A/N - I'd like to start by apologising about how long it has take me to update. School has started again and the work just takes over your life. But Part 9 is here in all its unglory, and i promise the next parts will definitely (hopefully) not take as long to update. Thank you so much for sticking with me and reviewing/alerting this story. You have no idea how fantastic you all are and how much you make me smile. I love you all. Klisses!
Part 9
"Is this thing working?"
"Can he hear us?"
"Stop pushing me, he can't see you."
"Would you guys shut up for five seconds? Blaine? You there?"
Stifling a laugh, Blaine let the love he felt for them seep through in his voice, "Yeah I'm here. And I can hear you. But who's the you?"
Wes's commanding voice shushed them again and said, his voice sounding slightly tinny over the phone, "David, Nick, Jeff, Thad. Oh and me of course."
"Hey guys." He giggled down at the phone as a chorus of mismatched hellos were yelled at him, plus a half garbled argument between Nick and Jeff as to who got to talk to him first.
"I'm guessing this isn't a social call Blaine, since you wanted us all together, is something wrong?" David's mellow voice asked.
Guilt bloomed in his chest, he really wasn't seeing as much of his Dalton friends as he should. With the transfer to McKinnley, homework, glee rehearsals and the accident, he was lucky if he'd seen the Warblers four times in the last two months, "I miss you guys."
Jeff and Nick wooped in delight and girlishly said, "Oh Blaine we miss you too. Oh we do. Oh Blaine weeee miiisss yooouuuu!"
Stupidly he reached out to ruffle their hair reflexively and dropped his hand when he realised they weren't really there. Instead he said sorrowfully, "I mean it you muppets. But you're right David, I need advice, or help, or just well you guys."
"What's up?" Nick asked, the joking put aside but Blaine swore he heard Jeff mumble 'Doc' at the end.
"It's Kurt. He...well he remembered. I was so close to him. He was right there. I almost had him back."
"Wait what are you talking about? He remembered?" Excitement filled Thad's voice.
Blaine smiled, they had all loved Kurt too, "Kind of. He remembers teenage dream."
"Oh God how did he react?"
Pausing, Blaine realised he actually didn't know how to tell them. Everything had been messy and quick words and emotions and then Kurt was next to him almost kissing him. He shook his head and tried to explain, "He was scared? Angry? Hurt I didn't go back to see him. But then he almost believed me. He believed I loved him. He was going to kiss me."
"What do you mean was?" piped in Wes, awakening Blaine from his Kurt fill haze.
Mumbling quietly, Blaine answered, "Well I though he was, his lips were so close, did I tell you he smells amazing?"
"Yes, several times. A day." Jeff said sarcastically, but continued, "Again what do you mean by was? Didn't he?"
Fury knotted within him and he clenched his fists remembering how Kurt had jumped from him like he was possessed and shoved away from him. And the blotchiness on Karofsky's matched the anger that burned in his eyes, but when he went to open his mouth, Rachel and Mercedes had burst through the auditorium door, looking for Kurt and himself.
"We were worried about you, did you not like the song?" Rachel asked indignantly.
Throwing a despairing glance at her, Mercedes looked at him seriously, "Is something wrong Kurt? I thought you'd be happy after what you said..."
Swallowing, Kurt had smiled falsely and said, "I was just taken aback that's all. It's a lot to take in. In fact, if you all don't mind, I'm going to go get some air."
"Do you want me to come with you?" Four voices had chimed in. Blaine shot a furious look at Karofsky who made a 'bring it' motion. Before he could actually act on his impulse to wipe the smirk off Karofsky's face, Kurt laughed and answered, "No. I need to be alone for a few minutes. Honestly, I'll be okay, you go on in. David don't talk to Blaine like that and get back to class. I'll be back inside the auditorium in ten minutes tops. Seriously. Go. I need a diva moment."
And with one last lingering look at Blaine, he walked around the corridor and out of sight.
"Blaine, you still there?"
"Yeah, sorry. Thinking."
"You do too much of that. So what happened to make lover boy not kiss you?"
"That complete asshole Karofsky interrupted us and then Kurt got flustered and Rachel and Mercedes came to find us. The moment just got totally ruined. And then he went away. He said he needed a minute alone. He asked us not to follow him. I think he had his phone out." Blaine cursed the rotten timing, he'd had his Kurt back and it had been taken from him again.
"Hard luck man. But he's remembering, that's a good sign right?" Nick said hopefully.
"Yeah. But what if it takes him as long to believe me as it took me to realise I was in love with him? How am I supposed to wait?" he knew he was whining, but it was a serious fear. He'd been so blinded that it had taken him months to figure out what Kurt had seen in the first few seconds.
