Alistair slowly opened his eyes fear gripping him when he realised he couldn't move from the neck down. He turned his head; at least he could do that. Carver was sitting in the chair next to the bed at what appeared to be an extremely uncomfortable angle.
"Carver!"
Carver leapt out of the chair, groaning and rubbing his neck before realising Alistair was awake. "Alistair! Don't panic, Anders put a paralysis spell on you. There was so much damage and you were thrashing around something awful."
Alistair closed his eyes, smiling as Carvers fingers gently ran through his hair. "That's unfair." Alistair murmured softly.
Carver grinned. "Oh, why's that?"
"I can't move." Alistair's eyes fluttered open as he felt Carvers breath on his lips.
"You can move your lips." Carver whispered; lowering his head until their lips almost touched, pulling back sharply as the door opened, Alistair only just suppressing the soft moan of protest.
"So how's my patient?" Anders face was pale, dark circles beneath his eyes with worry and lack of sleep.
"I was better a few seconds ago."
Anders raised an eyebrow glancing at Carvers flushed cheeks and chuckled. "Then I shall make my checks quick Commander."
Carver moved beside the window never taking his eyes from Alistair.
Alistair watched Anders face, he could tell a lot from his brother's eyes and the way his mouth would twitch. "So, what was the damage?"
Anders perched on the edge of the bed taking hold of Alistair's wrist and feeling his pulse, nodding to himself. "A nasty head wound; various wounds and bruising to your chest and arms, but the most worrying injury was to your lower back."
Alistair watched him nervously. "And?"
Anders smiled. "And you're bloody lucky you have such an awesome brother. The damage looked worse than it was, though you have been out cold for three days. There was some internal bleeding, but once that was under control and the armour was removed from your back I was able to fix you up." Anders let his mask slip. "I thought we were going to lose you." His voice trembled slightly. "I like having you around, no more getting crushed."
Alistair closed his eyes. "I'll do my best."
"I'll take the paralysis spell from you, but no vigorous activity." Anders turned to Carver giving him a piercing look.
Alistair chuckled at Carver whose cheeks were so red he looked ready to explode. "I'll be careful." He groaned in pain as he tried to sit up, almost embarrassed when Anders and Carver moved to help him. He let out a shuddering breath. "How long will it take for me to get back into fighting condition?"
"A few weeks at least." He raised an eyebrow at Alistair's grimace. "Alistair an injury like that needs time to heal; it's not something that can be fixed overnight, but you heal remarkably quickly and you have the best healer in Ferelden." Anders grinned smugly.
"Yeh, Merrill is damn good." Alistair teased, though his mind was working furiously having to readjust his planning.
Anders shook his head pretending to look distraught. "I am unappreciated in my time." He turned to leave startled when Alistair reached out for him, a moan of pain leaving his lips. "Don't over stretch yourself!" Anders chided.
"Thanks Anders, for everything."
"What are younger brothers for." He slipped out of the room, winking at Carver whose flush deepened.
Alistair closed his eyes waiting for the spasm of pain to stop and felt the dip in the bed and the heat of Carver's body next to him. Slowly he opened his eyes, his breath catching at the undisguised emotion on Carvers face.
Carver chewed his lip nervously. "Did you hear what I said before you passed out?"
Alistair had a hazy recollection. "You told me to keep breathing and not to die."
Carver swallowed hard. "Did you hear me say anything else?"
Alistair wasn't sure how to reply. He thought he had heard Carver say he loved him, but assumed that was of his own imagining. "I'm not sure." Alistair watched as Carver stood and paced the room before sitting back down and then getting up to pace again. "Carver for the love of the Maker please sit still."
