A/N: Chapter 8. The end to this amazing journey. Not the end, end. But the end as Neverland sees it. I've got an epilogue coming up, so this isn't the end of the journey for Quinn and Rachel in so many words. But – thanks for following with me. I hope you've enjoyed reading the story as much as I've enjoyed writing it. Happy, happy reading all.

-TSL

Chapter 8 –

I Have Found My Shadow:

Quinn can taste her in the air. She can feel the pressure of her petite form molding to her own like a shadow's caress, and as she basks in the essence of Rachel Berry she lets her vision assault her with all of things that she's missed.

It's like a silent film, burning into the backs of her eyes. A heady breath and she can see for the first time all of the things that she's lost. The flash of brown penny loafers astride her old motorbike – knee high's scuffing against the backs of her calves.

She breathes again – her hands gripping onto an old record player, wrapped up in blue paper – Rachel beaming at her as she tears at the small treasure gifted into her hands. There's a steady assault of image after image – and when Quinn settles, flipping through birthdays, and holidays and anniversaries like a flip camcorder – she pauses as she brings up a hand to run it along the small star tattoo at the back of her ear.

She had been in an accident. And while all the lines and parameters are blurred and hazy around the edges – she can feel the shift, and the fear – and the resolution that come with it. And with most things and with most elements of shock – not every line is filled in and complete, but Quinn can see the outline, and she can see the gradations of color vibrantly as the images behind her retinas burn.

"I was in an accident."

It isn't a question, because Quinn remembers. She can see the bright lights of New York City as her car winds down familiarly populated streets. She can feel the thickness of the steering wheel underneath her hand, and when she opens her eyes and blinks against the onslaught – she sees the bright lights of approaching headlights, and their proximity to her alternately traveling lane. And when she grips her phone within her right hand – the thought of her wife trailing softly from her parted lips. Her eyes widen in a sorrowful calm – as those headlights approach violently. And all she remembers…is black.

And when she blinks again she smiles warmly into the hand still cupping her face. She nuzzles it briefly before bringing her clarified eyes on Rachel's. And she wipes the tears that are streaked across her face away with the pad of her thumbs. And she sighs – her heart finally light, after months and months of darkness.

"Do you know that you were the first thing that flew through my mind, when I thought that it was all over?"

Rachel shakes her head almost imperceptibly as her breathing shallows against Quinn's exploring fingers. The blonde takes her time as she maps out all of the marks and undulations and patterns of her wife's face that she hasn't traversed in much too long.

"I could never forget you Rachel…not for long anyway. You're my Wendy, you have my heart, and you've sealed it in Neverland."

And when Rachel smiles brightly and warmly, Quinn smiles back just as brightly – the memories are still hazily swirling behind her skull – and it kind of hurts to know that she's been in the dark for so long. And her heart hurts more than anyone could possibly fathom, but with Rachel herestill here. She can't help her soul from soaring between them, and when she brushes the tears away from brunette lashes, she leans up – and in an embrace very much needed and eternally missed. She meets Rachel's lips with every ounce of grace that she's ever been granted.

And she can breathe…she is breathing.


T.K. although initially forgotten finds his way between their feet, and when they part, Quinn's eyes widen when she scoops up the gray tabby into her arms – confused at his presence and angry with herself that she even eclipsed the thought of brining him with her. And when she looks up at Rachel quizzically, the brunette smiles before sitting down on the couch next to Quinn her; hand reaching out to stroke the familiarly soft fur of his head as he purrs contentedly.

"How did you get here bud?"

Quinn whispers into his fur, and Rachel gives her a serious look before tucking her feet beneath her on the cushion.

"I brought him with me."

And Quinn can see the trepidation cross Rachel's face. And now that Quinn is really looking, she can see how exhausted Rachel Berry looks. Her hair is wild and in need of a brush, and her clothes don't match – Quinn can feel the absence her presence in Rachel's life has made – and she swallows the sorrow clutching at her chest, burying her lips into T.K.s waiting fur.

"I-I don't know…where to start Quinn…now that we're here. I – I was so lost without you."

And the tears are prickling the backs of her eyes as she looks up to stare at Rachel. The brunette is clutching at the ring on her neck – and in the few minutes that they've been re-united she already sees it as a coping mechanism – a tic that her absence has brought on.

"Um…I, shall I start from the beginning?"

Quinn's voice is thick and strained when she blinks her eyes, and nods her head after a short pause.

"Please…"


"You mean…you planned this for a year?"

