A/N: Yep, new chapter here guys XD This one's been hanging around my head for a while now, so I hope it turned out as good as I imagined.

Special thanks to nievelion for beta-ing this chapter! On to the fic!


"No, you don't belong in the Jade Palace. You're a disgrace to kung fu and if you have any respect for who we are and what we do, you will be gone by morning."

Tigress cringed in her seat as she heard the all too familiar words, with her own ears this time, the vitriol and contempt captured perfectly in the moment.

"Furthermore, you are overweight, out of shape and a waste of perfectly good air."

The feline sighed deeply as she heard the words again, the memory stinging clear as – wait, what?

She did not remember ever saying those words out loud. Sure, she certainly thought them once or twice when she thought of Po as nothing more than a freeloading kung-fu wannabe, but she had never shared her sentiments with anyone else!

She felt her organs calcify as the verbal abuse continued. A few rows behind her, the audience began to titter and chatter in hushed volumes, obviously struck by the cruel words coming from...well, her.

Or at least it was supposed to be her. The actress on stage did bear a striking resemblance to herself, capturing most of her mannerisms and speech patterns nigh flawlessly, completing the illusion. While the audience obviously enjoyed it, the uncanny similarity just made it so it was like she was looking into a mirror and watching herself be all judgmental and cold.

"Not only that, you stole the love of my master, Shifu...."

The female tiger could feel her ears start ringing. The verbal lashing had gone on for a good while now, almost a full ten minutes longer than the original four to five seconds.

She began to stand up from her seat. "I didn't say that!"

"Shhh!" came the whisper from the audience, obviously enthralled at the spectacle as the actor playing Po wept openly by a rather accurate replica of the Sacred Peach Tree.

Before she could protest further, she felt a small tug at her tail, forcing her to sit back down. She turned her head to face Po, who, judging from his nonplussed expression, obviously did not appreciate being depicted as a blubbering cry baby.

"Don't worry about it. The set does look nice doesn't it?" said the panda, his ever jovial personality shining through his annoyance.

Tigress only gave a small nod and crossed her arms as she continued to watch the play. She had to admit that the panda had a point; the picturesque landscape of the mountains surrounding the Jade Palace had been faithfully reproduced, giving the stage an almost dream-like environment.

"I didn't say any of that. You know that, right?" she tried again, and almost immediately regretted it.

Of course he knew. He was there when it happened – the 'chewee' in the chewing out, her being the 'chewer'.

Po just gave a small nod, continuing to munch on his bag of lightly seasoned crispy wonton skins.

The latest adventure of the Furious Five had been the talk of China a few months ago when it happened. Not to mention, the newly minted Dragon Warrior going against all odds and proving himself in the face of one the greatest battles ever recorded in recent history. For a time, scholars and scribes, bards and poets made their way to the Valley of Peace, eager to break bread with the famous warriors they had heard so much about.

More than once, an aspiring poet eager to build his reputation would travel to the Jade Palace and ask them all sorts of questions. While she had never gotten used to the attention and praise lavished upon her and her comrades for their adventures, on which they performed good deeds along the way, she had developed a rather thick hide for the various inaccurate re-tellings of said exploits.

More than once, she would hear some outlandish rumour regarding her and/or her comrades, surprised that some people actually bought into them as fact. While some actual truths occasionally made it through the strainers (the fact that red was her favourite colour, that Crane enjoyed calligraphy and fishing in his spare time, that Monkey had accumulated the most number of injuries along the years, among other things), most of the lot pushed the limits of sense (that she and Master Shifu, or Crane, or Monkey, or Mantis, or even Viper were romantically involved – speaking of which, why was her love life always the focus of such attention anyway?).

Because of this, whenever poets, bards or anyone involved in the literary arts approached them, the Furious Five would take their time regarding the details – not out of fear of being portrayed unflatteringly, but more for the sake of the people who would readily accept whatever they heard, embellishments (lies) or otherwise.

She cursed under her breath as the play continued, this time showing a sparring sequence between herself and Po that never happened in real life – Master Shifu, despite his opinion of the panda at the time, explicitly forbade her to assault him in anyway, likely fearing that she might have very well killed him.

Crossing her arms again, she remembered hearing from Mr. Ping that the day after Po had firmly established his prowess as a warrior, a famous scribe had come to the Jade Palace eager to talk to the five most famous heroes in China. Unfortunately, it happened that each and every occupant of the Palace that was directly involved with the battle spent some much needed time recuperating from the incident – she herself found her every joint and muscle aching that morning, and consequently spent most of the day resting in her room.

