I followed Jackson's advice and stretched out to sleep. My quarters were simple and austere but I didn't mind. My apartment attached to my office had been pretty bare Max had always been after me to add some kind of decorations to it. I laid down and tried to shut out the world. The pervasive sense of wrongness persisted, like an itch between my shoulder blades I couldn't quite reach. Eventually my physical exhaustion from Carter and Lam's tests overwhelmed the itch and I drifted away.

I woke up sore and confused. Both strange states to be in, I took a few moments to recall why I was waking up in such an unfamiliar place but being sore, well that was new and not novel.

I sat up slowly and rubbed my head. My shoulders, ribs, and back ached fiercely, felt like I'd been beaten by a stick which had actually happened to me once in my youth. I had committed some transgression and my Aunt had beaten me for it. Not a good memory.

The home life of Nephilim I imagined had not been terribly different from that of humans. More violent I would guess, Nephilim are incredibly difficult to kill through mundane means – I had lied to the SGC it could be done but they didn't need to know that. So instead of a slap on the hand or a paddling a thorough beating with an eight inch tree branch was more likely.

My mother had died or vanished shortly after my birth. I was a toddler when I was first on my own. I wandered from tent to tent, a sort of stray dog in the encampment. My father wanted nothing to do with me, unlike most of the Angelic Fathers he was not fascinated or proud of me, at best he was indifferent although I had received just as many kicks and blows from him as other adults in Oro who had neither the patience nor compassion to spare for a lone child.

I stole or begged each scrap of clothing and every mouthful of food. My abilities and knowledge were stolen as well, I would intimidate a cousin into teaching me everything he or she knew either through force, trickery, or bribery. All Nephilim are cousins but even that tacit familial relationship earned me nothing but scorn. Every other Nephilim lived in security and grandeur. Kushiel viewed me as a failing or a weakness. I often wondered why he didn't simply destroy me outright, perhaps it was too much work or would take him away from his duties.

So I survived into manhood, although there was none to conduct the ceremony over me or find a woman for me I was physically a man separated from my cousins further by my in between status. Then the Angels came, armed with blades and crushing weapons, not gifts of great beauty and astonishing foods.

The slaughter was absolute. The first to fall were those who ran to greet their fathers and husbands. They were driven to the earth and annihilated so thoroughly that the sand turned from glittering gold to muddy red for miles around. The next to die were those too astonished and horrified to flee. Some managed to find weapons and stand against the tide of winged death. Their deaths were especially painful and gruesome. Finally all that was left were those like me who had witnessed the initial slaughter and ran, darting through Oro as it began to burn, hurtling over petrified human women and their demi-angelic children who were too frightened to move. I tried to get one woman to her feet but she lashed out at me and spit like a serpent so I left her and fled on alone.

I closed my ears to the savage screams and heart broken cries filling the air, the inhuman wails of Nephilim with their throats cut. I paused to be sick and then ran on. Oro was enormous far vaster than any standing human city even in this day and age. But I reached the far edge eventually and there was Kushiel, waiting for me. How he knew my path or even knew to recognize me among the other fleeing Nephilim I did not know, but he called me by name.

"Simon my son, it is time to pass on the Creator demands it."

"I have done nothing wrong! I was born that is all!" I screamed and tried to turn and run.

"That is the only sin you need have committed." Kushiel said and drove his spear into me. The blow was so powerful it dropped me to my face in the bloody sand. It was the most painful thing I had ever experienced.

I don't know what happened immediately after that, the next thing I was aware of was waking up naked and bleeding on a lakeside on Earth somewhere on the African continent. I spent the next hundred or so millennia wandering until humanity showed up for the record humans have been around a hell of a lot longer than they think. Still it was lonely and even when humanity showed up I couldn't blend in with them, too long on my own and I looked too different. I was blond and giant and muscular, they were little shriveled people with dark hair and eyes who would have worshipped me. So I hung around and learned about them.

Eventually I managed to join their groups but I didn't stay long, for one not aging and healing instantly got noticed with a quickness, people these days are not as observant. So I wandered again but at least there were other people to speak with. The angels largely left me alone I would feel them occasionally but I doubt they noticed me at all.

So time passed empires rose and fell people loved and murdered and eventually I found Max and started an agency. Then things went South again. Oh well what else could I expect?

I stood up and stretched noting the pop and groan of tendons and muscles. I looked around for a clock to check the time and came up empty. Apparently it wasn't standard issue for the guest quarters. I dressed in a borrowed set of utility coveralls with no insignia or rank and headed out.

