A/N: Thank you for the feedback. You are wonderful! I hope you enjoy this chapter. Please read and review. Thanks to Kathy, my friend, for always reading and brainstorming with me. :)
CH. 8
Only lonely on the inside
I didn't mean, I didn't mean, to steal your dreams
Away
I'm only lonely on the inside
When you close your eyes, to your deepest thoughts,
Do you see me?
Blair yawned and stretched deeply under the covers, her eyes blinking slowly open to adjust to the sunlight streaming in through the large windows. She rolled away from the window and found the other half of the bed empty. Nate entered the room a few moments later dressed in a suit. "Morning," she greeted sleepily, snuggling into the pillow. They'd had a truly romantic evening the night before and it was exactly what she'd needed to get her mind back on track. Nate, June, wedding. That was all she wanted to focus on now.
"Good morning," he replied, leaning down to brush his lips over hers. "Did you sleep well?"
"Mmm," she answered in agreement, nodding slightly. "Why are you dressed already? It's Saturday."
"I have a trip," he replied sheepishly.
Suddenly she snapped awake and sat upright. "Again? Nate, you are gone all the time. Tonight's the big benefit I've been working on and you're going to miss it!" she said angrily.
"I know, Blair, and I'm sorry, but this is my job. I don't have much of a choice in the matter," he clipped.
Blair fell back against the pillows in a huff. "Fine. See you next time you breeze through town long enough to screw your fiancée."
"Oh, knock it off. You know I'd rather be here than away for work all the time."
"Do I?" she asked, casting a willful eye in his direction.
Nate scoffed at her remark. "You're being ridiculous and I'm late. I'll call you when I get there."
"Whatever. I hope your trip is superb," she said sarcastically, glaring at him.
His retort was an eye roll on the way out the door. Grabbing an extra pillow, she covered her face and screamed in frustration. Why was it always one step forward and a dozen backward with Nate these days? She knew she hadn't been exactly fair to him with her mind having been on Chuck recently, but that was done and she was recommitted to her future life. Right? That's exactly what she told herself anyway.
"And just where do you think you're going, mister?" Blair asked playfully, sitting up and wrapping her arms around his middle, pressing her bare breasts against his naked back. It was still dark outside and he didn't have to leave for a few more hours.
Chuck turned his head and pressed a noisy kiss to her cheek. "I was going to get some water—you wore me out, woman."
"Well, you'd better refuel, because I'm nowhere near close to done with you yet," she offered suggestively.
"Is that so?" he asked, his voice deep and thick.
"It is," she whispered, nipping at his earlobe. "And bring me some water while you're at it—pretty please."
The smirk danced on his lips as he looked back at her. "I can do that." He squeezed her thigh and got to his feet.
She sighed contentedly and sank back against the plush pillows, drawing the covers up to ward off the chill in the room. His scent was everywhere and she inhaled deeply as she snuggled deeper under the blankets. He'd been in town for three days now and they'd only left the bed long enough to shower or order food. As soon as the sun was up, he'd have to get ready to fly back to Tokyo. It was just how their relationship was for the time being and they tried to make the very most of it. She worked hard to be supportive of the situation since he had no say in the matter. Being whiny and bratty with Chuck Bass didn't score any points—especially given their intercontinental relationship. Sure, she had her moments where she was both whiny and bratty, but she tried to keep them at a minimum where he was concerned. There'd been no whining whatsoever during this visit. Moaning and groaning, however, was a completely different matter.
Her eyes opened when his weight shifted the bed and his fingers combed the hair back away from her face. Chuck held the half empty glass of water out for her. She pushed herself to a seated position letting the sheet fall down to pool at her waist. "Thanks," she smiled and ran a hand gently down the side of his stubbled face. The ice clanked against the crystal as she gulped down the water, not realizing until that moment how thirsty she'd been.
Chuck took the glass from her and set it on the nightstand. Before she had a chance to blink, he pulled onto his lap so they sat face to face. "Can we rewind the clock?" he murmured, his hands fisting in her hair and resting on the nape of her neck. His intense chocolate gaze fixed on hers and he smiled sadly.
More than anything she wanted to cry and beg him not to go back, but that wasn't what he needed or wanted; nor would it help the situation. "I wish," she responded, outlining his full lips with her index finger. "But we can make the most of the time we have left," she said with a raised brow, trying to lighten the mood. Blair wriggled closer to him and felt him stirring between her thighs.
With both hands, she drew his head slowly towards her and pressed her lips gently against his. His lips were soft and pliable as they unhurriedly savored each sensation. His hands kneaded the back of her neck as he changed angles, opening his mouth against hers. Blair moaned quietly when his lips left her mouth and sought the sensitive spot between her jaw and her ear; leaning in she pressed her body flush to his. Just as quickly as he'd pulled her to his lap he had her on her back and was hovering above her. The roguish gleam glinted playfully in his eyes. "Let's just call Tokyo and tell them I died."
