My eyes didn't open slowly, to look at Draco smirking, then to look down slowly, look up slowly again, do a few double takes and then freak out. I just snapped my eyes open right away, pulled my legs up and wrapped my arms around me.
"Oh come on, don't spoil it! I was enjoying what I was seeing there!" he complained, half jokingly. I replied stiffly (Hahahahahahahhahaha NO) "Well, if you'd told me beforehand then I wouldn't mind!"
"You should've noticed there were no bubbles in the first place!" he pointed out.
I didn't reply to this. "You were…enjoying it?" I asked sarcastically. "Where were your hands?"
"Are you suggesting that-"
"Yes, yes I am." I said curtly, tipping in some bubble bath.
"Well, I wasn't doing that." He confirmed. He had a calm look on his face, of course. I bobbed down.
My fingers were still bloody numb. I hissed in irritation and flexed them. He sighed. "Come here."
I swam over and let him roll up his sleeves and smother me in soap. I closed my eyes as I leaned my back against the back of the giant bath so he couldn't…er…see anything. Not very much anyway. It was just a gentle touch here, a rinse there.
He allowed me to dry myself as my fingers were flexible enough by then, and I pulled on a denim skirt, tights and a top as the room changed helpfully. I had a think and then slipped a very nice dress over the bed.
"What do you want, Draco?" I asked as he eyed me.
"Wild sex and vodka on tap."
"Sorry, none of that. Got some chocolate buttons and apple juice though." I said casually, looking at a table.
"Is that your dress for tonight?"
"No, I drape expensive evening dresses on my bed for no reason whatsoever all the time."
"Sarcasm becomes you, Granger."
"Non-existence becomes you, Malfoy." I retorted.
"Oh, it's Malfoy again?"
"It goes back and forth in concurrence with my level of tolerance." I said smoothly, stroking the dress.
"What about when I do this?"
"Your 'charming' smile does nothing to me, Draco. Go find Pansy."
"Draco..." he said smugly.
"Malfoy."
"You can't change it after you've said it."
"Just did."
"... Just one kiss!"
"No! Christ, Malfoy, I thought we'd put that to bed." I sighed, wanting to just get on with this stupid Christmas Eve ball or something in the hall.
"I'd rather you put me to bed."
"Only if you co-operate with where I place the pillows."
"Where is that?"
"Over your mouth and nose."
"Couldn't you place yourself over my mouth and nose?"
"I'm not a pillow."
"You could be my pillow. Your stomach looks lovely and soft."
"... I'm about to hex you... Wait, are you saying I have a fat stomach?! Because that is not a safe thing to say to a woman who is about to don a tight dress and walk into a crowded ballroom full of Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs with their perfect-looking spouses and—"
"Granger. I said nothing about fat. I said soft. Flat and soft." I stayed quiet.
"Granger?"
"What?"
"I really did mean your stomach looks soft in a good way."
"Whatever. Can you pass me that — Oi! Hands off my stomach!"
"I'm just proving that I was telling the truth!"
"Well, that's pointless; I can't feel what your hand feels!"
"But I can! And that's what matters!"
"Stop grinning. Pass me that brush."
"Useless with that hair. Ow! I meant it's too difficult for you to do yourself. Let me."
"I can do it just fine. I bet you don't even know how to use a brush. It's terribly Muggle."
"I thought we'd been through this—"
"Not the best start." I said, thinking about how we'd argued.
"But a start. Come on, turn around, I'll brush out your hair."
"... Eee! That tickles!"
"You love it – shall I blow on your neck as well?"
"Right, give me that brush and sod off out of my room! Go into that one!"
"No."
"Yes."
"No, I've not finished my chocolate buttons. Or seducing you."
"You'll be waiting a long time. And some of that time, I won't even be here. I have to leave in fifteen minutes. We both do."
"There's a lot that can be done in fifteen minutes if you're willing to bend over—"
"You are disgusting. And fifteen minutes is not much to boast about for a self-professed 'stallion', by the way. Oh hell! Fifteen minutes! Men have it easy when it comes to dressing up. I have to do my make-up and my hair, and... Oh, shite, I have to charm the run out of those tights. And I forgot to rehearse that hair charm! Shit! And—"
"Granger, calm down, you could put that dress on now and go just as you are, and you'd be perfect. Here, give me the brush, and I'll do your hair while you do the charm on your tights. I can help you put them on if you—"
"No."
"Your loss. So... who are you going with?"
"McLaggen."
"Oh, yes, him. Your one and only."
"He is not my one and only."
"Oh, please."
"Why shouldn't we? He's erm….funny, and I'll be getting my fill of champagne."
