Why A Heart Beats

"Kurosaki, the reason I put some distance between us wasn't to hurt you, I did it because I didn't want Aizen knowing about you. I never wanted you to be involved in this." Grimmjow answered, now looking at the ground.

"…"

"If I don't do what he says, he'll come after my family, you, your friends, and even your family. I-I can't afford to turn him down."

Grimmjow's face was darkened by his own shadow. The sky was beginning to brighten behind him, making it harder for Ichigo to see his features. He then realized that he had barely seen the other's face at all the entire time. It was as though he was hiding it from him. Suddenly, the sky lit up in a fierce display of lighting, allowing him to see it clearly. He was shocked from the bruises it carried.

"Gr-grimmjow, what happened to your face? Did-did he do that to you?"

"This is nothing okay. Look, I need to get back to school. Come with me."

"Why? It's after nine o'clock. Besides, I-I need to clean you up a little."

"My car…urgh…is there." He groaned when the boy's hand touched his cheek.

"No, you need to-"

"I'm going Kurosaki!"

Why was he so damned stubborn all the time? This entire situation was dangerous territory, but he just couldn't abandon Grimmjow when he needed him the most. Giving into the bluenette's insistence, Ichigo led him out of the park and they slowly made their way to the school. Their walk was tense, silent, and slightly uncomfortable until Ichigo decided to mention the situation with a question.

"What was that?" Grimmjow asked angrily.

"I asked you why you would work for someone like Aizen. I mean, you're rich and all. You didn't need his money right?"

"My parents are rich Kurosaki, not me. My dad cut me off a long time ago. He didn't approve of my spending habits, so he stopped giving me money."

"Spending habits?"

"Fucking drugs and prostitutes!" he yelled.

If Ichigo didn't know any better, he would think Grimmjow was actually ashamed about that.

"Oh… So you went to Aizen to get those things?"

"I got paid regularly, so yea. I even a small cut of the drugs too, at a price…"

That last part was somewhat unexpected. However, it wasn't too surprising. Aizen looked quite manipulative and coldhearted. Still, what price did he have to pay?

Looking over to the nearly broken man walking beside him, he could take a good guess. The mere idea made him become increasingly upset, especially due to the state Grimmjow was in right now. That alone was all the motivation he needed to raise his next question.

"What price Grimmjow?"

"…"

"Answer my question."

"I-I did some favors for Aizen and some of his associates when instructed. Things I'm not proud of."

"…That's pretty vague. It really doesn't tell me anything."

"Sexual favors okay! I was nothing but a damned sex toy when I wasn't out selling his fucking merchandise. I got the money I needed by selling his shit and the drugs I wanted by sucking and fucking all right! Does that tell you something?" he spoke, anger evident in his voice.

"I-I didn't-"

"Yeah? Well now you know." He interrupted.

"Don't attack me Grimmjow!"

The bluenette looked away furiously. Ichigo did the same, now just as angry. Honestly! It wasn't his fault the things in his past happened. He had just met him this year for crying out loud! He reluctantly looked back at him again before sighing. This was definitely a handful.

After they rounded a corner, Grimmjow took a breath and spoke. "Look, I'm sorry Kurosaki. I…I just don't wanna talk about what happened in the past. Things were pretty shitty back then, but I've changed. I've even been clean for the past five months."

Ichigo looked at him calculatingly for a moment before he responded. "I-I believe you Grimmjow. You're not your past, and the future isn't written in stone. It's never too late to make a change. Or at least, that's what I believe." He smiled.

"I never meant for any of this to happen." Grimmjow sighed, looking downcast.

That was definitely an expression Ichigo wasn't used to seeing on the other's face. It truly didn't fit him at all. But if this was enough to bring someone like him down, then he could only guess that things must be pretty bad. The thought frightened him a little.

"We'll be okay Grimm. I promise." He tried, only earning a weary smile from the other.

When the two reached the school, Grimmjow quickened his pace to the student parking lot. When he arrived at the gate, he was relieved to see that his car was still intact. When Ichigo reached the parking lot, he walked through the gates and quickly made his way over to Grimmjow. He jumped when the bluenette suddenly became outraged.

"Fucking hell!" he shouted.

There were three problems with his car. One: he had received a ticket. Two: there was a dusty footprint on his door. And three: he couldn't remember where he had left his keys.

"FUUUCK!" he yelled at the sky.

"Grimmjow, what's wrong?" Ichigo asked.

"There's-he-I- FUCK FUCK FUUUCK!" he screamed again.

"What is it!"

Grimmjow calmed himself before speaking again. He had blown up on the other enough times for one day and he truly didn't deserve it. After all, none of this was Kurosaki's fault.

"I can't find my damned keys!" he pouted.

"Well let's try looking in and around the car." Ichigo suggested.

"Yeah." He answered, snatching the ticket from his windshield.

The two searched under the car, inside the car, and even over the fence behind the car, but couldn't find the keys. The two were currently sitting inside the car because the sky had decided to open up on them.

"Grimmjow, I'm sorry we couldn't find them."