Giggling, Blair rolled them over and straddled him. "That's an excellent idea, Mr. Bass."
She and Chuck had always had epic goodbyes. They loved each other until the absolute last possible second and then they practically had to be ripped apart from each other. What did she have with Nate? Sarcastic words and eye rolls? Sighing heavily, Blair smacked her forehead in rapid succession trying to knock some sense into her brain that had apparently gone half retarded. "You are not with Chuck anymore. You are with Nate. Chuck is an asshole who stopped returning your calls. Nate's a workaholic, but a good man. Chuck is—ugh, stop it, Blair. Just stop." Hastily kicking off the covers, she flew out of bed and stomped to her bathroom to shower. She had a million and one things to accomplish before the start of the benefit and pondering the differences between Chuck and Nate wasn't the way to get anything done.
GG: Good morning, Upper East Siders. It seems that Nate Archibald was seen leaving in a huff this morning from his betrothed's apartment building. Perhaps B's wedding planning is wearing the poor man down. I guess he'll miss her fancy benefit tonight at the Palace as he later was spotted at JFK. Tsk tsk, N. Care to share your frequent flyer miles with me? Sometimes I can use a vacation from all of the salacious scoop. I have a bit of a blind item this morning, pets, but I can't reveal all of the deets just yet as I'm trying to get hard evidence. It seems that a Gossip Girl fave has returned to the UES and if it's true, I'll just be the happiest little girl that ever gossiped. Stay tuned. You know you love me. XOXO, Gossip Girl.
Chuck stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist. His phone vibrated on the counter and he read the latest blast from Gossip Girl. A devious smile found its way to his face and he decided that harpy was finally good for something.
The afternoon was spent on overseeing the setup of the party, making sure that the months of hard work that she'd put into this affair wouldn't unravel at the last second because of some imbecile setting the room up incorrectly or screwing up the seating chart. Blair Waldorf expected perfection and perfection she would get. She saw to it that the linens were laid just so over the tables and that every place card was as it should be. All of the stemware had to be crystal clear and the silver polished to a brilliant gleam. None of these tasks were ones she actually completed, but she knew how to supervise and bark orders. She'd been doing that for as long as she could remember and was well practiced at it.
Throughout the day she kept getting the strangest feeling that somebody was watching her. Every time she whirled around to see who it was, there were just volunteers and hotel staff milling about doing her bidding. She never did catch anyone looking at her. Something was around the corner though. Perhaps it was just that the party would be a smashing success and she would raise tons of money for the "Children and the Arts" foundation. Then, everyone would know just how brilliant she was and that her Yale degree wasn't going to waste.
Glancing at her watch, Blair knew she had to get out of there to get ready for the party. She circled the room one last time, satisfied with the progress in the ballroom. Grabbing her planner and stuffing it into her oversized bag, she hurried out of the room and into the lobby. Again, she felt someone's eyes on her and she stopped in her tracks, slowly turning around; once again finding nothing but hotel guests and staff, none of whom were looking in her direction. Jesus, Blair, get a grip. She hitched her bag higher on her shoulder and decided a drink was definitely in order before the benefit to calm the hell down as she stepped out of the hotel and into a waiting taxi.
Chuck lowered the Wall Street Journal that was hiding his face and watched Blair breeze out of the hotel. He was being stupid skulking around all afternoon trying to get a glimpse of her, but after a year and some change of not seeing her at all, he was curious. He would let her know he was back soon enough, but getting caught now wasn't a part of the plan. He'd watched her give orders to the poor saps in the room and the corners of his lips twitched upward at how bossy and take charge she'd been. She hadn't changed a bit—her looks included. Blair Waldorf was still as breathtakingly beautiful as she always had been and that stirred up feelings Chuck would rather not have. He folded the paper and headed upstairs to his suite. He was a busy man and didn't have time to sit around and moon after Blair Waldorf all day. Besides, Chuck Bass didn't moon.
Hundreds of the Upper East Side's most prominent members milled about the ballroom sipping champagne, eating caviar and hob-knobbing with the other elites while music filled the air courtesy of a few students from Julliard. Blair stood in the center of it all, greeting and schmoozing her guests, hoping that they would all open their checkbooks and give a most heartfelt (read: hefty) donation to her cause. She smiled when she saw Lily and Serena, sadly with Humphrey in tow, approach.
"Blair, you look fantastic, darling," Lily greeted, kissing her cheek. "This is a fabulous turnout."
"Thank you, Lily," Blair smiled. "S, you look gorgeous," she told her best friend. Remembering her upbringing she cast a disdainful look at Dan. "Humphrey."