"I bet you are getting your... fill."
"You have the most revolting capacity for filthy euphemisms I have ever come across."
"I could come acr—"
"Malfoy!"
"I love that frown when you've got your hands on your hips at the same time. Of course, the frown being visible is imperative to its effectiveness, so it rather loses some of its effect when you have your back to me. And, of course, I'd rather my hands were on your hips instead of yours. There, your hair is brushed."
"Yeah, but your hand is still in it."
"Yeah..."
"Draco..."
"Just one, Hermione..."
"One kiss."
"Is that an acquiescent silence?"
"Draco, I..." I stopped. This was all too surreal. Sometimes I couldn't help snapping back into everyday Hermione.
"So I'm Draco at the moment... Well, that's something at least."
"... I- SHITE!"
"Aw, merde, Granger! My ears!"
"Ten minutes left! Oh, and I haven't done all my make-up!"
"Here, I know a charm."
"No, wait! I... wow... that's amazing. Where the hell did you learn a make-up charm? Is there something you haven't told me? You're not Draco Malfoy, Slytherin slash boyfriend, but man slash woman instead are you?" I said wittily.
"I had to be able to get Pansy presentable quickly when the prefects were patrolling, and she and I were in an alcove fu—"
"I get it! Too much information."
"Jealous?"
"Revolted."
"Jealous, then."
"Hand me my shoes."
"Sit down on your bed."
"I'm not shagging you, Draco. Malfoy." I said firmly.
"Well, Hermione. Granger. I was about to put your shoes on for you."
"I need to put my dress on first."
"Go ahead."
"Turn around and close your eyes while I take my skirt off."
"I'll close my eyes and not turn around."
"Fine. But you peek, you die. And the chocolate buttons get it."
"I wish I could get it."
"Stop doing that perverted growling sound."
"You're only afraid that you'll jump me if I keep doing it. Alright, my eyes are closed... ohhhh... Granger, do girls not realise how much that move drives men crazy?"
"What move?"
"The Two-Shake Hip Shimmy."
"The what? MALFOY! I told you to keep your eyes shut! Turn around!"
"Alright, alright! Nice knickers though. Is that black lace?"
"Yes. Like you mentioned before. Lace you should not have seen. You're a perver—"
"Lace! Black lace!"
"Yes. Ahem. My, er... other knickers are in the wash... Why am I explaining myself to you! Get out!"
"No need, I've seen everything now. I'd rather touch everything, but even I have boundaries. Unless you give me permission..."
"No!"
"... That dress is beautiful... you are. Beautiful, I mean. Hermione."
"... Thanks. Draco, what are you doing?"
"The back of your necklace is snagged in your hair."
"Ow."
"Sorry, but its right at the back of your neck."
"Draco..."
"What?"
"Nothing."
"Am I too close?"
"Well, seeing as you un-snagged the necklace, it's inexplicable why you are currently standing four inches from my face. Why are you looking at me like that?"
"You know why, Granger."
"Draco... don't look at me like that."
"Why not?"
"Draco..."
"You would only be so uncomfortable with me looking at you like this if you had something to hide."
"That is absolute rubbish—"
"And yet, you haven't noticed you're five minutes late. And you haven't moved away. And you keep calling me Draco."
"I haven't time for this. I have to go—Draco! Take your arm away from my waist! If someone sees-"
"One kiss."
"I'm no one's conquest, Malfoy. I have no interest in being your thrill at the end of a chase." I joked; he still knew I liked him.
"I have no interest in you being my thrill at the end of a chase. I have an interest in you being my many, many thrills at the end of a very long chase. Five years, Granger. Five years hasn't convinced you?"
"The euphemisms, looking at me in the bath… it's certainly hard to resist that."
"Hermione... your cheeks are so soft... facial cheeks obviously."
"See? Constant euphemi—mmmf... Mmm..."
"... Gods... Granger... that was... worth waiting for. When was the last time we kissed?"
"Draco..."
"Mmm."
"You have your serious face on. It's unnerving."
"I'm busy."
"Doing what?"
"I'm late."
"But all we did was kiss!"
"For the ball. Harry will be waiting."
"Right, that's it; I'm not waiting if you're going out with McLaggen tonight."
"Mmmf! Mmm..."
"Keep that kiss in mind when you're dancing with him tonight. I'll be in here waiting for my next. Off you go."
"Oof!"
"Doorway is a few inches to your left there, Granger."
"Right. Door. Yeah... oof!"
"Another inch to the left, Granger."
"Oh... ha! Of course. I... Goodnight, Draco." I smiled, and I left.