"You love him don't you?"
Blaine scoffed, half insulted by the question, his love wouldn't change."Of course I do"
"Then you put up with the wait." Wes said simply, and Blaine knew the rest of them would be nodding away beside him.
"And no offence Blaine but Kurt's always been a bit quicker than you when I comes to the whole love thing. Just be patient." Jeff pitched in helpfully, the insult covered by the advice. Barely.
"But how?" He was exasperated, tired and wanted to kiss his boyfriend again. He wanted to order their coffee order and laugh at Kurt's despair with his inability to tie his new black tie properly. He wanted 'courage', 'porcelain', 'puppy', and 'baby penguin' joke texts again. Kurt. That was what he wanted.
"Just be there for him, make him remember. Obviously singing has triggered something. Why don't you do more of that? We know how much you love the mike." said Nick cheekily.
"Shut it you."
And then it struck him. God, it was brilliant. Why hadn't he thought of it before. It was crazy mind you. But it would certainly make Kurt feel something, although whether it would be shock, confusion or love, he didn't know. But it was so out there it might just work. He had to try.
"I think I've got something. But it's totally mental and I'll need you to round up the rest of 'The Pips'." they all laughed at the nickname they'd adopted, "You'll all need to come round to mines tonight. Can you manage that?"
Nick made a choked noise of disgust, "Can a warbler sing? What are you thinking of Blaine?"
"You'll find out tonight. I need to go. Six at mine. Be there with the guys. See you."
"Blaine, wait don't you hang - " But Blaine was already hanging up the phone and rushing back into the auditorium. The quicker school was over, the quicker he would be with his best friends again, and one step closer to having Kurt back.
This was going to be one hell of a night.
"Kurt, is something wrong?"
"Are you busy? Do you have time to talk?" Kurt asked quietly, shivering slightly in the cool breeze sweeping around his body.
"I always have time for you, what's up?"
He smiled and thanked the stars again for having such an amazing parent, "I needed to talk to you Dad."
"What's wrong Kurt? Has something happened? Is it that Karofsky kid, cause I swear I will -" Burt sounded like he was ready to hang up the phone and come to McKinnely right now so Kurt cut him off, "No Dad it's not David, it's Blaine."
Sounding much more relieved, Burt asked, "What about Blaine, son?"
And at the fondness in his Dad's voice for him, Kurt snapped inside. Tears welled up and threatened to spill over, and the ache in his chest grew even more prominent. His dad loved Blaine, or at least he had a liking that surpassed any other friend of Kurt's he had met. Blaine was telling the truth.
The words came tumbling out of his mouth, unsurely at first and getting near hysterical at the end. He told his dad everything. How much he wanted to just give in to the part of him that knew Blaine, and how much he still wanted to fight against it because he wanted to know everything first. He was frightened. Of being vulnerable, or being used, of being hurt. But he felt safe in Blaine's arms.
And Burt listened, gently encouraging him when it all became to much. It felt amazing to have told someone, it didn't feel like it was squashing him anymore. Kurt took deep shuddering breaths when he had finished.
"Kurt, I'm sorry this happened to you. I hate that you have barely any idea what's been going on these past months. But if you are looking for someone to help you through it, it's Blaine. He's good for you Kurt. Yes, you've had ups and downs with him, but he's been there for you. And he will continue to be there for you. I can't tell you what to do Kurt, if you want to wait until you know more about the boy then you do that. But don't shut him out. This has been tough on him too. You should have seen him when you were in surgery. He cares about you Kurt, even if you're not ready to accept that yet."
He was scared though, what if he messed up. What if Blaine couldn't love who he was now, if he only loved the memory of him. "But Dad, how am I supposed to let him in when he knows Kurt, the one before this accident. I'm not him." he said defeated, in a small voice.
Burt let out something between a sigh and a snort, "Yes you are. Everything you went through, how you handled it, who you became, that's all in you. You just need to find it."
Everyone kept saying this, that he was this person. Kurt didn't feel like he was this special person they all kept telling him he was, he was just a silly high school boy with a blank mind. How was he supposed to be himself, when he didn't know who he was. "How Dad?"
"Well you remembered meeting Blaine from him singing to you, didn't you?" asked Burt
Not exactly but seeing him sing obviously triggered a memory that hadn't been there before, "Sort of."
"Why don't you sing then. Sing to him, sing to your friends. Music is a huge part of who you are Kurt, maybe it will heal you."
His dad seemed to find ways to be the smartest person Kurt knew while being totally clueless when it came to everything else. He was right. But still Kurt argued for the doubt that was coursing through him.