Rachel's eyes are firm as she steadies Quinn's face, and the blonde knows that she is scared. She's scared that after all of this waiting and all of this hard work, that Quinn still won't come back to her. And Quinn takes her hand and leads it away from the chain around Rachel's neck. She laces their fingers together and brings their joined hands to her lips – kissing every knuckle.

"And Andie, George, Lily, your dads…they all knew?"

Rachel smiles and nods.

"Your professors too…the landlord of your building, Dr. Redding, our financiers…"

"Dr. Redding? You mean…Mrs. Redding, my advisor at Columbia? I was supposed to have Mr. Friedlander, but they told me he retired and I got placed with…"

And when Quinn sees Rachel's shaking head she stops. Recounting the entire life she thought she had up until this point as an amnesiac.

"She wasn't an advisor was she?"

"No…she's our therapist and your life coach."

Quinn hums. Understanding swirling within her deep eyes. She doesn't understand whether or not she should be angry with the lie that she'd been forced to live for almost an entire year of her life. Angry with a lie that everyone was in on but her. It hurts…because Quinn is prideful – she always has been and she always will be – but when she sees the ring sitting on her finger, she buries the sentiment down to a place where it belongs. Because all of this, this entire falsity that she's been living, it brought her right back to where she needed to be all along.

"I'm still in shock, and my head hurts from all of this new information…"

Rachel strokes an errant strand of hair out of her hazel eyes as Quinn pinches the bridge of her nose.

"God, I feel like I've been incepted."

And for the first time in a long time, she really laughs. And Rachel joins in, and soon the room is filled with their raucous and soft laughter. She reaches for Rachel, and embraces her strongly as their laughs and giggles finally taper off, and with her chin nestled against the brunettes shoulder, she breathes in her scent. Smiling into the familiar skin. Letting Rachel stroke her back warmly and comfortably as they sit there encircled together with no space between them.

And when Rachel whispers softly into her ear, she feels a shiver tickle warmly against her back. And she closes her eyes to the missed sensation.

"Peter you won't forget me…will you?"

Quinn runs the memory through her tired brain, and she remembers the letters on the worn pages like a second skin. She raises her lips to a waiting ear and whispers in return exactly what she expects Rachel is waiting to hear.

"Me? forget? Never…"

Rachel sighs shakily into her ear when the words escape her lips. And Quinn knows why – because she did forget. She did forget their love. But she rubs a soothing hand across Rachel's back. Because – in the grand scheme of all that they embody. Rachel is still there…and now, she remembers them – and she could never forget again.

"Will you ever come back?"

Quinn nods her head and smiles warmly. She knows how this part of the quote ends, and she knows that for this moment it isn't quite what she's going for. And so with a very tender conviction and a loving embrace she whispers against the tender skin she so wishes she could jut get lost in.

"Always Rachel…always."


It takes another hour of cries and sobs, and smiles of jubilation at the old Berry home and when Leroy looks at her and cups her cheeks before tenderly kissing her forehead, she leans into his touch – feeling the love and the tenderness he so eloquently possesses. Hiram is much less composed, and he crushes her warmly with his smaller form – his glasses foggy and wet from his tears. And Quinn hugs him back fiercely, thanking them both as she stands in their foyer…for never giving up on her.

They leave—barely escaping the clutching throes of happiness and welcome, and as Quinn sits in the passenger seat of Rachel's rental car she stares out of the window at a Lima that looks vastly different than the one she rode in on. The leaves on the trees are more vibrant, the asphalt more concrete, the sky a brighter blue – and the weightlessness in her heart is almost foreign as she feels familiar – that word…familiar – fingers intertwining with her own at her hip. And when she turns her gaze to the driver's seat, there is a gorgeous Rachel Berry waiting for her.

They stop at Hook's Thrift and Tackle and when Quinn walks in she can feel the Neverland that never seemed to ease out of this place. Captain is behind the counter, and when he sees their joined hands as they approach him – he grinds on the edge of his cigar with a faint twinkle in his warmer eyes.

"I see you got your woman Mrs. Berry-Fabray…"

Rachel turns to answer, as does Quinn. And at the simple fact that Quinn remembers that –yes- she is Berry-Fabray now, Rachel offers her a beaming smile, and a squeeze of fingers before she leans over the counter and grabs for Captain's cigar, setting it down on the counter-top teasingly and disapprovingly. And when she looks back up she nods at Captain, and he nods back, a small smile tugging on his wiry lips.

"Thank you, James."

"I'm just in it for the adventure Miss."

And Quinn watches her wife smile warmly at the gruff man before pulling them both out of the store – their store. And as they re-climb into the rented Malibu – Quinn has one last wish before they head off into whatever direction Rachel has in store for them.