The scribe, who she later found was rather famous for working with a popular acting troupe, left – unable to talk to them, but apparently not disappointed.

It would seem that he had gotten all he needed from the servants around the Palace and the residents of the Valley of Peace.

When news of a recently released play reached the Valley, it didn't trouble her in the slightest. After all, she had watched more than her fair share of theatrical productions about her and her comrades. She had gotten used to watching the presentations with a bemused eye, never batting an eyelash whenever a fact had been added or glossed over.

Sure, in her youth, she would blush and fidget and stare at the ground when she attended the shows – she and the others were always made to attend such events when possible, as the productions were made in their honour, after all.

As time went by however, she had gotten used to it; they all had.

What difference did it make if they believed she could jump a hundred feet in the air straight up? Or that Mantis was completely indestructible? Or that Crane could fly and touch the moon?

"Tai Lung is a monster a demon from the depths of hell itself! A look from his eyes could suck out your soul and render you helpless; what chance do you think you have against him?"

The voice of her counterpart again brought Tigress back from her musings. A ripple of gasps and murmurs went through the audience.

"Hmmm, they really took liberties with this, didn't they?" whispered a soft dulcet voice from the feline's other side, sounding somewhere between amused and exasperated.

Tigress gave Viper a small smile – the serpent was in fact present during the actual conversation that was currently being portrayed onstage.

Of course, she remembered as well; Tigress, unknowingly or not, had revealed quite a bit more to the snow leopard; that he was more than the heartless beast people believed him to be. In that conversation with the panda, she had shared that he was in fact capable of love once – and capable of being loved.

It was another fact that had escaped the public – something that would not change tonight.

After all, what did people care if he was a local hero once, much like her and her comrades whom they had now invited and welcomed like gods to watch the play in their quaint village?

What did it matter to them that he had once craved his Master's love and affection, like she still did?

"I have come for the scroll, Shifu! Now ultimate power will be mine and I will be free to take over this miserable country!"

The realization hit her like a boulder to the stomach – she had gotten used to the plays and poems and stories and songs about her because, quite frankly, no one had anything bad to say about the Furious Five, 'the greatest heroes in all of China'.

She felt the guilt start to eat away at her, as she knew that some part of her, no matter how deep she tried to bury it, enjoyed and even craved the love and attention from the people – something she never got from Master Shifu, up until recently anyway.

And now, this play in particular was getting to her unlike any other because for the first time, she wasn't the hero like she usually was.

She was being portrayed, not accurately, but essentially as what she had been – an ignorant fool.

And as strange as it sounded, she now also felt bad for the snow leopard, his admittedly less than stellar image getting worse as time went on. The good he did, the feats he accomplished were fading into obscurity and eventually into rumour.

As she watched her counterpart and Po's kiss passionately after Tai Lung's defeat (she hadn't managed to suppress a groan and a roll of her eyes), she decided she would have a nice, long talk with the proprietors of this play when the opportunity presented itself.

As the curtains closed, the audience rose into raucous applause, whistling and shrieking first towards the stage, then turning to clap at The Furious Five and Dragon Warrior seated at their special box just a few feet from the stage.

Tigress stood up, feeling oddly emotional about the whole thing – why did they applaud her, when they all knew now how heartless she was towards Po?

"Thank you, ladies and gentlemen!" boomed a voice from the stage. A small turtle grinned at the audience from his place on the wooden platform, an ornate walking stick in one hand and an exquisite silk cloak draped around his shoulders.

"Let's hear it for the Seven Little Fortunes!" he continued with a flourish as the members of the acting troupe filed out on the stage – each still looking very much like their real life counterparts.

With a twirl of his walking stick, he gestured towards the guests of honour.

"And let's hear it for our special guests, the Furious Five...."

The audience cheered as the five masters bowed politely towards them as well.

"....and the Dragon Warrior!" the turtle boomed, waving his walking stick towards the panda with a flourish.

The theatre erupted with cheers and claps as Po waved meekly at the audience. He received a slight elbow nudge from Tigress, who looked meaningfully at him, her fist against an open palm and held across her chest. The bear took the cue and, as if rehearsed, all six kung-fu warriors bowed to their audience, which elicited an even higher pitch of cheering and whistling.


