A flicker of dying light and the sun went down below the skyline. A light tap sounded on the door and a plump woman with a drunk's demeanor entered the dark room. She held a shaking candle that held on to a silver stand as the woman's wobbly legs held her up but only just. Her bright blue and dark black dress shimmers in the candlelight.
"Good evening, your majesty," Her bright red lips spoke in a slurred manner.
"Good evening," I replied staring at her red, pinched cheeks.
"I am here to gather you for dinner," She explained with a loud hiccup. My brows unintentionally furrowed at her lack of manners but things have been so different since I've arrived here that I assume it isn't rude to make bodily noises at one's guests.
"Of course," I replied suddenly taking notice of the hunger pangs as I wrestled with a severe stomach growl. "Please, lead the way," She nodded and after some effort on her part and my growing frustration going up another level, she managed to turn herself around. We walked into the main room where the light from her candle set the brightly decorated room with an eerie shadow. I stopped as a spider's long leg retreated back into the corner, safe within the shadows. Didn't someone with a spider's leg pick me up from where I landed in the place?
"Your Majesty?" A slurred voice sounded shaking me from my thoughts. I turn back to her and smiled,
"Forgive me, let us carry on," I say following her once more to another side room. She pulled open the door and bowed as I walked in, I began to worry she would topple over but when I turned to check on her the door stood closed and she was nowhere to be found, the room shone bright with walls of candles and in the center of the room was a grand table but no one sat at the chairs in front of the extravagant dinner. I frowned but felt too hungry to really want to complain about eating alone, so I sat down and ate like a lady, slow and with careful thought but I made sure to eat until I was full which took some time. I began to feel a wave of tiredness weigh on me and so I stood when I was finished and bowed to the table, "Thank you for this wonderful meal, I only wish someone would have been here to enjoy it with me," I said quietly. I make my way to the deep red wood doors push it open and made my way into the hall, carefully folding my hands I walk back to the main room without a candle, wondering if I will see the spider's leg I saw before. "I know you're in here," I said looking around but there was no movement and not a sound, sighing, defeated for the day I nod, "It seems everyone is overjoyed for me to be here but no one can bother to keep me company," I twist my fingers nervously, "It makes me wonder how important I really am," I confess to the dark corner, "Or what I'm really doing here at all," I look up at the window and see a moon rising, I close my eyes and nod my head, "I may have been alone at home but at least I had my rose garden, at least I had something," My voice trails off and I drop my hands to my sides, a single tear gathers in my eye and I slowly shake my head, "I don't think I ever felt so alone."
"Hush my darling," A strong steady voice sounded from behind me, "Do not turn around for I do not wish you to see me like this," He said softly, so I stood still and I felt strong sturdy arms wrap themselves around me almost twice, my eyes closed reflexively and feel his embrace warming me to my core, something about the way he held me felt right. Almost more than the royal hatmaker, my heart gave me a squeeze of pain that echoed in my body and I opened my eyes realizing who held me.
"The spider who saved me," I whisper. A deep chuckle sounded from behind me as a warm breath touched me, he smells like black tea leaves and chocolate, "Can you tell me your name?" I ask leaning into the familiar smell, I knew it-knew him from somewhere but I just couldn't place where. A light breeze slid into the room where we stood, my hair flowing back behind me, the spider took a deep breath in and sighed longingly.
"I have missed this smell," He said touching my hair with a tender caress. "I have missed you so while you have been away," The brim of a hat tapped my head as he grew closer still.
"Who are you?" I asked praying he would tell me, even though a part of me knew he wouldn't, I had to figure it out, not because it would send me into a shocked state but there was something more than that, I needed to figure it out.
