Right, so here are the next two chapters! I'm doing pretty well so far with my promise to myself of at least one upload a week. I'm about half way through writing the final chapter (19) so you guys should have it all by the end of Easter break, (4 weeks from now). I warn you again though that I make no promises of a sequel (even if I do very much want to write one) and there will be some questions unanswered.

Thank you bunches to my reviewers! You always manage to make me laugh or blush with unexpected pride. Kisses!

NINE

"So let me get this straight; you went through the Omega relay, defeated the Collectors, killed a human Reaper and returned with all your crew. Then you killed the Shadow Broker and destroyed the Batarian home world, revived a Prothean soldier, recruited the rachni, again, cured the Genophage, united the Krogans and Turians, stopped a war between the Quarians and Geth who now share their homeworld on Rannoch, recruited the last surviving descendants of the Reapers' creators, destroyed Cerberus and you now have sole control of the entire Reaper army. Does that about sum it up?" Miranda asked incredulously.

"Give or take a few minor points," Shepard confirmed as she began to wonder how she was going to get Miranda away from her mission logs and keep her promise to the doctor.

They were sitting on the couches, surrounded by data-pads, that the Commander had downloaded from Miranda's and her own unclassified reports, for easier reading.

The first thing they had discussed was Oriana's safety and thankfully, before her injury, Miranda had confided in the Commander that though there had been no safe place during the war, and Oriana had chosen to stay on Earth to assist with evacuations, they could be fairly confident that her work with the numerous refugees was keeping her out of harm's way. This piece of news had brought a reluctant smile to the XO's features and took some of the tension from her shoulders.

Since then though, the rest of the reports from their struggles against the Reapers had been tough reading. Sanctuary in particular had been a difficult read for Miranda. Though she seemed relieved to discover that her father couldn't chase her or her sister any longer, the guilt that she'd dealt with since leaving the black ops group was hitting her as hard as it had the first time round; after reading the casualty reports there had been almost ten minutes of silent inactivity while she attempted to process how her past involvement had contributed to The Illusive Man's eventual strength.

The rest of the reports that Shepard had picked out, while horrific in their own rights, hadn't given the Operative the same cause to feel ashamed. Though she couldn't help but wonder where she'd been and what she'd been doing while Shepard was out saving the galaxy.

"It's a lot to take in, I know," the Commander commented after a minute's silence.

Miranda ignored her. "You said I'd be able to access all of my files through your console. Where are my personal files?"

Shepard looked at her for a long moment, gauging just how tired she must be. "They're on a separate server," she confessed eventually.

"So I can't actually access everything from your cabin," the brunette accused. "Why lie to me? What are you hiding?"

"Miranda," Jane began, keeping her voice calm. "You've been my second in command; you brought me back from the dead and we kept each other alive through months of chasing Collectors and dodging bullets. You're my friend; I trust you." She let that sink in through the other woman's hard exterior before coming to her point. "I like to think I know you quite well. Some of the changes you've made in the last couple of years had to be seen to be believed and after everything you've already read tonight you really need to take a long break before diving into your own thoughts."

The XO huffed to demonstrate her annoyance and impatience, but mostly to hide the surprise she felt at being called someone's friend. Niket had been her only real friend, and even then they were hardly that close. "Fine," she relented after a lengthy pause. She looked back at the data pads and sifted all the new knowledge she'd acquired through her thoughts. It was a hell of a lot to process, but her mind handled it with relative ease. "I'll take a break, but then I want to see my logs."

Shepard looked at the chronometer and wondered for a moment how Liara was keeping herself busy while she waited. "You have a cabin on the Cornucopia, but I've asked the crew to move your things into the captain's quarters as I'll be staying on the Normandy. When I'm happy that you're well rested I'll give you access to everything you need." She grinned at the scowl that appeared at her orders, not bothering to hide how unaffected she was by Miranda's stern demeanour. "I'm going to ask EDI to lock you out of the ship's systems until you're rested, so I suggest you get a good night's sleep. It's for your own good," she added on seeing the XO's look of betrayal.

The walk through the Normandy to the shuttle that was waiting outside was an anxious one for Jane. She had called ahead to let Chakwas and Liara know what she was doing, so she was fairly certain that Jack would be out of the way, but there was always the off chance that the unpredictable biotic would catch on to their interference and demand to know what was going on. She knew she couldn't keep Miranda's state of awareness quiet for much longer, but she really just wanted the XO out of earshot before she discussed the situation with Jack.

No one could have predicted that the two stubborn biotics would form a romantic bond, least of all their Commander, who more than once had had to step between their fights. It still surprised Shepard how happy they were when they were together and she was determined to do everything in her power not to ruin the potential for a real relationship between them. Which meant keeping them apart until Miranda was in a better position to accept the huge changes in her lifestyle.


