Sinjin Van Cleef the weirdo

Sinjin: I'm starting a petition to get Jade to like me. "Like" this if you think I have a chance.

Sinjin: I wrote poems about Jade. I hope she reads them. They describe my feelings for her:

Poem 1:

Smile, yours is so white, The enamel on your teeth Is the highlight of my life.

Poem 2:

Just talked to Beck. Said you guys broke up.

I am your rebound.current avatar

Added by Catsvalentine

Poem 3:

Don't like me like that? There's always Tori or Cat But Trina scares me.

Jade: I can't believe this creep wrote poems about me and my own boyfriend never has!

Beck: Wait, some creep writes a poem about you and you blame me!? EXPLAIN THAT!

Sinjin: Still waiting for the gang to pick me up on our Venice Beach trip. I texted Jade, but she didn't answer. Waiting outside, man is it hot!

Sinjin: I got a app that says if your milk was expired. It didn't work.

Sinjin: It's so hot inside. I've been sleeping outside. I'm nice and cool... but covered with bug bites :(

Sinjin: Somebody said I was creepy today. Agree? Disagree?

Sinjin: Cutting my hair with one of those razors you hook up to the vacuum. Best haircut ever.

Sinjin: Bought a hair straightener. Straightened my hair. Results were disastrous.

Sinjin: Will people take me seriously if I start waxing my legs?

Tori: ...

Andre: ...

Robbie: ...

Sinjin: Jade has a very lovely home.

Jade: That's it, I'm buying a guard dog.

Sinjin: My mom accidentally shrunk my skinny jeans. Now I can't bend my legs.

Sinjin: I sit behind Jade in homeroom. She has the prettiest earlobes.

Sinjin: I've started doing eyebrow pushups. I now probably have the strongest brows in my class.

Sinjin: I just lost a raisin in my hair. Last time this happened it took me hours to find it.

Sinjin: I've been watching a show about hoarders—ya know, people who keep like everything. Sounds fun!

Sinjin: Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Trina: It was last week, weirdo.

Sinjin: I just got ask out by a hot blonde cheerleader ... APRIL FOOL'S! Nobody asked me out! Looks like the joke's on you!

Sinjin: Have you ever had one of those days where you show up at school and realized you forgot to put on pants?

Sinjin: I just got invited to be in a boy hair show. I didn't know those existed.

Sinjin: A rat snuck into our kitchen last night. Awesom! I've been wantin a new pet!

Sinjin: Working on a new gum flavor: Triple A Battery. It's quite shocking.

Sinjin: Bought a used retainer at a yard sale! Straight teeth: here I come!

Sinjin: Will someone please teach me how to dance? My grandma refuses to do it anymore.

Sinjin: What should the next wad of food on my locker be? I'm feeling meatloaf. Any other suggestions?

Sinjin: I found cat throw up in my backpack this morning. I'm half disgusted/half excited to glue it to my locker.

Sinjin: You know who I'd love to meet? The entire cast of iCarly. Probably won't ever happen though.

Sinjin: Does anyone else at Hollyward Arts have lice? I can't be the only one, right?

Sikowitz: Sinjin, I think I speak for everyone here when I say I'm not coming to school today... or for the rest of the week.

Sinjin: Sweater vests will NEVER go out of style!

Sinjin: Had an indoor picnic in my living room. Was attacked by an ants. Maybe my mom should call pest control.

Sinjin: I finally finished rearranging my underwear by color: lightest to darkest. My summer is really boring.

Sinjin: Wanna hear how I got my name? Yeah, I'd like to know too! #weirdname

Sinjin: I think my ankles are bloated. My socks are too tight. Gotta lay off the pretzels.

Sinjin: Hired someone to write funny status updates for me. Jade fired her. She was too cute.

Sinjin: Found a chunk of meatloaf under my pillow. Not sure how or when it got there, but it was delicious.

Trina: Every time I think about you, I want to throw up in my mouth.

Sinjin: At least you think about me.

Sinjin: I got asked to pose for the cover of the 2012 Awkward Teenage Boys Calendar. Should I be insulted or flattered?

