I did change the fight between Severus and James at the end of their O.W.L.s so here's that quick little warning. I am holding off on any real intimacy between Remus and Vermilliah because they're still kind of young for me to feel comfortable writing some touchy feeling things going on between them. For this, I am sorry. It will all come into play soon enough.
WitchWolf6470
DISCLAIMER: I only own Vermilliah. Unfortunately.
Chapter 8: Fifth Year Ends
Natalie did not return to school until the end of January, and I was too busy trying to avoid James to tell her I was sorry for her loss. Of course I doubt she noticed anyway, as so many people were walking up to her that she had never even met to give their condolences she seemed to always be in a daze and trying to figure out who it was even talking to her. Lily was spending some time with her the first few days, so it was easy for me to slip in and out of class before any of the Marauders could catch me.
James was insisting I play on the team now that one of his chasers, Lance, was ill. I sometimes would go watch practice but never participated- as Lily had told me there was too much to worry about studying to play silly sports. Of course I wanted to. I loved the aching and the deep sleeps that came with training alone. I had been sleeping terribly since everyone had returned, and part of me wished I could go crawl into bed with Remus. It seemed like he was being stand-offish to me the past few weeks though, so I decided to avoid him for the time being.
I couldn't run forever, I had been going to the kitchens for meals but it's not like they didn't know exactly where I was after a few days of me not eating at all in the dining hall. James and Sirius snuck up on me as I sat at a little table with a few house elves one Saturday morning. I was just offering one of the elves the rest of my biscuit when James grabbed my shoulders.
"Don't let her get away, Padfoot!" James yelled as I yelled, my cheeks flushing as Sirius grabbed my wand hand and forced it onto the table. The house elves scrambled and hid away from the raucous.
"We've got you now!" Sirius smirked and pushed my plate off the table, sitting right on it in front of me and holding my hands still. "You will listen to us!"
"I'm not playing." I hissed, letting them hold me down because I knew fighting was useless.
"We aren't playing either! We seriously need you!"
"Yes. Siriusly." Sirius flashed a toothy grin as me and I glared daggers at him. "Who showed you the kitchens anyway? We've never seen anyone else down here…"Obviously Remus felt it wasn't worth mentioning how much time we had spent together to his friends either.
"Could you bring me a tea please?" I asked a house elf that had been peeking around a corner at us, who ran off immediately at my request. It was only a few moments before a platter was placed beside Sirius with three cups and a pot of tea. "Do you mind? You've got my wand so there really is no need to hold me down."
They had a passing glance at each other before sitting down. James poured the cups of tea and I stirred three cubes of sugar into my own with a splash of milk. They were babbling about why they needed me- the backups were awful, which of course I knew already. I partially tuned them out, trying to think of a way to get them off my back without playing.
"Hm…" I hummed, sipping from my tea and staring over at a massive fireplace where a few of the house elves were stirring a giant black kettle. "I tell you what." I set the empty cup down and looked to James. "If you two can get Lily to agree to let me play, I'll play."
Sirius started to reject the idea, but I was staring intently at James, daring him to even try. I knew she would never say yes- not to him. I watched him patiently, smirking at his torn expression. After a few minutes of contemplation I seen a plan formulating behind those striking dark eyes.
"You've got yourself a deal." James stated, standing and motioning Sirius to follow.
"Can I have my wand back please?" I asked Sirius and watched him place it down on the table in front of me. "Thank you. I don't wish you any luck at all." I smiled, and after they left I gave myself a few moments before heading out to find Lily and warn her about my little deal.
A few weeks past and there was no sign of James asking Lily at all and we were both a little disappointed that she had no reason to hex him, but also pleased that it seemed to be over. There was a Quidditch game approaching at the end of February in only another week and a half, so I just assumed he had found someone new for the position.
That is… until one day. Until one day Remus needed some 'notes' and we were foolish enough to follow him upstairs to Gryffindor tower. I knew James' plan the moment I looked up from passing through the portrait hole.
"No!" I whipped around at Remus. The one thing that could possibly work and Remus helped him! "You. Arse!" I hit his arm with each word. "I. Can't. Believe. You!"
The whole common room was covered wall to wall with hearts of all sizes in pinks and reds- the floor was covered in rose petals of the same mixture- and in the middle of a flurry of floating hearts stood James, in dress robes, with a large teddy bear under one arm and a card held out towards Lily, who was standing frozen in complete shock staring at him.
