INT: MIRANDA'S LIVING ROOM.
Miranda is still asleep on the sofa. It is early morning. Gary comes in and places a envelope next to her. He kisses her forehead and walks out of the room, picking up a suitcase and carrying on our of the front door. The door slams. Miranda wakes
MIRANDA: Oh no! Gary!
She jumps up, causing the letter to fall under the coffee table. She runs to the door but Gary's van has already pulled off.
INT: MIRANDA'S SHOP
Stevie and Andrew are sat behind the counter. They are looking through a holiday brochure. Miranda walks in wearing a Where's Wally onesie.
STEVIE: Oh no!
ANDREW: What?
STEVIE: A onesie in the workplace, something is wrong!
Miranda lollops towards the counter.
STEVIE: Are you okay Big one?
Stevie runs around the counter.
ANDREW: I'll get us all a cup of tea, tea makes everything better!
Andrew disappears into the back.
MIRANDA: Gary's gone!
STEVIE: uh, what now please?
MIRANDA: Gary's gone. I woke up this morning and he's gone!
STEVIE: But where?
MIRANDA: He's Ireland!
STEVIE: Ireland?
MIRANDA: Yeah he has a few events on over there!
Stevie slaps Miranda on the arm.
STEVIE: I thought you meant that he had "left you" left you!
Miranda sits on the bottom step of the stairs, Steve joins her. Andrew comes out with a tray, it has three cups of tea, biscuits, slices of cake and Jaffa cakes.
ANDREW: Thought that some tidbits were needed as well as the cuppa!
MIRANDA: Oh I like you! You can stay!
Andrew gives Miranda the massive tea cup and allows her to choose something from the tray.
MIRANDA: But no, getting away from the point! I think he might have left for good! I told him something last night and he walked out.
STEVIE: What was it?
MIRANDA: It doesn't matter!
STEVIE: Are you sure? You look as if you have the world resting on your shoulders!
MIRANDA: If that were the case my squire, I'm sure I would be more like your size, don't you think?
Stevie jumps up and walks off towards Andrew who is back behind the counter.
ANDREW: What about here?
MIRANDA: Planning your escape are we?
STEVIE: Being nosey are we?
Miranda gets up and starts to sulk around the shop. She picks up a toy gun. It has sucker-darts in it. She starts to hum the James Bond Theme tune. She hides behind one of the displays and pokes her head around. Stevie and Andrew are sat laughing and giggling. Miranda aims the gun and shoots.
MIRANDA: I have killed someone!
Miranda looks to the camera and laughs. The camera swivels round to reveal Stevie, she has one of the darts stuck to her forehead.
MIRANDA: Oh Stevie, I am sorry!
Miranda looks to the camera again.
MIRANDA: I'm not!
Penny walks in.
PENNY: Hi Stevie, how are you?
Miranda jumps out from behind the display holding up the gun.
MIRANDA: Stick 'em up!
Penny screams and throws her handbag at Miranda.
PENNY: Take it! Please just don't hurt me!
MIRANDA: Mum! It's me!
PENNY: OH Miranda! Will you grow up! You will send me to an early grave!
Miranda looks to the camera.
MIRANDA: Well.
Penny walks up to the counter, she turns towards Miranda and signals here to come closer.
PENNY: (Mouthing the words) Who's that?
MIRANDA: (Mouthing the words) Stevie's boyfriend!
PENNY: (Whispering) Sorry?
MIRANDA: (Shouting) Stevie's boyfriend!
Stevie and Andrew look towards Miranda and Penny, who wave back at them!
PENNY: Right Miranda, calling in on a favour! You and Gary must come to the tennis do tonight, your father is refusing.
MIRANDA: I'm afraid Gary's not here at the moment!
Miranda walks towards the side room.
PENNY: Well, where is he?
Miranda goes into the side room.
STEVIE: Gary is in Ireland for an event, something has happened but she won't talk about it.
The three of them huddle together and start talking. Miranda comes back out, she tries to get their attention then looks to the camera.
MIRANDA: I could say anything, they'd be none the wiser!
She stands in the middle of the room.
MIRANDA: I am running away the circus!
The three are still huddled together.
MIRANDA: I have joined a convent!
Still no movement.
MIRANDA: I AM WITH CHILD!
They all look around
STEVIE: What did you just say?
Penny faints.
STEVIE: Is that why Gary left?
Miranda retreats to the bean bag below her!
STEVIE: Come on Miranda! Pull yourself together!
Stevie pulls her up.
MIRANDA: I'm sorry!
STEVIE: Is that why Gary left?
MIRANDA: I told him last night, he just got up, took the boys back to Chris and Alison, then either didn't come home or went straight away this morning!
STEVIE: Maybe his flight was earlier than he thought?
MIRANDA: What am I going to do?
STEVIE: Have you tried ringing him?
MIRANDA: Straight to voicemail.
STEVIE: He wouldn't just leave!
ANDREW: Um sorry to interrupt, but are you going to do anything about the person on the floor? penny jumps up.
MIRANDA: Hand us that water!Andrew passes Miranda a cup of water which she then throws on Penny's head.
PENNY: I'm going to be a grandma! FINALLY!
She runs up to Miranda.
PENNY: Your father is going to be thrilled!
Penny walks out of the shop.
MIRANDA: I'm going home!
STEVIE: Are you you don't want to stay here with us tonight?
MIRANDA: No, I'll be fine! I just want my own bed!
Miranda exits.
INT: MIRANDA'S LIVING ROOM
Miranda is led on the sofa tucked up in a blanket watching Bridget Jones Diary. Miranda looks to the camera.
MIRANDA: I'm pretty sure this film is actually based upon my life!
The doorbell rings.
MIRANDA: Who is it?
Stevie pops her head around the door.
STEVIE: It's me! I didn't want you to be on your own! I come bearing gifts!
Stevie comes into the living room with a bag of goodies.
STEVIE: Have you heard from him?
MIRANDA: Not a dot!
Stevie takes her coat off and sits on the floor by the sofa. She lays all of the treats on the coffee table and spots the letter that Gary left.
STEVIE: What's this?
She gives it to Miranda.
MIRANDA: I don't know, thats Gary hand writing!
STEVIE: Open it!
MIRANDA: I don't think I can!
STEVIE: Miranda you need to!
Miranda sits up and rips open the letter.
STEVIE: What does it say?
Miranda looks at Stevie with a shocked expression.
STEVIE: What is it?
Scene Ends.