"I just-oh wait!" he yelled, "I remember where they are now!"

He leaned over the seat and grabbed his book sack from the back before he started rummaging through it. After a few notebooks were tossed carelessly behind him, Grimmjow smiled widely as he withdrew the keys from the bag.

"Wow. I don't believe this. You mean to tell me we did all that looking for nothing?"

"Sorry 'bout that Kurosaki. Guess I just forgot I put 'em in my book sack earlier today." He smirked, sticking a key in the ignition.

"Way to waste a good ten minutes of my life." Ichigo retorted, pulling the seat belt over his frame.

"I thought you liked spending time with little ol me." His joke was met with a scowl, "And why are you wearing a seat belt? You don't trust my driving?" he asked after starting the car.

He seemed truly shocked that he had put on his seatbelt.

"Like hell I would! It's already raining and let's be frank, you switch lanes every five seconds!"

"Suit yourself." Grimmjow replied, speeding out of the parking lot.

After about two almost wrecks, Ichigo released his grip on his seat belt and looked out the sunroof. Maybe he'd be calmer if his eyes weren't on the road. The sky was quite dark tonight. It was raining heavily as well. The whole night was all a little too foreboding. When he considered all the facts he knew, it just seemed like they were in a bottomless pit. This Aizen guy seemed quite malevolent and heartless. No, not seemed, was definitely malevolent and heartless. How would they handle this? How could they handle it? It was safe to assume that if they ran, he would hunt them down; not to mention their families and friends he would most likely target as well.

He sighed inwardly thinking about how complicated this was going to be. If Aizen was a true drug lord, how would they reach him? He was bound to have more people like Grimmjow, if not stronger ones, protecting him. And you don't become a drug lord by being weak and helpless or doing things the legal way, so the guy must be pretty dangerous by himself. He chanced a glance at Grimmjow and noticed that he was unusually serious, even as he shifted gears and cut corners aggressively.

Somehow, he was comforted by his presence. It made him feel safe just like that night they had together before all this confusion. Maybe there was hope for them yet. With that in mind, he felt a little relief. By now they had entered the Grimmjow's neighborhood and turned down his street. He couldn't help but notice another car parked in the other's massive driveway when it came into view.

"Maybe that's his father's car." He thought as they pulled into the garage.

Grimmjow put the car in park, and turned the key. Ichigo got out and followed him to the door, and then through the kitchen to his room. After closing the door and locking it, Grimmjow scratched his head roughly.

"Grimmjow, I've been thinking… If our families and friends are at risk-" Ichigo tried.

"There's no "if" Kurosaki. They're already targets. The only way Aizen will stop targeting them is if I go back and work for him."

"Then-then we'll just have to stop him ourselves!"

"No! You stay out of this. If he-if he were to get his hands on you…"

"I can't abandon you Grimmjow. I won't abandon you, especially not if I'm being targeted too."

"And you won't be doing that. Just forget about it for now. I can handle working for the bastard. After all, I'm standing here in front of you ain't I?"

"We'll figure something out. I know we will."

They both took a seat on the bed, letting the sounds of the storm outside fill their ears. After some time, Grimmjow fell onto his back; his body seemingly merging with the mattress. Ichigo looked over to him from his seated position against the wall. This was something he wasn't used to. Usually, their positions were reversed, and they were in his room. By the expression on his face, he could tell the other was in deep thought, which also wasn't something he was used to.

He smiled and sprawled himself out next to him. When he got no response, he slid his hand down to Grimmjow's and threaded their fingers together. Blue eyes glanced over to him for a moment, before looking back at the ceiling again. Ichigo sighed heavily.

"I'm gonna protect you Kurosaki. You and everybody else in our lives."

The statement made said orange head blush. His heart was racing and his stomach was doing turns now. He was scared. Of course he was scared. That didn't seem to be the cause of his sudden rush of emotions and rising body temperature though. Even after all the arguing the two had done today, he still felt deeply connected to the man beside him. He knew he could trust those words. More importantly, he knew he was falling in more ways than one for Grimmjow.

"I-I'll protect you too Grimm, in every way I can."

"…"

"Every hero needs saving from time to time." He smiled.

Grimmjow took Ichigo's hand and brought it up to his chest. He looked him in the eyes when the two surfaces touched.

"Do you feel that Kurosaki? I'm scared as hell right now. My heart feels like it's gonna jump out of my chest." He smirked, "But I'm sure about protecting you."

"Maybe…maybe that's not the only reason it's beating so fast…"

*Knock Knock*

"Grimmjow, open this door." A male's voice called from the hallway.

Grimmjow released his hand and sat up abruptly. "Kurosaki, get in the closet." he whispered.

"Wh-what? Why?"

"Just do it!" he whispered more forcefully.

Ichigo sat up and got off the bed quickly. He looked back at Grimmjow before promptly walking to the closet. After entering it, he pulled the door while holding the knob in place to avoid any noise. When the door met the frame, he released the knob.

