The shuttle was too quiet and allowed too much room to think. Inara gave up on rest, turned on some music and made a pot of tea. She had spent most of the evening trying to comfort Kaylee but she was almost inconsolable. No one on this ship was a stranger to death but what she had seen was clearly more than just that. From what she had gathered it was absolutely gruesome. Inara was glad she had been trying to stay in her shuttle more and would not have to remember the scene as Kaylee would.
She had heard all the rumors that had been circulating and considered separating her shuttle just in case but what would that really do? They were too far from a planet for her to get anywhere safe. Their course would keep them well away from anyone who would care how fast they were traveling. She would be stuck here and have to worry about possible infection with whatever disease caused that poor boy to die so horribly. While most of Kaylee's concern was the terrible sight, she was also deeply upset that he had been so certain it was contagious.
With a soft sigh, Inara sat in one of her comfortable seats with the soothing warmth and smell of her favorite tea. Part of her mind was scolding her for not having left sooner, for postponing the inevitable. What was right and what was desired often conflicted and she was bothered by how easy it was to set aside what was right for just a little while. Sometimes 'a little while' grew beyond the limitations of the phrase when one wasn't looking.
She closed her eyes, sipped her tea and tried to turn her mind entirely to the soothing, familiar strains of the music.
Inara opened her eyes as she was caught around the waist and found herself dancing. Her surprise was quickly masked through habit and she smiled at the handsome young man who led her through the spinning couples in an intricate pattern all the others followed with great care. She felt no need to talk - it was not necessary when dancing and could be considered impolite in some places. Though she could not remember where this was… Who this was…
She blinked and realized it was Mal. Slide, spin, step… she focused on the movements for a moment as she tried to remember how she got there. He smiled at her, that pained look she so often saw in his eyes was absent. His smile was genuine and he made no effort to disguise the adoration he usually took pains to control. In truth she could not remember the last time he had looked so happy.
Knowing it was foolish, she allowed herself to let go and simply enjoy the moment. However much she wished to deny it, she had wanted this for a long time and did her best to hide her pleasure as a slower song played and he drew her closer.
"Gou huang tang, Inara." He said softly in her ear as he pulled her closer. "Ain't no reason we should keep dancing around each other even when there's no music. I love you. I have for a long time."
"I… know." She felt a stab of guilt as he leaned back enough to look her in the eyes and she saw the deep pain. How many times had she wished for him to say those words? How many times had she wanted to repeat them back? There was so much complication involved in that, though…
"That's all? I know I'm a fool but you know what you are?" He asked sadly. She didn't have a chance to respond, she blinked and was suddenly in the arms of a horribly scarred man in filthy clothing. He smirked and pain exploded as a gloved hand covered in blades plunged into her chest. "You're a heartless whore."
He cackled as she stared at the beating heart in his hands while the crowd around them stood laughing… clapping… cheering….