Carver winced and returned to sit next to him, suddenly clasping Alistair's hand and leaning so close their lips were almost touching. "I told you I loved you, you infuriating man." He closed the gap between them closing his eyes as he pressed his lips to Alistair's. He felt his whole body tremble as Alistair responded, felt his heart almost explode as he felt the soft pressure of a curious tongue and welcomed the exploration, sinking into the warmth of Alistair's mouth. Carver was aware of a soft moan, but had no idea if it was from himself or Alistair and realised he didn't care. One hand moved to Alistair's jaw, running his fingers across the stubble as he relaxed into the kiss, tasting Alistair's mouth and wanting more. He felt Alistair's fingers gently pressing against his neck urging him closer. He was happy to oblige, the moan that filled his ears his own and he greedily increased the pressure of his kiss, his tongue exploring with more intensity their lips almost melding. When Carver finally drew back he was breathless, his whole body alive with sensation.
Alistair gazed at Carver running his tongue against his lips, swollen with Carvers attention. "I remember." Alistair whispered. "I thought I was hallucinating, or dreaming." He gently cupped Carver's cheek with a trembling hand, having little strength. "Maybe I'm dreaming now."
Carver clasped his hand and pressed a kiss to his palm. "No dream. Just me and you. If you want that."
Alistair gazed at Carver and closed his eyes. "Carver I do, but …."
Carver felt his heart constrict. "But what?"
"We are Wardens. You know what that means."
"Alistair it's a death sentence either way I know that, but I'm damned if I'm going to let it stop me living. Regardless of whether I get to be with you one hour or a lifetime, I want to take whatever time we can have." Carver pressed his lips insistently to Alistair's, relieved when Alistair's response was as feverish as his own. "I love you Alistair. I want us to spend what time we do have together."
Alistair pulled Carver tight to him ignoring the pain as he practically attacked his lips. I hope one day you will forgive me. "I want that too." Alistair murmured as he pulled back slightly, his words whispered against Carvers lips.
xXx
Alistair gingerly made his way to the war room. Walking was painful, though Anders had assured him it would ease although he had caught him giving a worried look to Zevran, but chose not to pursue it. It had been three days since he had regained consciousness and Anders had finally allowed him to get up. It hadn't been all bad. He allowed a warm smile to drift across his face, having Carver's attention had more than made up for being stuck in bed. He leaned against the wall, frustrated by the weakness that dragged at his limbs. He allowed his thoughts to drift back to Carver, those talented lips and powerful body. Alistair felt a tremble of desire run through him; he had never realised how amazing simply kissing could be, but he wanted more. Maker help him he wanted much more. He moved off again; limping painfully, focusing his attention back on putting one foot in front of the other.
Bryce looked up and smiled when he entered. "Alistair, it's good to see you up and about."
Alistair smiled; gratefully taking the seat offered, wincing as he sat down. "I would imagine I've missed a lot."
Bryce nodded. "The tunnels are almost cleared, we just have one section left and that will hopefully take no more than a week to clear. Keeper Marethari and Merrill have been working on magical enhancements for the Peaks structure, including resistance to fire, should the need arise. The dwarves have been able to make more explosives from whatever stock you had in the cellars. I gave them free rein; I hope you have no objection."
Alistair shook his head. "No objection, anything that will give us an edge."
"We had several groups scout the valley you suggested." He unravelled more detailed maps of the area.
Alistair's mind worked quickly. It gave the perfect high ground and plenty of terrain that was defensible. He pointed to the southern side of the valley. "This would seem to be our best chance. Plenty of high ground and enough space to withdraw without bringing it too close to the Peak."
"Alistair if I may, what is it you intend to do once the Archdemon is in the valley?"
"Damage it as much as we can with weapons; magic, explosives, whatever we have at our disposal. Get it grounded and kill the damned thing."
Bryce rubbed his chin in thought. "If we have archers stationed here and here," He pointed to two ridges that marked a choke point leading into the valley. "If we can somehow get it to come through this point we should be able to get some good shots. Dworkin is working on increasing the explosive yield of arrows. If he can do that a few well placed shots could bring it down."
"If we can take out its wings, we have it."