He heard the bedroom door open and someone enter, while Grimmjow moved to sit on the bed. After a few seconds of silence, he could hear the conversation begin.

"Do you know why I'm here, in this hell hole you call a room?" the man, he assumed to be Grimmjow's father, spoke.

"No, I don't." he heard Grimmjow's familiar raspy voice respond.

"I was mailed a few things from your school yesterday. They suggested I deal with the problem immediately."

"Well? Are you gonna tell me what this is about?"

Suddenly, Ichigo heard the rustling of paper.

"This! Your transcript. It's much less than I expect from my son. All you have to focus on is school, because you're too lazy to work, so your grades should be more than what I'm seeing. And when I think about it, you aren't working, so how on earth can you afford to be going out all the time, or that expensive phone bill, or the flashy car? Where are you getting the money from?"

There was no response. Only a mild silence before the man spoke again.

"I do not approve of the way you've been acting at school or living your life Grimmjow." There was a brief pause before he began again, "I stopped giving you money because I did not approve of the things you were doing with it. It seems as though you've made progress to living a cleaner life when it comes to drugs, however…"

Ichigo could tell what was going to be said next.

"It is a sin to be bisexual Grimmjow. If you continue to make such a choice, you will burn in the depths of hell for all of eternity."

Ichigo clenched the hem of his shirt tightly with both hands. He wanted to burst out of his confinement and defend his boyfriend, but he couldn't gather his courage. Grimmjow didn't deserve to be talked to like this. Of course, he may be a jerk and quite insensitive sometimes, but deep down, he had a heart. Was this what he always had to deal with whenever his father was home? If so, no wonder he got all touchy that night in his room.

"Do you hear yourself when you say shit like that? You sound like a pathetic child! Maybe it's your choice to live your life fear-based and insecure, but I fucking won't! And it's not a fucking choice! I don't tell my dick what to like and what not to! I hate it when people like you talk about things they don't know anything about! For instance, did you know your little storybook says that a sin is a sin, and none are greater than the others? When you lie on your tax forms, or when you lie to Neliel about showing up at her school assemblies, it's just as bad as my choice, and they're both just as bad as a fucking murderer killing his next victim! So don't try preaching to me because you don't know anything at all!"

That outburst was completely unexpected. Ichigo didn't know Grimmjow knew so much. He had clearly done his homework, in a manner of speaking. He smiled at the silence of the room. That was something he loved about Grimmjow. He wasn't an easy person to show up or tear down. If you were going to challenge him, you'd best be ready for an all out war. That thought relieved him because maybe he could bring Aizen down from his high horse the same way.

Suddenly, he could hear hurried footsteps, and then the slamming of the bedroom door.

He waited a moment before slowly opening the closet door. He saw Grimmjow sitting on the edge of the bed, looking angrier than ever.

"Grimm?" he called lightly, making his way closer to him.

"What?"

"Are you okay?"

"You know me well enough by now to know my response to that." He smiled.

"Right"

"Anyway, I guess I should be getting you home soon. It is Thursday."

"Wait, but we still need to talk about what we're going to do about Aiz-"

"We can talk about that tomorrow when we have some free time after school."

"O-okay. Let's get going then. I'm kind of tired." He replied.


When the car came to a stop in front of the Kurosaki clinic, Ichigo broke the silence.

"Hey Grimmjow, I just want to say…I-I think what you said to your dad tonight was really…well cool." He flustered when the boy looked at him and raised a blue eyebrow, "I-I mean, it was very knowledgeable and mature! It may not have been the smartest move, but it needed to be said."

"Thanks? I don't really know what you want me to say to that Kurosaki."

"Ugh! Never mind!"

He opened the door and stepped out irritably. He quickly walked to his front door and unlocked it.

"Kurosaki!" Grimmjow called before he could open it.

"What?" he turned.

"Don't I get a good night kiss?"

"…"

Grimmjow stepped out of his car and stuffed his hands into his pockets before making his way over to him. "You know you can't resist my charm." He smirked widely.

"Maybe not, but I can resist your breath." Ichigo laughed, waving his hand.

"My brea-" Grimmjow stopped his sentence short and blew his breath into the palm of his hand, "The hell are you talking about?"

"It was a joke Grimm." He replied, standing on his tiptoes and planting a chaste kiss on his lips, "Good night." He smiled after they parted.

"Heh, yeah. See ya tomorrow."

When Kurosaki closed the door behind him, Grimmjow smiled and walked back to his car. What he had with Kurosaki was worth more to than the world to him. He couldn't lose it to Aizen, but he wasn't about to be the man's errand boy for the rest of his life either. Starting up his car again, he frowned. He needed to think up a plan and soon because more than just their future together was at stake.

After the long drive back to his house, Grimmjow entered his room, closed his door, and collapsed on his bed again. He laid in silence for quite some time, lost in thought. After bringing his hand to his chest, he remembered what Kurosaki had said to him earlier, just now understanding what he was saying.

"Maybe…maybe that's not the only reason it's beating so fast…"

"Kurosaki says the weirdest things sometimes." He thought.

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