Disclaimer: I don't own LotR. Only my characters and my plot.

Chapter Quote: "Does 'happily ever after' mean they got married and lived together forever?"


Chapter Nine

Winter


The war had gotten worse. How did one know this when an immense forest encircled our tiny village for thousands of miles? Well, the villagers themselves knew. The spiders had seemed to become only more violent of late and were a reason of constant worry on everyone's mind. Including my own, I don't know how many nights I woke up in a cold sweat do to nightmares. Besides that, the orcs had started to invade the woods. Mirkwood's soldiers were constantly on alert, and dreadful rumors of bloody battles were whispered through the surrounding villages until they festered in Gilloth. These, of course, did nothing to alleviate my own fears.

Once the Harvest was over and the hints of winter bore down upon the village, all the eligible male elves were called up to return to military service. Twenty such elves had returned home for the Harvest within the three villages that made up a thirty mile perimeter. Faerlain was one of these elves.

I had thought our time together would never end. But I could have never dissuaded him from the unflinching loyalty he possessed when it came down to defending all that he loved. Until that day when he had been wounded, the thought of war in a place like this had seemed impossible. Yet now, as I and all the other villagers stood assembled out on the fringes of the forest, this war delt more real to me then ever before.

I found I had nothing to say as I watched Faerlain pack up his own gear and assemble the other elves. He looked so handsome in his elven armor... tall, strong, and invincible. Imagining what that armor would need to protect him from made me shudder with fear. I had no idea what orcs were, or why the villagers were so afraid of the spiders, or why they were even at war. But their fear was contagious, and the unknown is always more terrifying. I felt numbed by that fear as I stood staring, watching him prepare to leave.

At last came the good-byes.

The soldiers said good-bye to their families and friends, Faerlain exchanged a tearful parting with his mother, and then he stepped over to me. I didn't know what to say and I felt an intense terror rise in my chest as the realization hit me that I might never see him again.

With my heart aching with this longing, I ran to him and pressed myself tightly against him. I squeezed my shut tightly against the threat of tears as I felt his arms wrap about me, pulling me firmly against him. I cursed this foreign war that insisted on taking him from me. I cursed the hard, cold armor that separated me from the warmth of his body. But I found I had nothing to say as he slowly released me, holding me from him at arms length. He offered me his gentle smile as he tipped my chin up and looked into my face.

"So... will you miss me? I was getting worried when you didn't say anything."

My eyes burned, but I forced a smile upon my face as I nudged him playfully. "You big oaf..." My smile faded slightly. "Try to come back in one piece?" He leaned down and placed a soft kiss on my cheek.

"I'll be back before you know it." He said quietly, and I put on the bravest face I could manage.

"I'll hold you to that... I don't have forever you know." He squeezed my arm, and, raising my hand to his face, pressed his lips to my fingers. Then he let go.

"Good-bye." He said, meeting my gaze. He rounded up the others and they mounted their horses. They turned toward the forest and before I knew it, they had gone, riding out of sight beneath the bronzed canopies. I wanted then so badly to tell him just how much I cared for im. How I never wanted to be parted from him. How I loved him.

But he was gone, and my whispered words of tenderness blew away on the autumn wind, unanswered, long after he had disappeared beneath the trees.


The snows came a week later. It kind of just comes on all of a sudden, winter in Mirkwood. One day, the leaves were still falling, and the next- the world was white. Of course, the Star-Flowers themselves never die, the leaves on the trees do, but the flowers live on. Glowing softly in the darkness at night, beacons in the darkness.

Once the storms really got going, it was dangerous to even leave the house. It was easy to get lost in the forest if you were unlucky enough to miss your destination in the village. For the first week or so, I couldn't go out at all. Even when the snow stopped, the winder blew it in drifts that were past my waist in some places. Which meant that, yes, it was bitterly cold now and the snow was much too deep for me to walk through.

I felt a little stir crazy, cooped up in Mirlaic's flet while most of the elves went about their business, tromping about here and there, on top of the snow.