A few dozen tents and make-shift campsites littered the small field behind the stage, illuminating the bright green grass with the yellow glow of paper lanterns and campfires.

An atmosphere of exhausted but satisfied cheer was present in the air, as various crew members and employees went about their business, a few congratulatory hand-shakes and pats on the back exchanged every so often. Several workers dragged a massive replica of the Sacred Peach Tree made of hardened paper and colorful strips of cloth to emulate the effects of nature on the leaves of real tree. A few others hauled pieces of the stage back into the waiting wagons, to be assembled at the next performance site.

"Man, that was pretty darned good!" said Mantis, eyes flitting excitedly across the scene. He was quite eager to meet the actor who had portrayed him; it was astonishing how accurately he was portrayed, if he did say so himself. Monkey and Po both nodded in approval and followed as Mantis began to explore and mingle with some of the minor cast and crewmembers

Tigress gave a small grunt of approval, a few seconds too late as Mantis disappeared from view, still obviously disconcerted at the way the play presented her, her powerful arms crossed and her face stony. Viper seemed to notice this and slithered closer to give her feline friend a reassuring pat on the shoulder.

"Don't worry about it; these things aren't known for being that accurate."

The female tiger uncrossed her arms and her face took on a softer expression. Her hands hung loosely by her sides and it looked to take most of her willpower not to clench them.

"I-I'm not. It's just....gods, I feel like such a hypocrite." she admitted, more to herself than anyone.

"Huh? Why?" said the serpent, genuinely curious. If there was a word to describe Tigress, it was 'honest' – she was much harder on herself than anyone else and stood by her beliefs firmly, almost to a fault.

"I'm not supposed to care...."she whispered softly, her eyes downcast.

"What do you mean?"

"It's not supposed to matter what other people think....I mean, I do care about them, but it's not supposed to get to me like this...."

Viper gave a nod of understanding, not really knowing what to say about the situation.

"And you know what's worse? I was completely fine with it when they were singing praises about me....but now..." continued Tigress, her shoulders slumping.

"Well, I, for one, don't believe that." said Crane, who had remained silent up until that moment. He had noticed how the portrayal had affected Tigress as well and now felt it necessary to offer his thoughts on the matter.

"You're not a hypocrite, Tigress. You're not perfect either – no one is. You just reacted the way anyone would and that's nothing to be ashamed of. In fact, were proud of you for taking it as well as you did; anyone else would've probably walked out of there much sooner.

"So what if you care about how people think of you every now and then? It just makes you human – just the fact that you're beating yourself so hard over it already puts you a step above most people.

Tigress gave a small smile at the waterfowl's words. Viper looked quite impressed at her feathered comrade's words and turned towards the campsite.

"Come on, I wanna go meet some of the performers! I never thought I'd ever get to see the Seven Little Fortunes perform so up close!" giggled the snake as she and her companions made their way to some of the tents.

"Are they that famous? I've never heard of them before..." said Tigress, her interest now piqued as the burden was lifted off her shoulders.

"Well, six of them already performed for a long time until they got their seventh member." said Crane, reading from the small scroll that contained information on the acting troupe.

"Yeah, the guy that played Tai Lung, right?" said Viper who slithered by the bird's side.

The avian master gave a nod, his gaze never leaving the scroll. "I think we're going to have to split up, girls."

Tigress nodded in approval; a few crewmembers and stage hands had begun to follow them and started to chatter excitedly, which could no doubt lead into frenzy.

Splitting up the crowd into more manageable pieces was a battle technique she and the others employed on barbarian hordes and it worked just as well for screaming fans.

They took off in three directions, Crane flying overhead and Viper facing the crowd to stall them. Tigress quickly ducked into a tent, keeping as silent as possible, and listened for the excited voices of the people from inside the flap.

She breathed a sigh of relief as the noise began to fade away – Viper was, as usual, excellent at crowd control.

"Sweet mother of the Jade Emperor, Master Tigress?!" an astonished voice said from behind the feline, hushed in awe.

Tigress turned to face the owner of the voice and found herself looking at a near exact mirror image of herself, albeit much giddier and seemed to have a smile frozen on its face. She wore nearly the exact same clothing as hers, the red silk vest and black trousers matching perfectly. Her build was slightly less robust than a kung-fu warrior, but still belied lithe agility, obviously required to be able to perform the impressively choreographed fight scenes on stage night after night.

