Finally, he has a face to go with those tantalizing lips and mesmerizing pools of promise and lust. Tim smiles nervously and licks his lips as he looks into those eyes,, desire, full-blown has nearly rendered him speechless.
Gibbs leans over and brushes his lips against Tim's, sensual and breathtakingly gentle before pulling him close, holding him tightly, moving the kiss to his hair as one hand tenderly cups his face, the other wrapping around his back to hold him close .
Neither man speaks as Gibbs gently backs Tim up to the wall behind him, not once letting go of him or breaking the kiss between them. Tim sighs contentedly as the older man continues to touch him, his fingers stroking down Tim's face, tracing over his lips and his throat, blazing a fiery trail back up to the younger man's mouth, his hands gently framing the gorgeous youthful face.
Gibbs gently sucks Tim's bottom-lip into his mouth and sensually sucks on it until Tim moans with pleasure and opens his mouth; inviting the older man in. Accepting the silent invitation with a pleasured moan of his own, Gibbs slips his tongue into Tim's welcoming mouth, taking the time to taste him and make love to the warm cavern and even the tongue that now begins to seductively duel with his.
Unable to stop himself, Tim moans again as his body shivers with the wanton need rising up from within, Before this journey, he had never known a kiss could be this breathtakingly arousing or intoxicating between two men. Taking a breath, he can't help but inhale the sandlewood scent that is all Gibbs, as it fills his nostrils and turns his knees to jello.
Grasping desperately at Gibbs' shirt for added support, Tim's senses are overpowered and he struggles to breathe while his body becomes awash in white-hot need that has begun growing hotter with every passing minute. He hears that voice, rough with arousal that never fails to steal his breath away as it speaks in his ear, sending shivers of want up his spine. "That's it, let go, Tim. Just let it go."
Before Tim even realizes what he's doing, his hands are sliding up Gibbs' shirt, slipping inside the gaps between the buttons. He groans as his hands come in contact with, not the bare skin he desperately craves touching, but rather, the garment he's forgotten the man always wears.
Gibbs chuckles softly as his strong, yet roughened hands join Tim's at the buttons and together they work to unbutton the roadblock keeping them from further skin to skin contact; something they both are suddenly desperate for as their quickened breathing gives testament to. Tim is quickly rewarded when his hands are placed underneath the offending undershirt and gently urged to move on their own.
Almost instantly, he hears Gibbs' breath catch at the first touch of Tim's hands as they slide up the older man's chest and continue to caress him from chest to navel and back again, repeatedly, endlessly in almost featherlite caresses. He's never done this before but somehow, he can't seem to stop, he suddenly wants to feel every inch of Gibbs' skin, as if trying to absorb him through his fingertips. On yet another trail up to the older man's chest, Tim's fingers find and stop to play with Gibbs' nipples, wringing forth a groan of absolute pleasure from the older man, spiking the wave of pure lust through Tim's veins.
As he brings his hands down to raise the shirt up and bends down to apply his lips to those obviously erogenous nipples he suddenly feels the urge to make love to, Gibbs reaches out and pulls him upright and the gentle mouth that has consistently made love to his, now recaptures his own. Tim's lips welcome him back with relish, even though they're feeling tender and swollen from the constant attention they now can't get enough of. His senses are nearly overloaded, causing his thoughts to escape through his mouth in a moan,
"Oh, God! I can't get enough of you" Biting his lip to keep from making a fool of himself again, Tim is surprised to feel Gibbs' mouth gently kiss away his worry even as he speaks to it in that voice that weakens his knees.
"That's it, Tim. Talk to me. Tell me what you want; what you need."
Tim looks Gibbs directly on, his heart in his throat, "I need to feel all of you." He admits shyly, even as his hands continue to roam over the older man's upper body.
"We'll get there. I promise." Gibbs promises as he picks up one of Tim's hands and brings it to his mouth; softly biting his fingers.