Sinjin: Drove across the state to see the country's largest gas station. My family takes the worst vacations.

Sinjin: Saw Lady Gaga at the farmers market (at least I think it was her). Asked her if she liked my sock puppet video. She pretended not to hear me.

Sinjin: Can I stay with anyone while my house is being fumigated?

Rex: No.

Andre: Sorry.

Beck: uh...no.

Sinjin: Oh… okay. I've always wanted to sleep in a tent anyways.

Sinjin: I found a tooth on the street today! Sometimes I cannot believe how lucky I am!

Tori: Wait... you've been carrying around a street-tooth all day? And you don't find anything wrong with this?

Sinjin: Quite the opposite, Tori. There's nothing more right.

Tori: Ew.

Sinjin: Went to the gym. Fell off the treadmill. Broke a toe. I'm done going to the gym for awhile.

Sinjin: For my birthday, my parents got me a stick I can scratch my back with. I wanted a car, but you take what you can get.

Sinjin: Do skunks know how bad they smell? And if they do, do you think it makes them depressed?

Sinjin: Today I learned that mayonnaise makes a perfectly good substitute for hair gel. I had to use a lot though, so now my turkey sandwich is mayo-less.

Tori: I think I'm done with mayo for forever.

Sinjin: I made my own pants from bits of leftover carpet. I call them... carpet pants. I'm not very good at naming things.

Sinjin: Did you know that a lifeguard can kick you off the beach for being too awkward and gangly? I found that out the hard way.

Sinjin: A monkey at the zoo sneezed on me and now I think I have the flu. Sorry in Advance if I get you sick.

Beck: You can't get sick from a monkey sneezing on you. Animals have different germs than humans.

Jade: Is Sinjin human?

Sinjin: Halloween pumpkin is rotting on my front porch. I'll bring it to school tomorrow if anyone wants to sniff it.

Sinjin: Do I have the only family that does pizza on Thanksgiving instead of turkey? Is that weird?

Sinjin: Sikowitz didn't show up to school again so Jade decided to take over. She gave everyone detention—but she looked pretty doing it.

Sinjin: Do you know how hard it is to keep my hair looking this good all the time? Not very hard actually. My hair's just awesome I guess.

Sinjin: My facial hair was getting out of control, so I had to shave this morning. Never letting that happen again.

Beck:You have facial hair?

Sinjin: Yeah. Enough that I had to shave it off. #crazy.

Sinjin: Why is getting coal in your stocking a bad thing? In a couple of thousand years it can turn into a diamond! Van Cleefs in the future are gonna be rich!

Sinjin: My stomach growled so loudly I thought it was my phone vibrating. Then I realized I was just hungry... and no one called me.

Sinjin: I decided to cancel my gym membership. Why mess with perfection?

Sinjin: I saw some pics of myself when I was younger. Man, my hair was ridiculous back then.

Jade: Yeah it's totally awesome now.

Sinjin: Really, Jade? You think so?

Jade: No.

Sinjin: Y'know, I think Jade would like me more if I straightened my hair. BRB! Off to the barber!

Jade: I still wouldn't like you, but it would definitely be an improvement.

Sinjin: Late night talks on the phone with my girlfriend are the best! I already have the phone... now I just need the girl!

Sinjin: Thinking about going solo on Valentine's Day this year. Betcha it'll be really easy to get a table for one!

Sinjin: This Saturday, come to a taping of my new game show: Queries for Couples! Live from Northridge!

Rex: You know I'll be there!

Sinjin: I emptied the vacuum bag at my house. It's full of Cat hair. I don't own a cat. The mystery thickens

Sinjin: I frequently take pictures by myself in photo booths. That's not weird right?

Robbie: No, of course not. I do it all the time!

Sinjin: My family's going on a trip this weekend and we're staying in a motel! It's gonna be hard going back to the real world after all this!

Sinjin: I sent a dozen roses to myself but only three roses showed up. Not gonna complain though, three is better than nothing.

Sinjin: I have a giant knot in my hair. I think it's because I forgot to brush for …oh… I'd say at least 2 or 3 days.