I was heading toward the surface when a familiar voice shouted out to me. I looked behind me and spotted Carter charging after me. She looked disheveled and exhausted.

"Have you slept at all?" I asked as she drew level with me.

"No, look would you mind a few more tests?"

"Why?" I asked with a frown.

"We've discovered some inconsistencies."

"Like what?"

"You're bleeding energy, a sort of radiation, very rare we've only seen it in experimental situations in laboratories, never in nature."

"Is it dangerous?"

"No, but it is powerful."

"What are you trying to say Carter?" I said impatiently.

"I am concerned that this power is from your core, Dr. Lam and I agree that you might be . . . bleeding out."

"Is it killing me?"

"We don't know."

"Can you stop it?"

"We have some ideas."

"Okay." I was beginning to feel numb and panicky. Real death had never been a concern of mine. After surviving my father's attempt to murder me real death had never seemed likely, I had always been able to fight back or avoid it. I shook my head and followed Carter closely. She led me back to her lab and began a series of tests immediately. Doctor Lam took my vitals and asked me how I felt.

"Sore, bruised, tired."

"Is that usual for you?"

"No on the contrary it is extremely odd."

"Do you think exposure to sunlight would help you?"

"Maybe I don't know this hasn't happened before. How did you figure out I was bleeding this energy?"

"The lighting system went off line we traced the problem to interference from an unknown power source, you."

"Okay, so fix me docs." I said with false cheer, they didn't need to know I was afraid.

So they began, endless scans and readouts. The general and Jackson arrived at some point silently observing and deciding. I felt a burst of annoyance and anger at their passive stares I was scared and panicked and wanted nothing more than to run the clock back ten years. Finally after what felt like decades the women stopped their tests.

"Whats the verdict ladies?"

"We've managed to slow the bleed but I don't know if we can stop it entirely." Sam said wearily. I looked over at Lam she seemed even less pleased with her results.

"Carolyn, what is it?"

"You're getting weaker. The more energy you lose the more physical strength you loose, if we don't stop it soon –"

"I'll begin to die." I said numbly. She nodded sadly.

"What do you recommend?"

"This radiation is extremely rare it's only been detected in nebula and gas clouds in deep space. Where did you come from Simon?"

"A place called Oro I don't know where it is I don't know if it even exists anymore."

"Its possible Oro is where you received this energy. If we could get you to a place saturated with this radiation then the bleed might heal naturally."

"How? I know you have gate technology but unless you happen to have a gate address that opens up in a nebula we're screwed."

"We have friends, powerful friends with technology so far beyond even the Goa'uld that it looks like magic. We are not beaten yet Simon we'll figure this out." Sam said sternly. I smiled tiredly.

"I'd like to see Max, does she know about any of this?"

"No I don't think so."

"Tell me Doc, how'd this happen? I mean why now what's causing the bleed?"

"When you healed all those wounded people you tore a wound in yourself, that wound hasn't healed right, you're still bleeding." Lam said.

"Great, teach me to do a good thing. Okay I'm off ladies let me know when you find out anything." I said cheerfully and left. I had no idea where Max was but I had a hunch she would be topside in one of the parks on the installation. I thought about the little lake they'd found for me.

I headed up waving away a group of security forces offering a ride. If I was going to die I'd like to do it above ground in the fresh air and not in a crowded truck or in the dank warren of the SGC. I walked slowly savoring the cool Colorado air and the whisper of wind through the various trees and plants around me.

I found Max fishing at the little lake. She seemed content. Her tackle box was nearly empty and a six pack of beer was at her side. I sat next to her and dangled my feet in the water.

"You'll scare the fish." She said. I smiled.

"Did you really want to catch any?" I asked nodding toward her unbaited line.

"No."

I fell silent content to sit.

"I had an interesting chat with Danny a few hours ago."

"Oh yeah what'd he have to say?"

"Something about you leaking radiation."

"Oh that, its nothing to worry about."

"Sure, you're only dying."

"Not yet I'm not, come on you said these people are the best at their jobs, so no I'm not dying, well, yet."

"Simon this isn't a joke-"

"Max I'm older than civilization, older than humanity, probably older than immortals if anyone has to die –"

"No, Simon you are not going to die." She said sternly and glared at me over her pole.

"All I'm saying Max is that everything dies, everything Max even you and Macleod and all the other immortals, even Sharkey and Ben and all the other freaky creatures in our lives, the sun and this solar system, the galaxy itself, one day even the universe, everything dies. Maybe its just my turn."

"Aren't you afraid?"