Drawn in by the flash of desire that spikes through his veins, Tim watches in awe as his fingers are drawn into that seductive wet mouth and provocatively nibbled and sucked on, one after the other.
With eyes locked on each other, both sets darkened with desire, Tim can't help but feel his spine tingle as he relishes the sensuousness of this attention that's causing his body to vibrate with need and want. The intense pleasure and the arousal he'd never felt this all-consuming before, is washing through him in waves so overpowering, it steals his breath from his lungs.
As his eyes remain locked on Tim, the older man releases the younger one's fingers, plundering that sweet mouth 0nce again, almost desperately now. His demanding kiss now increases the pressure with a physical display of his growing hunger and passion that soon turns into a heated sensual dance even as he envelopes Tim in his arms once more, pulling the younger man in tightly against him. Heatedly, Gibbs repeatedly strokes a hand up and down Tim's spine causing him to tremble from the unexpected delicious friction just as they break apart, both of them gasping for air, their lips red and their faces flushed in arousal
Gibbs reacts to the younger man's visible trembling, touching him compassionately while verbally reassuring him without hesitation. "I promise you this is real!"
Tim silently nods to show he's heard even as he reaches out towards Gibbs' hair timidly, as if he wants to run his fingers through it but doesn't dare presume that it's okay.
"Go, ahead, run your fingers through it." Gibbs' gravelly voice encourages him softly as it whispers in his ear before kissing his temple and traveling down Tim's neck to kiss him there for the first time.
Tim smiles shudders at the new sensation even as he gently runs his fingers through the salt and pepper grey hair of this normally intimidating man. Already, this man, who has done nothing but make love to his mouth tenderly and thoroughly, has firmly lodged himself deeply in Tim's heart. Feeling treasured and wanted since the beginning, Tim now feels filled with a powerful feeling of attraction and wantonness and he begins to let lose as Gibbs has already urged him to do. The man's hair feels silky soft underneath his fingers and smells like the clean sent of the shampoo, the very essence of the man who now consumed his heart and soul.
"Will you stay with me?" Tim worries anxiously even as he surrenders more fully to the attentions of this man of his dreams.
With his eyes shining with truth and desire, Gibbs stops kissing him and raises up to look him straight in the eye and answer him without hesitation, bringing one hand up to gently cup Tim's face again as he speaks.
"I promise you, Tim, I'm not leavin'."
***NCIS***
His eyes popped open and he felt a moment of disorientation before realizing it was morning and he'd slept through the night, obviously with more genuine sleep than his dreams had been giving him lately. Tim remembered that it was Saturday and the team was not on call this weekend. Not sure what woke him and not happy that he was no longer in the dream or even in the reality that had become his just last night, he forced himself to get out of bed and headed for the shower.
With nothing job related to occupy his mind, those thoughts and memories having been erased by the rare experience from last night, his thoughts returned very quickly to all that transpired between himself and Gibbs both last night in reality and within the confines of his dream he's just been pulled from. It wasn't long before Tim found himself once again with throbbing hard and aching for release. The happiness he felt was coming from all the way down to his soul, Of that, he was certain and it plastered a genuine smile on his face from ear to ear. Every time he closed his eyes, Gibbs' eyes were there to greet him, pulling him deeper and deeper into that space of ecstasy as he vividly felt each and every one of the pleasureable emotions that had rolled through him last night; enough that it sent him over the edge quite easily and with very little physical stimulation.
Completely spent from the first genuine sexual experience with so much intensity, he'd seen white spots before his eyes as he'd flown off the edge; he struggled now to recover from the rare physical release that stemmed from that; hanging onto the shower bar for dear life as his heartbeat settled down, taking his breathing back down into normal right along with it. Not caring how cold the water was turning, Tim rode out the wave of exhaustion his release had brought with it until he could gather up the energy enough to quickly wash up and take himself out of the shower. He leisurely get dressed and ready to face the day, seemingly caught up in a wave of slow motion movements that somehow helped keep him buoyed in the sea of all he'd found that was great.
