A/N: Many hugs and kisses again to LTFran for doing what I am too lazy to do! ^3^ Your sweet comments and messages keep me going, thanks so much! XD


Chapter 9
Debt

"Did they send you here to kill me?" Sidonis asked, his voice low and void of emotion.

"Why would they need me to kill you? You're already doing a good job of doing it to yourself." Garrus crossed his arms.

Sidonis kept his eyes to the ground. He was huddled in the corner with his knees up to his chest. Garrus noticed that Sidonis was definitely malnourished, judging from the sallow color of his skin. From the condition of his clothing, it also looked like he hadn't bathed in a long time. It was a sad state to see him in. Garrus would have preferred the bastard who was responsible for the death of ten good men wasn't wallowing in a cesspool of self-pity.

"Then why are you here?" Sidonis muttered.

"C-Sec asked me to come here and speak to you. Apparently they think you're determined to die while you're in their custody."

Sidonis let out a hollow laugh. "I'm sure that the mighty Citadel Security force has bigger concerns than a two-bit criminal like me."

"You consider yourself a two bit criminal?" Garrus narrowed his eyes.

Sidonis slowly lifted his head and met Garrus' gaze with equal measure. "No. I'm a murderer. The worst kind. I killed ten people who I considered my closest friends."

When Garrus didn't respond, Sidonis continued. "I told you that their faces haunt me every night… but now it's worse. I can't sleep because all I can see whenever I close my eyes is the image of their broken and bloody bodies. I can't eat because whatever food I have in my stomach comes back up when I remind myself that they all died a slow and miserable death because of me." Sidonis' crazed eyes suddenly widened. "I can't live like this anymore, Garrus. I wish that human friend of yours never warned me. I wish you killed me when you had the chance."

Garrus knew about the haunting images Sidonis had spoken about. He had experienced the same nightmares after he discovered the bodies of his former squad. In a maddening way, those images were probably the reason why he was still alive. When he was stuck on the bridge on Omega with all the merc groups coming after him in waves, the main thing that kept him awake was the awful mental pictures of his dead comrades, bleeding and dying all around him.

But the nightmares had stopped on the day Shepard came back into his life. Shepard's mere presence had somehow saved him from his own spiral of self-destruction.

Is that the reason why she saved Sidonis? Did she somehow know that Sidonis was going through the inner torture that he had gone through before she had rescued him?

After a long minute of silence, Garrus finally spoke. "Tell me, Sidonis. Why did you betray us? Was it the money?"

"No." Sidonis buried his face in his hands. "One of the mercs trailed me and found me alone. He was from the Blue Suns. He said they knew who we all were. Said it would be a shame that something were to happen to Weaver's new baby girl. They knew everything!"

Garrus stiffened. "What happened?"

"The guy said that the merc groups had already planted explosives in some of our team's apartments. If I refused to cooperate they would detonate and kill our families. He said all they wanted was 'Archangel'… alone."

"They just wanted me?"

"The guy said all they wanted was Archangel… and everyone would go free. He said that once you were taken care of, our little group would disappear." Sidonis looked up at Garrus again. "I'm not making any excuses. I was terrified. I honestly thought if I brought you out alone, the rest of us would be spared. I thought if anyone could handle themselves against all the criminals on Omega, it would be you."

Before Garrus could reply, Sidonis raked his talons against his head. "It's my fault for being so damned stupid. They planned it all along. They wanted you gone so they had a chance to take down the team and they figured they would have a decent chance taking you out while you were alone. As soon as I heard what had happen, I didn't know what to do. I just ran."

Garrus' expression was cold. "You still betrayed us. If you just told us what was going on, we would have had a plan in place."

"You don't have to tell me that. I already know. It's my fault… I killed them all," Sidonis repeated and began to rock himself. "Garrus… if you have an ounce of compassion in you, just kill me now. Put me out of my misery. Please!"

Garrus looked at the pathetic being his former squad mate had become. He gave a disgusted sigh and turned away from Sidonis. "Do you know the name of the human that kept me from putting a bullet in your brain?"

Sidonis shook his head and Garrus stared at the lone camera in the room. "It was Commander Shepard."

The name jolted Sidonis back to reality and he immediately lifted his head. "THE Commander Shepard? The one who took down Saren? Your former Commander?"

"The one and only." Garrus turned back to Sidonis. "Commander Shepard, who saved the Citadel from the geth… who saved the galaxy from the Reapers… saved your life. Do you know what that means?"

Sidonis was speechless and shook his head again. Garrus quickly strode over to him and grabbed him by his throat. "The way I see it, you not only have to pay back for what you've done to the squad, but you now owe Shepard for taking the time to save your miserable life."

As Sidonis began to choke, Garrus loosened his grip and let him fall back to the floor. As Sidonis coughed for air, Garrus bent down to his level and thrust a sharp talon in his face. "Too bad for you that you can't repay the ten dead men back on Omega. But Shepard's still alive. You owe her a debt."