"Lily hex him!" I nudged her, but at that moment Sirius jumped out with a little make shift bow and arrow and hit her with an arrow the exploded into another flurry of hearts.
"Lily- Will you be my Valentine?" James grinned, and I glared over at Sirius.
"Cupid? Really?" I was a little happy about the whole situation- but irritated at the same time.
"Now Lily, I just want you to know. You don't have to say yes. But if you say no. Vee has to play Quidditch next game." James made his way to Lily, who quickly came to her senses and pulled out her wand, pointing it straight at his face.
"She doesn't have to do anything." Lily snapped and I stuck my tongue out at him in triumph.
"Oh? There won't be a moment up until that game that I don't see you and profess my undying love. If you don't think that's so bad I just want you to know this-" he motioned to the room behind him. "Took ten minutes. Every class… Every day… Every moment. I will be there."
It was scary the look he was giving her, and Sirius was now shooting Peter repeatedly with the little arrows. Lily glanced at me and I knew it was all over. How had I not foreseen this? I did myself a favor and pushed her out of the way and smacked James so hard my hand stung.
"That's was for Lily!" I glared. "When's practice?"
I found myself awake bright and early that Saturday. I wasn't mad about the situation, maybe a little that he had won and I expected him not to. I really did love flying though, and it was still very cold and snowing. My lungs hated me by lunch, but on the brighter side I had been acquainted with the new members on the team since the previous year. There was a sixth year Chaser this year that had taken place of the seventh that had left last year whose name was Brian, and a burly beater named Eric. Brian took time to ask me questions and learn my moves to better coordinate with me.
The sleep was amazing. Dreamless sleep that I actually woke up feeling rejuvenated after. Lily had taken to trying to mend her feelings towards Severus and therefore was mostly in the library with him the full week I was at practice. We didn't see much of each other and I could tell that she felt bad for what she seen as letting me down. I was kind of thankful in the end to be a little more active and not just sitting around taking notes all day long. During the week leading up the match with Lily busy, Brian took to sitting with me and the Marauders every night. We discussed strategy mostly between the two of us and maybe James, because Sirius had a girlfriend and Remus seemed sulky and poor Peter… well he didn't know much and was mostly just a fan of watching it.
"So the game's tomorrow. I think we've got this in the bag now with this girl." Brian had commented. I rolled my eyes, and stabbed at some chicken on my plate. Brian was a tall, lanky seventeen year old, with average features and blonde hair. He had a crooked smile I found kind of cute, but I really had no interest in being more than his friend. (As I told Lily begrudgingly when she asked me about him.)
"Well don't get used to it. James only has me this game. Then it's back to… studying every day." I was put out and I knew it was obvious. "That doesn't mean I want to play!" I added quickly.
"I think you're better than Grottsberg." Brian offered, and I shrugged, looking over at Sirius and the girl attached to his side. I was a little put-off by their mouths being one for so long. Professor McGonagall had already disrupted them twice when she walked up and hit Sirius in the back of the head.
"One more time and its detention. Miss Kinley. I suggest you find yourself back to Ravenclaw table now." The strict looking woman stood firm until the girl had scurried off to her own table.
"Grottsberg was doing fine anyway." I commented, bringing back the conversation as McGonagall made her way back up to the teachers table. "I love playing, perhaps next year will be more convenient."
"You should stay. Only two more games after this and we're guaranteed to win with you in the game." Brian complimented me and I only managed a shrugged.
"Maybe."
"So you'll let him talk you into staying but not me!? I thought you loved me!?" James hit the table with his fist in mock-anger and I laughed at him.
"Shut up James. I would say anything to get you guys off my back. I think you all just fancy having a girl on the team to poke fun at during practice."
"I wouldn't poke fun at the girl that is half a lap ahead of me." Sirius said, joining the conversation with his counterpart finally being absent.
"I'm faster than you all, yes. But stronger? Uh. No." I flexed my arms and they all started laughing. "Oh definitely stronger, too." I nodded.
"I guess I'll see you guys tomorrow morning at breakfast, I'm going to head upstairs to take a nice long shower." I announced and stood to stretched out my sore muscles, whining a little as I did so.
"I'll walk with you." Brian decided and got up as well, I shrugged.
"Bye guys." I yawned, and started down the aisle.
