"Cimmerian Sunbeams"
Chapter IX
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By morn, Starfire had at last fallen asleep beside Raven just as she had vowed. It wasn't until early afternoon that she actually woke up. The few moments her eyes adjusted to the light were peaceful. Then, it came into recollection exactly what had happened earlier that day. This made the persimmon-haired beauty sit up suddenly. Her heart pounded beneath her chest. Immediately, she examined Raven intently to assure that the darker girl was breathing—and she was. Hesitantly, Starfire reached out and trailed her finger alongside Raven's face. Raven twitched, but did not wake. A large weight was lifted from Starfire's chest as she saw that her friend was indeed all right. She smiled and climbed out of bed, careful not to wake the sleeping beauty.
Starfire glanced at the clock. It read 1:30 p.m. That meant she got at least seven hours of sleep. She remembered falling asleep just as the sun was beginning to rise. The others were all awake as well, and worried about Raven. Starfire walked into the main room, to see Robin typing at his computer while Cyborg and Beast Boy absentmindedly watched a program on TV. Robin was the first to notice Starfire's presence.
"Star." he stood, walking towards her. "Is Raven all right?"
The ginger-haired damsel smiled and nodded. "Raven will be just fine."
Cyborg and Beast Boy stood, and joined the others. "What happened last night?" Beast Boy asked. "I don't get it …"
Starfire sighed. "I am unsure of how to explain it to you," she replied. "Raven cannot entirely control her powers. Last night, she lost what control she had. That is the greatest I can elucidate." She tried to keep a cheerful tone in her voice, but her words remained laced with gloom despite this.
Robin put his hand on her shoulder. "I know you must feel completely exhausted after last night. We all appreciate everything you did for Raven. You probably saved her life, Star. By all means, you should take the day off today. Don't even worry about it. We got a call a little while ago about Johnny Rancid but it's a minor threat. We can take it without you guys. You really should stay here with Raven."
"But Robin, are you sure you can—"
"Trust me, Star. I'm sure."
Starfire nodded in compliance. Robin nodded towards the others and they took off for the door. Feeling slightly relieved, Starfire returned to Raven's bedroom to see that the pale-skinned girl was just waking up. This brought a faint smile to her lips.
"Raven," she said, softly. "How are you feeling?"
Raven, somewhat startled by her friend's sudden entrance, replied in a calm voice. "My head is pounding."
"Perhaps you need some medicine," Starfire replied quickly, about to retrieve some from the kitchen.
"Star, don't," the other said, before Starfire could go. "I'll be fine. Medicine would conflict with the aftershock." She paused for a few moments, and seemed to enter a daze. She added blankly, "it isn't over."
Concerned, Starfire took a seat beside Raven on the bed. "W-what do you mean?"
"This is far from over," Raven confirmed. As if just realizing what she said, she changed the track of subject, standing. "Starfire, you saved me last night. I don't have full consciousness of recollection, but I know the general essence of it all. Your powers must be drained. How are you feeling?"
"I feel completely well," she replied quickly, in an attempt to disregard Raven's concern. Instead, she focused on the more serious matter. "What do you mean when you say that this is not over? I am concerned for you, friend Raven, and I will do whatever it takes to end this once and for all."
"It can't be helped."
"Do not speak such words. It very well can be helped."
A pause.
"I have to meditate," Raven said at last, leaving the room and quickly hurrying to the roof.
Starfire stood, about to follow her, but then decided against it. "Friend Raven needs time…" she said aloud to herself. Sighing, she returned to the kitchen at a loss for what to do next.
To pass the time until Raven's return, Starfire decided to make a kettle of herbal tea—Raven's favorite. When the water reached boil, Raven still had not returned. Starfire poured herself a small cup of it and added a single tea bag. She'd heard that this kind of tea helped calm nerves. That was perhaps what she needed most right now. Blankly, she bobbed the teabag in and out of the water as a dark green color dispersed throughout the cup. After a few sips, her mind was anything but calm. The way Raven said such things greatly worried the Tamaranian princess.
This is far from over.
It can't be helped.
She itched to ask Raven about it. She had so many questions, such few answers. She knew, however, it wouldn't be wise to ask about it if Raven still wasn't ready to open up. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt her-- what exactly was Raven to her? This thought set her mind on a completely different track. Was Raven still her friend? Was she to simply disregard the affection that had taken place so freshly in the past?
Starfire was not one familiar with the ways of a girl like Raven. Like Starfire, Raven was an alien from another planet. Perhaps a kiss could mean something simple, like a mark of friendship. On Tamaran, a kiss may not have meant anything but Starfire learned that a kiss meant something very passionate, often meaning so much more than friendship, on planet Earth. She felt warmth immediately spread throughout her body and she knew it wasn't the tea. So confused, she closed her eyes and tried to clear her thoughts. It was true, she wanted Raven to mean something more. Starfire cared for Robin, and for Beast Boy—Cyborg as well. But the way Raven made her feel wasn't anywhere in comparison to her other friends.
Interrupted from her thoughts by a creaking in the stairs, Starfire was soon brought back to reality, and saw Raven standing in the doorway. She felt herself engulfed in a rosy blush, worried that Raven could see right through her, right into her thoughts. She did, after all, have telepathy. This feeling of embarrassment was followed by guilt and shame. How could she think of something so unimportant at such a serious moment? Raven—the girl who meant more to her than anybody else in her life—nearly lost her life the previous night.
"Herbal tea?" Raven asked, walking to Starfire. "I didn't know you were into it."
"Oh! I made it for you, Raven," she explained, pushing her recent thoughts as far back into her mind as they would go. "And I tried some myself, I hope that is not of inconvenience!"
"Of course not," the dark girl responded in her usual monotone. She took an empty cup from the cupboard and fixed herself a cup. She sat beside Starfire and began to drink. Waiting a few moments, she finally spoke. "Listen, about last night," she paused once again and took a sip of tea. "Things happened that are far out of our control." She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She continued speaking, taking a different turn. "Starfire, you saved my life. You… you put your life on the line for me." The two girls shared unbreakable eye contact. "Nobody has ever done that before. Not for me." Her voice hardened. "What a foolish thing to do."
Not knowing what to say, Starfire merely fixed her eyes on Raven's amethyst gaze and waited for her to continue.
"But a foolish thing that I will be eternally grateful for," she said, her voice softer. "That power… it's far beyond what we can manage. I don't know how you did what you did last night—this morning, whatever. But Starfire, listen to me when I say this, however you did it… you can't ever do that again."
Starfire looked puzzled. "But Raven, if your life were to be put in danger again—"
"Then let it be so!" she retorted. "Something is after me," she continued darkly. "No matter how hard I try to evade this, it is inevitable."
Her voice was convinced. The look in Raven's eyes were so sure, so unchanging. "Raven… there is something you are not telling me."
"Starfire, do you love me?" Raven asked, her voice strong with confidence yet interlaced with fear.
The lavender-haired girl's choice of words were certainly striking. Starfire blinked and felt a heavy pressure on her chest. Choosing her words carefully, her voice couldn't help but tremble. "Yes, Raven. I do."
"If what you say is true… then you will respect my decision to leave this matter alone. These affairs cannot be interfered with by outsiders." She stood up, and left the room.
Starfire's stomach fell and her entire body went numb with unhappiness.
Like a knife through the heart.
tbc.