"Of course I'm afraid, I'm terrified. Humanity has their gods and the promise of God's heaven or hell to comfort them, what have I got? Where will I go when I die? So yeah I'm scared Max, but it will happen one day. I don't want to be the one living thing that looks on as the universe collapses and the big bang happens again, I don't want to live that long okay?"

"So that's it you're giving up?"

"No, not yet but if Carter and Lam can't figure out a solution then I'm willing to –" I collapsed then as a lance of fire pierced my gut and I dropped to my knees.

"Simon!" Max shouted. She dropped her pole, I watched it slip into the lake, she snatched me up by the shoulders and looked me in the eyes, or tried to, I had them screwed shut against the agony. Finally the pain faded and I opened my eyes.

"Simon?" She asked quietly.

"I'm fine help me up." I said weakly. She didn't argue and got me to my feet.

"Simon you look like hammered death, we should go back in."

"No, Max I don't want to die in a lab."

"We don't know that you're going to die yet, come on, you said you weren't giving up." She ordered and dragged me toward the SGC. Partway there the group of Security Forces in the truck showed up again and dragged me aboard. Max hopped on too and we headed in. Lam met us with a med team and a gurney.

"Get off me." I growled as the med techs dragged me onto the gurney. They ignored me which pissed me off, for no apparent reason, so I lashed out and knocked one to the ground. I got to my feet and staggered away from the group.

"Leave me alone!" I growled and wobbled threateningly. Sweat stood out in prominent beads on my paper white skin.

"Jus . . . lea . . . me . . ." I muttered and dropped to my knees. Two people rushed forward to pick me up. I waved my arms at them and swore in the language or Oro a language I wasn't sure I still knew, then the black had me.

The incessant beeping of monitors and hiss of a ventilator woke me up. I couldn't speak because of the tube down my throat so I tried to pull it out which earned me some attention. Max leaned over me and said something I couldn't understand. I scowled and pulled harder on the tube. She gripped my hand and spoke to someone beyond my vision and the tube was gently removed. I coughed and hacked for a few minutes and then caught my breath.

Max leaned over me and spoke again but her words were sheer gibberish I shook my head and tried to answer her, warm water was forced down my throat I drank greedily and then coughed again clearing my wind pipe. I tried again and managed to croak out a few words.

"What's going on?" I demanded. Max looked at me like I'd just threatened to kill her, complete confusion and fear. I frowned and she spoke again, again I couldn't understand her. I began to feel afraid, I had spoken English since its creation how could I not know what she was saying now?

Someone pressed a paper and pencil into my hand.

"What is going on?" I wrote frantically. It looked like English to me. Max took it and read an expression of relief filled her face.

"You are speaking a language we don't recognize, Daniel is stumped as well." She wrote. I sighed.

"It must be the language of Oro I thought I had forgotten it, why don't I understand spoken English?"

"We don't know." She wrote and set the pad aside after I read her response.

I sighed, this was a disaster. Why was I losing my English but rediscovering my Orish? I hated Oro all I knew there was pain, abuse and death. Why would I regress to that state?

I picked up the pad and scribbled a question.

"Am I still losing energy?"

Max smiled and shook her head.

"So I'm cured but can't communicate?" I wrote. She nodded and laughed tearfully. I sighed and shook her hand off my shoulder, I had no patience for her feelings. I sat up and clawed the monitors and plugs and ivs off of my chest. Lam tried to stop me but I skewered her with a look. I got to my feet and caught a look at myself in a full length mirror at the end of the room.

I was fascinated. I seemed younger, I hadn't actually changed much, my hair seemed darker, my eyes kinder, my skin more golden than alabaster, but the overall effect was one of youth. Even the scar on my chest looked more raw and shiny than it had, as though it had been recently inflicted. I ran a hand over the skin of the scar and was surprised at how tender it was. I reached inside and found my power, hot, vibrant and ready, I had not had such power or such ease of access to it in millennia.

I grinned and turned a predatory look toward the SGC personnel. I spoke aloud in the dead language of Oro.

"I am Nephilim restored! I am my father's son and none can stand against me, the Ori will fall before me!" I brought forth my wings and rejoiced in them. They were truly a blood red, where before they had been a dark metallic red these seemed freshly blooded I arched them over my head and flapped them experimentally before folding them close and sweeping out of the room.

I headed for the gate room, a few intrepid soldiers tried to stop me, I flung them aside with a gesture and a thought. Some faded diminished part of me railed against their abuse, the human in me, the weakness in me. The Ori would need the angel in me if I were to survive. I had nearly killed myself for humans too weak and useless to defend themselves, not again.

I strode into the gate room and regarded the iris. I turned to the observation room and shouted an order.