Literally, they walked right on top of the stuff, it was amazing! It was like they floated or something... they barely even left footprints. Beside the point that they hardly seemed to feel the cold at all.

I always seemed to be cold now and it was near suicidal to venture out of the flet that first few weeks of winter. When it really got going, the temperature (I imagine) hovered below zero and the visibility was usually less then but a few inches before you. This meant, for a while, I could do little but drift listlessly through the house. I couldn't get my mind off of Faerlain and what dangers awaited him on the battlefield. But most of all I felt explicitly useless, which I hated most of all.

I couldn't venture outside for sometime, so excursions with Talorta were out of the question. Mirlaic found my agitation somewhat laughable I think, thought she'd never say as much. Afterall, what were but a few weeks of inactivity to her? But she had no idea how my mind wrestled with fear, listlessness, and sanity day in and out. And having no where to run to in order to work those troubles out was maddening.

By the time there was a break in the snow storm almost three weeks later, I was practically begging for Mirlaic to give me any errand at all to get me out of the house. Even a little while would be a piece of heaven.

So she gave me a basket with some herbs and soup and sent me over to visit one of her patients, Elenowen. I discovered that she was the wife of Cudir, a good friend of Faerlain's who had also been with him when they had discovered me in the forest. Since Cudir's last leave and impending absence, Elenowen had become very pregnant. Mirlaic told me she was due within a month now, and the thought of delivering her first child without her husband was troubling her greatly. I was thrilled to finally have something I could do as I trudged through the snow which was nearly waist high in some places where the winter drafts had blown it into drifts.

Elenowen's flet was practically on the other side of the village. And after hauling my body through the thick snow throughout the tedious trek, I was nearly drenched in sweat by the time I rapped on the door. Waiting on the steps, I unwrapped the scarf from about my head and neck and stood, panting with exhaustion, when the door swung open.

There was a little girl standing in its entrance way.

I've never been particularly fond of children, it wasn't as though I hated them- I just hadn't had much experience with them. But this little thing made me want to laugh as she darted behind the door once more and sneaked quick glances at me as I stood there. "I'm looking for Elenowen, may I come in?" I asked. I couldn't tell if she nodded or not, but the two bright blue orbs never left my face as the door swung open a tad wider.

I shrugged off my damp over-cloak as I entered. There was a small fire burning in the hearth. I knew that elves were not bothered by the cold, which meant the fire only offered a small amount of heat. I didn't mind thought, I was still breathless from the hike over here. The little girl shut the door behind me and I smiled encouragingly at her as she darted past me and disappeared within the next room.

I felt a tad awkward, standing there in a stranger's house. "It's a start." I mumbled. I hung my cloak up on a hook by the door and then walked further into the house. There was a common room by the hearth. Which itself was surrounded by a number of cushioned chairs. I was about to call for Elenowen when I saw the little girl again. This time she was standing behind one of the chairs. I felt a smile tugging at the corners of my mouth. "Hello again." I said. She didn't respond, just stared curiously at me.

I tried again, this time in Sindarin. 'I'm Victoria... do you have a name?' She ducked behind the chair once more and I shook my head in amusement. 'If you won't tell me your name I shall just have to think of a new one for you. Will mouse do?' I sighed dramatically when she didn't appear. 'Then there is no one to take this delicious, hot soup to poor Elenowen. I just know she'd like it so much.'

I saw her eyes once more, hidden behind long locks of dark brown hair. This time I could see the tips of her pointed ears as she stuck her head out further. 'Tell you what, I'll tell you a story and then you can help me bring this to Elenowen. Will you do that for me?' Mouse hesitated, and then nodded slowly.

I racked my brain, it was my challenge. I wanted to get Mouse to speak. So I searched for a really good story, one I had always liked till finally I decided upon Cinderella. 'Once upon a time...' By the time I got to the part with the fairy godmother, her face had changed completely. And when Cinderella danced with the prince she was sitting on the chair itself.

