If you asked her, Valerie Gray would say she was used to getting weird ass customers. I mean, you'd have to be a little weird to walk into a tiny coffee shop that's right across the street from the literal Nasty Burger. Usually they just got fanfiction-writing nerds and book worms that were too preoccupied with reading to even glance at the cup of coffee that they absentmindedly ordered. Every so often Valerie would find someone she used to be friends with in highschool standing on the seat to get a better picture of their perfectly arranged bagel and foamy cup of coffee before taking a sip and a bite and walking back out the door. And then there was that guy that stopped in every Saturday morning and just sat by the window, staring out with a glazed sort of look in his eyes. Oh, and Valerie couldn't forget that old couple that only spoke in whispers and sent death glares toward Nasty Burger, discussing in whispers about how bad that place was for your health.

Yeah, Espresso Patronum was certainly a hotspot for weirdos. Valerie was 99.9% sure that she had seen it all.

And then, one day, a girl walked in.

Her long, wavy black hair, which would easily reach her butt if put down, was pulled into a high ponytail with a bright blue hair band that matched her eye color exquisitely. Her white shirt very clearly read "drop dead gorgeous" and was accompanied by a tiny cartoon ghost. She was wearing baggy gray sweatpants and Christmas-colored slippers that clashed horribly but somehow just worked for her, and, when she moved to find a seat, Valerie caught sight of a tiny cartoon ghost tattooed on the inside of her elbow.

Valerie felt her heart skip a beat, because holy shit that girl was hot.

Cedric, who had started working at Espresso Patronum because he thought the irony was "fucking hilarious," walked out from behind the counter, straightened his apron, and started heading towards the girl. Valerie pushed him out of the way and pulled out her little notebook with practiced ease.

"Good afternoon; my name's Valerie. What can I get for you today?" she recited, pushing a strand of curly brown hair out of her face and ignoring Cedric's incoherent sounds of anger from behind. Now that she was closer, Val could clearly see tiny freckles dotting her cheeks and nose and a healthy blush lighting her skin. She had multiple earrings in, all of which were simple studs, and a tiny little crystal nose piercing that was almost impossible to spot unless you studied her as closely as Valerie was studying her at that exact moment. The girl, who was easily eighteen, by Valerie's calculations, glanced up at the sound of Val's voice. Her eyes sparkled in the dim café light.

"Holy shit; you're hot. I'll have a slice of you and also a double espresso, please."

Valerie was so shell-shocked that she dropped her notepad on the floor. She was sure that her entire face was glowing red.

"Ok, maybe not the slice of you. Was that too straightforward? That was too straightforward. Sorry, I don't really have a filter. Name's Danielle, by the way, but everyone calls me Dani. Nice to meet you, Valerie."

Valerie was still frozen to the spot, jaw unhinged in utter shock. Cedric had to come up behind her to pull her away from the scene.

"God, you're horrible with hot girls. This is why you shoulda let me handle it." He whispered, steering her towards the kitchen. "Do you even remember what she ordered?"

"She called me hot."

"Wow, of course she's gay. Great. Perfect. Why would the only hot girl that walks in here be straight? No offense, Val."

"She ordered a double espresso."

"I just mean to say that you're not my type, I mean, I see you more as a sister, I just—"

"Cedric?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up before I break your nose."

"Double espresso coming right up."

Valerie straightened her apron self consciously. God, she had completely froze out there! She fought ghosts in her free time and she couldn't even look the cute girl at the café in the eye! She blew a curl out of her face. Wasn't she supposed to be good at this?

Valerie glanced over at Danielle, who was interesting herself in the sugar cube bowl situated in the center of the table. She popped a sugar cube in her mouth and clicked her nails against the table distractedly.

"Here's the double espresso, Val," Cedric said, coming up behind her.

"I thought you liked Dani?"

"Val, she's gay, you're gay."

"I'm bi."

"Irrelevant. You guys are, like, that perfect homosexual match."

Valerie glared at him.

"Go get her, tiger."

Val sighed, straightened her apron again, and headed over to Danielle's table. Fuck, she was shaking. Her heart felt like it was pounding out of her chest.

Talking to pretty girls was so much harder than fighting ghosts, Valerie decided.

"Here's your order," she said, trying to steady her hand to set the espresso on the table.

"Sit with me?" Dani queried.

"What?"

"Would you like to sit with me?"

"Uh, I'm kinda working…" Valerie trailed off, glancing behind her at Cedric.

"JUST SIT DOWN, DAMMIT," Cedric yelled across the room, startling a boy in the corner wearing giant glasses and reading a rather thick book. His coffee splashed onto the table and Cedric rushed to help, sending a thumbs up towards Valerie whilst simultaneously apologizing.

I hate that boy, Valerie decided, sliding into the booth opposite Danielle.

"That your boyfriend?" Dani asked.