"Open the Iris or I will destroy you! Open the Iris and dial the Ori!" I could see Jack in the observation room. He spoke to me over the intercom but I have no idea what he was saying.

I shrieked an inhuman cry more akin to a bird of prey than a human and hurled a bolt of energy at the observation room. A screen descended but not soon enough to absorb the blast. The iris opened and the gate began to dial. I laughed triumphantly and waited for the wormhole to stabilize. As soon as the mirror surface steadied I spread my wings and threw myself through.

What awaited on the other side was a surprise. It was a planet with a surface of shimmering water, far ahead was a mighty city of curling spires and rippling towers. I beat my bloodied wings and darted through the moist air swooping and screaming my war cry. I wanted them to be ready. I dove down and watched humanoids in dark robes scatter before me. Armored men appeared and began to attack me. I dropped among them like a stone and slaughtered, utilizing a stolen weapon I decimated their ranks watching as the survivors fled in shock and regrouped beyond reach of my weapon. I laughed at their fear.

"I am Nephilim! Bring your leaders to me for I would parley with the mighty Ori!" I had no way of knowing if they understood me but a stream of figures whether priests or soldiers it was hard to say charged toward us from the most impressive citadel.

I laughed and headed higher. These tiny mortal creatures sought battle with me. I bared my teeth into the alien wind and let my power build I launched gouts of it at the cowering soldiery below me and the unknown forces approaching. The effect was amazingly destructive and satisfying. The material comprising the buildings was not sturdy enough to withstand my assault it crumbled like soft cheese and rained upon the remnants of the Ori forces. I giggled and banked down toward the main citadel.

Once near the entrance I dropped to the ground and killed the few remaining guards. Satisfied they were dead I discarded the stolen weapon and entered the enemy citadel. It was a grand and impressive structure I imagined my father would have been awed by it, Kushiel was such a simple creature.

I wandered through ornate but simple halls until I found a main chamber. At one end was a wall of living flame, in front of it stood a humanoid with skin like a mummy, his papery flesh was engraved with symbols his dead fiery eyes regarded me calmly.

"You do not cower before your conqueror human?" I demanded arching my wings and flinging enough power at him to level a building. He shrugged the blow away and regarded me calmly.

"Impressive." I conceded.

"Why do you come here to our city and take the lives or our people?"

"You have invaded my home, destroyed my people and threatened our allies. I am here to finish what you have begun." I said grandly.

"You are a psychotic murderer."

"Yes, but my cause is just." I pointed out. The humanoid inclined its head.

"I am the Orici I speak for the Ori."

"Leave our galaxy, and never trouble us again, allow your own people to choose what they worship and do not trouble the Ancients and I will leave, I will not tear your society and city down around your ears though it would give me great pleasure to do so."

"What you ask is impossible, our people choose to follow the Ori it is the Ancients who trouble us and would destroy us."

"I see." I said and mustered a massive amount of power, more than I had ever controlled at once and threw it past the Orici and into the wall of fire. The wall rippled and froze for a split second, then it began to darken and crack. There was a psionic scream, it crawled over my skin and into my pores. The Orici screamed and threw his hands into the air flame burst from his eyes and mouth and he crumpled like a puppet with the strings cut.

"I AM NEPHILIM! I AM NOT TO BE DISOBEYED!" I roared and began hurling more and more power at the wall and the structure. Finally as huge pieces of the ceiling began to fall I fled I launched into the air and began raining fire and explosions down into the strange city. As the citadel collapsed cracks seemed to form from its base across the surface of the planet. They extended from horizon to horizon and seemed bottomless, the surface of the planet flowed into the cracks and then the dirt on the edges followed after, the planet seemed to be swallowing itself. I wallowed in the destruction until I saw the cracks approaching the Stargate.

I darted toward it and slammed the chevrons for earth. The dialing sequence seemed to take an eternity, finally as the cracks hurtled toward it the wormhole stabilized and I launched into it. I returned to the SGC in a hail of rubble and smoke I crashed to the ground and slid into the wall below the observation room. I lay unmoving, shielded from the debris by my bloody wings.

Finally as the noise ceased and only the incoming klaxon remained blaring away I got to my feet and shook my wings, dust and debris rained down upon me. I folded the wings and regarded the SGC. Two platoons of Marines were facing me, weapons ready. I raised my hands and smirked. I started to speak when unspeakable pain seared through me, I screamed and raised my arms as though to ward off an attacker. Then it was black, again.

This time when I woke I was chained and alone. It looked like an isolation ward of some kind. I glared around and tried to focus my eyes although my head hurt fiercely. I sat up slowly, as far the chains would allow.