"The Master Tigress! Oh my gods! It's really you!" the mirror image continued to chatter excitedly, wringing her hands about, looking unsure about what to do with them. After a few moments, she mimicked a signature bow from kung-fu practitioners, before quickly rising and grabbing Tigress's own hands.

"Master Tigress, this is such an honor! My name is Wei Ming and it's been an honor to play you!" she said happily, her initial excitement having been tempered, though only slightly.

"Er, thank you, Ming—was it? Really, you were very good." said Tigress genuinely. She meant it and had been most impressed with her stage counterpart's performance. The fact of the matter was, had Ming's portrayal of her been any less accurate, she doubted that the factual inconsistencies would've bothered her as much.

Ming ducked her head slightly, blushing quite a bit. She let go of Tigress' hands as she rubbed the back of her neck sheepishly. "Thank you. That really means a lot, especially from you."

She gave Tigress another bright grin. "Hey let me go take my make-up off and we can talk, okay? I'll be real quick!"

The female kung-fu master smiled and gave a nod, amused at Ming's excited behaviour as the other tiger took off in a hurry. She seemed like a nice girl and much like herself, was passionate about her craft. It must have taken years of training to be able to mimic another person like that – on stage, there were no traces of the actress' apparent bubbly personality. Tigress had heard that some theatre performers could literally become other people when they were performing and while she herself had done a fair bit of acting when the situation called for it (such as infiltrating a camp of mercenaries), she was certain she could never do it in Ming's, or any of the Seven Little Fortunes' calibre, for that matter.

The inside of the tent was simple but held a comforting sort of warmth. A small barrel, likely used to contain rice or ale had been made as a makeshift dresser, complete with a framed mirror. A kit of stage make-up was placed on top of it, a few scratches and dents on the red painted surface appearing as small patches of light brown.

"Hey, uh, Miss Ming? Are you in there?" called a nervous voice from outside the tent, breaking through Tigress' silent observation.

Before she could answer, a feline head poked inside the tent. A pair of almost-but-not-entirely familiar golden orbs stared at her with a mix of surprise and bewilderment.

"Sorry for the intrusion Miss Ming, but I just thought you'd like to know that the Furious Five are here. I-I...er, thought you'd like to meet them...."

Tigress said nothing and took this time to observe the intruder.

So, this was the actor who played Tai Lung. He was undoubtedly of the same species as the real thing, albeit with a different pattern of rosette spots on his pelt. The heavy set brow was absent, giving him a more youthful appearance and the moustache, which had been present on-stage, was nowhere to be found. His build was slightly less bulky but was still quite muscular – he would have been intimidating if it weren't for the way he held himself, slightly hunched over and with his hands clasped nervously behind his back. His voice held none of the menace and aged timbre as the real Tai Lung did; instead, it still cracked a bit with nervousness, belying his youth. He was still wearing the trademark purple trousers and intimidating iron studded leather belt, but managed to still appear less than threatening.

Tigress again was impressed at the chameleonic abilities of the acting troupe – they clearly deserved the fame they had garnered from across the country.

"I-I'm sorry again for the intrusion...Miss Mi—er, I mean, Ming. I just thought you'd be, you know, interested...." he continued again, shuffling nervously. He looked to be deep in contemplation for a few moments, before suddenly gaining a determined expression on his face and nodding to himself.

Quicker than it seemed possible because of his bulk, he closed the gap between himself and Tigress. In a swift motion, he put a large paw around her lower back and made to dip her low into the ground, obviously intended as a romantic gesture.

Unfortunately, this set off all but any feelings of romance within Tigress. Faster than she herself could think, she used the momentum generated by the dip to grab his arm and with a pivot of her leg, flipped the much larger feline on his back with a resounding slam.

"Whoa...." he groaned groggily from the ground, his pupils unfocused. "When Miss Ming puts herself into a role, she really puts herself into it!"

Tigress felt her stomach drop. What had she just done? This guy was just an actor – a simple-minded but otherwise good-hearted fellow. She quickly knelt beside him and held up two fingers.

"I'm sorry! Are you alright? How many fingers do you see?"

"Miss Ming looks really pretty with the stage make-up on – why hasn't she removed it yet? I know Miss Ming doesn't really like to wear make-up off-stage but this foolish one thinks it makes her even prettier than she already is..." he slurred from the ground, still quite dizzy.

Tigress gave a small grin at the snow leopard's behaviour – he really was laying on the honorifics and politeness, probably still wondering what he had done wrong.

