felt jealous.
He was fighting a battle within himself. Part of him felt that he was being selfish and narrow-minded, and there was still Winry's perspective of the story to consider, but the jealous and possessive side was slowly dominating the fight.
Ed looked down at the journal, wondering what other dreadful truths it could hold. What could he gain from reading it besides more jealousy? He could just ask Winry about what happened between the two, but would she be completely honest? Besides that, there was still a good couple of hours before she returned home. The suspense was killing him.
Edward told himself that he would keep calm if he read the remaining pages. But he didn't promise himself anything.
"Mama, lemme wear!" Elizabeth's small hands groped toward her Winry's face as she finished applying her lipstick. The nearly three-year-old was sitting on top of Winry's chiffonier, watching as her mother got ready to go out.
"No, Liz," Winry sighed, "Mama only wears this stuff because Russell likes it. Mama doesn't like it at all."
"Oh," Elizabeth leaned back on her hands and kicked her feet as she watched her mother. "You wook awfully pwetty anyway."
Winry smiled as she watched herself put on her earrings in the mirror. There was a reason she had gotten all dolled up. Tonight was a special occasion. So special, that she even put on the tiny black dress that Russell found in her closet while nosing around. He had said something along the lines of,
"You would look extremely sexy in this. Wear it more often."
That was Russell for you. So straight forward. And cocky. It got annoying sometimes, but Winry knew he could tell when he was being an asshole, because moments later, he would become the most charming man ever. Though it was both sides that attracted her. She had always thought that men needed a backbone, and that they couldn't be that sensitive guy all the time.
Although, at times, she wished that he would have just ended things with her when he figured out who Liz's real father was. That night was terrible, and she couldn't understand why he was so angry at first. He refused to tell her. Obviously he and Ed had been acquainted, some way or another. Probably not on good terms. Russell left that night, but came back the following early morning, drunk, and apologizing. That morning, he confessed that he loved her. She said she loved him too, and he smiled. She didn't mean it. She just felt obligated. It was one of her biggest downfalls with him; She was just too nice to admit the truth. To him. And herself.
"Is auntie Sheska watchin' me tonight?" Liz wrinkled her nose at the thought of Sheska reading her another random book all night long. Who knew what it was going to be tonight? Last week, it was an autobiography of some man who invented the automobile. Exciting.
"No, uncle Fletcher-"
The toddler squealed and threw her hands up, "Maybe we'll do anodder puppet show!" Winry watched as her daughters cheeks turned red with excitement. Liz loved Fletch just as if he were her uncle, but still not as much as Alphonse. It must have been a blood family thing. Still, Winry was grateful that Fletcher agreed to babysit all the time He even refused her payments, and just smiled, saying something about how it's no trouble at all and how easy the job is. He really is a sweet kid.
There was a knock downstairs and Winry let out a low, "Shit", but Liz was too distracted by her excitement to notice. "Liz, go get the door. Mama's not done getting ready."
"Okie-dokie." The tiny blonde girl climbed off the chiffonier and trotted off to go downstairs and toward the front door.
The two brothers had already let themselves in by the time Elizabeth reached the first floor. Winry heard Liz give out a delighted laugh.
After Winry took a few more minutes to get ready, she slipped on her heels and made her way downstairs where she caught Russell red-handed. He was bent down at eye-level to Liz, giving her a chocolate candy bar.
A small wrench flew through the air and clipped Russell right in the temple. He fell over, but then stood up quickly, his back as straight as an arrow.
"Damn, Winry, you just pull those wrenches out of thin air, don't you?" Russell sighed, rubbing the bump on the side of his head. Obviously he had become familiar with the wrath of Winry's wrenches.
"What are you trying to do? Have Liz bouncing of the walls for Fletcher?" Winry scolded as she made her way down the rest of the steps.
"What?" Russell said, innocently. "I can't give my favorite little girl a present?" He said, patting the small blonde on the head.
The mechanic sighed and grabbed her coat before pulling it on. "Lets hurry, we're going to be late."
