Chapter Title: I love you

Summary: Izaya attempts suicide after years of bearing Shizuo's hate for him, when he wakes up he finds himself as his high-school self on the day of his initiation ceremony, while in the real world Shizuo takes Izaya to Shinra's and begins to realise his feelings for the 'flea'. Will the two ever be reunited?

Hey heyyy I am here again, depending on how much time I decide to spend on my essays will decide on when I post this, but right now it is the 18th of Oct 5:27 pm (EST) so, yeah…

Well back in one of the reviews one of you faithful people said that Izaya's crying scene was stopped too short, and since earlier I didn't know what I was going to write about for this chapter, I know what I'm gonna write now.

So here's some more of Izaya crying but it's just an overlap of the last part when it was from Shizuo's view.

Izaya: Whaatt? You're gonna make me cry even more?

Shizuo: *sitting on my couch* Hehe, crybaby.

Izaya: Sh-shizu-chaannn, I'm not a crybabyy.

Shizuo: Tch, yeah yeah.

Mercy: *pushes Izaya onto Shizuo's lap* Yeah so I hope you guys enjoy the 9th chapter of 'I wasBroken'

Ohohoo, well guess what, now it's 8:30 pm. Well I'll just be writing now… Enjoy ^^


Disclaimer: I do not own Durarara or the characters in any way


"… I loved you, and you loved me and…" 'What am I saying?'

The raven bent over Shizuo's lap letting his head touch the blonde's strong chest as he put his hands over his face once more and cried. He tried talking but it all ended up in a mess of words that didn't make any sense, he gave up as another bout of sobs racked through his body.

He heard the sounds of Shizuo saying things and distinctly felt him pull the raven close but it seemed so far away, it was like he was back in his dream except that this one was filled with darkness and echoing sounds from outside.

'I… why…? I only wanted to stay there… with Shizuo, I just wanted to…'

Izaya…

The raven thought he heard someone say his name but after a minute of waiting for it to call again he went back to his own thoughts.

'… I just wanted him to love me… but reality is always harsh and nothing goes as wanted…not even if…' He laughed inwardly as the thought crossed his mind.

Oi, Izaya…

There it was, his name and this time he was sure someone from the outside was saying it because he felt something press upon his shoulders and shake him.

His eyes followed the line of the blonde's bartender suit until it reached his mocha eyes…

'He looks kinda… worried…'

Izaya wiped his eye using the back of his hand as a few tears still crept down his pale cheeks. He turned his attention back to Shizuo as he straightened up and started talking.

"First, please just calm down. I'm not that good with tears so please just don't cry."

Izaya bit his lip to stop the tears that threatened to spill over and onto his face before giving up and moving his arm to wipe them away, but before he could the blonde that was sitting in front of him bent down and licked the tears away slowly and… 'sexily…' the raven stared up at Shizuo, half in shock and the other half in surprise, there was even a little lust in there.

He saw the mocha eyes that melted into his crimson ones, he felt strong arms wrap around his waist and pull him toward the blonde in a tight hug, and he felt Shizuo's lips against his head as he made soft calming sounds. Before he knew it the tears coming from Izaya's eyes had stopped and dried.

Shizuo pulled back and gave Izaya a small smile before reaching to grab one of his hands.

'He… he looks like that time… in my dream… when we were together, when we were happy, when he really loved me.'

Izaya returned the act with a shy smile while trying to maintain eye contact with the handsome man in front of him.

"So, when you said stuff about waking up from your dream… would you mind telling me about it?"

The raven froze for a few seconds until the blonde's eyebrows knitted together with worry.

"Are you o-"

"I-I'm fine." Izaya tried to swallow around the lump that had formed in his throat. 'I… what if he thinks I'm weird? What if he thinks I'm really really crazy? I… don't really wanna tell him…'

"Do you want to tell me about it? If you don't that's okay to…" The blonde sitting in front of him was being really patient, not like what he usually is like at all, it all just made Izaya more confused.