Brian was talking animatedly the entire time up the stairs, but I was too tired for input. As soon as we entered the common room I bid him farewell and headed towards the door that lead up to the girls dormitories.
"Oh Vee!" I turned around and seen Lily sitting by the fire in one of the giant comfortable chairs, and made my way over to her instead.
"Hey Lil'. What are you up to? Defense, eh? I'm curious as to if I should get onto you about that not being for our class or not like you would do to me." I smiled, half amused, half exhausted.
"Oh hush. There can be exceptions. You look tired." She told me, laying her head back against the arm of the chair she sat sideways in and looking up at me. Her hair was so long at this point it just barely touched the ground.
"I'm about to shower. You need a haircut." I leaned against the back of the chair, looking over at the fire. "I wouldn't be this sore if I had just gotten back on the team to begin with."
"Yeah… but this year is a changing point in our futures. I know N.E.W.T.s are much harder… but I feel like O.W.L.s are more important. Our Career Advice meetings are next week with McGonagall. If we get good O.W.L.s we won't have to worry about becoming a maid!"
"That's a little drastic. You'll do better than everyone that studies twice as hard because you have natural talent and a thirst for knowledge. Now if you'll excuse me." I turned, murmuring a pitiful goodbye and heading back for the door.
"Vee!" I groaned, turning to find Sirius about an inch from my face. I glared.
"What?"
"I don't think it is good mojo for you to have a crush on another team mate." I raised my eyebrows at him the accusation.
"I have a crush on someone? This would be news to me."
"If you don't then he does." Sirius glanced around to make sure no one was listening. "I think you're making Remus jealous."
I laughed at him, and turned to open the door and walk away but he grabbed my wrist.
"WHAT!?" I yanked my wrist out of his grasp and stared at him angrily. "I don't like anyone. If Remus thinks he has some sort of claim to me when he has barely spoken to me since Christmas Break, then he is delusional. I don't like Brian as anything more than a friend. But thank you. I've just made up my mind about staying on the team the rest of the season. In the words of my lovely best friend. Bite. Me."
"What happened over-" He began, but I slammed the door in his face on my way up the stairs and before I knew it I had passed out on my bed without a shower or change of clothes.
The next morning I showered just to warm up from the chill of morning. I had a piece of toast at breakfast and as soon as Sirius and Remus sat down I stood up and walked out. I was still a little irritated. It was like the more I was around any males the more aggressive I became. I couldn't possibly explain the anger building up inside of me.
I stayed in the girl's locker room until the start of the game and got yelled at twice for penalties against an opposing player. I gave Brian a bloody nose from a spike that happened to hit him square in the face. After a two hour game and being up 230 to 100 our seeker caught the snitch and hit the cold hard ground.
I ignored the team cheers and went straight into the locker room for another shower without speaking to anyone. I felt like everything was being released in the heat of the game, and now the steam of the shower filled the whole locker room and I really didn't want to leave. I pulled my wet hair to the side and braided it so it wasn't laying against the back of my neck on the walk back up to the castle.
"Hullo" I turned to find James had been waiting leaned outside the door.
"Hello."
"You seem less angry." He commented. I shrugged, and started walking up to the castle. He followed, tucking his hands away in his pockets.
"I'll do it." I told him as we reached the front doors.
"What?"
"I'll stay on the team. I can't promise without penalties."
"You made up for your penalties."
"Good then." So I left him there and headed up to take a nap before dinner.
"Guess whose Birthday is coming up?" James face appeared over the edge of my book.
"Remus'" I said, closing the book on his nose.
"Yes but- guess who else's?" He grinned.
"Professor Slughorn."
"ME!"
"What do you want?" I sighed, and stretched out over the couch so there was no room for him to sit.
"Aw you don't have to get me anything."
"Okay I won't."
"You can if you want."
"Well I don't particularly want to. If I had to choose between getting you or Remus a present, I would get Remus one and you none." I nodded seriously, and he pushed my legs off the couch.
"That's not very nice. What are you getting Remus?"
"You don't know?" I asked.
"No tell me!"
"Well I don't know either."
"I'm sure he would be happy with a good ol' snog."
"Snog… That's kissing right? You all... Remus and I have already kissed. You can't give someone the same present twice."
"You have!?"
"Is THAT what happened over Christmas Break?" Sirius asked as he came out of nowhere, sitting down on my stomach.
"No. We kissed ages ago. When you asked me out on a date and I said yes not knowing it was a date. That day." I told them.