Liz had already began to drag Fletcher upstairs to play. "We're going to be back late, Fletch," Winry called, "You can sleep in the guest room."
"Alright!" Fletcher called back. She hoped he could handle Liz after she ate a full chocolate bar.
Winry sighed again before looking at Russell, who had a sort of mocking smirk tugging across his lips.
"What?"
"You're aggravated."
"I'm not."
"Are too." Russell made his way toward Winry. "You look gorgeous, gorgeous." He wrapped his arms around her tiny waist and pulled her close.
"We're going to be late." A smile was beginning to fight her way to her lips. He was doing it again. The whole asshole-to-sweetheart-in-just-three-seconds routine. It worked like a charm every time.
"Can't we just stay here?" He asked as he nuzzled his lips into the side of her neck. She shivered.
"No. We were invited to dinner. We just can't change our minds now. It's an expensive place," She said, "Besides, you want to stay here after giving Liz a whole chocolate bar?"
There was a crash up stairs followed by laughing, and then she sound of running footsteps. Then, "Liz! Get down from that shelf, and give me my hat back!" Yeah, they were going to have a lot of fun tonight.
"I guess you're right," Russell sighed, opening the door to let Winry through. As the two walked down the pathway to the main road, he added, "It would also be hard to have alone time."
Winry flushed with his blunt statement. "What makes you think we'll be doing that tonight?"
"Because," Russell started as he wrapped his hand around Winry's, "It's our half-year anniversary."
Winry swallowed. It was true. It had been half-a-year since their first date, and she had barely let Russell lay a finger on her. She kept telling him that she wanted to wait, and he would always be disappointed, but say at the same time, "You're worth the wait." She didn't know what she she was being so conservative about. He was handsome and sweet, and they had been together for a long time. He had been completely loyal to her. But there was something that made her reluctant. Some sort of mental block.
Deep down, she knew what it was.
"You know, you can't win her over with chocolate."
"What?" Russell looked over at her.
"You can't always use materialistic things to get her to win her over."
"I just want her to like me."
"She does like you. You just have to give it time."
As much as she hated it, Winry kept her and Russell's relationship a secret to her daughter. She didn't want to confuse her. Though, she knew a time would come when Liz would ask about her real father. Her friends around her had two parents. Not a mother with a "special friend".
The couple didn't speak much as they reached the restaurant. It was packed, but not chaotic. It was a pretty ritzy place after all. The most expensive place in Central. Everyone in the building had to have been in the military, and pretty high up. It was such a grand occasion. Roy Mustang had been campaigning for Fuhrer, and he was at the top of the poles. It was an exciting time, indeed.
"Nice place," Russell remarked as the young couple made their way to the large table where Mustang was seated.
"It is," Winry responded, "I don't think I've ever been here-"
"Edward, I'm...in love with you."
Winry halted, her heals clicking hard against the floor.
This place...
"Something wrong, sergeant?" Roy Mustang's voice said from their assigned table.
"Something wrong, Fullmetal?"
Yes, this place was familiar. Winry looked over to the ballroom floor. Her and Ed once danced there. She told him she loved him for the first time there.
"Winry?" Russell asked, stepping in front of her reminiscent gaze. "What's up?"
She looked at him, and then hesitated before answering, "N-nothing. Let's sit down."
After everyone ate their delicious, yet terribly expensive dinners, Roy mustang began to make a speech. There were camera lights flashing from all different directions and she spotted a video camera recording the whole thing. She had never seen one in real life before. This moment could very well go down in history. At the end of his speech, Roy made a long list of people he would like to thank. Winry among them.
And then...
"I would also like to give out a very special thank you to someone. Without this person, the military would still be in corruption and I would not be granted such a wonderful opportunity. He taught us so many valuable life lessons. He taught us to cherish what we have and protect what made us human. He changed Amestris for the better," Roy held up his wine glass and Winry could have swore that she saw Roy glance at her.