"Hey Master Tigress, I'm back and—what the....what happened?" said Ming as she entered from the back of the tent, dressed in a light pink cheongsam. The striped markings on her face looked quite different now, having removed the artificially applied ones that were required for her role.

"I'm sorry, he came in here and tried to—well, I reacted and..." explained Tigress, still kneeling beside the fallen actor.

"Oh for crying out loud..." Ming muttered as she knelt beside her fellow performer as well. "Shun? Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine Miss Mi—why is there two of you? I must have taken quite a fall...." he said, sitting up with some help from both females.

"Honestly, trying something with Master Tigress? Have you gotten tired of me so quickly?" said Ming in mock anger, though she kept a mischievous smile fixed on her face.

Shun's jaw hung open for a few moments, looking at the two female tigers, both looking amused at his plight, before kneeling in apology before Ming, bowing until his forehead touched the ground.

"This unworthy one apologizes, Miss Ming! I thought the great Master Tigress was you and...well, you always said this unworthy one should be more spontaneous and I....I am sorry!"

Turning towards Tigress, he took another low bow, shaking with fright.

"I apologize Master Tigress! For, well......for that."

Ming sighed before gently placing her hands on the cowering snow-leopard's shoulders and standing him up.

"Master Tigress, this is my fiancé, Tao Shun. He's the newest member of our troupe." said Ming brightly, patting the snow leopard on the shoulder.

"Pleased to meet you, Master Tigress. Again, I am sorry for before." he said, shaking Tigress' hand lightly.

"No worries. I'm sorry too – I should've said something. I can't say I blame you for the misconception. Ming here is really quite convincing." Tigress replied casually, finding it difficult to stay mad at the poor boy.


The two performers and the warrior chatted for a while until Ming brought out a small wooden table and began to fix tea for the three of them.

"Shun darling? Would you go get us some rice dumplings?" Ming asked sweetly.

"Yes, of course, Miss Ming!" Shun replied brightly, hurrying off.

"Don't call me that!" she yelled after him, as his tail gradually disappeared from the tent flap. "Honestly, you'd think he's start calling me more casually after dating for one year...."

"He seems like a nice boy. Very polite." Tigress mused.

"Yeah, it's not like it's a bad thing – I mean, I certainly prefer it over the kind of shit other men pull around me. It just gets a bit much at times; it feels like I have a manservant instead of a boyfriend."

Tigress gave a tiny smile at the astute observation from Ming. Despite the rather fearsome reputation of snow leopards, fanned even further by the crimes of Tai Lung, the few she did meet along her travels were really very nice people. She was surprised to learn that very few of them were warriors – they preferred to keep to themselves, most of them living in remote farming villages far from the cities and lived a simple way of life. They apparently believed that fighting would only lead to unwanted trouble.

"I don't mean to pry, Ming, but how'd Shun end up with your troupe?" Tigress asked, sipping a bit of tea from her cup.

"Oh, that. Well, back when I was young, Peng – he's our writer and director, the turtle from the show – took me and a few others to perform some free shows in the mountains. He does that, you know; he says it helps to gain a fan-base everywhere.

"Anyways, Shun's village was in one of those mountains and he saw us perform. He said he wanted to be an actor ever since. Also...."

Ming trailed off as her face began to turn red again. "...he, um, wanted to get closer to me. He followed the troupe around, where ever we were performing. He finally introduced himself to us one day and we hired him as a stage hand."

Tigress nodded in understanding, repressing a slight urge to sigh dreamily. It was actually quite romantic when one thought about it, although Shun apparently had some stalker-like tendencies.

"He was real good as a stage hand, if a bit clumsy at times. He was always there when we needed him and never asked for higher wages or anything. He just asked us to train him how to be an actor.

"We took turns training him. Yang—he played Master Monkey—trained him in taolu and I trained him in singing. He learned really fast and when Peng started writing this new play about you guys, well, we felt like he was ready to take on his first real role."

Tigress gave a smile as she finished her cup of tea, being reminded of her intention of speaking with the writer. She decided to bring it up later when the opportunity presented itself.

"Sounds like he has a bright future ahead of him."

"Yeah, that he does." agreed Ming, sighing wistfully.

"When did you first realize you had feelings for him, if you don't mind my asking?" Tigress inquired.

The actress gave a small giggle as she twiddled her thumbs nervously. "Oh, a few months after we began training him to perform. It took a little while longer for me to admit it – I realized I had to take him before somebody else did. I mean, well – just look at him."