For a straight guy, it sure hadn't taken him long to become convinced to swing the other way. He already couldn't get enough of Gibbs; was almost desperate to have more of him. Now that he had the time to stop and contemplate the changes this had brought about in his life, he realized that his own body had turned on him and it continued to confuse him, at least the part of his brain that was still screaming that he wasn't gay. Tim had to admit that it was taking some serious getting used to; becoming all hot and bothered and completely turned on by another man.
The confusion was burning in his heart and dueling it out with the part of him that wanted to hold onto and treasure what little Gibbs had given him last night. Come to think of it, it may have been little in comparison to some things in a relationship, but coming from Gibbs; it was huge and Tim knew it. That was part of the reason the part of his brain that had accepted this journey into forming his first bi-sexual relationship also refused to believe it was real or that it would last.
A small pitiful part of him was holding on to the hope that he really did mean something more than a working relationship to the tough former Marine. He'd already lost his heart and soul to him so quickly, it was all still so mind-boggling to him, keeping him off balance, awash in happy thoughts one minute; deluged with powerfully sad ones the next; all of them making perfect sense as they paraded through his mind in an endless mixed up parade.
Tim doubted that Gibbs really did want Tim, deep down where he'd have become comfortable with it. Why would such a strong, confident and beautiful man need a damaged, less than Marine tough, younger man like Tim? Oh, there was no doubt that he felt bonded to Gibbs in one of the most special ways possible now, even with just those few minutes between them. The question was, did it really mean as much to Gibbs as the man believed it did last night?
The more he looked back over what had taken place between them, the more afraid he became. Did Gibbs really care about him this way? Or was that voice in his head right about Tim never being good enough for the older man and Gibbs had just said and done all that to make sure Tim got home safe and stayed there?
He had to get away. He desperately needed to try and sort out his emotions and get his head on straight, but he had nowhere to go. Or did he?
"Wanna be here for you."
"We'll talk about this again when you're ready."
Shuddering with a ripple of desire as Gibbs' voice replayed over in his head, Tim picked up his keys and his wallet, also pocketing his phone before he let himself out of the apartment, being careful to lock it up behind him. Right before he turned to the hallway, he stopped short and opened his door back up. Looking around, he noticed small tell-tale signs that his teammates had been here snooping around. Things had been moved that he knew for a fact he hadn't touched in months and with that knowledge came a flare of anger at their invasion of his private life. Making a mental note to add more locks to his door before the weekend was out, Tim headed out, intent on taking this confusion and need for clarification right where it belonged; on the doorstep of the only person he needed to talk to.
***NCIS***
Tim softly opened the front door of the house and was surprised that the door was really left unlocked. He had only been a few times and never by himself. He was surprised he even remembered the way. Every time he'd been here, it had been in the dark. His first trip here hadn't come until his fourth year on the team when Director Shepard was in trouble over "The Frog's death and that had been after dark. Looking back, Tim realized that the only other time he'd been here had been when he'd practically fallen over himself for a week straight, trying to make up to Gibbs, the fact that the boss had seriously hurt his shoulder protecting Tim from that maniac driver on that one case they worked together while Tony and Ziva were on their way back from working their end of the case in London.
Shaking his head to clear his thoughts of ancient history, he hesitantly went inside. Tim wasn't even sure the boss was home since he hadn't noticed the car or the truck in the driveway and he wasn't even sure he'd be welcomed right now. He was operating on hope that Gibbs had meant what he'd said about them talking more about things when Tim was ready, because Tim felt ready now.
Softly, he slowly walked through to the basement since it was a well-known inside joke that Gibbs lived there and besides, it was the only place in the house, Tim had ever been. The wooden steps creaked slightly under his feet, stopping his heart for a moment in the fear that Gibbs would react badly to an unexpected visitor. After a moment of complete silence, he realized the man was probably not home, just as he'd suspected. A quick visual sweep of the basement confirmed that suspicion.
