A/N: Oh, this fic. It is my favourite right now, and it sure does seem to be a favourite with you guys too - thanks for all the fab feedback - and yet, I'm already throwing ideas around for new stories! lol Don't worry, this one (and my other two) have a fair way to go yet, but if you're interested in giving your opinion on what may be coming up in a few weeks, go visit my Profile Page and vote... but only when you've read this chapter... and reviewed, if you'd be so kind! ;)
(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)
Chapter 9
"I'm sorry, I think my hearing is failing. Did you just say that you and Jess are going on a first date this weekend?" asked Lane, eyes wide with shock.
"Those were pretty much the words I used, yup," said Rory, nodding her head. "You know, I don't actually think your hearing is damaged at all."
She was grinning all over her face when she said it, and Lane found the expression infectious at first. Unfortunately, her joy was short-lived as she gave the situation further consideration.
"Are you sure about this?"
"Lane, of course I'm sure," said Rory definitely. "I'm happy. Aren't you happy for me that I'm happy? I'm happy about your new apartment, even though it means you're living with two messy boys now," she said, looking over at Brian and Zack who were deep into their video games. "No offence, guys," she called to them, just in case they heard - the kitchen and living room were pretty much the same room after all.
"None taken," Brian assured her. "Although my mom says I'm surprisingly neat for a guy."
"Dude, you can so clean up after me, I won't even mind," Zack told him even as he pummelled his friend's character on the TV screen.
Lane shook her head and turned her attention back to Rory.
"If you're happy then you know I'm happy for you," she promised, "but it's just... well, it's Jess. As much as you cared about him, he didn't exactly treat you in the best way the whole time you were dating."
"I know that," Rory agreed, "but things are different now. Very different," she noted with a look. "I can't hold Jess entirely responsible for what happened, not least because he doesn't remember any of it, and even if he did, was I the perfect girlfriend? Of course not. Nobody can be. We both made mistakes."
"As the best friend, I feel obligated to point out that his mistakes were bigger."
"And I love that you're always on my side, Lane, but after everything Jess has been through, I just feel like it's only fair to give him another chance. I want another chance too. I really think we can make it work this time."
Lane nodded that she understood, mostly because she felt she ought to. Actually, she did kind of get it, she just wished she didn't. It was Jess, after all.
"I'll admit, he is nicer since the accident. Friendlier, less hostile," she said thoughtfully, "and I guess he has suffered enough for whatever he did do, losing his memory and everything."
"Exactly," Rory agreed. "Karma has certainly come and bitten him in the butt for anything he did wrong to me. I couldn't have wished this on anyone."
"Me either," said Lane. "So, I guess, have a good first date?" she offered then, holding up her glass of soda.
"Thanks." Rory grinned, clinking her mismatched cup against Lane's own. "I really do think it'll be fun."
The girls talked a little longer until Rory finally said she should go if she wanted to be ready on time. Jess was coming by at seven and then they would decide what they wanted to do on their date. It was tough to make plans. Jess really didn't know what he liked to do or what Rory liked to do for that matter. The plan was then made to not have a plan, to go where the night took them. Of course, Rory still wanted to look good for the occasion and headed home to make that happen.
"Rory."
She turned the corner from Lane's place and ran straight into someone coming the other way. She was suspired to realise who it was.
"Dean, hi," she said, shifting awkwardly. "Um, how are you?"
"I'm fine," he told her, looking equally as uncomfortable if that were possible. "You?"
"Also, fine," she opted for, even if it was a major understatement.
"You're smiling a lot for just fine," he noted, the same expression coming to his own face as if it were infectious.
"Oh, well. Um, I kinda have a date tonight," she admitted then, looking everywhere but at him. "With Jess."
"With Jess?" he echoed, shaking his head. "Wow, that's... I guess I should've seen that coming."
"Why would you say it like that?" she asked, frowning some.
"Like what?"
"As if it's a bad thing, as if... as if I'm doing something wrong."
"Well, you're not doing something smart," he told her snippily. "I'm sorry, Rory, but after what that guy did to you, to us, how can you just... how could you just act like you're the one who forgot?"
"Because I wish I did," she admitted. "All that stuff in the past Dean, that's all it is, the past," she told him earnestly. "You and I had our problems long before Jess showed up, and I'm not denying that he and I had our issues too, but that's our business. He doesn't remember what happened before, and like I told him, I don't want to remember. I want to start over and he wants to be with me. I'm sorry to be harsh but how is any of this even your business?"
She wasn't angry, because there was no need to be. Quite honestly, Rory was just genuinely curious as to why Dean thought he had a right to accuse her of anything, especially now.
"I just... I don't want to see you get hurt again," he said, a hand at her shoulder. "I know it's not the same, not now I'm... now I'm married to Lindsay and everything, but I'm never going to stop caring about you."
Rory shrugged off his hand, and shook her head.
"If you care about me, Dean, then respect my judgment and try to be happy for me, please," she urged him. "That's what I've done with you and Lindsay. Pay me the same courtesy, or just maybe leave me alone, okay?"