She was dressed plainly, a dark brown smock with black leg wrappings and a tan scarf around her neck. Her eyes were wide, the fire reflecting brightly in them as I told her the story. '...and she and the prince lived happily ever after.'

I stopped, waiting for her reaction, when I received none added, "The end." slipping back into English, or the common tongue as it's called around here. And for a moment I wondered if I had gotten my Sindarin accent right when suddenly she blurted out.

"Does 'happily ever after' mean they got married and lived together forever?" She also spoke in the common tongue which surprised me greatly.

"Yes."

"And they were very happy?"

I nodded.

She relaxed into the chair and sighed, "It was a good story."

I smiled. "I'm glad you like it Mouse. By the way, that's not your name is it?"

A shy smile passed over her fine features. "I am called Ana." She said. It was strange really, talking to her like this. Immortality was a daunting concept, and I had forgotten that even the elves had to start out somewhere. It was refreshing to speak with Ana.

Her brows met in concentration and she looked up at me again. "You are a human, aren't you?" When I nodded, she stood and gazed at me curiously. "I don't think you look at that different." She said decidedly.

I laughed. "Perhaps not... but I think your ears are much more interesting then mine."

She cocked her head, studying my rounded ears, and then she giggled. The brighter smile that followed was small, but it likewise illuminated a face that looked like it had been sad for much too long.

"Astonishing." Came a voice from a doorway opposite the hearth. I turned and saw a dark-haired, elven maid with an obvious bulge in her stomach, watching me with a smile. "You must be Victoria." She said in the same accented voice I had grown so used to from listening to Mirlaic. "Mirlaic said she might be sending you along one of these days to visit me. But imagine, getting little Ana to speak!" She walked slowly into the room, pressing a hand to her swollen stomach and grimacing slightly as she lowered herself into a chair.

Ana, still smiling, turned to her with excitement. "Victoria is very good at telling stories." She informed her. Elenowen's house was small, not quite the same size of Mirlaic's. But it had that hint of youth to it that Mirlaic's lacked, and I guessed it had to do with containing the energy that Ana hid so effectively.

Elenowen glanced at the younger girl and took her hand. "You must thank her, would you make us some tea, iel? That's a good girl." Ana headed off merrily to the kitchen, repeating her favorite parts of Cinderella under her breath. She turned to me again. "I'm sorry if I kept you waiting, I was napping when I heard the two of you talking."

"I'm sorry if we woke you-" I said quickly, eyeing her stomach as she rubbed it affectionately.

"Don't trouble yourself, I'm just not as quick on my feet as I used to be." She smiled. "It is a pleasure to meet you however, Mirlaic has told me so much about you. And then Ana..." She shook her head, chuckling softly. "... you must have some magic about you. I've never seen to take to anyone like that before."

"Is she your daughter?"

"No... Cudir, my husband, is her older brother. She rarely speaks with anyone, but especially since he's been away she hardly says anything. Her parents died in an orc attack long ago she's lived with us ever since." I blinked in surprise, it had not occurred to me that elves would suffer as regular people do. "No... I love Ana as if she were my own but..." She glanced down at her stomach again. "... this little one will be my first."

"I guess Cinderella cheered her up a bit." I said, smiling at Ana as balanced two cups of steaming liquid and walked carefully back to us..

"Who?" She asked, glanced at me with an amused twinkle in her eyes.

"It was the story I told her."I explained, thanking Ana as she handing me my cup.

Alphril chuckled as Ana handed her the box. . "If it cheers this little one up, I think I should like to hear that story as well." She turned to the little girl, who's pointed ears seem to stick out awkwardly through her hair. "Thank you Ana. I was just telling Victoria how you like to help me while your brother is gone." Ana nodded and then looked up at me.

"Will you tell me another story Victoria?"

I laughed. "Maybe another time Ana, Mirlaic is waiting for me. But you can visit me any time and I shall tell you a different story."