"Then what do you want me to do!" Sidonis yelled, frustrated from Garrus' indifference.

"Prove to Shepard that your life was worth saving. Make things right. Even if you were a traitorous bastard, you were talented enough to be on the team. You were the best black market dealer on Omega. Nobody knew how you pulled the strings to get so much information on illegal shipments." Garrus leaned in. "Go back to Omega. There's a clinic run by a doctor named Daniel Abrams. That clinic is the only legitimate business on that garbage dump. Use your talents and help out the clinic. Maybe after you dedicate your life to the cause, you might be able to pay back a fraction your karmic debt to Shepard."

Garrus abruptly stood up and banged on the door. "I'm ready to get out of here." The door beeped and slid open.

"Garrus!"

Garrus turned around to see Sidonis slowly stand back up on his feet. "How do I repay my debt to you?"

"You didn't kill me and I didn't kill you. I think that makes us even." Garrus simply stated and left the cell.


"Garrus… Garrus!" Tali followed the turian as he stormed away from the bar. "Don't go and do something you might regret later! Let's think this through!"

Garrus froze in mid-stride and Tali bumped into his back. He turned around to glare at her. "'Think this through'? Really? Did all you girls 'think this through' when you all tried to play this sadistic game of matchmaker?"

Tali wrung her hands. "We… we just wanted Shepard to experience a little romance. A distraction…"

Garrus rolled his eyes. "Well, that makes me feel better. So I was nothing more than a distraction for Shepard?"

"No!" Tali shook her head. "The others honestly believed you and Shepard would make a good couple!"

Garrus caught Tali's choice of words. "Wait… you said 'others'. You didn't think Shepard and I would get along?"

Tali swallowed a lump in her throat and frantically looked around for someone to save her. Unfortunately, Garrus had stormed out so quickly that he left a gaping Miranda and an embarrassed Kasumi behind at the bar. Tali turned back to Garrus' glowering expression. "I… I didn't really think that you would be interested in Shepard… you know… in that way."

"Why?"

Tali awkwardly twiddled her fingers. "It's not that you're not a good guy… because you are! I just didn't think you would have feelings like that for Shepard." She paused and gave him a questioning look. "Do you?"

Garrus waved off her question. "Are you trying to get Alenko together with Shepard?"

Tali immediately squared her shoulders. "What makes you think I'm trying to do something like that?"

"You knew, didn't you?" Garrus stared her down. "That Alenko's been interested in Shepard when we were all together on the first Normandy two years ago."

Tali was shocked. "How did you know that?"

"I'm pretty sure everyone knew… except for Shepard," Garrus muttered.

Tali didn't respond for a few moments as she contemplated her words. "Chief Williams wanted to him to succeed. She figured they would be good together… she thought he would treat her well. She was making plans… you know… before Virmire."

"Williams didn't live to see Alenko abandon Shepard the way he did," Garrus shook his head in anger.

Tali placed a hand on Garrus' shoulder. "I think… if Chief Williams was still around, he wouldn't have done what he did."

"That's no excuse." He shrugged off her hand.

"I'm surprised you think you have the right to judge him like that. You left Shepard before any of us did," Tali accused.

"I left to re-join C-Sec after we beat Saren." Garrus pointed to himself. "Shepard encouraged me to work towards the Spectre candidacy."

"Didn't Shepard ask you to stay with her a little longer to help her clear out the geth hold outs in the Terminus systems?"

"Shepard could handle her own against a few geth." Garrus gritted his teeth.

"But you still left," Tali affirmed. "And didn't you abandon C-Sec right after you found out she had died?"

The awful recollection of her death resurfaced before his eyes. He quickly pushed the memory back into the depths of his mind and let out a grunt of irritation. "I'm done with this. I'm finding Shepard and bringing her back." Garrus turned his back on Tali and stalked away.

Tali sighed in frustration as she watched Garrus storm off. She couldn't understand why he was so bitter towards Kaidan Alenko. Perhaps it was just another social protocol outside the flotilla that quarians would never be able to understand.


Kaidan swiped his key card into the scanner and his door to his apartment slid open. Shepard was still leaning heavily against him as he helped her inside. "Come on, Shepard… just a few more steps to the couch," he grunted.

"Ugh… everything is spinning. This isn't good," she groaned, her head rolling side to side.

The sensors picked up their presence and flickered on, illuminating the small apartment. Kaidan guided Shepard into the living room and gently helped her onto the couch. "Here, lie down for a little bit. Do you want some water?"

"Yes, please." Shepard heavily fell back into the cushions and covered her face with her arm. "Last time I ever underestimate anything from the asari. From now on it's good old fashioned liquor from Earth. The last hour is a total blur."

Kaidan paused and turned around. "You don't remember what I said back at the bar?"

"Sorry, no," Shepard muttered, rubbing her eyes. "What were you trying to talk to me about?"

"I confessed my love for you," Kaidan answered flatly.

"Ah, Kaidan. You still suck at joking around." Shepard laughed.