Bryce eyed him cautiously. "Alistair …. your injury …"
Alistair glanced at the Teyrn. "By the time we are ready I will be fit enough to fight."
"Perhaps it would be best if …... "
"I will be fit enough to fight." Alistair insisted.
Bryce nodded. "As you say."
xXx
Loghain eyed the Warden Commander as he limped unsteadily across the courtyard heading towards the Dalish. "Will you ever get anything right?" He snarled.
Alistair hesitated and glanced over, the Teyrn's face dark with hatred. "To what are you referring now Loghain?"
"Urgel's death could not be afforded!"
Alistair felt a spasm clench his heart at the loss of his friend. "His sacrifice will not be in vain."
"Will it not!" He gave Alistair a piercing look. "You are useless to us on the battlefield now." Loghain hissed.
Alistair winced and changed his direction moving slowly over to him, each step tortuous. "It is not ideal, but I will be healed enough for the Archdemon."
Loghain sneered. "Everyone here knows the truth, you will never walk properly again. What are you going to do, ask the Archdemon to hold on while you get to it?"
Alistair clenched his fists. "This isn't about my injury and you know it. This is about Elissa."
"Do not speak her name!" Loghain roared.
"She was my friend and I will speak her name if I wish."
"You didn't deserve her affections."
Alistair gave him a pitying look. "Loghain she didn't love you and your pushing her sent her to me."
Loghain's face darkened with rage. "Liar!"
"I am many things Loghain, but a liar is not one of them. Elissa did not appreciate your attentions and despite making that clear to you, you persisted." He gave a deep sigh, running his hand through his hair. "It started as harmless flirting; she thought if you saw her interest in someone else you would back off. She didn't want me any more than she wanted you, but you kept pushing."
Neither man noticed that people were watching their argument. Eleanor held back her husband and son. "These things need to be said. Should it go too far intervene then."
"She accepted your proposal!" Loghain snarled jealousy and bitterness consuming him. "What could you, a bastard prince offer her that I could not?"
Alistair rubbed his forehead in agitation. "Friendship; love, a life without you harassing her."
Loghain moved closer, his muscles tensing for a fight. "You are nothing! I don't know what you did to turn her from me …"
Loghain didn't get the chance to finish. Alistair ignored the pain that ripped through his body; his former Templar training coming to the forefront, his mind and body disciplined, able to set aside the pain. He grabbed Loghain and jammed him hard against the wall, his face dark with rage. His voice strained with tension, every word laced with frustration. "She didn't love either of us, get over it! We have an Archdemon to deal with. Our country is on its knees and you allow yourself to be consumed by petty jealousy. Get your head screwed on Loghain; our enemy is the Darkspawn, if we keep fighting among ourselves the Archdemon has already won. Now I've made mistakes and I take ownership of each one. There isn't a night that goes passed when I don't see the faces of the dead; the people I failed, but this plan will work and should we still be standing after the Archdemon is dead I will be happy to duel you, but until then back off."
Loghain wanted to rip Alistair apart with his bare hands, but he suddenly realised Bryce and Renden were moving towards them and their looks were very clear, he had gone too far. "So be it." He snarled, shocked that he couldn't release himself from Alistair's grip.
"Are we done here?" Alistair hissed.
"For now."
Alistair backed away, every movement causing agony he refused to show. No-one approached him as he resumed his walk towards the Dalish, knowing he would refuse their help while Loghain watched him. Alistair made it to Marethari's tent and collapsed; Merrill holding him as he shook with pain, burying his face against her shoulder as he gritted his teeth trying to suppress the tears. Merrill slowly flowed her magic through him, Marethari sending Tarren to get Anders while she put together a potion.
Merrill began to sing softly as she ran her fingers through his hair, relieved when the tension began to ease. "He is a fool." She whispered softly in Alistair's ear.
"He's in pain, but I can't ….." Alistair hissed at the spasm of pain, shuddering violently as Merrill continued to sooth him. As his body relaxed again, Alistair slumped against her. "I'm so tired of his hate."