"You wouldn't kiss me but you went and kissed Remus?" He looked down at me in disbelief.
"Yes."
"That's all you have to say? These are the lips of an angel." He puckered his lips up.
"I'm thinking more along the lines those are the lips of a succubus. They've been everywhere. They'll go anywhere." I tried to push him off of me because it was most definitely not a comfortable position.
"So what happened over Christmas Break? I feel left out." James peeked over at me around his friend.
"Well, don't. Nothing happened. We just hung out." I told them, and squirmed. "Get off you fattie!"
"I am NOT fat!" Sirius fell on the floor as James pushed him, and faked an injury.
"Sissy." I laughed at him.
"Anyway!" James interjected, and we decided it best to ignore the awful whining coming from the floor. "We're having a joint little party to relax before the exam rush to study kicks in. Can you get Lily to come?"
"So. You're not inviting me, you're asking me to invite someone for you?" I asked, throwing my legs over his lap.
"No! Of course you're invited! Lily wouldn't come without you!" He said quickly.
"Oh I see. That makes it much better then." I told him lamely.
"Well 'm sure Remus would like a birthday kiss too, and seeing as apparently you already snogged him… well you can do it again."
"It was literally a peck James, I am sure you can find someone to give him a birthday kiss that he isn't avoiding. By the way I hope you aren't expecting a birthday kiss from Lily,"
"Remus avoid you?" Sirius sat up and looked at me. "Why?"
"You've got me. Literally walked out of the common room yesterday when I entered." It was true, I was a little hurt at the lack of any contact between us the past few months. I had assumed after Christmas Break we would be closer, not further apart.
"That boy has issues." Sirius commented, falling back dramatically on the floor. "I think he's getting his Career Advice right now."
"Isn't it great that Transfiguration was canceled so McGonagall could give us Career counseling?" James sighed happily, and then looked back to me. "So are you coming or not?"
"Sure."
"With Lily?" He leaned over towards me with his eyebrows raised.
"I'll ask. It'll be amusing to watch her practice that new jinx on you." I told him as I sat up, kicking at Sirius to move so I could stand. "My appointment is in 10 so I'll see you guys later. When's the party exactly?"
"This Saturday."
"Okay so don't bother me for the next two days then."
"Yes, Ma'am!" They both shouted and saluted me as I made my way towards the portrait hole.
"So you're telling me you have no idea what you want to do?" Professor McGonagall stared over the edge of her glasses at me sternly.
"I'm not sure what would benefit what I'm supposed to be doing. Anyway, after the war I'll be returning home." I told her.
"Indeed. Nothing is for certain in these times though, remember that. If you're so worried about the war maybe you should find a spot in the Ministry of Magic." I took the pamphlets offered to me. "If you have any questions feel free to come ask me. I would love to advise you but from your marks it seems you will have no problems with your O.W.L.s and have at least a little time to figure it out. I'm not entirely sure of your situation, but I assume it's a tad more complicated than you knowing what job you want."
"Thanks, Professor."
Lily was after me, and I wished her luck and went on my way. I sat with her in the library as we wasted some time talking about our advice before dinner, and I decided it was better to just ask her about James' party now rather than later.
"So… I was talking to James earlier…" Her face became straight and unsure as soon as his name left my lips. "Well see, it's Remus' birthday this coming week." She visibly relaxed. Going with the Remus part then.
"They're throwing him a party- James too but only because it's at the end of the month! I thought we could go for Remus, and please don't make me go alone. I would never make you go to a party alone! I've never even been to a party." I begged her. I was relieved when she gave in easily, and thanked her over and over again.
"Is there going to be alcohol?" She asked me after we started packing our bags to head down to dinner.
"I'm not sure. Why?"
"Because if James is around I'm going to need a drink." We laughed our way out of the library, followed by the glare of the mean old librarian.
Saturday seemed to come too fast. It was the ninth, and Remus' birthday was the following day. We still hadn't spoken but I decided I would talk to him tonight when I gave him his present. Lily braided my hair and twirled it into a fancy bun before pulling her own hair up into a simple ponytail where she tied her hair up with her own hair- I didn't know how she did it, but I liked the effect it had. I borrowed a pair of her jeans and pulled on a pair of slip on black shoes I had only worn a few times since I had bought them last summer. I was rummaging through my trunk looking for a school shirt that wasn't wrinkled in only my bra when Lily threw a light green tank top over to me. I pulled it on and she wore similar jeans and a V-necked black tee.