She moved past him then and kept on walking, even when Dean called her name behind her. Rory didn't want to be made to feel bad for her decision to be with Jess, and she sure as hell wasn't going to let her ex make her think she was in the wrong. Sometimes she wondered why she ever dated Dean in the first place. Maybe he was different back then. Maybe it was Rory that had changed, she couldn't be sure. All she did know was that she was very much looking forward to seeing Jess tonight and she wasn't about to let anyone else spoil that for her.
"Jess?" Luke called as he came into the apartment.
"Hey," his nephew replied as he emerged from the bathroom still buttoning his shirt. "Everything okay?"
"With me? Sure," said Luke nodding his head. "I was coming to check on you actually. You feeling okay?"
"I'm fine," said Jess, wondering at the question. "There a reason why I wouldn't be?"
"No. No, not really," said Luke, shaking his head. "I was just checking."
"And smiling at me like a loon," his nephew noticed. "Seriously, Uncle Luke, what is going on?"
"I don't know. I guess I just... well, I'm happy for you, and for Rory. You guys getting together, it was what I wanted to happen actually, and then it did and... well, it didn't go so well."
"I'm getting that. Not that Rory really wants to tell me what happened. Pretty sure I screwed it up, but there's not much I can do about that now, especially since I don't even know what it is that I did wrong," said Jess with a sigh.
"You can not screw up this time," Luke suggested. "I don't think Rory's looking for anything else."
"That's what she says too."
"Then it's gotta be true."
Jess didn't answer that, partly because he didn't feel the need to, but equally because he wasn't quite sure he believed it and so couldn't agree. It still bothered him that Rory wouldn't tell him what happened the last time they dated. He didn't want to care. He certainly didn't want to make a fight with Rory just when things were going in a really good direction, but Jess couldn't help it. He hated all the not knowing.
"Jess, talk to me," Luke urged him then, standing in the doorway watching him search for his wallet and fasten his watch onto his wrist.
"Nothing to talk about," said Jess, shrugging his shoulders and keeping his eyes on the task at hand. "Can't talk about something I don't remember."
"You know, you were no saint, but you certainly weren't a monster either," Luke promised him. "I don't want you imagining you did anything really awful. You're not the type to raise a hand to a woman or to take advantage."
"Well, that's something, I guess," said Jess, checking his hair in the mirror a moment.
Afterwards he just stopped and stared, meeting his own eyes. It was tough enough to look at other people and try to figure out who they were, what their motives might be, if they were trustworthy or not. To look at yourself and wonder the same things, it was too weird, but Jess kept on trying. It was all he could do.
"Hey," said Luke, suddenly appearing behind him in the glass. "You're not a bad kid," he promised, his hand on Jess' shoulder. "Sure, when you came here you... well, you had kind of an attitude problem, I'm not gonna deny that, but you had your reasons."
"Reasons that I don't remember," said Jess, his tone caught somewhere between pained and almost grateful. "I don't know if that makes me a better person or just a fake."
He turned around to face Luke then and his uncle realised that was less a statement and more of a question. Jess wanted him to say which was more true, but Luke had no idea what answer to give. He gave it some thought for a few seconds and then finally sighed.
"Jess, you're not... you're just you, only you don't remember certain things," he said, knowing he wasn't helping much but trying all the same. "I remember I heard somewhere that when you raise a kid, half of how they turn out is nature, so their DNA and all of that stuff, and the other half is nurture, how they're raised and everything."
"So?" Jess prompted.
"So, you're the same kid. Jess Mariano, product of Liz and Jimmy, my nephew," he explained, "it's just you don't have the memories or the context to go with it. That makes you a little different, sure, but enough the same that you shouldn't worry about it. I mean, come on, Rory likes you as much now as she did before. You can't be that different, right?"
Jess wasn't sure about that. He still wasn't convinced that Rory would be giving him a second chance if he hadn't had their first go around wiped from his mind. He believed this wasn't all pity on her side, but still. He supposed if he wanted to be with her, he was just going to have to suck it up and move forward.
"Okay," he told Luke then, nodding once. "Thanks."
"No problem," his uncle assured him. "Here, take this," he said then pulling a couple of bills from his back pocket and pressing them into Jess' hand.
"I don't even know if we're going out or where we'll go," he said, shaking his head.
"Even if you stay in, a Gilmore girl needs her food and take out can be expensive."
Jess nodded that he understood and smiled at the same time. "Thanks, Uncle Luke."
"Go on, get out of here," said Luke, shoving his shoulder. "Have a good time."
As Jess went out of the apartment, he raised his hand in goodbye. Luke waited until the door closed behind his nephew before letting out a breath he hardly knew he had been holding. This really was a horrible situation for everyone, but none so much as Jess. Not knowing anything about his life but the bare bones and whatever he had been told these last few weeks, it had to be awful, and Luke just couldn't imagine how he would cope if it happened to him. Still, it was doing Jess no harm not to remember how crappy Liz had proven to be in raising him, or what a mess his own relationship with Rory had become.
"This time should be better," he said to himself, thinking of Lorelai and how even she seemed to believe Jess and Rory could make things work this time around. "It has to be," he added, heading for the door. "Couldn't end much worse."
To Be Continued...
