Wow, I actually managed to update within a week this time. I was a bit disappointed by the lack of Harry/Ruth in 10.3, and I'm sure I wasn't the only one. So I hope that this chapter will make up for it, even though it is rather angsty (sorry about that). And thanks again to the people who left me a review, I really treasure every single one of them!


Ruth spent the next few evenings on the Grid after work hours, deciphering the data hidden on the microdot bit by bit, and slowly puzzling all the pieces together. When she came home late on the fourth day and stepped into the dark hallway of her flat, she instantly sensed that something was different, but she wasn't sure of what it was.

Fidget hadn't come out to greet her the way he usually did. But then again he was getting old, so he was probably asleep and hadn't heard her come in, she thought to herself.

She switched on a light before shrugging off her coat and hanging it on a peg. She then moved into the direction of her sitting room, still cautious and feeling slightly uncomfortable.

"If I didn't know any better I would think that you were avoiding me," an all too familiar voice said just as she was about to flick another light switch. She let out a small gasp at the sound of his voice, but soon recomposed herself. As soon as the light came on she spotted Harry in a corner of the room.

He was sitting in her favourite armchair with Fidget neatly curled up in his lap, purring softly.

"You nearly gave me a heart attack," was all she managed to say.

"I'm sorry about invading your house late at night, but I couldn't really think of another option. I can't exactly just ring you up at work at the moment," he grinned slightly.

"It's alright, I'm glad you're here," she said as she walked over to where he was sitting. "I missed you," she said, bending down so she could kiss him.

He eagerly responded to the kiss, and it struck her just how easily and comfortably both of them slipped into their roles, as if greeting each other with a kiss after a long day was the most natural thing in the world. She could definitely get used to this.

After ending the kiss Ruth kneeled down next to the chair and softly stroked Fidget's fur. "It's amazing how comfortable he is with you," she said. "Normally he wouldn't behave like this towards anyone but me."

"It took me months to gain his trust after," he paused, "after you left. He really despised me at first, but he learned to trust me in the end."

She scratched the cat behind its ear, and he purred again. "He probably just missed me, which is why he didn't want anything to do with you at first. Cats are stubborn that way. But he isn't stupid either, which explains why, in the end, he decided that he liked you after all."

Harry chuckled softly as he listened to Ruth talking about her cat as if she had psychoanalysed it many times over. All joking aside though, he did think she had a point. Not that he would ever tell her that, obviously.

He got up and softly put the cat back down in the chair, who gave him a momentary disturbed look, but soon curled up again and continued its peaceful slumber. He took Ruth's hand and together they sat down on the sofa.

"How's work?" he asked her.

Ruth shrugged. "Same as it has been for a while I'm afraid, it's rather boring. But Dimitri did manage to find me some files which could be useful for when we prepare your case for the inquiry."

Harry's eyebrows shot up simultaneously. "Why would you do anything like that?" he asked, surprised. "I appreciate it of course, don't get me wrong, but I really don't want either of you risking your career because of me, at least not more than you already have."

She sighed. "I don't care about any of that Harry, don't you get that? The inquiry will be about your whole career, so you can expect them to start digging up dirt in the most unlikely places. Which means you have to be prepared for anything they might throw at you. I can't just let you appear before the inquiry panel completely unprepared."

He lovingly cupped her face with both hands, thereby forcing her to look him in the eye. "You're amazing, you know that?" he said. "I admire your loyalty and your integrity so much. You act selflessly and always put others first, which is one of the best traits anyone could possibly possess. But at this point I am asking you to take a step back and allow these events to take its course. The inquiry will happen and, no matter how prepared we are, they will always find something they can charge me with. And I know, because I've seen it happen far too many times before."

Ruth shook her head in disbelief. "I can't believe you're giving up this easily, that you're just going to let this all happen and let them bring you down without a fight."

"That's not what I'm doing Ruth, and deep down you know it as well as I do. I'm not the man I used to be when I was young, and reckless. This time I'm choosing my battles carefully, and this is one I'm almost certain to lose. So what's the point in fighting, in wasting energy on something that is a lost cause to begin with?"

"You're gambling with your life, can't you see that? From where I'm standing I think it's highly unlikely that they're just going to let you off lightly with a slapped wrist. We're talking prison here, Harry, and throwing the best years of your life away because you've suddenly decided to "choose your battles"? I can't believe I'm hearing this."

She had turned away from him now, both because she wasn't sure she could still look at him, and because she didn't want him to see that she was crying.

"Ruth," he began, without having the faintest idea of what he wanted to say. Because, in truth, he really had no idea.

He started again. "I don't want to go to prison, believe me. But I have a feeling that, in this particular case, struggling will only make things worse, and make the process just that more painful. And if I'm going down, I would prefer to do so with some of my dignity still intact, rather than being remembered as the old fool who went down kicking and screaming. Do you understand where I'm coming from?" he asked her.

Ruth nodded and turned back towards him, her eyes now red and puffy, and her cheeks streaked with tears. "I do understand," she said after a while. "But what about us?"

She realised how selfish that sounded, but she just had to ask. This thing between them, whatever it was, had barely properly begun, and now that she'd had a taste of all that could be, the thought of having to give it all up again frightened her more than any of her worst nightmares could.

Harry sighed and pulled her towards him, enveloping her in a firm hug and kissing the top of her head. "I don't know Ruth," he said softly.


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