"I just want to know myself. I want to know who my boyfriend is. I want to remember."
"Don't you think that everyone in your life wants the same thing. Don't you think Blaine wants that." Burt's voice was laced with frustration at his stubborn son. How couldn't he see that he had the strength within him to do this, to fix himself? "I love you Kurt, but you really need to stop moping and do something. Sing. Dance. Remember."
"It's not that easy." Kurt wailed.
"Have you tried? No. Try. Be the young man I know you are. Be that man for me, be it for Blaine, be it for yourself."
What if he couldn't do it. What if he wasn't good enough. What if...
Are you seriously going to not try because you are scared of what if's? You're acting like a child. Man up. You are Kurt Elizabeth Hummel. You are the best singer in Glee. You are the most fashionable person at school. And you are going to be on Broadway. These are things you know. You also have people who love you. And one of them is Blaine. You know this. Now believe it. Get back in there and make yourself remember. You can do this.
"I've got to go Kurt, but please try. I'm here always if you need me. I love you son. Be brave." Burt urged his brilliant son, trying to put through how much he really did love him. Not that Kurt didn't know it.
His dad was right. He was the best dad he could have asked for. "I love you too Dad. Thank you."
And while hanging up the phone and hurrying back into school, Kurt ran through song lyrics in his head.
I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.
"This isn't going to be perfect, I know how shocked you'll be by me saying that," he said, smiling at Rachel who just laughed quietly, "But I just hope you all like it. It's going to be tough, the next little while, but I know I have friends and support in each of you. I'm trying. I'll be back. Just you watch me."
The music stared quietly, Brad playing soft chords on the piano. Kurt steady himself, found the calm within him and began to sing,
"Shadows fill an empty heart as love is fading,
From all the things that we are but are not saying,
Can we see beyond the stars and make it to the dawn?"
His dad was right, singing made him happy, brought him a sense of Kurt that he had forgotten. He look around at each member of the Glee Club in turn, making sure that they all knew how much he appriacted them, despite their flaws and their past. But continually his eyes met with Blaine's and the look of wonder and love, warmed Kurt right to the bones.
"Change the colours of the sky and open up to,
The ways you made me feel alive, the ways I loved you.
For all the things that never died, to make it through the night,
Love will find you."
The Glee Club knew that this song, no matter what Kurt said, was for Blaine, and they melted into the background as Kurt sang out the chorus staring into Blaine's eyes, a part of him laughing at the irony of his 'what if worries.
"What about now? What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it's too late, what about now?"
Kurt let Blaine see him, finally letting him into the confusion, pain, fear and hope he was feeling. Let it seep through his voice and show in his flushed features. Blaine was rooted in awe and adoration to his chair, not even registering the squeeze on the shoulder from Finn.
"The sun is breaking in your eyes, to start a new day.
This broken heart can still survive with a touch of your grace.
Shadows fade into the light, I am by your side where love will find you.
What about now? What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?"
His soul, mind and voice were free, he was flying. He needed music, it was in him. And he was sharing it, with Blaine mostly. Tears were rolling down Blaine's cheeks as he watched his beautiful boyfriend fight for what was lost. He would never lose Blaine. He swore he wouldn't, and if Kurt was ready to try, there was nothing that would stop Blaine from being with him.
"Baby before it's to late,
What about now? Now that we're here, now that we've come this far, just hold on.
There is nothing to fear, for I am right beside you, for all my life,
I am yours."
Kurt's eyes widened as Blaine sang with to him, his powerful lower voice blending perfectly into Kurt's countertenor. Just like in his dream. It was perfect. They finished the song together.
"What about now? What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
What about now? What about today?
What if your making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it's too late.
Baby, before it's too late.
Baby, before it's too late.
What about now?"
The question hung between them as the rest of the Glee Club burst into appualuse. Which grew as Blaine hesitantly went up and hugged Kurt.
Maybe the song hadn't triggered a memory, but it had given Kurt the courage that he needed to face his fears and tackle his memories. He needed to trust himself. Blaine was there, waiting patiently for him. He wasn't going to throw himself into a relationship with him, but Kurt could at least give a proper friendship a try. And, when his memories came back, he'd probably love Blaine even more.
So he hugged him back, whispering, "I'm going to try." into his ear.
"And I'll help. I'm not going anywhere Kurt. And I have something planned for you that will maybe help you understand us better."
Kurt pulled back and was swept away again in those wonderful hazel eyes, "What is it?"
Blaine smirked and fixed a stray hair on Kurt's head back into place, "You'll just have to wait and see."
A/N - thank you so much again, and p.s i love reviews :D (hint, hint) you guys rock!
