Sam rolled over in bed and reached his arm to pull her close to him, but when his arm couldn't find the body he was searching for he lifted his head and sighed when he realized he was alone in bed.

"Andy, come back to bed!" stretched and grinned while he called out to her, when she didn't answer him he called again.

"Andy?" He got out of bed and pulled on his jeans and walked out in the hall, the first thing he noticed was that her shoes were gone. He furrowed his eyebrows and went to get his phone in the bedroom, he got even more worried when it went to voicemail. He went to his kitchen to look for a note and when he saw the notepad on the counter he felt relief that vanished when he walked closer and saw that there was no note. He tried to call her once again but it still went to voicemail.

Andy sat at the same beach her father went to when he was upset, crying her heart out and cursing at herself because she got burned again. When she found out that Luke cheated on her she didn't cry, not once, but this stung, and the reason why is because she loved Sam. Like really loved him. She thought back to her first day on patrol with Sam, he told her he was only staying until a spot opens up for him, and the her thoughts drifted to the day she got shot when he told her she was the one holding her back. They never got the chance to talk about it, if he was serious or just being the normal Sam he is. Even if he would shoot down an opportunity like that for her she didn't feel right about it, she didn't want to keep him from his dreams.

But the thing that hurt the most of it was the fact he hadn't told her, and those forms were signed and dated from the day his family was here. And to even bother getting forms like that signed meant he had already taken the opportunity. The tears fell faster down her cheeks, and she hugged her knees and bent her head down, letting all of her emotions flood free.

After a little while she left, knowing that Sam would probably come looking for here there. She went to the address she had scribbled down earlier and met with the landlord.

Sam had spent all afternoon looking for her without any luck, no one seemed to know where she was, and he certainly couldn't understand why. He just hoped she would be at the station ready for her shift, he didn't dare to think about what if she wasn't.

He stood filling his travel mug with coffee, and when he saw the notepad he opened the drawer to put it back and that's when all the pieces fell together. He closed his eyes and let his head drop, silently begging her not to run.


"Hi girl! Wooah woah! What happened?" The smile Traci had on her lips when Andy first walked in the locker room fell when she saw the bloodshot eyes and sad face on her friend. Andy took a deep breath to force back the tears she felt pressing behind her eyes. Traci immediately wrapped her arms around her and rubbed her back up and down.

"Can I come with you after shift?" She whispered out into Traci`s ear. Traci pulled back and looked at her with a worried look.

"Of course honey, but we are talking about this." Andy just nodded and hugged her again.

When Sam came to parade he relieved to see her sitting in front, only for a second, he knew he had probably screwed things up. She didn't turn once to look at him, he saw her sighed when Best paired them together. After parade he waited for the others to get out there and when he saw her walking hurriedly out with them he called her name out, and everybody except from her turned.

He jogged out to the cruiser and around to the passenger seat and opened the door.

"You could at least have left me a note, I was worried to death!" He felt angry, but he knew his rage was mostly on himself.

"Yeah, and you could have told me you were leaving!" She looked at him with tears in her eyes, blinking furiously to not let them fall. He kneeled in front of her and touched her thighs.

"Andy… I`m not, I was but I`m not, I`m turning it down."

"Don't, you should go."

"Andy, you don't…"

"Sam, don't! You should take it, it`s not like we are anything anyway!" Sam was taken aback by her words, it felt like someone stabbed him in his chest.

"No going back." His eyes where begging her, but she refused to look him in the eyes.

"Yeah well, people change their minds." Sam`s jaw tightened and he squinted his eyes closed, when he got to his feet he kicked the trashcan next to the cruiser.

"Fuck!" Andy jumped at his reaction, but didn't look at him.

No one of them said a word to each other the rest of the shift, they didn't even look at each other. And as soon as the cruiser was parked Sam was the first one out of the car, walking fast in to the locker rooms. She mentally kicked herself before she followed and went to the women's locker room.


She and Traci laid in bed at Traci`s after working a long night shift, Traci was stroking Andy`s hair while Andy was finding the courage to tell what happened.

"I found an apartment, It`s ready for me to move in tomorrow."

"That`s good." Traci wasn't going to push, she knew Andy needed time to tell her what happened.

"Yeah." She felt the tears pressing and couldn't hold them back any longer.

Tears fell down Andy`s cheeks again, and Traci pulled her close.

"He`s going under."

"What? I thought you guys…" Traci sat up in bed looking down at her friend with a confused look on her face.

"We`re not, he said he was going to turn it down, but I told him not to." She wiped the heel of her palms under her eyes.

"Andy, that's not fair."

"Are you taking his side?" She sat up next to Traci and felt aggravated by Traci, but she knew she was right.

"You`re running!" Traci shouted it out in a frustrated voice, and threw her hands up.

"Trace.."

"Look, I know you. I have never seen you happier than you have been the previous week, and I know you two care for each other. I can`t promise you that Sam won't hurt, but I can promise you that if you don't take a risk with him you will regret it!" Andy sighed and pulled the covers over her head.


Sam stood in parade staring at the floor when she walked by him and took her seat, she looked just as bad as he did and that pleased him in some wicked way. Two days had gone by since she left, and their talk. He missed her, missed having her stuff all over his house, missed her walking around in his clothes, missed going to bed and waking up with her, missed her talking, missed her kisses, missed her smell and hell he even missed her overthinking.