"Is Merriman Park close-by?"

And Rachel doesn't nod or give an answer, she simply turns the steering wheel as if it were a second nature, and as they pull up to the familiar park in the late afternoon to sit on familiar mermaids tails. Quinn smiles as she strokes the metal scales, and she looks over peacefully at the children playing at the swings – and as her present is finally mapping out for her before her eyes – she finds herself dreaming of an even more abundant future.

Rachel smiles at her warmly – and Quinn's eyes leave the distant realms from which they've been caught. And when she settles her bright hazel gaze on deep amber – she watches her wife's hair get lost in a light breeze, swirling around her face in a sweet dance. And for that almost second – she looks seventeen again. And Quinn smiles – because it's been nearly ten years – she knows now that she isn't twenty-two. She understands that that life has gone and lived itself. She remembers that she has an established firm, and a thriving career – and most of all, she remembers the side-longs and in-betweens of a three-year-old marriage that has so much more to give.

"You're it for me, you know that?"

Rachel steps up off of her Mermaid, her feet digging patterns in the sand before she follows those eyes and walks over to sit on the tail end of Quinn's mermaid, wrapping her arms around the blonde's waist, and clasping her fingers together around her middle.

"Well, I didn't do all of this waiting for nothing Quinn. I am a fairly persistent individual with a career, and bills to pay, and a life to live. I am also rather selfish at times, and so it is with great conviction that I tell you…that had you not felt for me nearly as much as I feel for you – than everything, all of that lost time – wouldn't nearly have been quite so painstakingly heart-breaking now would it?"

"Well, when you put it like that…"

"Quinn…you are my everything. And I would sail to the ends of the earth and back for you whenever the need should arise. Because…you are and always will be it for me."

And Quinn bites her lip from a smile when she feels a warm and heavy head, land softly against her shoulder blades – and before she can properly bask in the feeling - her mermaid totters dangerously from the displaced weight, and they are falling into the sand. Lips sandy and dirt smeared, hands roaming to catch balances. Fingers following to grab at hips – and while they laugh in the sand as they clutch to one another, the sun beaming down to illuminate their still forms. Rachel trails a hand up Quinn's back and holds her close as she seals the small distance between them with a tender kiss.


Two days later the trip back to New York City is daunting and familiar and unfamiliar all at the same time. Quinn has spent every waking moment re-discovering herself and Rachel throughout their stay in Lima. They haven't yet traversed all boundaries of their relationship as a married couple quite yet – because things are still tentative and old, but new. And it would be best to get Quinn tested out before hopes and dreams are placed too high.

On the first day back – Quinn visits with Dr. Redding. And in a moment of differentially they meet in Dr. Redding's normal office instead of her –now Quinn realizes must have been fake – offices on the Columbia campus. She notes the potted plants in the windowsills and the gray-toned furniture and grimaces slightly as she seats herself in the unfamiliar leather.

Dr. Redding is warm and astute, and Quinn can already see why Rachel feels comfortable in her care. She can understand why she always enjoyed their advising appointments at Columbia. She feels at a loss – unsure on where she stands – because believing someone to be one thing, and then seeing them for who they really are is a challenge in and of itself – and the adaptation that Quinn feels is necessary, eludes her.

"Quinn, I'm glad to see you. As you see – we have a change of scenery today."

"I do…Ms…Dr. Redding. You have a nice office."

"Quinn – let me start there. I know this is difficult because you knew me as a completely different person in your life. You must feel me to be a rare form of liar. And in part, I am. And I am sorry. But please don't let our presently new relationship falter because we are uncomfortable. Please call me Ms. Redding. It is how you know me. And it is what makes you comfortable."

Quinn smiles – this therapist is good. Her heart swells at the thought that Rachel trusted her with Quinn's care. Her wife is amazing.

"Well then Ms. Redding, since it seems like we're on softer ground now. Where do you want to start with your assessment?"

Dr. Redding smiles warmly before dropping her pen on her desk and staring at a small plant on her desk as Quinn relaxes into the much more welcoming leather.

"This isn't an assessment, don't think of this as anything other than a session Quinn."

Quinn nods languidly into the couch as she stares out of the large window of the office.

"Tell me about your wife."

And Quinn smiles, her eyes closing to all of the things that come to mind about the perfection that is Rachel Berry. And she chuckles lightly – because surely – now, they will be here for hours.


By the end of the next two weeks Quinn is moving back into their old apartment. The "new" one feels oddly unfamiliar to her now – and as she moves her things back to the spaces where they once resided she smiles – at all of the memories of this space that they've made together. Happy to have them back again.