Sinjin: Anyone want to go with me to get my tetanus shot? I have a habit of passing out in the presence of needles.

Sinjin: I accidentally got my foot stuck in the men's room urinal. Can anyone come and help? (Boys only)

Robbie: Been there, man.

Andre: How? How did you do that?

Tori: Ugh, urinals gross me out.

Sinjin: Trina asked me out during her first week at Hollywood Arts. I turned her down. Sinjin can smell desperation.

Sinjin: They're handing out free sunscreen in the school hallway today! Best! Day! Ever!

Sinjin: My barber just quit mid-haircut. Is my hair really that bad?

Sinjin: If i had a nickel for every time my cat threw up in my shoes, I'd have $4.85.

Sinjin: So glad my aunt finally got indoor plumbing. I'll never have to use an outhouse ever again!

Sinjin: Has anyone seen Burf? I'm working on an art project and he was supposed to model for , models are so difficult to work with.

Sinjin: My buddy Burf doesn't have his own Slap page yet. He says the world isn't ready for that much Burf yet.

Sinjin: Nothing like a good hip hop dance class to really get your heart going! Good work out ladies!

Sinjin: accidentally went thru the car wash with my windows down. Now my seats are wet, squishy, and soapy.

Sinjin: I found a chewed piece of meat that completely matches my outfit. What a lucky day!

Sinjin: Yesssss! Skinny jeans are on, with plenty of room in the waist for pizza. Gonna be a good night.

Sinjin: A guy stole my shoes on Hollywood Blvd today. But he said "Have a nice day" as he was running away. Nicest mugger I ever met.

Sinjin: I've taken up knitting. In exactly 4 days, I'll have a brand new bathing suit!

Sinjin: A bat just flew into my house! Looks like the VanCleefs have ourselves a new pet!

Sinjin: Y'know, you always hear about Crazy Cat Ladies, but never Crazy Cat Men. Maybe I'll become the first one ever!

Sinjin: If I could have any super power in the world, it would probably be the ability to straighten my hair with my mind.

Sinjin: Waiting in line with Burf at Wanko's for the big sale tomorrow! Any ladies wanna skip ahead and snuggle with us? We'll be here all night.

Sinjin: Man, there's so much good free food just lying around on the ground! Hollywood Arts is awesome!

Sinjin: Fun Fact: My morning breath smells exactly like 3 day old oatmeal.

Sinjin: They found my mom in Mexico! I hope she brings back a piñata for my birthday!

Sinjin: Flush Injustice! Support Tinkle-Aid! #BoysforEqualRestrooms

Sinjin: I had 4 butternut squashes in my locker and now they're gone! Either Burf knows my locker combination or Hollywood Arts has a ghost!

Sinjin: My neighbor said it was weird that I dig through his trash cans at night. I don't think so, he has much better trash than my family does.

Sinjin: It's the holiday season once again! Time for the Van Cleef traditional "Inflating of the Rubber Christmas Tree!"

Sinjin: Currently have my head shoved in a butterfly terrarium. Don't bother texting me, I'm super busy.

Sinjin: Finally found a girl who appreciates a good sock puppet show. Or as she calls it: ¡un espectáculo de títeres de calcetín!

Sinjin: I'm about to take my last bath of 2012! Hope it's a good one!

Sinjin: Say what you will about the Flour Bomber, the guy knows how to rock a one piece.

Sinjin: I just won an ugly sweater contest! True, I didn't know I was IN the contest, but a win's a win right!

Sinjin: At the mall, returning my grandma's gift. She got me NON-skinny jeans! It's like she doesn't even know me!

Sinjin: As a former nose picker, I feel like Jade and I really share a connection now. A sweet, snotty connection.

Sinjin: That's the second time in my life a toilet's been dropped on me. At least this time it was empty.

Sinjin: Stray Hallway Sodas! Yes! #BestDayEver!

Sinjin: Just got back from my man-date with Beck! We had a great time. I hope we can do it again soon!

Beck: Yeah, any time you want…. as long as you promise to never call it a "Man-Date".