Tears traveled down her cheeks as she continued to cry. Squeezing her eyes shut as she desperately tried to see his face.
But nothing appeared.
She couldn't remember.
Xena's eyebrows furrowed together at Gabrielle's comment.
"Gabrielle……are you saying that you can't remember Joxer?" Xena asked in a hushed voice, almost as if saying it was disgraceful.
Gabrielle didn't respond but nodded her head.
Ella just stayed beside Gabrielle. Not saying anything but just looking at the woman before her.
"I can't….I can't see him. Every time I try to remember him…I just…..I can't remember him. Every since I stepped foot in Greece, I….I've been forgetting things about him. Now I can't…..I can't even remember his face." Gabrielle tried to get out as tears continued to follow.
"How is that possible? How can I not remember him? I don't understand." Gabrielle said as her lost eyes scanned the ground trying to find her answer there.
"I don't know Gabrielle." Xena said.
"I don't know." Ella said a second later.
Xena looked over at Ella and saw the concern on her face for Gabrielle.
Xena smirked.
Ella was a good kid.
Turning back her eyes and attention to Gabrielle, she didn't know what to say to Gabrielle.
"Gabrielle……I know your hurting right now…but you have to realize that something is going on. You and I both know that we could never forget Joxer. (Xena smirked), even if we wanted to."
At the comment Gabrielle let out a small laugh as tears still clouded her vision.
"Come on Gabrielle, think! Up until a few weeks ago you were fine. Only until we came to Greece did you start to forget. Something is going on! Some God is doing this Gabrielle. Now we need to find out why there doing it." Xena said with enthusiasm.
Xena needed to give Gabrielle an incentive to get off the ground and move. To find out who was causing Gabrielle's memory loss, and why they were doing it.
It worked.
Gabrielle nodded her head at what Xena was saying. Eyes drying as the tears subsided, Gabrielle began to rationalize and agree with what Xena was saying.
Sniffing, Gabrielle began to hoist herself off the ground, Xena and Ella following in her right behind her.
"Ella…" Gabrielle said.
"Yes…" Ella responded.
"We start riding tomorrow before first light. Get some rest- we're traveling a long way tomorrow and you'll need your energy." Gabrielle said as she grabbed both of their skins with water and began to walk towards the stream that they had filled them with.
"Where are you going?" Ella asked with a concerned voice as she began to follow Gabrielle.
"To the stream to fill the skins, and then to the river for a bath." Gabrielle informed her, and then was deep into the forest before Ella could say anything more.
Both Ella and Xena stood side by side looking into the forest where Gabrielle had disappeared into.
Ella let out a deep sigh and turned back to look down at the ground that had the beads of the necklace scattered all over, except for the small pile where Gabrielle had gathered and left on the ground.
Xena turned as well as she saw with the corner of her eyes Ella lower herself to the ground.
A smile of sadness graced Xena's face as she watched Ella get down on all fours and begin to collect all of the beads off of the ground.
"You really are a good kid." Xena said out loud.
With that Xena turned her head back to the woods where Gabrielle had entered, and began to walk in the same direction.
Xena never noticed Ella turn around, and eerily stare right at her retreating form.
Gabrielle was moving without thought. Trampling through the thicket before her, her mind raced as Xena's words resounded in her head. So caught up in her thoughts, she stumbled and fell into the stream.
Standing up drenched with water, her anger boiled up from deep with in her.
Throwing down the water skins she grabbed her head and tried to breath. She had to calm herself down. She began to cry again as the frustration and void inside her began to grow.
It made no sense.
Why can't I remember his face? How can I forget about him?
Sinking down to the ground, her knees not able her to hold her up any longer, she began to quietly sob.
It's this way that Xena found her.
Xena sighed out as she sat down next to Gabrielle in the stream.
Xena said nothing but just sat there next to Gabrielle as she let the tears flow.
A few minutes passed, with either of them saying anything.
Sniffling and wiping away the evidence of her tears she began to talk, which Xena knew she would in time.
"I owe him more then this Xena. He was our friend and he was part of our family and he….." Gabrielle began as she again began to tear up.
"Died for you….." Xena whispered out.
Gabrielle looked down to her lap and fiddled with her hands as she nodded sadly.
"How can I do that Xena? How can I live with myself if I can't even remember his face? I should have it burned into me but I can't….I can't (she began to choke)...what kind of person does that make me?" Gabrielle whispered out as her emotions got the better of her.
"Gabrielle, I don't think you are at fault for this. You could never forget Joxer. It's impossible. That stupid mug of his, with his….." Xena suddenly stopped as she tried to remember his face.
At her sudden stop, Gabrielle looked over at Xena.
Xena's face was suddenly very somber.
"Xena….."
Gabrielle stared as she saw Xena actually try and remember Joxer's face.
Xena's eyes danced as her mind tried to find the familiar face of her dead friend, as she found none.
Gabrielle knew the second that Xena's eyes found hers once more, what was going on.
"You can't remember his face can you?" Gabrielle asked in an oddly calm voice.
Xena's eyes stared out as if lost. Slowly her eyes darkened and her pupils became small dots.
"Someone wants us to forget him…….but I won't let them." Xena said in a quiet voice, making her sound evil and dangerous.
Gabrielle stared at Xena's profile with moist eyes.
"Where do we go from here?" Gabrielle asked in an emotional whisper.
Xena studied the ground for a second before she spoke.
"We find Ares…..and see if we can rattle his cage for some answers."
"You really think Ares has something to do with this?" Gabrielle asked with eyes that spoke of hurt.
Xena looked into the forest in front of them.
"I hope so." Xena whispered.
Gabrielle just stared at Xena, understanding her reasoning immediately. Knowing that if Ares was not to blame……then there was another God involved- A new danger to face. And still they had no idea why………they couldn't remember his face.