I stayed the afternoon with Elenowen and Ana. We heated the soup for supper and ate a hearty meal. Cudir hadn't been able to stay the whole break for harvest when he had come. And Elenowen, apparently, hadn't really started to get so large until he'd been away. I learned that she was especially nervous about delivering their child without him, and I promised to come and visit as often as I could in the weeks to follow.

I enjoyed Elenowen's company very much. At times, I felt so young sitting next to her. If she were mortal, I don't imagine that she would have been much older than me. But I couldn't even almost imagine having children, and by myself while my husband was away at war. Her husband. I felt an ache for her as I thought of the fear and anxiety she must be going through every day now. And I whispered a prayer for her as I said my good-byes and headed home.


"Cinderella aye?" Mirlaic was smiling as I told her about what had happened at Elenowen's flet. "I know Ana and Elenown very well. And poor Cudir... I helped to bring both he and his sister into this world. Their mother was such a young, sweet thing." She shook her head. "It was such a shame... their deaths. It was very hard on that little one- she was such a tiny thing at the time. Poor child... he has had to leave Ana after all this time. But, hopefully, his contribution to this war will rid it of those who would harm us and then he will be able to come home."

War.

It stung like a hot poker and left my mouth dry and my tongue feeling like parchment. War. The deliverer of death. I thought of little Ana's sweet face and my heart broke for her loss. I couldn't imagine losing both of my parents. A lonely, little girl and an expectant mother were my newest friends. Who would have known? I helped Mirlaic prepare her herbs and I reminisced of Spring in Gilloth. I was already counting the days until the snow would melt.


With January came the new year, (Not that it mattered, for time itself mattered little to these people). When I wasn't visiting Elenowen or helping Mirlaic around the house, I was telling stories to Ana- who appeared all the time at Mirlaic's doorstep. On occasion, she brought a friend, which amused me to no end since I was still getting used to the idea that there were any children even in the village.

Elenowen grew more and more nervous as her baby's due date drew closer. I did what I could to console her, but I knew nothing would ease her nerves until her husband returned. Her child would be in the first baby to be born in Gilloth in a long while. Because of this, the day was awaited by the whole village with great anticipation.

I made a point of visiting her nearly every day, and when I did not come she was at our flet. She spoke often to Mirlaic about childbirth, the baby being her first and anticipating delivering it without Cudir made her very anxious.

I was trudging through the snow to Alphril's flet one morning, Mirlaic needed supplies and sent me over. Despite the added burden of trudging through the snow, I didn't mind. Being cooped up inside all the time was making me stir-crazy.

The snow was crisp and the air clear. If the sun had been out it would have blinded me. A cold wind was blowing through the trees and I pulled my winter cloak tighter about my shoulders as I crossed the barren streets. The storm seemed not only to kill the plants and trees, but also much, if not all, of Gilloth's social gatherings. I was almost at Alphril's when I heard light footsteps coming up behind me. It was Ana and she was running frantically towards me.

"Victoria! Victoria!" She called, stopping in front of me and glanced down at my feet. "You can't walk on snow?" Momentarily distracted by her distress. Then she shook her head before I could answer. "I guess not."

Ana's eyes widened with fear and she looked back up into my face. Her ears were red from the cold and snow flakes whirled from her dark locks as she shook her head again. "Elenowen says her time is near, you must come quickly!"

Now my eyes widened, "I don't know anything about babies Ana!"

"Surely Mirlaic has taught you something?"

"A little but..."

"I little is enough! I will get Mirlaic, but please go to her!" Ana's large eyes were gazing intently into mine, I could see her fear, her nervousness. I lock my jaw, my resolve hardening into determination.

"All right, but go. Quickly!" She darted off into the hazy streets, her footsteps not even make the faintest tracks on the snow. I whirled and bounded towards Elenowen's house. My heart was pounding fiercely against my chest, and I as neared I began to feel light-headed. Even if I got there in time, would I be able to do anything? The snow was up to my knees and I had to lift my legs high in order to run. I leaped, my muscles straining with the effort.