Merrill gently kissed his forehead and helped him to drink the potion Marethari handed to her. "Drink this, it will help."
Alistair drank the liquid surprised by the sweet taste and gave a sigh of relief as the pain eased. "Thank you."
Marethari knelt beside him. "This potion must be used sparingly; consumed frequently it will leave you insensible, but it is extremely effective for infrequent use. I will create some for the battle when it comes if you wish."
Alistair nodded. "Thank you Marethari, I would appreciate that."
They glanced up as Anders made his way into the tent, followed by an anxious Carver who knelt beside Alistair gently cupping his cheek. "Are you..."
"I'm fine." Alistair whispered suddenly feeling exhausted. "I just reached my limit with Loghain was all." He allowed Carver to help him to his feet, wincing as he rolled back his shoulders.
Anders and Marethari spoke briefly, before the brothers and Carver made their way back into the building. Alistair moving slowly, but steadier on his feet than he had been. He was going to go to the war room but Carver gently guided him towards the stairs. Alistair raised an eyebrow, unable to help the cheeky grin. "We going somewhere in particular Carver?"
Carver gave him an equally cheeky smile. "Yes Commander."
Alistair chuckled softly and sank onto his bed as Carver closed the door. He winced painfully and was startled when Carver gently removed his tunic. "What, no kissing first?"
Carver flushed and nudged him playfully. "On your stomach Commander."
Alistair moved onto his stomach feeling nerves add to the tension in his body. Moments later as Carver's strong hands gently began to knead out the knots in the muscles of his back Alistair allowed himself to relax, giving soft sighs of appreciation as he felt the tension ease. "You have wonderful hands Carver." He mumbled into the pillow.
Carver smiled happily and carefully leaned over placing soft kisses to Alistair's neck, feeling his stomach tighten at the soft moan of pleasure.
"Wonderful lips too." Alistair mumbled as Carver slowly traced the ridges of muscle with his lips, lingering on scars as he continued to tease out the knotted muscles. He gingerly turned himself; gently pulling Carver against him, sinking into blue eyes before reaching for those lips that set his body on fire. Alistair's kiss was slow at first; a tender meeting of lips, breath mingling as his tongue danced lightly against Carvers lips before sinking into a welcoming mouth. Carvers moan stirred his blood and their kiss became one of hunger and desire. Alistair ran his fingers through Carver's hair pulling him closer. "Carver." It was a breathless request, his eyes dark with need.
Carver pulled back slightly, his body aching with want. "Alistair; it's too soon, your injury..." He trailed off under the intense stare. His body trembled and he resumed their kiss, pressing Alistair against the bed, trailing his lips across the scar at his throat. He felt Alistair tense, but continued to kiss the length of the scar. "I've waited so long to show you how much I love you." Carver whispered.
Alistair felt the tremble move through his body, his voice husky when he spoke. "Show me."
Carver grinned wickedly. "Is that an order Commander?"
Alistair shook his head, cupping Carvers face and drawing him in for a deep kiss. "No orders. I just …. I just want to be with you."
Carver's face lit up, his heart feeling as though it would burst. "I love you Ali..." Cut off as Alistair drew him in for another kiss.
xXx
Alistair gazed at Carver who was sleeping in his arms. His whole body was aching; but he didn't care, still floating in the euphoria of finally being with Carver. He leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead, smiling as Carver nestled closer to him. Alistair smiled, clasping Carvers hand that had come to rest on his chest. "No matter what happens we will always have this night together and that's something the Archdemon can't take away." His spoke for himself; but Carver shifted in his sleep, the words working their way through to his dreams.
"Love you Ali." Carver mumbled.
Alistair raised an eyebrow a smile curling his lips. "Ali huh."
Carver sighed in his sleep and smiled broadly. "My Ali."
Alistair chuckled and allowed himself to close his eyes, Carvers reassuring presence chasing his nightmares away.