Liara sighed as she watched the shuttle rise into the air, imagining Miranda and Jane inside. Once again she was being unintentionally pushed aside while her lover was called upon to sort out other people's problems. It would be another couple of hours at least before the shuttle returned, dropping off an ever increasingly tired Commander; just in time for the celebrations to end and the crew to begin returning to their respective quarters.

It was just past midnight and most of the children had already been escorted reluctantly back to their rooms, exhausted but exhilarated after the fun and games of the afternoon. The only two who remained were sat beside the fire, on either side of Jack, morbidly sharing horror stories of what they were now all calling Cerberus Summer Camp.

Jack was chuckling at her companions' attempts to horrify her with their torturous experiences. Both teens had been hand-picked by the doctors at the age of eight, and while they had tried to put aside the happy childhoods they had lived before their capture, they each held memories of a normal existence. Jack had been plucked straight from the crib and thrown into the madness that had become her life; fighting, killing… surviving. No bedtime stories, no one there to pick her up when she fell or hold her when she was scared; no mother, no father, no friends… no love. These teens could not begin to comprehend her nightmares.

Still, she let them talk. She knocked them down when they got too big headed, and built them up when they struggled to speak. It was just beginning to dawn on her how much of a lifeline she was becoming to these kids. She had found a sense of pride while working with the Alliance, moulding her students into kick-ass warriors and dragging them through the fight. She would never have considered herself to be big on talking when it came to problem solving, but in their current situation it flowed from her naturally and even satisfied some of her own demons.

When Shepard had asked her to be available to the kids if they were willing to open up to her she'd wanted to flat out refuse. Since when did she look like a shrink? But the great and wonderful Commander had cajoled, pleaded and finally bribed the ex-con with a shiny new gun and much to Jack's surprise she found another thing she was good at.

These kids didn't need someone telling them that everything would be alright if they just opened up about their living nightmare, that the pain would go away, or that they were not to blame for their actions. They didn't need platitudes. But to have someone who'd been where they were listening to them; someone who'd experienced their hell, and was living to tell the tale? She was living proof that they could survive, and at the very least proof that they could have the potential to be happy.

Most of the kids had sought her out over the course of the day to ask her about one thing or another, though the mousy-haired waif who'd clung to her that first day aboard the Normandy, never uttered a word.

She was somewhat of a mystery. They could find no record of her from the Cerberus labs and none of the children knew her real name; they had affectionately named her 'Mute'.

Mute was fast becoming Jack's shadow. She was there whenever the young woman turned around; always watching, but only ever approaching when Jack wasn't surrounded by others. Even then she only sat quietly by, letting the mystified adult attempt a one-sided conversation in an effort to draw her out.

Jack wondered occasionally what any other person in her situation would think. It occurred to her that most others would be highly concerned by such unusual behaviour, but she just figured that the kid was doing what she was doing to feel safe. If Mute was happy keeping her thoughts to herself it certainly wasn't going to bother her; it made a nice change to be accompanied by someone who didn't feel the need to fill every silence with mindless chatter. The kid would talk eventually if she wanted to and in the meantime there were lots of other ways to communicate if you knew what to look for.

While they'd been training earlier that day Mute had shown that she had a lot of power, though it was as yet uncontrolled. When everyone was watching during her turn, it had shot from her fingers in all directions, making almost everyone run for cover. At one point though, when Harry had accidentally sent a crate flying towards the Commander, who's back had been turned at the time, she had flung out a hand without thought and sent the heavy object soaring a couple of hundred yards before it collided solidly with a tree. The sudden attention that landed upon her sent her into cover behind her long fringe, but as a babble of awe broke around the groups Jack had spied a tiny smile forming at the corner of her mouth.

Breaking from her reverie she focussed again on the teens on either side of her. The fifteen year old was called Annabelle, or Anne if you didn't want your head bitten off. The girl hardly every relaxed; every few minutes she checked her surroundings and she twitched constantly, her head moving toward various noises, seemingly without her conscious thought. She was short, but wiry and had many tales of squeezing through tight spaces to escape pursuit; even before her capture by Cerberus she'd lived her life on the run. While she'd never wanted for food or shelter, her father had been a very successful Red-Sand dealer and running from the law had become second nature to her and her four brothers. It was while protecting them from a rival gang that she'd attracted unwanted attention for her biotic talents.

Heinrich had similar appellation issues and wouldn't answer to anything but Rik (though Jack had once overheard Ann calling him Heiny and he'd simply rolled his eyes fondly at her). He was approaching seventeen and had naturally taken command of the lab kids. Jack remembered Shepard commenting that he looked like he'd make a fine soldier and made a note to suggest that he take on more of a leadership role during the training.