And in the midst of all of the unpacking, she stops into the bathroom in the throes of finding her wife, and she stumbles on Rachel at the sink staring fondly at Quinn's unpacked toothbrush resting in their toothbrush holder beside Rachel's at the edge of the counter.

"Watcha doing babe?"

And as Rachel turns in surprise which quickly ebbs into a sideways smile – she shakes her head before wrapping her arms around Quinn's waist, and the blonde watches her as she takes a large inhale of breath at Quinn's collarbone, and when she opens her mouth and smiles – a small admonition escapes into the air between them.

"It's so nice…to see your things, exactly where they've always belonged. It's stupid, because it's a toothbrush…but…I missed that. I missed your socks hanging under the hamper instead of inside of it, and your shampoo in the shower caddy. I missed rolling my feet under your legs to warm them up at night when it gets cold. I missed a lot of things about you that I never realized I was capable of missing. And I'm just so beyond words – to have the possibility of it all back."

And as Quinn wipes her hand over her sweaty and dusty brow from all of the unpacking she leans down to capture her wife in a kiss to say all of the things that her mouth cannot. And when Rachel leans over in the midst of the heat to turn on the shower – Quinn doesn't object – and when they climb under the hot spray, the smell of familiar shampoo and body wash shared between them – Quinn doesn't stop her hands from roaming to places she once road mapped vigorously – and Rachel lets the blonde's GPS take over. Her own fingers doing much of the same. And as they get lost in each other between the cascading hums of water – Quinn feels like she's finally made it home.


The next month is lively and lovely and perfect in so many ways. Quinn stopped her classes at Columbia the week after returning – much to her professors oblige, and when Rachel and Dr. Redding convince her to re-take the Bar at the end of the month Quinn agrees. And as she studies over all of her texts stored in bookshelves and closet storage bins – she smiles as the haziness of Law that had remained fuzzy begin to finally fill in. And by the end of the weekend she is herself. And she takes the Bar – she is not the oldest one there by far. But when she finishes the exam she salutes the small victory with nod to the test administrator.

And when she gets her results back – she's passed – just as she'd known she would once she signed her name on the first page. By the end of the next two months she's back at her practice. And she isn't handling cases quite yet, but she's advising and she's re-settling into the swing of things. And Rachel is so proud of her.

By the third month – Quinn is content. She finds herself walking the familiar streets of Manhattan to a rhythm she's known before, and before she knows it she finds herself traversing a much travelled pass. Her feet drag her to the front of a glass store, and her eyes settle on the name inscribed against the glass. She smiles, and looks up into the New York City night sky. Marveling at just how different it looks from New York City Mornings. The city lights cascade wonderfully around and between one another, melting into a painter's scene. And people walk between and around her with a different purpose than they do when the morning affords it.

And as she opens the door to a familiar jingle of a bell, and the all too nostalgic smell of dusted ink on paper, she finds her way to the back of the stacks, and when her fingers settle on the only copy in rotation of Peter and Wendy by J.M. Barrie, her eyes rake over the pages as they flip between her steady fingers. And as she reaches the inside flap of the back cover – her hazel eyes pause on a small inscription in blue ink left in the margin. It is new, and indented with ink, and Quinn squints her eyes to read it carefully.

"…It looks like it's happily ever after Mrs. Darling. I hope you enjoyed your travels, and I hope that Neverland turned out to be everything you expected and more. For I think…that perhaps it's time that I take your hand in return, and let you lead me on a journey of your own fashioning.

I'll be waiting…always.

-R"

And when Quinn closes the back cover of the book and places it slowly back to it's perch among the stacks – she sees Andie in the shadows smiling at her warmly before averting her gaze. And Quinn smiles as she retrieves her cell phone from her purse. And as she taps out a message to her wife – she knows that life will never get better than this because…they've had Neverland with them all along. And the magic…

It is everywhere.

And from across the city, rousing herself from a mid-evening nap Rachel awakens to the buzzing of her phone nearby, and when she unlocks the screen to read the text her heart stops in its chest and she falls in love with a girl she met in Lima, Ohio and followed and lost on the way to Neverland- all over again.

"The rabbit hole is waiting for you Alice…are you ready? Let me take you to a place where lovers soar and adventure lurks behind every valley.

Wonderland awaits, Rachel.

The magic…is everywhere my love."

And as Rachel turns to look out of the large window of their bedroom, at a New York City skyline illuminated in an effervescent glow, she smiles at the pattering of her heart. And she feels – as her fingers skim the space that is still warm from Quinn's radiant body – that perhaps…. she is already there.