When Prowl got to Jazz's quarters, he tried the door, realizing it was locked with a frown. He typed in the security passcode and let himself in quietly. He almost didn't see Jazz hunched over on the floor in the corner of the room, arms wrapped around his knees, faceplates buried in his arms, shoulders shaking silently.
He stared for almost a full minute, his processor uncomprehending. Jazz can't be crying….he's Jazz! Jazz doesn't….Jazz can't….Oh, Primus what have I done?
Out loud he whispered, awestruck, "Jazz?"
The saboteur raised his helm slowly and said in a hoarse voice, "Prowl? What're you….why ya in my room?" He swiped at his optics beneath his visor quickly, hoping Prowl wouldn't notice, but nothing ever got past that bot.
"Jazz." He sunk down on his knees next to him, reaching out to hug him as Jazz nearly fell into the embrace, "Primus, I didn't- I'm so sorry, my Jazz. I took this too far."
Jazz practically choked with happiness when Prowl called him 'my Jazz', almost bursting into tears again, "No, Prowler...it's my fault for startin' that whole thing. I shouldnta pushed ya so much if I knew ya wasn't ready."
"Thank you for apologizing." Prowl hugged him closer, "And for the energon candies. And for being an amazing boyfriend." He sighed a small breath against Jazz's cheek, "I'm so sorry I upset you so much. I didn't think- I mean you're always so cheerful. I didn't think you could get so down."
"It's the only downfall tah bein' so upbeat and happy all the time." Jazz sniffled and snuggled into Prowl's shoulder, "When I crash, I crash hard."
Prowl smiled, "But then I get to take care of you when you crash." They were both silent for a moment, and Prowl pulled the packet of energon candis out of his subspace, absent-mindedly offering Jazz one.
They both popped them in their mouths at the same time, and began chewing slowly, making pained faces until they caught optic-contact. "Sour" They choked out and then started laughing hysterically
"Primus, Prowler." Jazz gasped, practically restored to his normal self, "I missed you so much."
"I missed you too Jazz." Prowl laughed
"Can I ask you somethin'?" Jazz said once they had calmed down
"Depends what it is." Prowl said warily
"It's not tah ask if ya love me, 'cuz I'm almost sure ya do...maybe." Jazz sighed, "But if ya do….why doncha wanna tell me? Ya don't gotta answer if ya don't wanna, by the way. It's just somethin' I've been wonderin'."
Prowl leaned his helm back, "Jazz, what do you think would happen if I told you I loved you?"
Jazz raised an optic ridge, "I'd be so excited I'd pee myself?"
Prowl cracked a smile, "I meant eventually. What would happen eventually?"
Jazz was silent for a moment and then, "I would want to bond with you."
"Exactly." Prowl snapped his digits, "You would say to me, 'Prowler, why can't we bond, if ya love me, an' ah love ya?'."
"I do not sound like that." Jazz stuck his glossa out at him
"Psssh." Prowl grinned, getting to his peds and helping Jazz up, "You sound exactly like that."
"So why would it be bad if we bonded?"
"It's because…" Prowl sighed and said quietly, "It's because I want you to always be happy, Jazz. I want you to always be your sparkly, upbeat self. And if anything...if anything happens to me, I want you to be able to move on. You wouldn't be able to move on if I offlined and we were bonded; you'd be devastated. Forever."
There was a silence and then Jazz said roughly, "Prowl, do you honestly think for even one damn second that if ya offlined, right now, today, that I wouldn't be devastated? Forever?"
Jazz closed his optics when Prowl gave him a confused stare, "Primus, ya really do think that. Okay, let's do a little 'what if?' imaginin'. Let's say ya died today. For the first, I dunno, year or two, I'd be a complete wreck. I'm talkin' lockin' myself in my room, not eatin', not rechargin', bawlin' my optics out like a sparkling, the works."
Seeing Prowl's horrified expression, he added, "No self-offline attempts yet though, 'cuz I'd know you'd be mad at me fer that. Then maybe year three I'd learn how to pretend to have a normal life. I'd go about my routines, do my work, eat and recharge. But I'd be dead inside. There'd be no more happy Jazz high fivin' bots in the hallways. I wouldn't be out on the dancefloor, swayin' my hips tah my favorite song. I would be-man I dunno what I would be, a zombie I guess. Anyways,k this could go on fer years, this zombie-Jazz, until eventually I just wouldn't be able to take it anymore, bein' without ya. So I'd offline myself or have somebot do it for me."