I was kind of excited that there would, indeed, be alcohol involved. The other three girls from our dorm wanted Lily to do their hair as well, and we decided since we hadn't hung out together as a group lately we would go down together.
I knew when we arrived downstairs that the night would be interesting. I had advised James to be as little annoying as possible and stay away from Lily until she had a few drinks in her. I was surprised to find that Lily had actually been to a few parties over the last summer and learned the joys of a few adult beverages to calm the nerves. I decided that if anyone needed to wind down, it was her.
Sirius was at a table adorned with drinks I could only assume the seventh years had bought because of the amount there was. Brian confirmed my suspicions by commenting on how I need to thank him for there being so many 'booze' as he put it. I asked for a two shot of Fire Whiskey while Lily sipped on some Elven Wine. It smelled of the brewery at home, and so I decided it best to keep away from emotional memories. I picked up both of the shots and took them with me as music started to play fairly loud, leaving Lily and the girls to find James and wish him a happy birthday.
"Silencing Charms!" He was yelling to a fourth year over the noise of the party. "McGonagall will never know!"
"Hi James." I patted him nudged him with my elbow and handed him one of the shots. "Happy birthday!" After downing the fiery amber liquid I pulled a box out and held it out for him to take.
"You did get me something!" He was already well past tipsy, and stumbled over to hug me and lead me away from the group of younger students he had been talking to. "Aw!" He pulled the box open and I helped him pin the silver stag to his collar.
"Prongs." I laughed at the nickname I had noticed his friends calling him as of lately. He flashed me a grin and looked around. "Where's Lily?"
"I think you should wait for her to come to you. She will at least have to say happy birthday." I told him, and lead him over to the table to get another drink. "I'll catch you later James, I'm going to try to find Remus."
I put the shot glass I had used down on the table to be refilled and took it with me, waving at Lily as I passed her and skimming the room to find the other birthday boy. The light was very dim, the only extra light was coming from a few candles lit and floating around the room and it made it almost impossible to make out faces on the other side of the room. All the furniture had been pushed to the sides and people were dancing in the center of the room. I tried to move through the crowd as quickly as possible, but when I made it out the other side I was cut off from my search by Brian.
"Oh Hello." I smiled up at him. He toasted his glass to mine 'To Fire Whiskey!' and I again downed the shot, punching his shoulder as he slid his arm around my waste.
"Hey!" I laughed at his clear change in behavior from the alcohol, and pulled away as he tried to lead me into the crowd of dancing teens.
"I don't want to dance. I'm looking for Remus. Have you seen him?" When he shook his head and disappeared I was off again to search for my friend, but to no avail. I found myself back at the table and taking another shot. Lily tried one with me and we had a good laugh over it because of her obvious surprise and shudder at the strength. Once she was nice and pink in the cheeks I sent her off to find James and I turned to Sirius.
"Have you seen Remus? It's his party and I can't even find him anywhere." I asked as he poured me a shot and the amber liquid splashed over the edge.
"I t'ink… he uh… wen' – up'tairs." I shook my head at his state and snatched the bottle away from him and two butterbeer to take with me. I went upstairs towards their room, passing a few of the younger students passed out in front of their doors and a pair of seventh years making out against the wall across from the fifth year boys dormitories.
I shut the door behind me with my foot and felt a biting chill come over me. Remus was sitting on the ledge next to an open window, looking outside.
"I don't really want to come down guys." He sighed without looking over at me. I tried not to laugh, as the alcohol was now clouding my head.
"I sound like a guy huh? On that note- more than one guy!" His head snapped over and he looked surprised to see me. I probably would have been too.
"Happy Birthday! Well… it's nearly here anyway" I stopped by the window and sat the bottles on his nightstand before pulling the window shut. "Aren't you freezing?" I asked, and touched his hands. He was ice cold. "How long have you been sitting there?" I leaned against the nightstand and picked up the butterbeer, twisting the tops off and handing him one.
His amber eyes were watching me curiously and I put my free hand over his. I felt hot compared to him and I leaned forward against the sill, rubbing his hands to warm him up.
"Remus?" I waved my hand in front of his face and pushed the hand holding his butterbeer up to his lips. "Drink. It will warm you up."
"I don't want to drink."
