AN: I really wanted an angsty one so here it is! I feel like I did a good job with this one! Please review and tell me what you think!

When Roy walked into the door, his little blonde lover was sleeping on the couch. He wore a pair of jeans and a black long sleeve shirt. He was snoring so quietly you could barely hear it. His eye lids would flutter every now and again or maybe his nose would twitch. Roy smiled tossing his coat on the rack and removing his uniform top. He rolled up his white button down sleeves and strode quietly over to the couch.

He sat down gently next to the teen and examined his peaceful face for another moment.

"Edward," he whispered softly. He ran his callused hand over the blondes tan jaw and his eyes tightened. Brilliant gold pools popped open and blinked a few times. Mismatched hands went up to rub at his sleepy eyes. He sat up slowly, Roy's hand on his waist and he yawned silently.

"When did you get home?" he asked sniffling. He had had a cold for the past week.

"About 2 minutes ago, you tired?" Roy asked gently. He leaned over and placed a soft kiss on his little alchemist's lips. Ed smiled pulling away and nodded.

"You must be too, with all of your work."

Roy just chuckled and kissed his cheek. He pushed him back on the couch and ran his hands up the younger's chest.

"You know I love you right?"

Edward blinked, propping himself up on his elbows to look the man in his eyes.

"Of course I do, what sort of question is that?"

Roy just chuckled into the nape of Edward's soft skinned neck and kissed it lightly. He said nothing and continued to nip and kiss at the teen's neck.

"Let's go to bed alright?" Roy asked. Ed nodded getting up slowly, but Roy stopped him and picked him up bridal style. Ed was going to protest but he sneezed and coughed. Roy held him tighter and brought him down the hallway. He laid the teen down on the bed and crawled on top of him.

"Roy?" Ed asked quietly.

"Yes?" Roy asked as he slid of Ed's shirt. He worked on Edward's belt and then tossed it on the floor.

"Is something wrong?"

Roy was quiet as he pulled off the teens jeans. He kicked off his own heavy boots and socks and pulled the teen close to him.

"Roy?"

Roy was shaking and Edward was getting scared. He held the teen closer to his body and took in a shaky breath.

"Answer me damn it! What's wrong?" Ed cried hoarsely. Roy lifted his head and Ed saw he looked pale and stressed.

"I- I just love you Ed, and I never want to let you go," he murmured. Edward blinked and snuggled into his chest deeper.

"Roy, I know that's not the reason why you're behaving this way."

"No, n-no its not," Roy murmured sitting up. Ed sat up slowly and waited with expectant eyes.

Roy looked away and played with bed sheets. He let out a heavy sigh and swallowed before speaking in a low voice.

"I, I was drafted, for the war, Ed."

Edward's golden eyes widened and his older lover continued.

"In my meeting, they told me. I couldn't tell them no, and I knew telling you would be hard, and I, didn't know how to tell you," Roy said, his voice wavering in and out.

Edward hopped off the bed and crossed his arms as he paced. Roy frowned watching the gears practically turn in his lovers mind.

"You can, no that wouldn't work. Maybe you can get sick! I can break your arm and then you couldn't…. No I wouldn't hurt you on purpose." Edward continued to spew out useless ideas and Roy watched as a small sad grin grew on his pale face.

He got up and strode over to the ranting teen and stopped him mid pace, and hugged him.

Tears streamed down Edwards face and his sobs were muffled by the soft cotton of Roy's button down.

"There has to be a way!" Edward sobbed into his chest. His body shook and his sobs grew louder, into cries of agony.

"You can't go! I can't lose you! This isn't fair!"

Roy tightened his arms around his small lover listening to his pain filled shrieks.

"Everybody's leaving me. Roy, you know the chances of coming back alive!" Ed moaned as tears dampened Roy's shirt.

"Edward, please. Please stop crying. I know it's hard, but please don't ever think I'm leaving you," Roy snapped picking him up. He sat down on the bed with the blonde and wiped away his salty tears with his thumbs.

"I've made it through one war, I can do it again."

Edward shuddered, taking in gasps of breaths to calm himself. His lover, the love of his life, was abruptly being stripped from him and taken across the country to war. How was he supposed to react?

Edward's body convulsed and he gripped a weak hand over his mouth. He closed his eyes and felt himself being lifted. He felt the cool tile underneath him and opened his eyes to see the white walls of the bathroom they shared.

He convulsed again at the thought.

"Relax Ed, shhh, It's alright Smiles, its ok," Roy coaxed as he rubbed his back. Ed placed a hand on Roy's face and pulled it down close to his.

"Call me Smiles again," Ed whispered hoarsely.

"I love you, Smiles," Roy said before pressing their lips together.

Edward pulled away tears escaping again, knowing he would miss the feel of his lover's lips.

"I love you too, Sparky," Ed said laying his head on his lover's chest. Roy stroked the blonde teen's hair, loving the feel of it between his fingers. Oh how he'd miss him. The way he drank his coffee, the faces he makes from the bitter taste. He would miss the golden hair between his fingers right now, stroking it and braiding it. He would miss the teens laugh and voice, for that was one of his most favorite things. He'd miss his sarcasm and jokes…..

"Roy," Ed said softly. He wiped away the tears rapidly going down the officer's face and brought him down for a hug.

"I'm gonna miss you so fucking much," Roy gasped into his neck. He held him bone crushingly tight, savoring these moments, because he knew that possibly he could never have them again. Ed didn't complain that he could barely breath, in fact he didn't care. He needed his alchemist's warmth and needed to remember his smell.

"I promise you Edward, that I will come back," Roy said sniffling. He wiped his tears off his face and kissed Edward violently. He held the back of his head, the other arm wrapped around his waist.

Edward snaked his arms around the man's neck and responded with all his might.

"I leave tomorrow, want to come?" Roy asked softly as he pulled away.

"No, we already said our goodbyes," Edward answered as they got up slowly.

"You just don't want people to see you cry."

"You know me too well."

Edward laughed weakly and wiped at his runny nose. He snorted and hugged Roy again.

"You won't leave me right?" he asked softly.

Roy picked the teen up, lying down on the bed with him. He clicked off the lamp and pulled him into his chest. He kissed the top of his head and snuggled into the soft golden hair whispering three small words.

"I would never."