"I am whoever you wish me to be," He replied setting the brim of his hat on the side of my head as a smile enters his voice. I furrowed my brows, a deep chuckle sounded once more, "I was once a King of a distant land," He explains while I close my eyes and feel the soothing lull of his voice, the rumble of his words shake against my back as he leaned against me. "I ruled with such love and care that I attracted a Princess' attention, to this Princess nothing was more important than the people she ruled over and the King she wanted would have to be just as kind and loving." He waved a shadowed hand in front of my eyes, "She came to call upon me one day," I saw a young woman with sunshine colored hair standing before a man I couldn't see on a throne, "She is the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in all his days, more beautiful than the reddest rose, more elegant than silk, more fluid and graceful than the movement of the water in a lake, more loving and accepting than anyone whom he had encountered in his lifetime. He would have given her furs, silks, and any finery she wanted, spoiled her to the core if she would have allowed him, he would have given her the world on a silver platter had she asked it of him," He waved his hand again and a beautiful red rose garden appeared, the man and woman walking together, "He often visited her at every spare moment he had, he was entirely captured by her, he wanted more of her time, so he had his servants plant a rose garden without knowing anything of roses, he just wanted to do something that would make her smile. The king invited the young woman to visit him one day," The scene changed to a wilted, dying garden where the woman stood alone with her hands over his face crying, "Even though he had done this for her out of love, it appeared as though the King mocked the young Princess." The scene changed once more to the young woman speaking to a different King who had a Queen by his side, "Her father became very wrathful with the King from another land and swore vengeance to the young King for mocking his daughters love." The young King was distraught at the thought he had done anything to harm the Princess he had come to love. The Princess' father declared war on the distant land and the following year they attacked the King, the land was destroyed, burned to a cinder, nothing left and the King who had ruled the lands was thought to be dead." A bright flash of red fire appeared scaring me back into his arms, he held me tighter as the fire faded and a ruined castle sat in the middle of ash and cinder. "The following day after the army had returned from the attack a messenger arrived and went to the young woman's window in the form of a bird." A picture of a beautiful blue jay sat on the window ledge with a note strapped to it's small leg. "The Princess read the note, in it was an apology from the King, he had not meant to harm the roses, he admitted to letting his excitement get the better of him, he told her he knew nothing of roses or how they grew but he wanted more time with her and that nothing made him happier than to see her smile and so he wanted to make a garden for her so that she could have somewhere that would be like home to her because he wanted her to be his Queen and if she accepted his apology she could come show him how to plant roses and they could live together forever because," He paused showing the Princess smiling at the letter, "He loves her. The note was signed by him with his seal under it." An image of the woman in her own rose garden, was holding a brown letter and crying, her father went to her, "The King pressed the Princess for what was bothering her and eventually she surrendered the note to her father. He was ashamed, he begged the Princess for forgiveness but she could not give it to him, not truly, not if he had killed the one man who she loves. The King rode for weeks to get to the distant land," Another picture of the King riding sprung up before me, "When the King arrived he was distraught, the ruined castle was covered in a great, mighty bush of roses and thorns," The castle covered in red roses stood with a grey haired king kneeling before it. "He sent a note to his daughter explaining the castle to her. The Princess set out the next day and when she arrived," A woman sitting on the back of a white horse, dismounted and ran to the castle, tearing her soft skin against the thorns that shielded the castle from the King who stood only feet away. "She climbed to the tallest tower and screamed to her father standing outside, her blood fell on the stones she stood on, making the rose grow tighter and tighter to keep the Princess back in so if the young King of the land ever returned they could offer him the Princess." The King had a single tear run down his cheek as he looked up at his torn, bleeding, precious daughter. "The Princess vowed she would live there until the young King was found." The images vanished and his voice went quiet.
"And then what happened?" I gasped reaching my hand out to the King who stood outside the bloody castle covered in roses, "Did they ever find the young King? Did the Princess stay at the castle? What of her father?" I asked worried about people I had never known until the moment I heard the story.
"The young King was never found, the Princess lived at the castle until her dying days and the father cursed the young King. He wanted his daughter back and he thought if she knew her love was most certainly dead she would leave and come home with him back to the kingdom that loved her so. So the old King traveled to a witch who was famous for her spells and asked that the young King be cursed that if he still remained alive, he should crawl the earth for the rest of eternity, freeing his daughter to do what she was meant to," I felt his warm breath on my neck making me shiver, "The witch said she would grant the King's selfish wish but he must give up the life he treasures most. The King assumed it would be his or his wife's but instead she took the daughters as payment. The old King rode back as fast as his horse was able, the horse died about a day away because the King hadn't stopped to care for it. The King went to the castle and looked up to the tower and all he saw was long, yellow hair curling down the sides of the tower covered in roses and thorns. He grabbed the hair and climbed the tower and saw his daughter holding onto the last letter she had been given by her love, on the back she wrote that she would go join her King and that they would rule the castle in the sky." I gasped deeply, feeling a tear fall slowly down her cheek. "The King walked for weeks to get back to his kingdom. A man who worked at the castle saw the King and ran to him. The King grabbed the man by the collar of his shirt and asked that his Queen knew what happened, what he had done and how sorry he was to his one love, it was all his fault. The King then breathed his last breath and died of a broken heart."
"What a terrible story," I replied without thinking. Another, warmer chuckle sounded as he gave me a tender squeeze.
"I just think we should take her up to the castle," A voice sounded down the hallway,
"It appears my time is up for now your majesty," The spider replied from behind me.
"Spiders used to scare me," I said to him making him pause, "But for some reason you don't," I held my hands together,
"You should be more careful about who you trust," He replied seriously,
"I do trust you though," I said honestly, "I would trust you with anything but I'm not sure why," I shook my head sadly, "I hope that you weren't in the story,"
"She may go into shock, we must be very careful what we reveal to her since that damn cat already told her this is her kingdom," Another voice sounded closer,
"Everyone calls her your majesty, she was bound to be tipped off sooner or later," The voice replied wearily.
"You should return to your room your majesty, eavesdropping is frowned upon in this community," He replied letting his arms release his soft hold on me. "Until we met again," A shadow slipped into the corner and the room was silent again. I hurried into my own room and sighed as I began to look for a match to light a candle, but I didn't know where the matches or candles would be. A light knock sounds at the door,
"Yes?" I called to the darkness. The door opened and a ray of light came into the room.
