Chapter 9: Brave Enough

"Where have you been, Hermione?" Ron accuses as she sits down next to Harry at the Gryffindor table.

"Excuse me?" she shoots back.

"You missed breakfast and lunch," he points out. "And Lav says you weren't in your room last night. Where were you?"

"And why would you care?" Ron looks like Hermione slapped him, but she's in no mood to pander to his accusations at the moment. After several hours of dueling with Draco, she had almost forgotten Ron's lie. How is she supposed to trust him when he lied to her when she was at her most vulnerable with him? Sure, this timeline he didn't lie, but if she didn't happen upon them she has no doubt he would have done it all over again.

"So how was the rest of the party, Harry?" Hermione turn her attention, and thoughts, to him. He seems to be trying to hide a slight smile at Ron's gaping face.

"It was fine, I guess. Rather boring. I hung out with Ginny the whole time and we talked, but everyone just stayed in their groups. Slughorn made a speech about how nice it was for us all to get together and tried to convince us to mingle more. Didn't work, and people left after that," he explains.

She nods. Ron begins digging into the food he had momentarily forgotten, but shots her a dirty look every few bites. Hermione speaks to Harry for a few more minutes, but then Ginny slumps into the seat next to him-she's so close, she's almost in his lap-immediately claiming his attention and chatting away.

Hermione glances over the grand hall and catch Malfoy watching her. He cocks his head to the side when their eyes meet, a silent request. She shrugs and rolls her eyes in response. He smirks, then turns back to his house mate. Looking back, Hermione finds Ron glaring at her with narrowed eyes. She shakes her head, unsure whether she should be relieve or sad that his anger hurts a little less now than it did before.


Sitting in the common room Sunday has Hermione's lunch wanting to make a reappearance. Lavender is sitting in Ron's lap, giggling annoyingly when she not snogging him senseless. Harry nudges his female friend, drawing her attention away from the disgusting sight. He nods towards the portrait hole and she follow him out.

After wandering the empty halls in comfortable silence, Harry stops and turns to her in a deserted corridor.

"How are you doing?" he asks, green eyes earnestly staring into her brown ones. Hermione shrugs a little.

"Fine, I guess."

"The whole thing with Ron seems to be getting to you."

"Which one?" He chuckles.

"Donno, which one? The Lavender thing or the suspicious act?"

"Both," she sighs.

"I know," he says simply.

"I wanted us to have something, Ron and I," she confesses. "But I don't know if he'll ever fully trust me. Or if I can trust him." The last part comes out as a whisper, but Harry still heard it.

"Has something happened?"

"I just...I found out recently that he lied to me about something important. There's nothing I can really do about it now, but I don't know how to believe what he says," she says, picking her words carefully. Harry blows all the air out through his mouth.

"Ron's tends to take the easy way sometimes," he sighs. "If he thinks a lie sounds better than the truth, and sees it as-well, inconsequential-he has little scruples with lying instead. Not to mention he can get a suspicious of everyone and everything. Maybe that's from growing up with Fred and George," he chuckles. "Ron's one of my best mates, but he's certainly not easy to get along with sometimes."

"No he's not. He's been one of my best friends, but I'm not going to let him bully me around because of it."

"I know," Harry smiles. "You've never been one to do something just because someone wants you to." Hermione smiles back.

"Thanks for understanding. Are we okay?"

"Of course, Hermione. There is something I wanted to talk to you about though." He suddenly looks nervous. She waits. "So Ginny and me, well we got together last night and...well, she's my girlfriend now." He just stares at his shoes, the shy boy with no clue about girls that she remembers.

"Harry, it's fine. That's great, right?" He smiles.

"It is."

"Well good."

They continue meandering through the halls, enjoying each other's company. It's been too long since Harry and Hermione spent time together.


Monday evening finds Hermione sitting in the common room, attempting to complete the charms essay. Ron sits beside her on the couch with Lavender in his lap. They make smacking noises as they snog that the witch can't seem to block out. She glances up at the couple to see Lavender looking at her. The flirtatious girl winks and then turns back to Ron, kissing him with renewed fervour. Hermione's eyes narrow at the sight. She slams her book closed. The noise startles the couple, but Hermione doesn't look as she packs her things. Lavender giggles.

Hermione heads for the library to finish her homework, but her feet take her to the seventh floor corridor instead. Looking at the wall, she begins to pace.

'I need somewhere to study,' she thinks. 'Somewhere to do homework. Somewhere that's peaceful.'

The door appears, the castel understanding her needs better than she does, and she meanders into the provided room. The carpet is plush and white. There are a few comfy chairs and table on one end and some reference books on bookshelves on the other. Scanning the room, her eyes are drawn to the white blonde hair crouched in the corner over a book.

"Malfoy?" His head snaps up at the sound of her voice. One corner of his mouth lifts.

"Couldn't stay away, Granger?" She rolls her eyes and walk to the gathered chairs.

"I didn't know you would be here," she defends.

"Sure you didn't," he winks. She drop her bag onto the table loudly.

"I just needed to get out of the common room," she confesses as she pulls out the charms homework.

"All those bloody Gryffindors getting to you?" he smirks.

"Just two in particular."

"Ah, the weasel and the slag."

"Malfoy," she reprimands with raised eyebrows. He just chuckles.

"Just because you haven't noticed her snogging anyone before doesn't mean the rest of us are so blind." With eyebrows still raised, she gives him a confused look. Malfoy sighs. "Lavender Brown has been caught in so many broom closets in her time and not usually with the same wizard. It's common knowledge, Granger." Hermione blushes at the implication and look back to her homework.