"I don't believe you." I commented, and pushed myself up on the other side of the window sill, crossing my legs and leaning over to grab the bottle of Fire Whisky. "You shouldn't be so sad on your birthday you know." I told him. "Do your little shot glass trick. I didn't bring any."
"Fine." He grumbled.
"Yeah that's right fine." I nodded as he picked his wand up and conjured the glasses. After pouring them he raised his glass and tapped it to my own before downing it. Instead of drinking my own I handed it to him as well. "You have some catching up to do mister. I only came to the damn party to see you anyway. God knows I didn't feel like breaking Lily away from tearing James' throat out. Well they're on their own for now anyway."
Remus was trying to hide a little smile at the prospect of Lily and James being left to themselves, and I sipped the butterbeer as he poured the next two shots. When he handed me one I pulled a box from my back pocket that was crushed on one corner.
"Sorry about that." I pulled out my wand and fixed it quickly, taking the glass and downing the liquid before setting it down on his knees, which were bent upward towards his chest.
"You didn't have to get me something. I didn't get you anything." He said absently as he sat down the now empty glass he held and picked up the box.
"That was last year, now just know that this October I expect a present in return." I joked lightly. "Probably alcohol as well." I added.
"Now before you think I'm crazy." I started, as he pulled the box open. "I made that. It also took me the past two days every moment of free time I had. It might seem lame now but… you know. In my culture it's custom to make someone close to you a bracelet that represents everything that you see in them." I felt like I was babbling, and I smiled widely when he pulled it on and tightened it around his wrist.
"I like it. What'd you make it out of?" He asked but I was blushing before he finished asking.
"You know… some of this… some of that. Maybe we can talk about that later though. Now we drink!" I exclaimed, and we held light conversation for the next few minutes.
"You know Remus…" I started after a moment of silence and I reached out for his hand. "Well I don't like that you haven't been talking to me. Sirius said you were jealous of Brian?" I asked, watching him closely. His smile had disappeared.
"I don't know why he would tell you that." He cleared his throat. "You haven't been talking to me either."
"Fair enough." I stuck my tongue out at him and dropped my hand from his as I leaned back and looked out the window. "But I just… you know I wanted to tell you I'm really not interested in anyone like that yet. Guess I'm behind the time because Lily…" I stopped, eyeing him. "Don't tell James I said that."
He laughed at me and I leaned forward, reaching out to touch his cheek. His eyes became intense at the touch and I examined each feature of his face closely. We weren't far apart, and I was trying to figure out how I really felt about the boy sitting with me…
"I don't like Brian like I like you." I told him, not even sure what it meant but that it was true. "Or Sirius, or James. There's something about you that's different. That's all I know." I said honestly, and trailed my fingers down his jaw line.
"I like you, too." I smiled at this, and slid off the window sill.
"Let's go down stairs eh? Enough of this serious stuff! Let's go mess up Sirius' pretty face. I'm thinking some blue eyebrows." He got a mischievous look in his eye as he followed, and I finished my butterbeer and stumbled against him at the door.
If things had lightened up I couldn't tell. Staring up at him this closely was so intense I felt like my stomach was going to explode and I tried to straighten but my muscles were frozen in the moment. Remus seemed calm, affectionately looking at me in a way that made my knees weak… I let out a shaky breath and stood up straight.
"Let's go get some cake."
The following morning I woke up with Remus' head pressed against my stomach and Lily's foot in my face. After that miserable morning of cleaning up and finding our way downstairs together to eat breakfast, a very real panic set in. Homework was piling up and I had to admit I was starting to get nervous myself. Now between Quidditch and class I felt like I had no time. I sat next to Remus every night at dinner so we wouldn't fall into avoiding each other again, and everything seemed to be going by at an accelerated rate.
Every day was class and homework and class and notes and make sure this gets taken care of and oh Remus missed class he needs extra notes and it's not swish and twirl it IS twirl and flick. The next two months zoomed by in no time and Lily was becoming increasingly agitated with each day that brought us all closer to exams week. I had started to have nightmares again- nothing clear but always with a deep seated panic I could never shake easily the next morning. I was losing sleep and it was affecting my ability to study and focus in class.
To say I was relieved that test week was only a few days away would be an understatement. I just wanted the whole school year to end and to go to the little cottage on the edge of Godric's Hollow, collapse into the plump couch, and not move for a good few weeks.