Rik's origins were far less exciting; his parents had owned a bakery. His mother, he'd recalled, would get up at four-thirty every morning to prepare the dough and the bread would have risen before either he or his twin had even begun to stir. His father on the other hand excelled at pastries and cakes. Most days he would hold a little of the produce back at the end of the day as a treat for after tea.

Neither teen spoke much about their families, but Jack knew that they had to be wondering what had become of them.

"So guys," Jack threw another stone into the fire and watched how the flames engulfed it. "You thought much about what you wanna do when we get back to Earth?" She picked up a long stick for poking the fire with while she let her words sink in. "I hear there's plenty of refugee housing being set up. Shepard's gonna do what she can to find all of your families, but if you two really wanted to make it on your own she wouldn't stop you."

"She wouldn't?" Anne prodded, unbelieving.

Jack chuckled. "I ain't sayin' she wouldn't talk your ear off to get you to change your minds, but she knows you're both old enough to make your own choices."

"What would you do?" Rik wondered aloud while he too poked at the fire with a stick. The way the pair of them had decided to try and emulate Jack was a source of constant humour for her.

"Me…? Few years back I probably would have hijacked the nearest shuttle and maybe tried to take control of the Cornucopia before anyone was the wiser. Not a great idea to fly into Alliance space with a stolen ship though, so I'd have sold it to the first pirates I found and stowed away on any ship so long as it was headed far away from the scum we found here." She tilted her head and closed her eyes to picture for a moment the tight space she'd hidden in during her exodus from Pragia. "Now? Since the war is over, joining the Alliance isn't such a bad prospect. Don't have to worry 'bout a bed or food; got work, pay and people who'll watch your back. Lot of volunteers needed of course; Earth is looking like even more of a shit hole than usual."

"Kinda big on rules though ain't they." Anne interjected.

"Yeah, most of the officers have a big ol' stick up their collective butt." Jack agreed with a slight sneer. "The front line grunts are just like you and me though… mostly." She glanced round at the pair and the thoughtful expressions on their faces. "Hey, I'm not tryin' to persuade you into nothin'. I was runnin' on my own for a helluva long time; most people I came across were assholes who'd sooner use you and lose you. Then I met Shepard and the soft-hearted pussy actually gave me a reason to trust someone again. So yeah, if you got nowhere else to go, the Alliance ain't so bad is all I'm sayin'."

Before either teen could respond to that they were interrupted by Private Hills who'd come to advise them to get some sleep.

Rik and Anne both groaned at the idea of cutting the evening short, even though they were approaching the early hours of the morning. Hills looked to Jack to help him out, but she just laughed.

"I'm not their mommy. Get Shepard to haul their asses in if she wants them to sleep. I'll have fun drillin' them into the ground tomorrow when they can't even open their eyes!" She chucked all the louder at Hills's concerned features. Didn't he get reverse psychology? "Hell I've never had the chance to throw a bucket of ICE-cold water over anyone before. Let them stay!"

"Er, that's ok," Rik conceded, beginning to stand up and offering Anne a hand up. "We wanna be our best tomorrow, don't we?"

"Sure," Anne agreed, rolling her eyes at him, though she could quite believe that their crazy teacher would make good on everything she said. "See you in the morning Jack."

"Yeah, see ya," she waved her burnt stick at them and winked at the retreating soldier, chuckling again as his face flushed.

Yeah, it was a pretty fine feeling being one of the good guys, though she was determined that no one would think of her as soft. Not like Shepard. The brash biotic would have spent most of her time contemplating the change her life was taking if it wasn't for the concerns she had for her incapacitated lover.

The longer she spent without the other woman's company, the more she began to realise just how much time they had spent together. Not just for sex either, she realised with a certain qualm; they were together when prepping for missions, when Miranda was seeing to all the little things that kept the ship running smoothly, or when they were just sitting together in the same room while Jack stared at the ceiling.

She chuckled quietly and shook her head. "Fuckin' pussy," she muttered to herself.

"Do I need to get the swear-jar, Jack?"

The Commander's amused voice broke through her thoughts and brought a wry smile to the ex-con's face. Jack looked up to find Shepard and Liara hovering over her, the former with her arms wrapped tightly around the asari's waist. She steadfastly ignored the twinge of envy that flickered at the back of her thoughts.

"Fuck you Shepard," Jack continued to chuckle to herself as the couple got settled on an adjacent log.

"That's what she has me for," Liara announced, eliciting a shocked squeak from the Commander and a delighted guffaw from Jack.

"Spending time with your dad has done you good," Jack told the asari emphatically. The laughter quickly died down though as the Commander's serious demeanour settled over them. "Jesus Shepard, way to kill the buzz. What's got your panties all bunched up," she paused for all of two seconds before adding, "Besides Liara?"

