Chapter Nine: Too late to apologize

Disclaimer: I own nothing, original characters and ideas belong to Kripke. Lucky fucker.

Previously

Sirius watched from the couch, not knowing why his owner was so upset...but figuring it had something to do with the weird one who could vanish into thin air. A low growl escaped Sirius, causing Sam to look over at the dog. Sirius however was staring behind him, and when he turned around he was face to face with one of his betrayers. "What are you doing here?" Sam all but snarled out, glaring at the other man as he backed away. What the fuck was he doing here?


Now:

"Sam..." "No! You don't get to talk! I don't want to hear it!" "Sam Please!" "No! You ripped my heart out! Just as much as he did Cas!" "And I'm sorry!" "No! You're an emotionless dick! Remember? You don't care what happens to us humans!" "I care what happens to you!" "LIAR!" Castiel recoiled from that like he'd been slapped. "Sam?" "Liar! If you cared you wouldn't have let him leave, let alone helped him!" "You deserve better then him! Sam! I-" "You what? Think you're better then him?" Sam snarled. "I've got news for you Castiel. Being an angel doesn't make you good nor does it make you better then someone! Not to me at least!" Silence stretched between them, both men staring at each other and Sirius sitting on the couch growling lowly.

The silence seemed to stretch for a long time, Castiels bright blue eyes staring into Sams dulled green ones, dull from the tears that threatened to fall, tears he'd helped put there. Castiel stepped closer, and when Sam didn't move away from him he slowly reached out to grab Sams arms, pulling the taller man against him and Sam broke, sobbing into Castiels shoulders while the angel held him upright for his knees buckled. "I'm sorry...so sorry." Castiel whispered while he held the sobbing man, collapsing back against the wall to support the added weight better. This seemed to snap Sam out of his grief and he pulled away, shaking his head. "No." He stepped backwards and turned away from the angel. "No...no.." "Sam..." "No!" "Sam Please!" "Why? You let him leave me so what, you could pick up the pieces?" "Sam-" "No! I don't want to hear your lies!" "It wasn't like that!" Sam wheeled around "Then please enlighten me. What was it like? What possessed you to think it'd be best for Dean to leave me!"

Castiel looked down at the ground before taking a unnecessary breath. "I just know that you were so afraid of him, that you couldn't be in the same room as him because of what h-" "That wasn't Dean!" "I know that Sam. You know that, but your mind and body, they just see Dean...and react to danger. I wish it wasn't that way, but it is!" "Then make me forget!" "I...what?" "Just make me forget...I...I ...Cas please." Sam pleaded, the look in his eyes seemed so broken. Castiel felt as though his heart was being ripped apart piece by piece, from the look in Sams eyes. He took a step forward, towards the taller man. "You know, there's no going back from this." Castiel warned. "I know." Sam whispered, he knew but he couldn't stand being afraid of his brother, his protector. He felt like he couldn't breathe without Dean there, couldn't find the strength to go on. He needed his brother, he knew it and as much as it hurt he was damn sure gonna get him back.

Castiel stepped closer to Sam, backing him against the wall. Their height difference wasn't overly large, and thus with simply leaning up Castiel sealed his mouth to Sams, the latters eyes fluttering closed as he forced himself to relax. Castiel allowed him several minutes, before his tongue ran along Sams bottom lip begging for entrance. Sam hesitantly granted it, moaning when Castiels tongue explored his mouth. He forced himself to remain calm, to breath through his nose and count, in his head. He had to do this, he had to. He tried, he really did but soon his breathing began to pick up and his nerves to twitch, pushing the angel away from him his dulled green eyes shot to the floor. "Sorry." He mumbled softly, and continued to gaze down. Castiel stepped back to him, forcing Sam to look up as he smiled softly and shook his head. "It's fine Samuel. I won't push you. We can take this as slow or fast as you want..promise." Honesty shined in Castiels eyes. Sam knew within his heart that the angel had been watching him, that he hadn't really left. He wouldn't, not if he really loved him like he'd claimed before. Sam smiled shyly, ducking his head slightly. "Thanks...Cas." He was used to Castiel calling him Samuel, some would assume the angel was pissed but Sam knew. He knew it was what Castiel called him as a term of affection, like...De-...no, Like he called him Sammy.

Sam knew it would take him time, possibly a long time to get over his brother. He knew though, that with Castiel there he'd make it. He knew that he'd be okay eventually...right? Of course he didn't think he'd fall in love with Cas right away, he trusted the angel but that was about it...though you'd never know unless you gave it a shot right? But then again some would swear that he was only using the angel, and he supposed they would be right on some degrees. He didn't see the angel having any issues with it. But that didn't always make it right. Sam sighed as he continued to stare downward, finding the floor interesting once again.

"Sam?" Castiel called, concerned at how long his friend had been silent. "Hm?" "You alright?" "...Yea..." Castiel didn't believe him, it was the tone. He left it alone for now though, and instead grasped Sams hand and gently tugged him towards the living room, shooing the dog off the couch and pushing Sam down onto it. Once the younger man was settled onto the couch, but still out of it Cas decided to do something. Straddling Sams lap he settled down onto the younger man, arms draped over either of Sams shoulders and fingers tangled in his hair. "Sam." He whispered softly into the other mans ear, his breath ghosting across Sams ear. When Sam only shivered, and moaned lowly Castiel dropped his lips to Sams neck, placing lingering kisses along the flesh there. Sam shifted then, head tilting to the side and his hands found Castiels hips. For a moment Castiel was afraid he'd be thrown to the ground, before the fingers dug into his hips and pulled him closer.

