Chapter 9

I sighed, reaching for my window, twisting myself further into the sheet. Out of habit I covered myself up at night. Out of necessity I tried to rid myself of the covers when I was sleeping, and the result was tangled werewolf. I groaned, yanking the blankets away from my body, stumbling to the bathroom. I reached for the doorknob, when the door was thrust open, leaving me face to face with Jacob.

I remembered why I had felt like shit.

Over a week ago I told him I told him my mother was making me leave. Over a week ago he had screamed in an agony that I could barely comprehend. Over a week ago, he said he could track me by the pattern of my heart beat.

After a week of as little contact with one another as possible I was aching for him. An agreement of trying to ease the blow of our separation; I felt as though my insides had turned to ash. He was right across the hall, I saw him every day, but we didn't touch, didn't speak. I had no idea how I would handle months without him.

"Kris?" His voice was imploring.

I realized I hadn't moved since the door opened. I was still staring stupidly with my hand outstretched.

"Uhh... Jacob." I straightened, putting on my 'strong' facade. I inched past him, trying to get to the bathroom, when he grabbed my arm, making me stand still. "J-Jacob?"

He looked at me without looking, his face twisted and contorted; matching my insides. My false front melted.

"Jacob." I whispered, grabbing onto his upper arm, where the muscle was so thick my hand didn't wrap halfway around and squeezed for dear life, "Jacob, I give up. We can run away, we could... we could..." His eyes were penetrating me again.

"No, we can't." His voice was dead; he had considered everything, knowing him. "Our only option is for you to go home, Kris. Besides what about your siblings?"

I froze, I had forgotten. "My... siblings..."

"Yeah." He whispered, then gathered me into an abrupt hug, "Honey, we can't ever stop. We can't quit."

I pulled away, furious as his words sank in. I punched him, "How dare you say that!? We're killing ourselves!" I reached up, tip toe, to caress his face, "Every touch we deny ourselves, every word we don't say, every time we avoid each other, every time we don't look into one another's eyes, we die! You feel it, I know you do!"

"Maybe, but it is something that we must live through. Eventually we will be able to be together again. I can live for that." His face betrayed his strong words.

I was angry, I wanted to walk away, but I was addicted to his company like a heroin addict to their needle. "And what about now, Jacob? How long, exactly, is 'eventually'?" I poked him in the chest; using every opportunity I could to touch him. It wasn't technically being friendly, and I think he had begun to catch on.

"I think this may be a discussion we need to continue in my room." A smile quirked the sides of his lips.

I shivered in delight.

"I don't think so. I think we can solve this right now, right here. You'd have to take me to your room by force." I planted my feet firmly, crossing my arms over my chest.

He ducked his head to hide his pleased grin, I was still scowling. The best actress, I was. He scooped me into his arms; I began to bite at him, accidentally planting a kiss on his lips.

"You bastard." I whispered, kissing him again; more ferociously, taking his breath. "How dare you make me do something against my will?"

He dropped me on his bed, laughing as I bounced. I kicked him on the fly; he doubled over, somehow landing on top of me. "Lady, I think you listen best when pinned."

"Why not leash me?" I snorted, a bit surprised to figure out just how much the thought turned him on.

"I should torture you to make you listen to me." He panted, licking my ear, his fingers working on the buttons to my shirt.

I smiled, guiding his free hand over my body, letting my free hand play with his chest. His hand broke free of mine and stopped right above the waist of my shorts. My body jolted with the sudden direct contact to such a sensitive spot. We broke away, his hand still hovering so his fingertips were massaging the skin just beneath my waistband. Tingles ran through my body as our eyes met.

"This isn't technically sex, right?" He slid his hand lower.

I couldn't respond as I closed my eyes, wanting- needing this release. I slid my body upwards. His fingertips were now centimeters from the place of all my tension, playing and pulling on the pubic hairs, massaging the skin. His breath was just as heavy as mine. A thousand things were running through my mind, foremost was: should I be pleasing him too?

He sensed my apprehension and pulled away from me. I whimpered, longing for his hand back. He began to sit up from his position above me. Angry I grabbed his shoulders, forcing him back on top of me.

"Jacob, I may be unsure about this, and I may not know what I'm doing... but..." Damned these tears! "But..." I was sobbing; I wanted to make him happy. I wanted to make it so he could never allow me to leave. I hated myself for doing this to him.

He was above me, looking at me with pity. Angry, I crashed my lips to his, splitting our bottom lips in the process, the taste of his saliva mixed with his blood as my tongue roved his mouth, forcing his tongue to react to mine. I grinded my body against him, sure that I had him where he didn't want to leave. I grabbed his hand and began to lead it to my breast, when he pinned it to his mattress. He pulled his mouth from mine, gasping, glaring.

"You want this done? You want it to make a point, prove something?" He was mad at me now. "Then I will be dominating this act."

I was frightened but highly aroused as he grabbed my other hand and placed it on the bulge of his jeans, never taking his mouth from my neck. As he nipped and sucked, he forced my hand to massage his swollen member. He groaned, a shudder coming off his shoulders.

"I have no qualms about this." He whispered in my ear heavily, his breath hot against my cheek.

He grabbed a corner of my shirt with his mouth, still grasping my hands to their relative one and six o'clock positions. His breath was coming heavier and so was the heat that was pooling in my lower abdomen, liquid leaking into my underwear. He yanked his head upward, ripping my shirt open halfway; buttons flying and fabric ripping. He didn't even bother to take my bra off but slid it downwards. He stopped everything at that moment, looking at me, in awe.

"I've never..." He looked at me, as if worshipping me.

I blushed, feeling as though there were none prettier than myself at that moment. I smiled slyly, reaching upward with my legs, wrapping them around his thighs, taking my hand away from his. He snapped out of it, pinning my other hand to the mattress as well. His head dipped as he occupied himself with my breasts, licking and nibbling, sending tingling shockwaves to my thighs, adding to the ferocity of my grinding.

I groaned feeling flushed. I felt him smile as he bit down hard. The pains mingling with the pleasure made me cry out, arching my body even further against his. He groaned. Our sweat mingled together as we came closer and closer to climaxing. He let go my hands, unzipping himself, ripping my shorts off me, chocking back a growl as the scent of the wetness from my maidenhood reached his nose.

I sat up, still in my moderately wet underwear. I began to approach him, forcing him to his knees. I looked into his eyes as I leaned forward to place my mouth around his manhood. I tentatively licked it, gleefully surprised by his shudder. Slowly I placed it in my mouth, sliding my tongue over the head of his swollen member, then the shaft, again and again, faster and faster. Soon his fingers were tightly locked in my hair; he was leaning against the wall, a sweat covering his body. His eyes were closed and he was breathing quicker and quicker. I incorporated sucking into the licking and sliding and soon he was actually the one plunging in and out of my mouth, faster and faster, quicker and quicker.

He leaned over me, his hips still going through the motions, and began rubbing my privates through my underwear with his fingers. Shocked by the sudden spasm of nerves from that area I bit slightly on his member, causing him to hiss and thrust harder into my mouth. His fingers worked faster than my mouth, and soon I was panting just as heavily as he, both of us pulling away from the other, knowing that the only step after this was the one neither of us were willing to yet make.

"Are you okay with this?" His fingers slid down my front now as they dipped into my underwear and began massaging.

I groaned and nodded, I needed him. I wanted him. And that was all that mattered.