"No fuckin' way," Russell muttered under his breath as he lifted up his glass.
"Here's to Edward Elric. May his soul rest in peace."
She didn't have a choice. Slowly, she lifted up her glass, as did everyone else, and took a small sip that was difficult to swallow.
Protect what made us human.
Her heart was fluttering. She wanted to cry. She didn't want Russell next to her.
Winry waited another hour before asking Russell if they could leave. She didn't want to make it obvious that Mustang's speech upset her by leaving so soon.
"Oh, c'mon, you're not tired all ready?"
His voice was so clear in her head. She could even remember what he felt like when he kissed her that night. His hands on her hips. The exhaustion and the excitement.
She wanted to feel it again. So bad. But she would never get it. Never ever. No matter how much she prayed. No matter how much her heart twisted.
He was gone.
"Why are you walking so fast?" Russell asked trying to keep up with her pace.
Winry turned to him. To Russell. She realized it now. Why she continued to stay with him. Russell was a cover-up. He took her thoughts away from Edward.
He was just some half-ass replacement.
But she needed him. To stay sane.
All the lights were off inside of the large house. Russell reached the door first and Winry followed quickly behind. Before the tall man could open the door, Winry wrapped her arms around his waist from behind.
He quickly turned to her, and she kissed him without warning. It was a hotly passionate kiss that practically screamed lust at him. So hungry. So desperate.
Russell didn't object, of course.
It was hard for them to make their way to the bedroom while trying to stay silent and take their clothes off at the same time. He would push her up against the wall as he slid the thin straps to her little, black dress off her shoulders. Russell's lips and teeth attacked her neck and Winry panted heavily as she struggled with unbuckling his belt.
By the time the two reached Winry's bed, Russell was kicking off his pants and clad in only his boxers and her in her undergarments. Winry pulled him down on top of her.
"Wh-what are...you..."
She heard his voice again. And she kissed Russell harder. How could she be thinking about him at a time like this?
"Oh god..."
Winry pressed her hips against his impatiently, causing Russell to let out a low groan and bite her neck.
Breathlessly, he said, "Marry me, Winry."
"SONOFABITCH" Edward roared, his teeth clenched and his face heated. He couldn't even look beyond that line,
He asked me to marry him right then and there.
Did he really want to continue reading? Did he really want to find out what happened that night?
...Did she say yes?
Russell didn't give her enough time to respond, he had slid one hand beneath her panties and another under her bra. His fingers were working quickly and her mind was flooded with pleasure.
Still, his question still lingered there. Marry Russell? No, she couldn't. No way. She would be committing to the hugest lie ever. But what else would their relationship lead to? She would just be leading him on.
His fingers were now moving in and out of her rapidly, his mouth on her uncovered breast.
"Nnn," She moaned, feeling her climax creeping up as she threw her head back.
She was completely lost in this false ecstasy. Her mind blending with what was real and not. Where was she? She was with Russell? But why? She was only kidding herself. There was only one man for her. Dead or not.
"Edward!" She moaned as she felt her pleasure reach it's peak.
It happened so quickly, like a blur. One moment she was laying in her bed, trying to recuperate from her orgasm, the next she was crying, pleading Russell to come back to bed with her.
"Russell, it's n-not what you,"
"I know what I heard, Winry." He said quickly, throwing his shirt back on.
"Please don't go, please. We can...we can do whatever you want. Please, Russell."
"You know, Winry," Russell said, turning sharply to the crying blonde, "It's hard to make love to someone when they're still in love with someone else." He put a hand up to his forehead and chuckled slightly. "I can't believe I was being fooled this whole time. I can't believe I told you I loved you. I asked you to marry me for Christ sakes. I should have saw this coming."
Russell waited for her to say something, but she didn't. She had betrayed Russell. She betrayed herself. She betrayed Ed. Winry was a mess.
"I'm leaving," He said as he pulled open the door and walked through.
"Wait, come back..." She said in barely a whisper. "Don't leave me too..."