I was lounging outside in the warm breeze in my school skirt and a short sleeved button up. I was sitting on my robes with my legs stretched out and taking in the sunlight with my eyes closed when Remus and Sirius sat down on either side of me. I squinted up at them for only a moment before laying back.
"Oh it is sooo nice outside. I can't wait to take air bathes in the back yard…" I sighed, and stretched my arms above my head.
"What's an air bath?" Sirius asked, taking very close to the same stretched out position as me.
"It's when you are naked in the air. Duh. I love laying out in the sun." I draped my right arm over my eyes to block out some of the light.
"That's not completely sexy of you." Sirius barked out a laugh and I scoffed at him.
"I really don't get the whole oddness with nudity around you people. Where I was raised it's perfectly normal to see others naked." I told him.
"Oh well I want to go where you're from!" Sirius exclaimed.
"Hah. Anyway." I sighed heavily and took in the fresh air. "I'm so over this stress. Aren't you guys?" I asked, wiggling my toes inside of my socks. I had placed my shoes off to the side.
"I am" Remus agreed, and I reached out with my left hand to grab his arm. "What?"
"Lay down it's so nice!" I told him, tugging on his sleeve.
We all laid out by the lake for a good hour talking nonsense before they decided it was time to head inside. I waved them goodbye and Sirius came back after only walking about 5 yards away.
"Is it true you walk around naked?" He asked me, only receiving a glare as an answer.
"That was so EASY!" Lily let out a giant sigh of relief as we exited the castle and headed towards the lake for some fresh air. "Oh I can't believe I was so worried." She grinned over at me. "How did you do?"
"Fine. It was much easier than expected." I replied, pulling my robes off and draping them over my arm. "Now it's all over… and we can just relax."
"Oh Snivellus—How greasy are thou hair?" Lily's head shot around at this, and before I could catch her or find the source of the yelling and laughter, she was running towards a crowd of people near the lake. Or not.
I didn't run because I didn't feel like it was my place to interfere. I knew what was happening. I knew why Lily felt the need to come to her friends aid, but I couldn't bring myself to put myself into the conflict unless I felt I needed to stop someone from being harmed—and as far as I knew Severus was just as mean to James as the other way around. I slipped through the crowd and found myself standing beside a somber looking Remus and a highly amused Peter.
Severus hit the ground with a very loud thud- I winced, dropping my robes and stepping forward. Remus grabbed my wrist and made me reconsider interfering as Lily was screaming at James at the top of her lungs and Severus was already on the ground…
Severus was struggling to stand with his robes thrown over his head from being hung upside down. When his face was clear and he seen his group of Slytherin friends his face contorted in rage. His eyes shot to Lily, he was clearly humiliated and struggling to not completely snap.
"I don't need your help- Mudblood!" Snape spit out at Lily.
The silence couldn't have been thicker. Lily turned her attention to the Slytherin with complete shock written across her face, her lips slightly parted in her disbelief. Her wand slowly fell from James' face and I tried to step forward again as I saw her begin to crumble but Remus held onto my wrist. James intended to lash out and so did Sirius, Remus stepped forward as Lily turned away from the scene.
"Don't let them hurt Severus!" I whispered and took off after the flash of red hair as it disappeared into the crowd.
When I found Lily she was staring out the window of our dormitory, out toward the lake. Her eyes were dry but red and she had drying streaks on her red cheeks. I didn't say anything, but I sat on my bed close to her and waited for her to defend him.
She never did.
Lily had cut her ties to Severus Snape. Not once did I try to sway her reason either way, but not once had she asked for anyone's opinion. She walked around the last week of school with a sort of silent determination. When the Slytherin boy tried to speak to her and waited for her outside of the common room entrance, she did not hesitate to walk out and make her feelings on their no longer having a friendship extremely clear.
I partially sympathized with Severus, because I knew he was just a kid that was fascinated by what he did not know as we all had the tendency to do. I was happy that Lily had followed through with the promise to herself to not stand for discrimination. She almost seemed normal on the Hogwarts Express, but I had a feeling it was one of the things in her life that would change her understanding of anything being normal.
The train ride was abnormally quiet between us. I shared a few looks with Remus when he walked by on Prefect duties and shook my head to warn James off several times. She would feel better after the summer, but now I didn't trust her temper to not explode from his presence alone. We said quick goodbye and promised to write each other. The moment I walked through the door of my temporary home I collapsed onto the couch and took a much needed nap.
