Chapter 9

I didn't know what day it was. Let alone what time it was. The alarm woke me up shaking me out the dreams that never faded. It wasn't a nightmare, but it wasn't a dream that would come true. What made me smile in my dream, now made my heart pull with fresh pain.

My dream of me and Lincoln laying in bed, and it was just to enjoy a sunrise, breathing in each other skin. The smell his scent, the after glow of making love, and his hands lightly running over my skin kissing every part of me that he could reach.

I knew that this was just a dream, a wild fantasy that would never be real for me.

I pulled the covers off me, and I quickly showered. In all of the days that passed since I decided to keep my discovery to myself.

Sara started to talk to me again, but then I'd never really understood her anymore. She would seem like she was hiding something from me.

I got to work that day I went straight to my office. I ignored the fact that for once Bellick didn't wait for me to arrive. I come to the conclusion he had given up on me. Part of me was happy he gave up. The other part of me was paranoid. I just settle down at my desk filling out paper work that I'd been ignoring for the past few days. I didn't hear the door knock. I lifted my head to see Sara standing in front of my desk.

"Sara what's wrong?" shifting my weight to stand up.

Sara took a deep breath moving to the sofa sitting down. I sat by her side taking her hand in mine, and she was trembling while her eyes avoided mine.

"Sara please tell me…" I spoke slowly trying to get her attention.

"I just can't. I need to get some air." She got to her feet leaving my office without a backward glance.

I sat on the sofa trying to understand what was going on. Then a CO poked his head into my office.

"Have you seen Brad?"

I shrugged getting to my feet, and he nodded leaving the office.

That evening I locked up my office. I didn't get that far when the fire alarm went off, and I walked out the building slowly. I see the inmate wandering out dazed and confused. I took a deep breath looking to the crowed.

I looked around the inmates being taken back in after a false alarm. I then held my hand close to chest trying to not show the recognition on my face.

His eyes found me, and he just kept moving. I didn't say anything staring at Michael walking the inmates back in.

When I got to my car I started it without think what I was doing. I wasn't running away from a crime scene. I just couldn't think of what to do.

I was in full awareness that a prison break was happening, and I was running away from it.

When I got home I walked into my living room, the blinking of my phone told me I had a waiting message. I slipped off my coat and looked to the clock.

I was driving aimlessly for three hours and it was now looking to the clock.

I didn't know who might have called, but I lightly pressed the play button. The machine saying it's normal. "You have one new message, left at eight fifty nine pm."

The beep caught me off guard, but the voice was in pain.

"I trusted him, Becca. I did something so bad. I thought he loved me, but he just used me to his plan."

The voice on the message seemed to break out with everything she wanted to say before.

I then listened on.

"Becca I want you to know, you're the best's friend I could ask for. I am sorry. I love you. I'm sorry."

Then voice was getting fainter.

My hand gripping my keys, and my eyes stared blank at the answer machine.

"Please tell my dad I love him, and please don't hate me for what I did… I left the door open so he could escape." The phone went dead, and my stomach lurched.

The first thing I did was erase the message. Then I grabbed my coat rushing for my car.

I drove to the speed limit, but I wanted to get there faster. The adrenaline was coursing through my veins. My heart beat was like a time bomb. I glanced to the clock in my car, the message wasn't that old. I could be in time, and I just needed to believe I wasn't too late.

I got to the apartment, but when I knocked nobody answered, and I didn't want my fear to be true. I knocked on the door harder, but still there was no movement on the other side of the door.

I then reached into my purse taking out my spare key for Sara's front door. I didn't like the fact I wasn't sure what I was going to see when I opened the door.

When the door swung up I rushed into room quickly. I then rushed to the sofa I see the bottle of morphine, and the needle in her arm.

Her face was lying down on the sofa her eyes closed, but her face wasn't at any kind of peace. I quickly grabbed my cell phone fumbling on the keys with my shaky hands.

"Hello I need an ambulance it's an emergency. My friend has taken a lethal dose of morphine." I listen to the operator trying to calm me down, but my head was spinning. I look up to see the police enter the apartment, and I jumped to my feet.

My eyes were spilling down with tears.

"Please help her. Please." I begged hearing the police talk into his radio to get an ambulance quick.

On the ride to the hospital the paramedics doing all they could to keep her heart beating. I sat feeling like my stomach was going to twist over on itself. I couldn't watch them try and keep her alive. In that moment I hated Michael Scofield. I wanted my friend to have not gone through this ordeal.

If I'd just told Henry, If only I hadn't been so selfish my best friend wouldn't be fighting for her life right now.

When we pulled up to the hospital I couldn't move from the ambulance, and I felt like my whole body had gone numb. The paramedics offered me something for my nerves, but I refused getting out in time. I didn't know what to do. The police showing up only meant one thing. They knew that Sara had left the door open.

I sat alone waiting for any news; I just wanted her to be ok. I didn't like the feeling of falling into an unknown tunnel. I was terrified of what was going on.

I then see a doctor walk towards me, and in my mind the look on his face told me everything.

I got to my feet to meet him halfway across the room

"I'm sorry, we tried all we can, but she didn't make it."

I took in a sharp breath feeling myself fall to the ground sobbing my heart out.

Sara can't be dead, she just can't be.

The doctor tried to sooth me, but it didn't work. I had lost the only friend that meant everything to me. I couldn't believe it was so but it was.

I lay on the floor for twenty minutes before someone helped me to my feet. I looked to Mr Tancredi stared in my eyes.

"You found her." It was more of a statement than a question.

His eyes wide, and he held me in a hug, and I was shocked from this sign of mourning.

"I'm sorry for your lose." I choked out.

When he let me good he slipped something into my hand.

I looked to the funny looking key.

"Just keep that safe." He spoke quietly to me, and then looked around.

"I will." I replied and he rushed away from me.

The doctor returned to me.

"Can I see her please?"

The doctor watched my face, and then nodded.

"Yes we're about to take her to the morgue.

He led me to the room where Sara's body lay; she looked cold as I pressed my hand in hers.

"Sara I hate you, you stupid bitch!" I felt the fresh tears washing down my cheek.

She still lay motionless. I bit my bottom lip as it trembled.

"I can't believe you would do this, how could you do this?" I kept my tone low, and her body kept haunting me, and I slapped the face of a body never to feel the blow.

"I hate you Sara Tancredi. I fucking hate you." I yelled, but it wasn't true. I loved her like a sister, and now she was gone. She left me behind to face the mess.

I left the room heading to the exit.

Finally leaning over a bush I felt my stomach empty and the sweat pouring down my face mixed with tears.

I was going to have to clean her mess.