Tim had come looking for something he had been destined not to find.
***NCIS***
"Hey, Duck. What brings ya?" Gibbs asked of his long-time friend as the elder man decended Gibbs' basement steps extremely late in the evening. Something had to really be wrong somewhere for this to happen.
"Hello, Jethro. I thought you and I were due for a chance to catch up." Ducky offered quietly.
"Uh-huh. What'd I do this time?" the younger man asked knowingly.
"Actually, Jethro, I came in hopes of finding out if you've been able to get Timothy to open up to you."
"About what exactly?"
"Why, about what's been troubling him for these past few weeks, of course. Have you spoken with him at all about it?"
Gibbs breathed out a sigh as he put the utlity knife he'd been using on a broken knob, down and glanced at his watch. "Yeah, Duck, I did. About 24 hours ago, as a matter of fact."
"Jethro, it's nearly eleven in the evening. You spoke with Timothy at this time last evening?"
"Yup. Ran into him out and about. We talked."
Ducky looked meaningfully at his friend. " I sense from your tone and your shorter than usual answers that this means your definition of 'out and about' led you to cross paths with the young man somewhere that most likely became a most surprising revelation to you."
"Not gonna ask how you knew. "
"If you hurt him because of what's been troubling him, Jethro..." The M.E. warned
"For cryin' out loud, Ducky! Why the hell would I do that?" Gibbs exploded. "You really think I'm that much of a bastard?"
"No, of course not, I'm simply concerned for Timothy. This is all so foreign to him. Please tell me you were able to help him in some way."
"I did what I could, Duck. He knows where to find me if he wants to talk. I reminded him as much."
"I take it he has not come to talk since last night?"
"Nope."
"I see. You will let me know if I can be of any help to either of you, won't you?"
"Just what do you think happened between us, Duck?" Gibbs' eyebrows marched up to his hairline.
"It matters not what I think happened. What matters is what Timothy believes happened; if anything. I do not believe either of us wish to see that young man hurt."
"You're right about that, Duck. Don't worry, he knows he's not alone while he sorts things out."
"Oh? I would have imagined you would have helped him already sort things out when you spoke to him last night, Jethro? You did say the two of you managed to talk."
"Yeah, we talked. It's gonna take time. I can't work it out for him and things like this just don't work out in your head overnight."
"No, I suppose you're right about that, Jethro. But, then again, Timothy has been trying to sort this out for well over two weeks now hasn't he?" The M.E. reminded him.
"Yeah. I know. Still not gonna push him, Duck."
"As well you shouldn't. Jethro. I merely wished to remind you that this has not just come about over-night."
"I know. I'll keep an eye on him, Duck."
"Thank you, my friend. Do have a good night, won't you?" Ducky turned around and without any further discussion, headed back up the stairs.
"Hey, Duck!" Gibbs hollered up to his retreating friend.
"Yes?" The M.E. stopped and turned back to look down at his friend.
"He tell you this was about me?"
"No, Jethro. He did not. Timothy refused to speak of who it was this was about, fearing what would be lost if he, as he put it, jinxed it by speaking that person's name. His express wish was that if he could only have what his dreams were letting him keep; then they are better than nothing at all."
"Crap. Then how..?"
"Jethro, my friend, I had only to look into that young man's eyes as he spoke of the dreams that were keeping him awake and his hopes that he not lose those dreams since he could never have the reality, to know he was speaking of you. That young man has thought deeply of you for a long time now. He has just never been able to allow himself to admit it until now; to either himself or to you."
"Hmm." Gibbs answered non-commitedly.
"Good night, Jethro."
