I ran. I dropped the book and ran. Somehow my mind knew where to go, and I navigated the sidewalks without even thinking about it. With those memories came more, as if a barrier had finally been broken. They played in my mind, as if I were watching a home movie. I was nine, I felt embarrassment flood my cheeks as I went to kick a kickball but missed. I was eighteen, feeling a surge of pride as I took my diploma. I was twenty-two, I cried when I found out my friend, Christine, had been mugged and murdered in the streets. I was twenty-three, anger flooded face as I fought with my father about my career choice. The last was a recent one. I felt utter desperation as I looked over files, trying desperately to figure out where my sister was. Mal said something I couldn't quite remember, and I hugged him as he tried to comfort me…
The next thing I knew I was knocking on the door sharply, not caring how late it was. Not caring that people stared at me, looking strangely at my odd appearance. It took a moment until Mal opened the door, and I didn't even give him a chance to see who I was before I threw my arms around him. I needed to be sure this person was real, that he was still here. That the same person that I had hugged, however long ago that was, was the same person who stood here today.
"I'm sorry" I whispered. I truly felt bad for how I had gotten angry at him earlier. He was only trying to help, and there wasn't much he could do. He still seemed shocked at my sudden appearance, but after a moment I felt him hug me back.
"You have nothing to apologize for".
"Have you ever hear of the red thread?" Amy asked.
I had been a few weeks since I had gotten my memory back. A few things were still hazy, mainly details and things that happened within a few days of when I got shot, but I had most of them back. I was sitting down in the crime lab with Amy. I was allowed to come back to work, but I was put on desk duty as my short-term memory was still foggy.
I shook my head "Never". As I did this I could feel the short growth of hair behind me move. My hair was growing out again, it was almost as long as Amy's. I liked it. Not because of how it looked, but because it was the first sign that things were returning to normal.
"When I was little, my mother used to tell me that people who were meant to be together were connected to a red thread. That it may be tangled, but it will never break".
I smiled slightly, I could see where she was getting at. Mal and I, although it was unspoken, were pretty much dating. I had been a little wary of the idea, but I realized Mal wouldn't have done all those things for me if he didn't love me. And when I realized that…it just sort of happened. I realized that Mal had fallen in love with someone named Natara Williams, and that she was still here. It made me think of how different things could have turned out, how the slightest change could have meant this would have never happened. What if I hadn't shot Shawn in Miami? What if he hadn't lived when Mal shot him and he fell off that roof? From the open door I could hear a laugh, and it sounded like it came from Mal. He must have just come back. It was a recent change, but laughter had returned to the station. Mal said it had disappeared when Ken and I died, but when people realized I was alive I almost became a symbol of hope. That even if you lose everything, like I did, life goes on.
I could remember Ken now, even remember how he had died, although that was still fuzzy. Ignoring the further distraction of Mal's familiar voice, I looked back to Amy. It surprised me to see how she held Ken's badge, which had been given to Ken's mother, then given to Amy, in her hand. I think Ken's mother let her have it to her so she had something to hold onto, but this was the first I saw it other than on her desk.
"Did it hurt?" she asked, noticing how I had looked back at her. "Did it hurt when you died?".
In truth, the memory I had of seeing Mal just before my operation was the only one I had of that day. But I supposed that was when my heart had stopped beating for those few precious moments, when I had touched death. I could remember the agony of the ringing of my ears, the pain in my head and the fear that ran through me mind. But when I thought of that moment, that second just before I let go, there was only one word that came to mind. Peace. "No" I answered after a moment "it's easier than falling asleep, and you don't even know it's happening. It's only what happens before you die that is painful".
I looked at how she was held the badge. It was cupped in her hand, as if she were holding an injured baby bird. I realized why she had asked me if I believed in the red thread. Maybe she didn't really believe in it, but it was all she had. Because it meant that if it was true, maybe and Mal and I were connected. And that meant maybe she and Ken were connected. I put my hand under hers and pressed her fingers to the cold metal.
"You'll see him again" I whispered.
"You think so?".
I ran a quick hand through my hair, where I could feel the now-smooth scar as my hand brushed my temple. "I think everyone gets a second chance".
Yes, this is the end. Thanks to everyone who reviewed! Replies:
Oryt: Thanks! :) I'm really touched. :) put three smily faces just because your review made my day? Heck yes! :D
mozzi-girl: Thanks a lot :)
So, I want to know which of these two fanfic's you want first. Haunted (a kind of spooky one. It'll be about a supposedly 'haunted' building that may turn out to be haunted after all…) or Evil Angel (A sad, yet romantic fanfic like this one. It'll be about eternal love, even after death). I will do both eventually, and promise I will eventually do Masquerade (which I've had several requests about). I'm still working out the plot holes with it, but will try and start it soon. So if you could tell me whether you want to see Haunted or Evil Angel that would be great!
Thanks for reading!
—A