"Your majesty, have you been in here without light?" The small white rabbit entered the room.
"Unfortunately I have been, I went to dinner and came back and it was dark as could be so I tried searching for matches and candles but I couldn't find either," I laughed at my own silliness but the rabbit looked perplexed,
"Why didn't you call for anyone?" He asked eyeing the room,
"I didn't know I was able to do that," I said having not really thought about it. The rabbit looked positively shocked.
"Of course your majesty, if you need anyone all you need to do it call and someone will come quickly." He walked into the room and picked up a candle and lit it off his own light.
"Oh well now that I know I shall do just that," I said with a smile. The rabbit walked around and began lighting candles all over the room, the bathtub was gone replaced with a golden brass bed with a feather mattress and a large thick blanket.
"It would put me at ease if your majesty would do so, thank you your grace," He said sighing as he lit the last of the seven candles in the room. "Is there anything you require before going to bed?" He asked standing back by the door.
"Just some comfortable clothing to sleep in, I should hate to ruin or wrinkles this lovely dress." I said smoothing the blue material down.
"Of course your majesty," The rabbit snapped his fingers and a wardrobe appeared in the corner of the room. "If you need to change, just stand in front of the wardrobe and tell it what you need and what you want it to look like and it will appear when you open the doors." He said in an even tone.
"Oh how marvelous," I laughed lightly smiling. He gaped at me,
"Your majesty," He said straightening his blue tie, I looked over to him and away from the wardrobe, "There will be a mask ball for you tomorrow evening after dinner time to celebrate your return to Wonderland," The view from my window today returned to my mind, Wonderland, "Be sure to ready yourself straight after dinner and I will send someone to fetch you."
"Of course, how very exciting," I said still smiling, I have always loved dressing up in fine gowns and jewels and going to balls, I'm glad that is something that is done here. I wonder what I should wear?
"If there is nothing more, your grace, I shall go and let you rest,"
"That should be fine, thank you good ser," The rabbit bowed with a twitching ear and closed the door behind him leaving me and the wardrobe alone. I looked it over carefully and decided to open one of the wooden doors, but nothing sat inside. I closed the doors deciding I would try doing as the rabbit had instructed. "A blue satin nightgown with a matching robe," I said. "Oh with ties at the sides," I said reminded of my trial with getting my gown off before on my own and blushed as I thought of the person who was with me when I failed miserably. I put my hand on my heated forehead and breathed slowly.
"It won't bite, you know," I turned on my heel frightened, but the shadow with the mischievous purple eyes and messy hair sat on the corner of the bed watching me.
"Well I know that," I said frowning,
"Then what was keeping you from opening the closet door?" He laughed,
"None of your business," I said feeling my face and ears heated with an embarrassed color. He chuckled and hopped down from the bed,
"Perhaps you need help with your dress?" He asked eying me, I put my hands over my body and shook my head upset, "Or undress?" I tugged my shoe off and threw it, barely missing his patient eyes.
"I don't need your help!" I shouted,
"All right, all right," He surrendered to my obvious displeasure. "I just came by to check on you, make sure you are doing all right, that you weren't overwhelmed." I looked at his shadow standing in front of me, his patient hidden eyes looking down at me as we stood in the candlelight.
"I am doing well," I said blinking slowly.
"Very good," He said placing a hand on the small of my back and his other hand under my chin, "You appear to be well, but you also look startled,"
"That could be," I said stepping back from him, "Because a gentleman is in my room with no chaperon and at night," I retorted with a frown,
"No that isn't it, you know me, you're comfortable with me, you trust me even though you don't know why, there is a feeling deeper than that that you carry for me although you can't put your finger on it," He said taking a step toward me but not putting his hands on me, he seemed to be waiting for something, "This look is something else altogether, something else has startled you," He studied my face for a moment, "Someone else has startled you,"
"Someone was here when I was alone," I confessed looking resigned, either I could tell him or wait for him to slowly piece it altogether on his own. At least this way I was choosing which information to give him.
"Who was it?" He asked narrowing his eyes.
"I don't know," I answered honestly,
"What did they say?"
"He told me a story of a King who loved a Princess and he accidentally offended her and everyone in the story ended up dying, I'm not sure of the point of the story but it made me very sad for him because I knew he was the King from the distant land that everyone thought was dead." I replied with sadness in my eyes.
"How did you know that?" He asked watching me carefully,
"I don't know, I just, something inside knew that was who he is, or was, I'm not sure how to phrase that," I said feeling confused, "I think he has me confused for her," The purple eyes looked shocked,
"With who?"
"With the young Princess he once loved," I replied feeling a wave of exhaustion hitting me heavily.
"Why do you think that?" He asked pushing my hair back from my face,
"He held me,"
"He what?" The purple eyes turned red for a flash of a second,
"There was such sadness in his embrace," I said holding out my arms, "When you held me there was an air of tenderness and care," He tenderly tucked me into his arms, "When he held me there was nothing but sadness and a hollow fear,"
"A fear of what?" He asked tucking my head under his chin,
"Of being alone."