The female kung fu master found herself agreeing; despite his awkward movements and nervous speech, Shun was really quite handsome.

"What does he think about portraying Tai Lung?" Tigress asked. It had been a nagging question in the back of her mind for quite some time.

"He doesn't really mind. At the end of the day, he says, we're really just here to entertain people. It's kinda up to them if they wanna take what we show them at face value or if they wanna dig deeper. We're just here to make sure everybody has a good time."

"That we did." said Tigress, finding a whole new respect for the theatre."Thank you very much for the wonderful performance."

"It was our pleasure, Master Tigress." said Ming pleasantly, raising her cup to the other female tiger. She cleared her throat after a sip, looking a bit nervous about something.

"Er, by the way, you're not too upset about the...'artistic license' we took with the play right? I mean, I know you don't have a thing for the Dragon Warrior, but Peng says that a romantic side story would help draw in more crowds."

Tigress shrugged, suddenly feeling a little self-conscious. "No, no, I'm fine with it. Hey, as long as people don't take them too seriously right? And, maybe you could let them know early on that you're not necessarily showing all the events as they actually happened."

"Will do. I'll get them to put that on a poster or something."

A soft rustle of fabric alerted the two female tigers the return of Shun who was carrying a small tray of rice dumplings and honey crackers.

"Sorry it took so long, Miss Ming, Master Tigress." he said, kneeling down to set the tray of food on the table.

Ming gave Tigress a meaningful glance as if to say 'utterly hopeless'. She quietly sidled over to the still fussing snow leopard and proceeded to deliver a searing kiss that lasted for quite a while.

She finally freed her lips from his after a few moments. "Don't call me that."

"Yes darling."


"Can you believe those guys?! I mean, how hard is it to find a mantis around these parts?" grumbled Mantis when Tigress was reunited with her comrades. It had grown darker as night fell completely over the camp, but the full moon hung over the field like giant lantern, bathing everything in a bluish glow. A few crowds gathered around the pot of stew simmering away on a fire, eager to start dinner.

"What's wrong with you?" Tigress asked the fuming insect.

"He's just mad he was played by a prop on stage." said Viper from beside insect, who was still grumbling expletives under his breath. "One of the Seven Little Fortunes? Yeah, that's him over there."

Tigress turned her gaze towards where Viper was pointing her tail to see a jolly looking rhinoceros sharing a drink with some of the crew members. He was laughing merrily at a shared joke between himself and the other crew members, his deep, resonating chuckle echoing in the distance.

Tigress raised an eyebrow, a tad confused. "That's him?"

"Yep. He was the one moving the stick with the Mantis shaped cut-out attached to it and doing the voice." said the serpent, a wicked smile on her face.

The insect shot her a dirty glare and smiled sadistically. "At least they got my gender right!"

The female serpent's head turned an interesting shade of purple as she hissed at Mantis. "I'll have you know that Yao Zu is a very accomplished character actor!"

"Yeah, with a wife, three kids and one grandkid on the way!" Mantis guffawed, earning another death glare from Viper.

Tigress chuckled at her friends' antics and turned to regard Crane.

"What about you? Anything interesting happen?"

"Oh, our boy's got game!" Mantis interjected, deciding to turn his sights on the avian master. "He just earned himself a new fan!"

Tigress raised a quizzical brow at the bird who seemed to be trying to hide in his own feathers.

"I, er, met the actress who played me...."

Tigress gave a snort. "Actress?" She had briefly wondered why the performer playing Crane in the play wore a shirt. Also, while the 'Crane' on stage was just as graceful and soft spoken as her avian friend, there was something she couldn't put her finger on.

"Yes, well, she seemed to know me quite well, so they thought she could do a good job playing me." he said awkwardly. "She's apparently been interested in the role for quite some time."

Mantis continued to chuckle from the sidelines. "Dude, how freaky is it that 'stage-you' has a thing for the real you?"

Crane made an odd choking sound, flapping his wings wildly. "Will you be quiet?! She's ten years younger than me! If Mei Ling hears about this...."

"Where are Po and Monkey?" Tigress wondered aloud, less to let the others know her thoughts and more to stop the insect from further harassing Crane.

"Right over there." Viper pointed, a new wave of giggles coming from her. Turning towards the direction of her tail, Tigress was treated to the surreal sight of two Dragon Warriors, one looking very, very annoyed and the other looking quite calm.