"So." He crossed his arms, "That is my sad, sad life without you in it. No pressure."
Prowl simply stared at him, blinking his optics a few times. Finally, he said something that completely surprised the scrap out of Jazz. He placed a servo over the saboteur's spark and gazed up at him, "Bond with me."
"What?" Jazz whispered, awed, "Prowl, ya don't gotta-"
"Just let me explain." Prowl sighed, leaning his helm against the saboteur's chassis, "You keep apologizing for pushing me to tell you I love you, that you felt bad because you thought I wasn't ready." Prowl rubbed his thumb digit across Jazz's cheek, smiling softly, "I'm so sorry if I misled you, but I have always been ready. Pretty much since we started dating, I've wanted to tell you how much I love you. Everyday, every time I see you I've wanted to say it so bad."
"Really?" Jazz squeaked happily, "Me too! How did ya...keep it inside?"
"You know me." Prowl said wearily, "I'm good at hiding my emotions." There was a silence and then Prowl exhaled, "Jazz?"
"Yeah?"
"I love you." Prowl said firmly, watching Jazz's face melt with happiness
"Dammit Prowler." Jazz laughed, swiping at the tears of happiness leaking from his optics, "Yer makin' me have such an emotional day. Naw, scratch that, an emotional week!"
Prowl laughed and his shoulders relaxed, "Uggh it feels so good to finally say it. I just want to say it over and over again. I love you, Jazz. I love you, I love you, I love you, I-"
Jazz interrupted him with a fervent kiss, pressing him up against the wall. "I love you too Prowl." He gasped between kisses, "I love you so much."
"Jazz." Prowl moaned into his mouth. He propelled the saboteur backwards to his berth and slid on top of him, fingering the seams in his armour.
"Prow-wl!" Jazz arched underneath him when the tactician's careful digits hit a sensitive node, "Primus, ya really know how tah get me worked up, doncha mech?"
Prowl hmmd, "Too bad we're not interfacing tonight."
"...We're not?"
He grinned a little, "We have more important things to do."
Jazz was silent for a moment, "Prowl, I didn't mean tah guilt ya into anything with that whole spiel. This don't have tah happen right now, if ya don't want it to."
Prowl closed his optics, leaning his forehelm against Jazz's, "Primus, Jazz you have no idea how much I want to. How much I have wanted to, for a long time now. But I didn't let myself be selfish because I didn't want you to be destroyed if anything happened to me. But if you would be that devastated if I offlined, regardless of whether we're bonded, " He sighed and opened his optics, the teal staring into Jazz's cobalt blue, "Then it seems the only thing to do is to bond with you and make both of us deliriously happy. And try to avoid offlining."
Jazz smiled happily, "Ya really wanna bond with me, Prowler?"
"There is no one in the entire universe I would rather bond with than you Jazz." Prowl kissed him softly, cupping Jazz's faceplates in his servos.
As the kiss became more passionate, Jazz slid his servo down Prowl's chassis to the outer plating of his spark chamber. "Open?" He keened and Prowl complied, his intakes hitching as Jazz's servo slid into his spark chamber and began caressing his spark.
"Ohhhhhh Jazz" He sighed, tilting his helm back; Jazz's servos were so careful to trace every part of his spark, a feeling both relaxing and pleasurable.
"Prowler?" Jazz questioned and Prowl opened his optics to find the saboteur with his spark chamber open, blushing vividly, "Ya wanna um-"
Prowl interrupted him by grabbing his collar plate and yanking him to him in a rough kiss, their chassis' crashing together. Their sparks began to hum in unison as they rubbed together, starting to merge as the two mechs cried out.
"Ja-Jazz!" Prowl almost screamed as a huge wave of pleasure washed over them as their sparks became one, realizing that Jazz was also moaning his name beneath him as he bucked under the final overload.
With their sparks merged, Prowl slumped onto the berth next to Jazz, panting. He cast a glance at the mech next to him, beautiful in his pleasured daze and thought lovingly, My Jazz. What did I ever do to deserve a mech like you?
He was drifting into recharge when the last thing he heard was Jazz's voice in his processor saying, "Ya didn't have tah do nothin' Prowler. I'm just lucky tah have ya love me as much as I love you."
