(vii)
Someone had placed a seat on Richard Woolsey's new favourite balcony. It had a small table attached to the arm, perfect for drinks and reports.
That morning he had a large mug of coffee, a stack of mission reports, a raisin and cinnamon bagel and a wonderful view to enjoy. As breakfasts went it was pretty good.
A noise behind him made him jump and drop half his bagel. His Karma obviously wasn't living up to his mood, it landed butter side down on his thigh and flopped to the floor, also butter side down.
"Damn."
"Sorry."
Woolsey looked up from rubbing butter of his uniform with a thin paper napkin shredding faster than it was cleaning. Ronon was looming behind him in the shadow of the doorway.
"Not at all," he said formally, he picked up his fallen breakfast and wistfully dropped it on his plate. "Can I help you?" he asked, wiping his fingers.
"Needed some air."
"Ah," Richard gave the Satedan an assessing look, "if you want some solitude I'd nearly finished my breakfast."
"No," Ronon shrugged.
Woolsey checked his watch, "Shouldn't you be heading to the mission briefing for the trip to Tipeka? I should be on my way myself."
Ronon grunted irritably, "McKay and Zelenka have been arguing for twenty minutes about pebbles and the com system."
Woolsey grimaced sympathetically, "all the same…"
"Lorne's going instead. I've asked for a couple of days…" Ronon paused as if he was searching for the word, "vacation?" He lifted an eyebrow, asking for confirmation.
Richard nodded briefly, considering. Strictly speaking John Sheppard was in charge of personnel deployment on a day to day basis. Still, as Expedition Commander he passed the Tipeka mission under mental review before deciding that Ronon's presence was hardly necessary. Lorne in fact might be an advantage; the mission required the kind of diplomacy where "nice doggie" was more appropriate than a big "rock." Aside from the stomach upsets there was nothing to worry about and Dr Keller's team seemed to be on top of that.
He nodded once, "I see no harm in that."
Ronon didn't seem to be listening; he yawned and stretched moving out of the shadows to lean on the balustrade.
"Good lord!" In the sunlight Woolsey could see Ronon's patchwork of bruises. "Is that why you require some time off?"
"No, sparing." Ronon replied economically. He was getting bored with comments about his bruises, everyone in the briefing room had commented on them, at length and with attempts at humour, except Teyla of course.
"Really," Richard frowned, "since you never seem to incapacitate yourself seriously I suppose I cannot complain, but…" He pulled himself up short; Ronon was giving him one of those looks. These days Woolsey didn't find them intimidating as such, but they did make him think about the worth of what he was saying before he actually said it. "Yes, well, perhaps it's just as well you aren't going, don't want you scaring anyone," he smiled blandly and got up, carefully balancing his stack of reports. "Enjoy your time off."
He was halfway through the door when Ronon pulled him up short with an incredibly unexpected question.
"You ever been married?"
Richard's brain froze for a second or two, "yes," he finally said.
"Did she die?"
"No, we were divorced," he looked at Ronon enquiringly, "are you familiar with the term?"
"You undid the marriage, John did too."
Feeling that this must be going somewhere Richard walked back to the chair and put his reports on the seat, holding onto his coffee he leant against a wall and waited. The silence stretched and he was just starting to feel foolish when Ronon spoke.
"We didn't get married on Sateda."
Woolsey frowned, "do you mean you personally didn't get married to someone specifically?"
Ronon turned around and leaned on the Balustrade again. "No, no-one got married. Not for centuries, not since the Wraith came because it was decided not to make promises we couldn't keep."
"Because you couldn't promise to be together forever?" Richard clarified.
Ronon nodded, lapsing into silence.
Richard waited. Though the members of the Atlantis mission might not believe it this situation was not completely alien to him. He'd always maintained a certain distance from his co-workers that occasionally led them to view him in the light of a confessor or therapist. He'd always assumed it was a result of his legal training, eliciting confidence was a part of the skill set. He knew that if Ronon really wanted to get something off his chest then the best way to encourage him was to keep his peace and wait.
"There was someone I wasn't married to." Ronon finally said.
Richard nodded.
"She died in the Wraith attack on Sateda."
"I'm sorry," Richard said simply and let the silence drift again.
Ronon stared off into the distance, "We were together since we were half grown. The longer we were together…" Ronon shrugged.
Richard wasn't sure that Ronon was actually talking to him. He, Richard, was just there.
"It wasn't going well, she was a healer I was a soldier. We thought we could be together through everything, I cared for her more than anyone, but … we weren't children anymore," he shrugged, "I'd moved back to the Barracks when the Wraith arrived."
"And then she died." Richard finished for him. "You must feel guilty, even though it wasn't your fault."
Ronon simply shrugged.
"Has there been anyone else?" Mr Woolsey prompted.
Ronon shook his head, "Even if I'd wanted it wouldn't have been fair." He shifted as if the memories were making him uncomfortable in his skin.
Richard managed a surreptitious glance at his watch. The well being of the expedition members was his concern, but he had the mission briefing and he was due to contact Stargate command for the daily report in thirty five minutes. If it had been almost anyone else he might have suggested a session with a therapist. Dr Goodhall had been on staff for a little while and seemed to have settled in well, but, Richard considered the man in front of him, there was no way he could imagine Ronon sitting down in the taupe confines of the Doctors office and bearing his soul.
He chewed the inside of his cheek, a good lawyer and he supposed a good therapist knew when to push a little.
"I noticed you were spending a lot of time with Doctor Keller a little while back."
Ronon dipped his head without making it a clear affirmative but Mr woolsey choose to take it that way.
"I also notice that Dr Keller is now romantically involved with Doctor McKay."
Another un-specific head dip.
"I can understand that that might be difficult, after I separated from my wife we still worked in the same office for a while."
"Doesn't matter."
Woolsey frowned again, Ronon really did sound and his body language confirmed that he was okay with Dr Keller and McKay's relationship. Which left him confused, if that wasn't the issue what was? He took another quick look at his watch and stood. "I'm sorry Ronon I have to go, but if you wish to talk to me again I usually come here for breakfast." He got up and brushed the last lingering crumbs from his pant legs. "Perhaps it would have been better if no-one had put a chair here, then I wouldn't get so messy." He saw Ronon was looking puzzled and he smiled, "I used to eat over the balcony, the only sufferers for my crumbs were sea birds."
Ronon nodded, half smiling, still pre-occupied.
"Feel free to use the chair."