Edward shut the book suddenly, the sound of Winry's heels coming up the stairs.
"Edward?" She heard her voice say before she began turning the knob.
For some reason, hearing her voice right then really pissed him off. Was she going to keep this a secret from him forever? When was she planning on telling him this? What the hell was she thinking when she was with Russel?
"Hey there," She said joyfully as she opened the door. "What have you been...up...What's wrong...?" Winry inquired upon seeing Ed's furious face. She let out a yelp as he threw the small book in his hand at the wall beside her, causing it to make a thunderous noise. Winry looked down at her journal that now laid at her feet. "Wh-what..."
"When the hell were you planning on telling me, Winry? Huh?" He rasped, his eyes glaring knives into her. "When were you planning on telling me that you were fooling around with that bastard, Tringham, while I was gone?"
Her heard began to beat rapidly. He had never been so angry at her, and to be honest...
it was terrifying.
It was like he was looking into the eyes of one of his enemies.
"Edward, let me explain..."
"You don't need to explain anything." He growled, grabbing his coat and throwing it on. "I don't want to hear the story twice. I'll be sick."
"Edward, will you just listen?" She pleaded as he walked by her and out of the bedroom. "I never stopped thinking about you!" Winry already had streams of tears trickling down her cheeks.
"You stayed with him anyway."
"Why would you read my diary Ed? I thought you were better than that." She kept a distance as she followed him downstairs.
"I would have never learned the truth. Or I would have never known the whole story."
Winry stopped at the last stair once he said that, and he turned to her.
"Are you saying that I would lie to you, Ed?"
"You lied to him. For a long ass time, Winry."
"Don't you do that Edward. Don't you compare yourself to him." She said, grinding her teeth together. "You never listen. You never hear anyone else's side to the story."
Edward ducked once he saw the wrench flying at his head. It missed. Barely.
"Why don't you continue then. You were about to leave weren't you? Then go!" She said, picking up another wrench. "Get the fuck out!" She flung the mechanical tool at his head. Followed by a screw driver, and Ed was out the door by the time she had picked up her saw.
Edward slammed the door behind him and leaned against it, standing there in silence for a moment. And then he heard a whimper and slowly cracked open the door.
She was collapsed on her knees now, her face buried into her palms as she sobbed. "Disgusting," She whimpered. "So disgusting. I'm disgusting." She repeated over and over again.
So maybe now he was feeling like he took things a little too far. But Winry coming home so soon didn't give him a chance to calm down and organize his thoughts.
What should I do now? He asked himself as she made his way toward the main street. Risembool was probably the best option for now. Besides, Al's birthday was in about a week. He suspected there would be a lot of familiar faces there.
He had a week.
A week to decide what I'm going to do.
Elizabeth bounced up the stairs to the front door and opened it. "Hello!" She exclaimed happily before seeing her mother sitting on the floor, holding her knees, her eyes swollen.
"Mama!" The toddler said quickly as she dropped her book bag and made her way toward Winry. "What's wrong? Are you hurting somewhere?" Once her daughter embraced her, Winry couldn't help but start crying once again.
"Yeah, Liz, Mama's hurting." Winry's voice cracked, hugging her child back tightly, tears building up in her eyes again.
Liz kissed Winry's cheek. "There. A kiss to make it all better, like you do for me." She said with a smile and Winry sniffled.
"Thanks Elizabeth." It did help a little bit to see her daughters smiling face. She had his smile, though.
"Where's mister Edward?" Liz asked.
"He left."
"Why?"
"Because," Winry sniffled. "He doesn't like Mama very much anymore."
"Whaaat?" Liz huffed. "That's dumb. Who couldn't like my mama?"
Winry smiled and stroked the top of Liz's head.
I could name two people.
Thanks for reading. I wrote a longer chapter since it took me so long to update.
I hope you enjoyed it.
Don't be shy to review and tell me what you thought!
I really enjoy reading them! They're what keep me updating faster.
Thanks,
Amber