Castiel smirked against Sams neck, nipping the flesh gently and slowly rocking against him causing Sam to moan and dig his fingers into Castiels sides. "Mm...Yes." Sam gasped when Castiel nipped his adams apple, before moving up and forcing his tongue inside of Sams mouth. One hand drifted downwards, slipping under Sams shirt and pushing it up until he was able to pull it over Sams head and toss it over in some random direction. "Gorgeous" Castiel whispered against Sams flesh. Sams hands shifted, drifting around until they slipped under Castiels trench coat, moving up and slowly pushing it down and off the angels shoulders. "Cas..." Sam gasped, when the angel sank down to his knees between Sams legs, his lips trailing down the youngers chest, nipping and sucking on each nipple before continuing downwards. "Yes?" Castiel asked, smirking as he paused. "You...don't have to." Castiels hands had drifted down to Sams belt, about to undo it. Castiel frowned as he stared at Sam, before smiling sadly at him. "I want to. Do you not want me to?" He asked, cocking his head to the side slightly.

Sam simply closed his eyes tightly, forcing back the regret he was feeling...the feeling that he was betraying his brother. Sucking in a deep breath he gently pushed Castiels head down, hearing the angels low chuckle as he undid Sams jeans, and tugged gently. Sam lifted his ass to assist in removing his jeans and boxers. Sam gasped and thrust up when warm heat surrounded his dick, a hand buried itself into Castiels hair and grasped, pushing Castiels head down as he threw his head back with a low moan. "Fuck." He didn't care if he was hurting the angel, it felt good and he could enjoy it...it didn't remind him of...the shifter. Castieldidn't mind that Sam began thrusting into his mouth, infact he simply relaxed his jaw and throat and let Sam fuck his mouth, humming around the younger man every now and then, enjoying the moans and gasps that came from him. He only got a gasped out 'Cas' and a tightening of the hand in his hair to warn him, before Sam was cumming. He swallowed it all, licking the other man clean before tucking him away and pulling his pants up as far as they would go. Sam smiled down at him, blissful as he slowly tugged Castiel up into his lap. As he went to unbuckle the angels pants Castiel stopped him "It was about you." He whispered against Sams lips, before kissing the other man.

"Well, Wasn't that just touching." Sam jumped up, knocking Castiel to the floor at that voice. His eyes snapping to the figure standing in the doorway with Sirius beside him. "De.." Sam breathed, finding he couldn't remove his eyes from his brothers form. Sam pulled his pants up all the way, doing them up without even looking. He took a step towards Dean then, but his brothers hateful look stopped him in his tracks. "I'm not even gone twenty four hours Sam, and you're letting another man suck you off. So glad to see you can move on so easily." "De I-" "No, I don't want to hear it. I'll deal with you later. You however." Dean snarled, glaring at the angel as he got up off the ground. Sam cringed backwards at Deans tone, wrapping his arms around himself as he suddenly found the floor interesting, flinching when Castiel placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. Dean audibly growled at that and Sam shrugged away from Castiels touch, shuffling off to the side. "Dean leave him out of this!" Castiel demanded, stepping in front of Sam. "Oh! So you think I'd hurt Sam? Really? I'd never hurt him!" "You already did!" Castiel countered. "That wasn't me!" "Oh so it wasn't you who left him, after promising him you'd never leave, because you were too much of a coward to stay and fight for him, earn his trust again?" Castiel shouted, causing Sam to flinch. Dean had nothing to say to that.

"Stop...Please." Sam whispered to Castiel, shifting where he stood. Both men looked at him and Dean scoffed "What? Don't want me to hurt your new fuck?" Dean snarled, stepping closer and Castiel went to block him as he reached out to grab Sams arm. Dean shoved the angel away, after punching him in the stomach and grabbed Sam then, yanking him to him. Sam gasped at the bruising grip on his arm, and shook his head as Castiel went to defend him. Tears were welling in Sams eyes as he tried to pull away from his brother. "De...Stop please!" "Was he good Sam? Was he better then me?" Dean demanded, shaking his brother. "De! Please! You're hurting me!" Sam cried out, jerking away when Dean let go as if burned and his brother fled to the corner. "Sammy...-" "Leave!" Castiel snarled, stepping between them. "You've done enough damage." Dean smirked then "I'll leave, after I kill you." He stepped closer, pulling out the angel blade as he did. Castiel didn't notice, but Sam did.


A/N: Well, there is chapter nine. I'd like to thank SPN Schmuck and WincestftwDestielforever for their reviews. Hope everyone enjoys. Yes I left you with another cliff hanger, but please don't hang me. Next chapter is underway, and will mostly be Deans POV up till his return. Comments/suggestions are welcome and loved. R&R. Reviews are better then Sam/Cas!