"Nite, Duck. "
Listening to his friend's soft tread overhead as the older man walked back through the house and left out through the front door, Gibbs sighed in frustration. He'd thought about this all day today. Even as he'd been elbow deep in Habitat for Humanity grunt work, his mind had strayed to the events of last night, keeping him not only half aroused, but concerned for his youngest agent as well. All day long, he'd been hoping like hell the young man would be here waiting to talk to him when he'd finally managed to break free and call it a night, getting home two hours ago. It had been like a physical blow seeing the empty driveway and realizing Tim obviously wasn't ready to talk to him.
Gibbs had to admit, he was confused. He'd actually thought, after the intensity that Tim had welcomed the idea of a relationship with him, that the young man wouldn't be able to stay away; figured he'd be here at the crack of dawn actually. Gibbs frowned. Had he really misread Tim last night? Why wasn't he here wanting to talk about where things could go between them from here? Suddenly, Ducky's words from the other day came back to him now:
"Our young man knows my address as well as he does yours and I am pained to say, that information is sketchy at best."
I doubt very seriously that if asked at this time, where you reside, he would be able to recall such information."
Taking a deep breath, Gibbs slowly let it out. He couldn't believe he hadn't followed up on that problem when he'd had the chance. Finding Tim at the bar had seriously scattered what he'd had on his mind to talk to the young man about since the need to help Tim through what was bothering him had become more important in that moment and for the remainder of the night.
He'd take care of talking to Tim tomorrow. He wanted to make sure he was alright, anyway. Right now it was too late and the young man was most likely already asleep. After the rough last couple of weeks for them all, he wasn't about to get in the way of their chance to catch up sleep.
****NCIS****
Sunday morning dawned bright, clear and warm, tossing Tim from his lush wet dream with its' unrelenting glare through his living room window. With Gibbs fresh on his mind, in the most physical sense possible, Tim's shower was a steady sauna of heat and massage that worked just the right amount of contact enough to let Tim find genuine relief and be able to screw his head back on straight and move on with his day.
Now dressed and done taking in a quick breakfast of an omelette with a healthy glass of orange juice to wash it down, he was ready to go. But, go where? He'd tried to go to Gibbs' and talk to him yesterday. That hadn't worked out. All that had done was send him off to the video rental store far enough away from where Tony lived that he had no worries that the older man would find him there. Thirty minutes later had found him headed home with a front seat full of movies to watch and learn from. It had been a long night of enlightenment and stimulation; moreso than he'd ever thought possible for him on this new road of discovery.
Oddly enough, one thing that stood out from the night of adult movies was the point that Tim was prone to quickly becoming over-stimulated to the point of being in pain. That would not make for a very lasting night with any partner. All of his previous relationships had been ones where he'd been focused on fulfilling the needs of his girlfriend at the time. Never had he ever had a relationship where his needs or even what made him feel good had been the focus in the bedroom. He'd had absolutely no experience with any of the self control he'd seen in these adult movies. Common sense told him it would be a vital part of keeping the other person in the relationship equally that realization hit him, it drove home the point he'd been trying to make with himself about being someone's sub. The need to learn control and discipline over his own libido wasn't something he trusted himself to be able to do.
He doubted very seriously that it was something Gibbs had the patience for. Tim wouldn't do that to him. Gibbs deserved better than Tim; better than what Tim had to offer: which brought him back to the research he'd started reading into several nights ago, before he'd backpeddeled and gone to the gay bar to learn whatever he could from afar. Any way he looked at it; he was not good enough for Gibbs and he would not make a very good partner in a relationship where he was thought of as equal because he clearly wasn't equal; to anyone.
With Gibbs' house in sight, Tim's stomach dropped. He turned the car around and drove back home; stopping off at a local park, needing to stop and think for a while. He couldn't afford to mess this up. There was too much riding on this and his job and his working relationship with Gibbs and the others meant too much to him to let this screw it up for any of them. Even more importantly, he couldn't bring himself to put Gibbs through the pain of trying to make a relationship work that was destined to fail before it even began