"Waldorf," he nodded. "I'm going to get us some champagne," he said to Serena. "Excuse me."
Blair fought the urge to roll her eyes and focused her attention on Serena. "So, what do you think?" For all of her bravado, she always counted on Serena's opinion.
"B, it's amazing," Serena gushed. "Truly. There are so many people here and you know they all want to top each other with their donations."
"That's what I'm counting on. Who better to plan one of these events than someone who knows the players involved?" Blair flashed a sly grin and she and Serena giggled.
"Where's Nate?" Lily asked, looking around the room.
Blair's smile faltered slightly. "Oh, he had another trip so he was unable to make it this evening," she replied, ever the polished lady.
"Well, I'm sure he's sorry to miss your big night," Lily assured her. "I see someone I must say hello to. If you ladies will excuse me."
"Are you okay?" Serena asked.
"Why wouldn't I be?" She avoided Serena's eyes and instead waved and smiled at some guests nearby.
"B, this is me you're talking to."
"I'm aware of that, Serena," she clipped.
"Why does Nate have to travel so much? This is all rather recent isn't it?"
"It's his job and I'm—"
"Supportive, I know," Serena finished. "I just want to make sure you're okay. If there's something you want to talk about, you know that I'm always here."
"Thank you. Well, here comes your boyfriend. I have more guests to greet. I'll see you later, S." She smiled at her friend and walked away.
An hour later, Blair was seething inside. Every guest she spoke with inquired about Nate and every time she answered that he was away on business she'd seen the knowing looks from the men and the pitying looks from the women. It was humiliating and if she had to answer one more question about him she was going to scream or rip someone's head off. Grabbing a glass of champagne from a passing tray, she headed for the terrace to get some air.
Thankful for a moment of solitude, Blair stared out at the twinkling lights of the garden and took a healthy gulp from her glass of bubbly. Her skin prickled with goosebumps and the hair on the back of her neck stood at attention when she felt a pair of eyes on her for the umpteenth time that day. Slowly looking left then right, she found herself to be alone. She shook her head and told herself she was crazy. It was probably all the stress associated with putting on this event. Drinking the last of her champagne, she heard footsteps behind her.
"Great party, Waldorf," the familiar voice greeted.
Blair quickly turned and saw him emerging from the shadows, looking somehow taller and more handsome than she remembered. "Chuck?" she asked in disbelief. How could she be staring at him when he was in Tokyo? The stress of the evening had officially sent her over the edge.
Chuck raised his glass of champagne as a toast to her and drank deeply. Approaching footsteps sounded and he smirked at her. "Another time, Blair," he said roguishly and just as quickly as he appeared he was gone again, leaving a gaping mouthed Blair in his wake.
"Blair, there you are," Serena said. "Some of the guests are leaving and they were asking about you. Are you okay? You look like you've seen a ghost."
Bingo. Sometimes Serena really could hit the nail directly on the head. "I'm fine. I just needed some air. Thanks for finding me; I should go thank everyone for coming." Serena walked away and Blair looked around the terrace once more for a sign that she'd actually just laid eyes on Chuck Bass.
Once the last of the guests had left, she fought the urge to plop down at one of the tables and pound her head repeatedly against it. Her stomach had been in knots for the remainder of the evening. The event had been an enormous success, but once she'd left the terrace, she'd barely noticed anything. All she could see was Chuck raising his glass to her and staring at her intently with his trademark smirk affixed to his handsome face. The bitch of it all was that she wasn't sure at all if it had been real or she had finally lost it and imagined the whole thing. There was only one way to find out.
She approached the front desk and greeted the concierge. "Hello," she began.
"Miss Waldorf?" the gentlemen asked.
"Yes?"
"Mr. Bass said if you inquired that we were to tell you that you'd know where to find him." He smiled, obviously amused by the whole thing.
Blair pursed her lips. "Yes, I'm sure he did," she retorted. "Thank you."
Fuck that and fuck him. I'm not playing his little game. She steeled her spine, turned on her heel and headed for the exit. She was halfway out the door when she turned again and stalked towards the elevators in a huff. Goddamn it! Why is he doing this to me? If he thinks he can just blow back into town and expect me to fall at his feet he's got another thing coming. She got off on the 18th floor and headed down the hall to suite 1812.
She briefly paced outside his door, choking back the urge to throw up. There were way too many memories associated with this room and she was about to walk right back into it all. With a deep breath and a shaky hand, she knocked on the door. When the locked clicked, she swallowed the huge lump in her throat and stood up straight. The door swung open and she was once again face to face with Chuck Bass. Make that a smirking Chuck Bass with the smoldering eyes.
"Waldorf," he greeted slowly.
"Bass," she responded.