"Oh, hell no," Val answered, eyes widening a fraction. "He's way too much work."

"Thank God. For a second I thought you were straight."

"Just because I'm not into Cedric doesn't mean I'm gay," Valerie argued, sending Danielle a look that was both confused and a bit angry. She had a habit of hiding her fear behind an angry façade.

"Am I wrong?"

Valerie said nothing.

Dani laughed, throwing her head back. Strands of baby hair that had been tucked behind her ears spilled forth, gently framing her face. "You can't fool me, Valerie. You travel the world and you learn some stuff about homosexuals."

"That's not at all what I thought you learned while travelling the world. Besides, aren't a bit young for that?"

"For what? Adventure? Bullshit. I just got back from Australia like," Dani glanced at the clock over the store door, "thirty minutes ago."

"And the first thing you did when you got home was go to a Harry Potter themed café?" Val queried, crinkling her nose.

"I happen to be a fan of Harry Potter, thank you very much."

"Didn't tack you as a nerd, Dani."

"Didn't tack you as a bitch, Val." Danielle stuck her tongue out at that and then proceeded to hide her smile behind her coffee cup.

Valerie felt her fear ebb away. It was so damn easy to talk to her.

"Hey, don't do that." Danielle said suddenly.

"Do what?"

"That grin thing."

"Why the hell can't I grin?"

"'Cus it's fucking cute! I just wanted a cup of coffee, dammit."

Valerie snorted. "Maybe you shouldn't have called me hot."

"Maybe you shouldn't have been hot," Dani retorted, sipping her drink. "Ow, fuck!"
"What?"
"I burnt ma tangue," she answered, letting her tongue flop out of her mouth. "I'm ganna thue."

"You're gonna what?"

"Thue! I'm ganna thue!"

"Say that again, please?" Valerie was trying her damndest not to smile and, yet, still managing to fail miserably.

"Thuck you!"

Valerie burst into a fit of laughter, her hand coming down to smack the table. Dani glared, tongue still sticking out, a grin lifting the corners of her lips.

And then Valerie heard Danielle gasp lightly and looked up just in time to see concern twist her features.

"Fuck me," she whispered, tongue back in her mouth.

"What?"

"I gotta go."

"Where?"

"My, uh, cousin wanted to meet up with me after I landed and I totally forgot." Danielle stood. "How much do I owe you?"

"It's on the house," Valerie insisted, standing as well. She was surprised at the sudden cut in conversation and found herself missing it already. "Well, I guess I'll see yo—"

"Hold up. Gimme your pen."

"My what?"

"The pen that's in your apron pocket, ya goob." Danielle glanced out the window, searched the sky with one quick sweep of her eyes, and smirked at Valerie.

"Oh! Here." She passed it over.

Dani rolled her eyes, reached across the table, and grabbed Valerie's wrist. She wrote down a collection of numbers and finished it with a little cartoon ghost, which was something that Valerie had started associating with her.

"Call me later, okay?"

It wasn't until then that Valerie realized that that collection of numbers was Danielle's phone number. "Oh. Oh! Okay!"

"See ya."

"Bye!"

Danielle rushed out the door with a small little wave, the bell dinging softly as she left.

"You scare her off?" Cedric asked, coming up behind Valerie.

"I got her number."

"Really? That fast? That's impressive. What'd she run off for, then?"

"She had to see her cousin."

Cedric snorted. "That sounds suspiciously fake. I'm honestly confused whether she wants to talk to you or she was just trying to get away from you."

Valerie turned on her heel, coming face to face with Cedric. "Hey, shut it! I'm sure she was just busy."

And then a ghost came straight through the opposite wall and landed with a crash behind the counter, followed by a black and white blur.

Phantom.

"Oh, would you look at the time, Cedric! I gotta go!"

"Your shift doesn't end for another two hours!"

Valerie was already out the door, hiding behind a trash bin beside the café, and letting the cool metal that made up her suit envelope her entire body through tiny openings in her wrists and ankles.

She grinned from underneath her mask.

A cute girl gave her her number and now she got to kick some ghost's ass. She decided to mark today off as a good day.

Valerie jumped and her hover board popped out from the bottom of her shoes. She couldn't think about that right now. That black and white blur just had to be Phantom.

Duty calls.


first off, i'd like to say that this isnt one of my better works. i read through it and its pretty choppy and rushed and just not very good. i realized i was edging towards 2,000 words and i tried to stop real fast. i dont have time to get too invested in dannymay oneshots ! so yeah, i'm sorry. if it eases your inevitable need for more whatsoever, the black and white blur is actually danielle and there was probably a reveal somewhere in there in which valerie freaked the fuck out and cedric cowered behind the counter, idk. it's up to your imagination! i'm sorry. i actually am. i'm just trying to finish up writing thESE FRICKING DANNYMAY FICS SO I CAN GET BACK TO FFAK BC I MISS IT

review fucker

xx