"Okay, buddy, let's do this again. What's your name?" the Annoyed One asked the Calm One.

"I told you, my name is Po. I was but the son of a humble noodle maker until destiny called upon me to bestow its mission." replied the Calm One gently, his voice nearly identical to the currently fuming Annoyed One.

"No, I am but the son of a humble noodle maker until destiny called, blah blah blah!"

Tigress continued to watch open mouthed as the two bears continued to talk, the Annoyed One growing increasingly more irritated.

"That's Yuen Biao. He's a method actor." Viper explained, gesturing towards the Calm One. "They say he never breaks character during the entire tour. Ever."

A small laugh escaped from Tigress' mouth before she could stop it. She hadn't even thought it was possible to get Po that mad.

"They've been at it for hours." deadpanned Crane.

The leader of the Five gave a small nod and started to look for a familiar simian master with her eyes.

"Anyone seen where Monkey is?" she asked.

"Over there." pointed Crane with a wing where two nearly identical langurs seemed to be having a heated conversation.

As Tigress strained her ears, she could make out bits and pieces from the two simians.

"You. Were. Very. Good!" said Monkey, making sure to enunciate each word slowly and carefully.

His counterpart nodded excitedly and cleared his throat. "Very...good!" he said in a very thick Mandarin accent.

Monkey groaned. "Do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth?!"

The other simian simply gave a grin and thumbs up. Monkey fought the urge to slap a palm over his face and awkwardly returned the thumbs up before turning to leave.

His counterpart tried one last time to make conversation. "I....do...my....own stunts!" he yelled at Monkey's retreating form.

"Yeah, who does your acting?" Monkey muttered tersely even as he smiled and waved back. He trudged back to join his group, along with Po who looked as mentally exhausted as the simian did.

"My accent is not that bad, is it?" he asked his teammates.

"No, of course not!"

"Why would you even think that?"

"Naw, man...."

"I think your accent's awesome!"

"Never. Mind." Monkey growled as the Furious Five bade their goodbyes to the crewmembers and the Seven Little Fortunes who all gathered together to say their goodbyes. Each member of the presentation, including the turtle Peng began clapping wildly until the entire campsite erupted into a loud cheer.

Tigress smiled at Ming and Shun who waved back at her, their hands intertwined.

The female kung fu master slowly raised her hands to quiet the excited crowd.

"Thank you all for a wonderful show. Good luck on your coming performances." she said. She looked meaningfully at her teammates and put her fist against her open palm. She looked sideways at Po who imitated her, then turned at Crane who held the pose as well. Almost as if rehearsed, they all took a bow amidst the applause.

END


A/N: For those who don't know, the Seven Little Fortunes was the name of the performance troupe that Jackie Chan was part of, consisting of the best students of the China Drama Academy; Sammo Hung and Yuen Biao (the namesake of the actor who played Po in the story) were members as well. As such, they usually appeared in each other's movies – I recommend seeing them even if you're not a big kung-fu fan since the humour is pretty damned sharp as well. My favourite movies where all three appear are Wheels On Meals, Dragons Forever and the Lucky Stars movies.

Also, made a sorta-obvious reference to Rush Hour here; before some people get angry, I am a big fan of Jackie Chan and have no intention of undermining his performance but come on, did they have to hire him for voice-acting?

Shun, and his mannerisms, is more than a little bit inspired by Himura Kenshin from the famous anime Rurouni Kenshin, one of my favourite shows of all time. It really took a while for me to get used to the fact that this fic is set in China, not Japan :D

BTW, the fact that Ming (who plays Tigress) and Shun (who plays Tai Lung) are dating is sort of my first 'baby-steps' into writing a full-on TigressxTaiLung romance, as well as a tribute to the popular pairing. Ming's onstage kiss with Yuen Biao (who plays Po) is my shout-out to all the lovely Pogress fics out there.

Crane worrying over Mei Ling is a reference to the previous Mei Ling trilogy, as this is set after that. Just so you guys know, I'm not breaking my 'stand-alone' story rule altogether but if I get inspired, I might write another multi-chapter fic soon.

Finally, the entire scenario is more than just partially based on the the Avatar episode, The Ember Island Players - the 'shipping' tributes and the gender-swapping of the actors, in particular, were pretty much lifted straight from that ^_^;; I'm just hoping the TV series in production for KFP right now takes a cue from Avatar (which I know has a very slim chance of happening...)

Anyways, read and review guys! Thanks for all your continued support!