"N-nonono… I… I'll tell you about it." 'There's no getting around it, I'll just tell him and we'll be back to our old ways… fighting and chasing each-other around Ikebukuro…' The informant looked down as he took a deep breath, before telling Shizuo about what had happened in his dream.

"F-first, I'll just begin with when I woke up… I found myself in my room when I was beginning senior high-school… the day I met you…"


Shizuo was staring at Izaya, both because he thought what he just told him was weird and because he just loved looking at him.

"So that's why when you started hating me and chasing me around the whole place trying to kill me I chose to keep my feelings away, to conceal them in the deepest parts of my dark heart. But after that dream, I… I… I want to be with you, I really want to be with you forever, but it's never going to happen, stuff like happy endings never happen."

Now Izaya had finished telling Shizuo about his dream and, at the same time, confessing his love to him for all those years. He told of how he had loved and lost his most precious person, himself, Shizuo, the man sitting in front of him. 'Just like me huh…' Shizuo stopped looking at the raven weirdly as that thought went through his mind, instead he had seemed to take an interest to the bed sheets while his face started turning a little pink.

'Yeah, just like me. But I got my love back while Izaya thinks I'll just leave and that we'll go back to trying to kill each-other… Gawd I love him so much.'

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for doing all that stuff back then, I'm sorry for framing you, I'm sorry about everything, I'm sorry I was even born, I'm sorry… I'm s-sorry." Izaya started tearing up again he looked down at his lap while the salty tears fell onto the sheets that covered them.

Shizuo didn't like it when Izaya cried. He didn't like it at all. The blonde used his hand to tilt the raven's head up gently, he looked into his blood red eyes before using his other hand to grip the smaller man's shirt and pulling him in for a hot kiss.

He felt Izaya's arms wrap around his neck, deepening the kiss. The blonde let go of the informant's chin before placing it around his frail form then sliding it down to his waist.


Izaya felt Shizuo's lip crushing his, he felt the hand slide down to wrap around his torso and he felt the other's tongue prod lightly against his lips asking for entrance. It was so unexpected that the raven gasped into the kiss before feeling the other's muscle thrust into his hot mouth, Shizuo's breath tasted like strawberry milk with a tint of cinnamon and cigarettes. The blonde's tongue swept over Izaya's and Izaya, well he liked it, he moaned into the kiss for more, more of that sweetness that only the man crushing his lips could give him

And he got it.

"Mmm, I… I love you, Shizuo." The raven got those words out through the breaks in-between each passionate kiss.


Shizuo didn't say anything, he realised the use of his real name, so he just deepened the kiss pushing his tongue into every corner of Izaya's mouth. He loved it. He loved the taste of the smaller man's mouth. It tasted so bitter, but a bit sweet. He didn't know why he tasted like that since he hadn't fed him any solid food for the last five months, that was what Shinra did, he gave Izaya the nutrients he needed to survive, but the blonde was sure that nothing in the stuff he gave Izaya tasted like that mouth of his.

He wanted, no, he needed more of that wonderful bitter-sweet taste.

The blonde kept the kiss going for as long as he could, but when the couple parted they gasped in deep breaths to make up for the ones they couldn't take in-between the passionate kisses. Shizuo looked at the raven's beautiful, nearly glowing face, his mouth was slightly open gasping in the air while a thin line of saliva connected Izaya's mouth to his own. The two kept the eye contact, they kept examining the other, what they might do or what they were thinking about. It was deep into the night now and the moonlight that shone on the bed through his window made the informant's skin seem to shine it made him look magical. Now Shizuo thought about whether he was dreaming or not.

"I love you." That was the only thing the blonde said before attacking Izaya's mouth once more, he could've stayed like that forever, but the pained groan that Izaya made when Shizuo pushed him harshly onto the bed made him stop.

'Oh yeah, he only just woke up, I should call Shinra.' The blonde thought himself a little stupid to realise that going rough on Izaya was only going to hurt him more.