"Right. Joking around," Kaidan grumbled as he went to his refrigerator to grab a bottle of water. "Do you want me to turn off the lights?" he asked, handing it to her.

Shepard grinned. "Why, Kaidan… are you trying to set the mood?"

Kaidan's face instantly flushed a deep red. "N-no! Nothing like that! I just figured… because whenever I get migraines, turning down the lights tends to help…"

"Relax, Kaidan. I'm just playing with you." Shepard let out a happy sigh as she pressed the cold bottle against her forehead. She slowly opened her eyes and inspected her surroundings. The apartment was clean but the furnishings were sparse. The only pieces of furniture in the living room were the two piece couch set with a lone coffee table at the center. "Nice place… a bit empty though."

"Ah, yeah." Kaidan sat down on the adjacent sofa chair. "I just moved in a few weeks ago."

Shepard sat up to twist open the cap on her bottle of water. "Really? What made you decide to get a new place?"

"It wasn't really my decision." Kaidan smiled wryly. "When you get promoted, the Alliance basically kicks you out of the barracks. Kind of makes me feel like they basically gave me this title just so they didn't have to keep paying for my room and board."

Shepard took a sip from her water. "That's pretty funny… I felt exactly the same way when they made me commander. On the day I got promoted, Admiral Hackett basically handed me a duffel bag of my belongings and told me that I needed to find my own place because they needed my old room for the new recruits."

Kaidan chuckled. "Yeah, that's basically how they dropped this one on me. I haven't even gotten the chance to pick out the drapes."

Shepard raised an eyebrow. "Why don't you ask your girlfriend to do it for you?"

Kaidan jumped in his seat. "What? Girlfriend?"

"You have one, right?" Shepard asked again. "It's kind of sad, Kaidan. What's the point of having a girlfriend if she can't even do a little shopping for you?"

"What makes you think I have a girlfriend?" Kaidan's face was twisted in shock.

Shepard made a gesture. "Your apartment is spotless. Back on the old Normandy, your quarters were always so messy. There was dirty laundry everywhere."

"That's because I just moved in!" Kaidan defended himself.

Shepard pointed to her bottle of water. "This is sparkling water. What kind of guy has sparkling water in his fridge? It's obvious that you bought it for a girl."

"That water was on sale at the convenience store… Sorry it's not masculine enough of a product for me to have," he muttered.

"What about that email you sent me a little while back?" Shepard asked. "You mentioned that you've been having some drinks with a doctor on the Citadel."

Kaidan froze at Shepard's words. He had forgotten about how flawless her memory was. "That was… nothing."

"Didn't sound like 'nothing'." Shepard smiled and set the bottle down on the coffee table in front of her. "Come on, Kaidan. We're all grown ups here. So tell me… is she hot?"

"No! I mean…yes! I mean…" Kaidan took a deep breath and tried to collect himself. "No, I don't have a girlfriend."

"Aw, Kaidan, you don't have to hide it from me. So what kind of girl is she?"

"I'm not seeing anybody!" Kaidan exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air in frustration.

"Then why did you mention it in your email?" Shepard blinked. "Did you make her up?"

"I didn't make it up. I…" Kaidan abruptly stood up and ran his hands through his hair. "Shepard, I sent you that email right after I saw you on Horizon."

"Yeah?" She looked at him uncertainly.

Kaidan sighed and crouched down so he could be at eye level with Shepard. "I was a jerk when we met again back on Horizon. I'm sorry that I said all that stuff when we were there."

"Don't worry about it, Kaidan. I told you that I had no hard feelings." Shepard smiled in response.

"No. It wasn't right. I was so angry when I saw that you were Cerberus. A little after I watched you leave, I had a really bad migraine attack. It was so bad I ended up taking a double dose of pain killers…" Kaidan frowned. "And sent you that email."

Shepard burst out laughing. "Wait a second… are you saying that you… Kaidan Alenko… got high and sent me a message?"

"I wasn't high." Kaidan scowled. "I just… didn't have full control of my faculties."

"I guess that explains all that weird talk about Ilos." Shepard's laughter slowed down. "So were you lying about that girl?"

Kaidan shook his head. "I did go out to have some drinks with a girl a few weeks ago…but she's far from being my girlfriend. Look Shepard, after you died I went through a bad period of depression. The guys at the barracks…they fixed me up with a girl so I would snap out of it. I was so miserable that I decided to go with it… anything to take my mind off of you."

Shepard gave Kaidan a puzzled smile. "I don't understand what you're talking about, Kaidan."

He rolled his eyes and gently pushed her back into the couch cushions. "Damn it, Shepard! I don't know how many times I'm going to have to confess to you tonight. I'm in love with you!"

She began to laugh again, thinking it was a joke, but Kaidan's determined gaze slowly began to make her realize the legitimacy of his words. "You're not kidding, aren't you?" she whispered.

Kaidan gave her a dry grin. "Didn't you just say so yourself? I suck at telling jokes." He slowly lowered his lips onto hers.