"Nash-Williams, Shaw-McNally, Peckstein and Diaz in front desk." Both Sam and Andy where surprised by not being paired together, but at the same time they were relived.

"Serve, protect and don't screw up! Swarek, my office." Sam looked up and around the room and saw Boyd leaning at the door to the parade room, grinning at him. He saw Andy trying to cover up the hurt in her expression that appeared when she saw Boyd, when she walked out of parade with Shaw. Sam followed Best and Boyd into Best`s office, and saw Andy with the coffee stand stealing glances at the office.

"Here is your cover story." Boyd gave him a file and crossed his arms over his chest and sat back in the chair next to Sam`s. Sam flipped briefly trough the file, and then closed in and placed it on Best`s desk.

"Actually, I need some time to think about this." Sam pinched the bridge of his nose and squinted his eyes. Best were surprised by Sam`s words, but he could see where this was coming from.

"No way, you already agreed, you are the best for this UC." Boyd stood up and started to pace the room, shouting out the words to Sam.

"Some things changed in the last couple of weeks, Boyd." Sam also started to pace the room, and shouting out to Boyd.

"Sammy, I don't care, you are doing this."

"Boyd, he has a right to decide for himself." Best stood up, demanding everyone to calm down, Boyd went to look out the windows to the bull pen and saw Andy pouring coffee.

"You have until tomorrow to give me an answer." He barked at him.

"That's generous, thanks." Sam replied in a sarcastic tone and stood up to his feet. Boyd handed him the file and gave him a look, Sam took it and went out of the office.

Andy saw him bouncing down the step with the file in his hand, and she hurriedly got out with two coffees in hand blinking tears away. Sam walked into the D`s office to talk to Jerry about the case.

Luke snorted at him as he walked in and sat down on Jerry`s desk.

"I tried to warn her about you, you know." Luke stood up and walked over to a shelf to get a box of files. Jerry`s arched his eyebrows and Sam let out a breath and glared at him. Luke stood with his back laughing to himself.

"Yeah?" Sam stood to his feet and walked to stand in the middle of the room, Jerry quickly got up, ready to jump in, something he could tell he would have to do.

"Yeah, and soon she will realize what a mistake it was to leave me, so I guess I should thank you Sammy!" Luke walked up to him and patted him on the shoulder. Sam looked down at his hand, rage filling up his veins, clenching his fist in Luke`s shirt shoving him up to a wall.

"You stay the fuck away from her!" Jerry was quick to pull Sam away from him, all the way out of the office. They heard Luke laughing inside, while Sam was pacing outside and cursing under his breath. Luckily for Sam no one saw the incident in the office.

When Oliver and Andy walked in to the station towards their desks to finish up the day, Sam cornered them.

"McNally, can I have a sec?" Andy looked between the two men, shifting her weight from leg to leg.

"See you at the penny." Oliver winked at Andy and patted Sam`s back while he brushed pass them.

"Please?" The look in his eyes made Andy`s tears press again, she blinked them away and just nodded at him. He put a hand on the small of her back, sending shivers through her spine, and guided her to the viewing room. Andy was torn between herself, one part of her wanted to throw herself in his strong arms and the other wanted to let him go. She thought back to something Dov had told Chris way back. If you love someone set it free, if it comes back to you it was meant to be, if not... She sat down at the table in the middle of the room, avoiding his eyes.

"Andy…" Sam`s mouth fell open and closed again, several times, he didn't even know what to tell her. Mostly he just wanted to take her home. She looked up into his eyes and she couldn't hold back the tears that were pressing. Sam wiped them away with his thumb and had a sad expression on his face.

"I`ll stay if you want me to." He leaned his forehead down on hers, looking into her eyes.

"I don't want you too." The side that wanted to let him go won the argument, and she jumped off the table to leave the room. Sam pocketed his hands and stared up at the ceiling, gritting his teeth.


He was sitting in the penny with Oliver when the rookies walked in, he tried to meet her eyes but she avoided him by walking by Chris side, blocking Sam`s vision of her. He shot back the glass of scotch in one gulp, earning himself a surprised look from Oliver.

"You ok, buddy?" Sam looked at him and gave him a half-laugh and a half-snort and just turned to motion for the bartender for another one.

Andy tried to laugh with her friends, tried not to look at him and tried her best to put on a happy face. Traci rubbed her hand up her back and gave her a genuine smile.

Luke and Jerry walked into the penny, Jerry walked over to Sam and Oliver while Luke walked over to the rookies, Sam watched like a hawk.

"Andy, can we talk?" He stood in front of her, being eyed up by all the other rookies. Andy felt empty just empty, she figured she might just get this over with once and for all. She took a long swig at her beer and put it back down at the table, got to her feet and let Luke walk her out the backdoor of the penny.

Sam arched his eyebrows in surprise, emptied his glass and scratched the back of his head. Thoughts about him being just a rebound for her appeared in his head, deep down he knew it was silly, but those facts were overpowered by other the other thoughts. He thought back to her words earlier. I don't want you to. He pulled up his phone from his pocket and dialed the number.

"Boyd, I`m in."


It is with fear I am publishing this, I even broke my own heart writing it.

Hope it doesnt take me too long to get the next one ready.

I would love you guys opinion! :)