"Anyways, I've got charms," she says without glancing up.

"Well you best get to it then," Malfoy chuckles. She looks up at his smirk and roll her eyes before returning to her assignment.

The hours pass quietly as they make their way through mounds of homework. A small chime sounds throughout the room and Draco starts to pack his things.

"Half an hour until curfew," he comments, when he sees Hermione looking.

"Oh." She packs up her things as well. "Do you come here every night?" She asks. He shrugs.

"Pretty much. It's easier studying here."

"I'll probably see you more often then. I don't know if I can stand doing homework in the common room with those two going at it." Hermione's face scrunches up, but Malfoy only smirks.

"Just admit that you miss me." She laughs, honestly laughs.

"In your dreams." He laughs too as they leave, heading to their own common rooms.


Ron and Lavender are still snogging when Hermione returns. She resists the urge to tell Ron that he really needs to study and instead goes right up to her room. She closes the curtains around her bed and sighs.

"Clear your mind," she murmur to herself. Clearing everything away before drifting off to sleep.


For one week, Hermione meets with Draco in the Room of Requirement each night and works on homework. Besides for the small jibes and pleasantries, they worked in near silence. It's comfortable.

"You miss him," Malfoy commented as he walks into the room Friday night to see Hermione sitting in a plush chair, lines drawing down her mouth and eyes as she stares at nothing. The witch blinks, shrugs and looks away from him.

"I miss what we had. But now I don't know if it was ever real," she replies.

"Because of one lie?" She shakes her head.

"No. Sure that's what got me thinking about it all again, but that's not why I'm questioning it now. We were just reaching out for something to make us feel human, something to prove that we were still alive in the long and miserable nightmare that was the war. We needed that, I guess. We called it love, but...that's not what is was."

"If the war...if it went the other way, do you think you two would have stayed together?" he asks. She chuckles lightly, but her eyes stay sad as she looks at the floor.

"No. We buried so much. There was so much we wanted to say, needed to, but kept our mouths closed and tried to pretend like it wasn't hurting like hell because we had to. It was war. We couldn't be fighting among ourselves as well."

"Like how he left you?" Draco asks. Hermione's eyes are finally drawn to look at him. His grey eyes are churning with fire, curiosity and something else burning there. "How he accused you of cheating on him with Potter?"

"Yes," she says, willing herself to not shy away. "When he came back, he knew that didn't happen, but he was still suspicious. He thought I wanted Harry more than him, and that never went away. Perhaps there was more bad than good in that relationship. We just didn't want to be alone." Hermione breaks her gaze away to look at her hands.

"I understand." His words snap her attention back to him. He's looking off as if staring into the past. When his eyes shift back to her, he says, "I don't feel like studying." She nods.

"Me neither."

"Let's step out for a moment. I want to change the room." Hermione grabs her bag and follows him out. When they enter the room again, soft plush carpet covers the floor in a deep green. There isn't any furniture or torches. The ceiling mimics the night sky, a million stars sparking and giving light. She stares in wonders and Draco walks past her, setting down his bag by the door and laying on the ground. Hermione follows suit, laying down with her head near his, but her body going the opposite direction.

"Beautiful," she murmurs.

"Granger, why didn't you leave the country with your parents?" he asks. She glances at him out of the corner of her eye, but he's just staring at the stars.

"Because this is my world too. I couldn't just walk away as it fell apart and I couldn't just leave Harry."

"Do you love him?"

"What is this? Twenty questions?"

"What's that?" he asks, innocently.

"Nevermind. Yes, I love Harry...as a brother. He's family," she replies.

"I get that...I mean staying in hell for family."

"Your mum? You stayed for her?" she asks.

"Yeah, she deserved more that what she got. The war was bad to her. Not that it was good to anyone. Father slowly slipping from grace. The dark lord using our ancestral home as a both a hotel for followers and a torture station. She kept it together, you know, but...it wore on her. I don't how much more she could have handled."

"I'm sorry," she whispers. He shrugs beside her.

"It was war." The silence settles over them, a bit heavy. 'The stars twinkle continuously, regardless of the horrors fought beneath them,' Hermione remembers thinking one night in the forest of Dean. The stars don't change.

"What are you going to do about the Weasel?" Malfoy cuts through the silence.

"You said you understood. What did you mean?" she asks instead-not yet having an answer to give.

"What?"

"Before, when I said we just didn't want to be alone, you said you understood," she presses.

"You weren't the only who had flings to keep the cold away," he answers simply.

"Would you do it again?" He turns his head to look at her from where he's laying.

"Granger?"

"Would you do it again? The flings?" She doesn't look at him, though his eyes stay on her.

"I don't know. Probably. It was war after all and I wasn't put in Gryffindor for a reason. It wasn't a lie. We all knew we were just trying to forget everything for moment, lose ourselves in each other. We didn't speak of love or relationships. We were just surviving."

"I couldn't do that," she whispers.

"I know." Hermione turns her head and looks at his grey eyes.

"I thought I loved him. And I know it helped sometimes. But I don't want to bury the truth and gloss over what's wrong. That just...it made it harder. I don't know if I could do it again with him, knowing how it's be, knowing how he'd be."

"That's why you're in Gryffindor. You're brave enough to be alone," Draco replied easily.

"I don't know if it has anything to do with bravery," she says.

"It does." The quiet takes over once more, but it is easy and comforting. When the room chimes, they steal a smile before heading their separate ways.