He went to scour the pockets on his vest and pants for his cell. Before he dialled Shinra he saw Izaya's disappointed face and chuckled.

"I'm just calling Shinra to check if I can take you over for a check-up." Izaya nodded in understanding but still had a pout on his lips, those plush pink lips… Shizuo shook his head mentally.

'I can't right now, later…'

He searched through his contacts for Shinra and called him. The blonde held the phone up to his ear while looking at Izaya, he pulled him in for a hug just as Shinra picked up on the third ring.

"Hello hello, Shizuo is something wrong? Did you rage and injure Izaya?" Even though the other's tone was happy it still held a tint of worry for his suicidal friend.

"No no, he's fine. Erm… Izaya just woke up and, well I was wondering if I could take him over for a check-up?" Shizuo still held Izaya tight in his arms, stroking his dark hair and caressing his soft skin on his arms and cheek.

"Oh really? That's great! You can come over now, just mae sure you don't bash him up on the way ok? Ok. Byeeee, c ya in a few." The line went dead and the debt collector sighed before picking up Izaya bridal style and carrying him to the bathroom. The raven held onto his neck while he was being let down, a slight blush on his cheeks, he pecked Shizuo on the cheek before undressing himself. Since Shizuo had to wash him every day for the last five months he was and unaffected by the sight of Izaya's naked body, but since he was actually conscious and naked in front of him now, he blushed a little. The raven turned on the water, waiting for the water to warm up before stepping into the bath and pulling the curtain.

"If you need help or anything just shout kay?"

"Okay."

The blonde smiled before walking out of the bathroom and into the living room. He lit a cigarette before sitting down on the couch and turning on the TV.

"Ahh, I may or may not be in love…" 'No, I think I'm definitely in love.'

Another smile crept its way onto the blonde's face, he then concentrated on the comedy that was on right now, waiting until Izaya finished showering.


Ahhhh, well that took a very long time. As of now it is the 22nd of October 7:55 pm (EST) which means that I took a very long time to write, well anyway I'm also writing a different yaoi thing… but it's not fanfic cuz they're OC's. But if I'm still living by the Christmas holidays I'll use the plot I've got and put it on a random anime/manga that I think will fit the characters best and make it an AU *sigh*

Well anyway back to 'I was broken'. It's been soo long guys so sorry for the wait and especially when my fanfic hit 3000 views I was still here sitting on my butt, stuck on one of the kissing scenes. Sorry guys.

Hehem, now I will thank EVERYBODYYYYY who has continued to read 'I was Broken' I…I'm just so happy *insert tear*, thanks for the reviews and sorry for the wait to those who are following. I'm going to finish it either next week by writing a really long chapter or sometime in a fortnight or two.

My yearly's are coming up and I still need to hand in so many essays and assignments I have no time to cram and I have f-ing Saturday classes for f-ing Chinese, no offence to all of them (I'm Chinese tooo) China's got nice food… so yea I have these random classes which stop me from writing fanfic. Well I hope you enjoyed it.

Izaya: Don't push it too hard ok. I want to be with Shizu-chan more but I don't want you tiring yourself out.

Mercy: No, I'm going to try keep my deadline even though I'm already one day late on my first week into school. I must force more Shizuo onto you so I can prove that he loves you.

Shizuo: Then how about I just say I love him.

Mercy & Izaya: You'd do that?

Shizuo: Tch no, I'm never going to say anything like that, everrrrr.

Mercy: Well that's too bad, you did earlier and since I'm the one writing it I'm going to make you say it even more.

Shizuo: *breaks laptop*

Mercy: That's fine I have everything on my USB's and I'll just use my other laptop to type.

Shizuo: F***

Izaya: Watch your language Shizu-chan, swearing is a nono.

Shizuo: *walks out of room*

Mercy: Hey, chase him for me will you?

Izaya: Hai haiiii! *rushes after him.

*The two start fighting*

*Shizuo pins Izaya down*

Mercy: *watches intently* More inspiration. Thank you and thank you hehe.

~ Mercy ~