By the time I reached her door, my lungs were heaving for air and my legs were shaking, threatening to collapse. I opened the door to her flet and stumbled inside. I leaned against the wall to catch my breath and then slowly walked inside. I couldn't hear anything at first as I pealed off my soaked cloak and closed the door behind me.

"Elenowen?" I called breathlessly, I brushed back damp locks of my hair away from my face. No one answered and I called again. "Elenowen?" Finally I heard moaning, coming from a room in the back of the flet.

I ran and found Elenowen in the doorway of her bedroom, her face was twisted in pain, her hands clutching the frame tightly as I knelt at her side. "Elenowen!"

"Victoria! Is that you?" She whispered weakly, she moaned and clutched her stomach.

"Yes, it's me." I took her hand and squeezed it. I wrapped my arm around her shoulder and pulled her to her feet.

"I'm so frightened Victoria...I'm afraid... I might... that I'll-."

"No such thing will be happening to you, you'll be fine!" I said firmly, struggling as I led her to her bed and she groaned once more.

"Where're Mirlaic?" She asked frantically, breathing deeply as she slid onto her bed.

"On her way. Don't worry. I know exactly what to do." I smiled and brushed her forehead comfortingly. What do they always use in movies? Water... blankets... oh God, Mirlaic, please get her quickly!! It was my biggest lie, and I could only pray everything would be all right.


I can hardly remember what happened all day. I felt light-headed and so nervous that I felt like I might die. But after it all, and this part I remember very well, was cradling a small baby girl in my arms. Just as Mirlaic rushed in the door.


News of the baby's birth spread like wildfire. And so had the fact that Elenowen had named her Turwethiel, which is the Elvish version of my name. The little thing had dark hair, just like her mother's, and the clearest blue eyes I had ever seen. Elenowen said they were from Cudir, her father.

At first I'm sure the villagers didn't quite sure what to think of me. After practically ignoring my existence after half a year they had two options, to praise my bravery, or to be appalled that one of their own had been delivered by a mortal. I hardly listened to the gossip, and nearly every day went to see Elenowen. I held baby Turwethiel in my arms, whispering her English name to her when no one was looking. I loved the way her tiny hands would grasp around my large, rough fingers. I loved to caress her dark locks, which unlike her mother's, were slightly curly.

"If it weren't for you, you know, I don't think I would have made it." Elenowen said a week later as I kissed Turwethiel's hand while Elenowen sat down to rest. I blushed,

"Don't be silly, you did all the work." I recalled how Elenowen had struggled and fought for her daughter's birth, and I shook my head. Childbirth... bleh.

She was still weak, the birth had been difficult for her. She was sitting in a large, cushioned chair. "No, I was close to giving up. If you hadn't been there...I don't know what would have happened."

I didn't reply. Some things just don't have answers. Besides, sometimes I didn't know what to think at all. I was just relieved that my friend was all right.

"How's Talorta?" She asked, taking little Turwethiel back from me and preparing to nurse her.

"He's a little stir crazy because of the snow. But he's made some friends, and doesn't seem to mind too much."

Elenowen nodded, "He is a beautiful animal Victoria. He is one of your greatest friends... no?"

I smiled, that was a fact known without words. Talorta was why I was here, I had given everything for him, as he had given everything for me. We were bonded forever now. "Yes. He is."

I stretched my back as I straightened up again and glanced outside the windows. It was snowing harder now. Much harder then it had before. Strange. "It's getting worse out there." I said, voicing my thoughts.

"Yes, our winters are always hard." She replied.

I reached for my cloak and threw it over my shoulders. "I should go."

"Will you be able to find your way?"

I nodded and she took my hand, "Thank you Victoria, you are a true friend."

I smiled, 'So are you.' I answered in her own language.

"Will you come again soon?"

I paused to think, "Yes. Tomorrow morning. Early, and then you can help me with my letters." I was relearning the letters Faerlain had begun to instruct me in.

"I'm no scholar, but I'll do what I can." She smiled at me and squeezed my hand before releasing it. I braced myself for the cold and threw the door open, trudging into the rapidly filling streets.


TO BE CONTINUED...