Jane gave a half-hearted smile before becoming serious again. "Jack… I had a call from the doc earlier."

The biotic's body stiffened instantly. There was a moment of palpable tension before she spoke. "She's not…?"

"No," Shepard reassured her quickly and watched as Jack's posture relaxed ever so slightly. "She's awake, and she's been giving the doc the run around-"

"And you didn't bother to call me?" She was half standing, her sudden anger smothering the moment of panic she'd felt at the beginning of their conversation.

"Jack…? Jack…! She doesn't remember!" Jane shouted after giving several commands to stop.

Jack was several feet away, steadfastly ignoring the Commander until Shepard's last attempt to reach her broke through. A shiver of fear ran down her spine as she tried to figure out what those words meant for her future. Slowly she turned to face the compassionate expressions that were directed at her. "What do you mean? What doesn't she remember?"

"She doesn't remember anything after I helped you destroy the Teltin facility on Pragia." Shepard paused, hesitating as she hoped that the unpredictable young woman could hold herself together and not do anything rash. "She remembers the fight you had in her office; when she woke up she said she remembered you hitting her. She thought that was why she was injured."

How many months had she and Miranda bickered and danced around one another until circumstance and post battle euphoria had brought them together in a clashing of teeth and grasping of flesh? If not for that incident Jack had no doubt that they would never have considered agreeing to a cessation of hostilities if only so they could use one another for stress relief. Then without conscious thought they'd each gained a mutual respect for the other, which had finally evolved into a burgeoning friendship. What were the chances that they would ever be able to repeat those opportune moments?

Jack paced, taking deep breaths, clenching and unclenching her fists; anything to calm the river of lava that was the unfairness in the train of thought that ran through her mind.

Jane decided to keep talking, explaining how she'd spent the best part of the evening helping the XO to go through the mission logs and bring her up to speed, and how tomorrow they would begin on her personal logs.

"I have no idea what's written in those files. Did she ever mention writing about you in her logs?"

"How the fuck should I know? I didn't stand around readin' over her shoulder. God damn it Shepard!" Jack scratched her head in frustration. "This is all your damn fault you know!"

Shepard raised an eyebrow, but it was her lover who took offence. "That's not fair Jack. Shepard's spent hours trying to sort this mess out -" she stopped at the feel of Jane's hand on her waist, her indignation coming to an abrupt halt.

The Commander had an idea that her volatile friend wasn't simply talking about the current situation, but the fact that she'd let herself get into this place where she was hurting because she'd chosen to open herself up to caring about someone again. "Do you really regret who you've become Jack?" The agitated woman shot her a dirty look without responding. "Can't say I agree with her taste, but Miranda obviously found something about you to like."

"Piss off," came the reply, though the insult was tempered by the reluctant smirk that accompanied it.

"That was before you became such a charmer too," Shepard added with an answering smirk.

"Urgh! You're so damn annoying you know that!" Tattooed hands were thrown up in the air as she finally stopped her agitated pacing.

"Does that mean you know I'm right?" A snort of derision was her only response. "Jack," Shepard began again, softening her tone. "The memory loss might not be permanent. Karin seems to think that your fight was the trigger for where her memories have 'rebooted'. It would explain why she remembers you throwing her when you only threw a chair at her before."

Jack sucked at her teeth as she digested this then gave a humourless laugh. "None of this paints me in a good light, does it? Bet you'd never dream of doing anything like that to Blue would ya; you big Girl Scout."

Shepard frowned at the comparison but didn't bother to disagree.

"She's given me a few bruises in her sleep," Liara confessed with a small conciliatory smile.

"And a few hickeys," Jane added. "I have no doubt that Miranda would give you a run for your money if she thought you deserved it."

"Yeah I guess," Subject Zero shuffled her feet, looking lost now most of the fight had been talked out of her. "So, I suppose you're gonna tell me to stay out of her way for a while huh?"

"Maybe for a day," the Commander agreed. "Though I think you'd both be better off just working together and seeing how it goes; you're going to bitch at each other no matter what."

"True enough… So where is she?"

"Back on the Cornucopia."

"Right," Jack replied non-committal. She looked off into the distance for a moment, appearing to think.

Did she really have a chance to win Miranda over again, or was Shepard just being her usual 'half full' self? Well, whatever the answer, she knew she'd already committed herself to not giving the other woman up. She'd grown too used to the way the other biotic touched her and challenged her. She'd be damned if she let some other asshole take her place without a fight!

Her attention focussed back on Shepard, a new aura of determination surrounding her. "Guess I'd better get my beauty sleep then, if I'm gonna be fuckin' Casanova tomorrow." She turned on her heel and marched toward the ship, leaving a dumb-founded asari and Commander in her wake.