"Hello?" I called the room was dark, the only light came from the screens of monitors checking my health and a dim reading radiating from an observation room to my left.

"Simon?"

"Who else? Who is that?" I called.

"It's me Simon, its Max."

"What's going on Max?" I demanded groggily my trip to the Ori was a blur.

"You tell us, twelve hours ago you went berserk and forced your way into the gate room, you demanded we send you to the Ori, you came back seven hours ago. What happened? We're receiving reports from occupied worlds and the Ori home galaxy that the Priors and Ori soldiers are disappearing, that the Ori have lost all power, what did you do?"

"I'm not sure, wait how did you know I wanted to go to the Ori?"

"Daniel managed to figure out rough translations of what you were saying, Jack just guessed where you wanted to go initially."

"No he didn't he saw a berserk Nephilim and figured the Ori could either deal with me or suffer my wrath, smart guy Jack." I sighed. Max didn't argue, I never understood why she continually attempted to shield my feelings, I don't really have feelings not like she did.

"I really don't remember." I muttered.

"Not good enough Simon, consider things from our point of view, you've done something, something violent and powerful, something that could be a threat, and who were you when you did them? I didn't know that man, I didn't know his language or who he was!"

"You want to know who that was? That was me, a hundred thousand years ago in Oro, that is what I was and y'know what? I wasn't even one of the bad ones. I was scum, unwanted and underfoot, I got more beatings and broken bones than anything else in my life there. My father abandoned me and my mother was dead so I survived as an orphan in a sea of demi-angels and their mothers, I was the scapegoat for an entire community of creatures with more power at their fingertips than anything on the face of this earth. That was me, damaged, distrustful, angry as hell. Aren't you glad you never knew me? That is what it is to be Nephilim and embrace your nature. Time has tempered me Max, without all those centuries of loneliness I might still be that person."

"Simon you have to tell us what you did."

"I don't know what I did, I'm afraid to know what I did." I snarled. The chains on my wrists and ankles rattled with my movements.

"Genocide." A cold voice said. I looked around, I don't know why I couldn't even see Max let alone this new person.

"We've sent probes to the Ori city. Its gone, the whole planet has collapsed into itself, the city, all the priors and soldiers, even the Orici, its all gone." The voice continued.

I gaped like a landed fish.

"What? No no not genocide, I'm not an angel, I wouldn't . . ." I was babbling. The door to the isolation room opened, admitting Max and Jack.

"Jack I couldn't have –"

"Don't argue it, it happened."

"How?" I asked. Despair thick in my voice.

"We don't know."

"But, it wasn't me, I mean not anymore that part of me is dead has been dead for a hundred millennia."

"You're saying that was you as a child?"

"You think teenagers today are hard to deal with? Yes that was me as an adolescent, hard to imagine a whole city full of us, yes? Why do you think God ordered us destroyed? We are the most terrible force to enter the cosmos, the rage and hate of a human with the powers and cruelties of an angel the worst aspects of God's most beloved creations!" I shrieked. Jack backed away and the door closed. Max spoke in the dark.

"They're going to lock you away or kill you."

"Good." I panted.

"Good?"

"You still don't get it do you? I don't care if I die, I don't want to see humans hurt by me don't you see? To hurt a human makes me angelic and that is the WORST thing I could ever be. To be angelic to me is to be inhuman, to feel nothing worthwhile, to hate and tear at that which you should love because 'duty' calls for it. I would rather die than become that hateful survivor again, or hurt a single human. So yes kill me, or lock me away. Put me in the basement and pour concrete in around me, I don't care!" I roared and sagged against my chains in exhaustion. There was a brief blast of light as Max opened the door walked through it and closed it.

So they did, they left me in chains, locked the dozens of doors behind them and sealed the two floors above me in heavy weight foundation concrete. Every nook, every cranny, the ventilation shafts and maintenance access points, emergency exits and storage areas, everything was filled in and I was erased from the records of the SGC.

I have the power to shatter my chains and destroy the SGC, I could fly over these mountains raining death down upon the people. But I don't want to, I'm happy here, I don't want to leave.

Sometimes in the dark, I hear wings, I hear feathers drifting through the silent dust choked air and I fear Kushiel. I hear the soft steps of feet that have never worn shoes, that have only ever known rough earth and air and I feel fear. Other times I feel the angel in me stir nauseatingly, like some dark and powerful parasite churning in my chest and demanding sacrifice.

So I test my bonds and deny my power and pray to God that he will listen, that he will pity and make me a normal man.

He doesn't answer.