A/N: I received a sweet review on my last chapter from guest, so whoever you are, bless you! That made my night! Thanks so much for reading!


"Levi, we're going to be late, honey."

"I just gotta pick out one thing."

Lindsay sighed and tossed her keys from one hand to the other. It wasn't like being a couple minutes late was going to harm anything, but she hated keeping people waiting. After another minute of tapping her toes she gave up and stomped into Levi's bedroom, finding the five-year old with glitter glue all over her face and scraps of paper on the floor.

"What are you doing? Levi, there's glitter all over the carpet! I told you not to use this in your room. When are you going to start listening to me?"

"But mama-"

"There's no buts. Go wash your face and get your coat on. We're late."

Levi whined and dropped her shoulders, running into the bathroom and holding back tears while Lindsay knelt down to clean up the mess as best as she could. It was probably going to take some intense work to get all the glitter out and the frustration made her so mad she could have spit.

"I'm ready to go," Levi whispered, her eyes searching the tops of her shoes. "Please don't be so upset with me?"

"Look, let's put it away for now and not think about it until later. Neither one of us needs to be in a bad mood, okay?"

"But your heart is still mad."

"Levi," Lindsay started, crouching down in front of her daughter. "Right now I am turning off the anger and the frustration. And later, when we talk about this and I try to turn that anger on again, it won't be there. We're taking a breather, okay?"

"Okay."

"C'mere and give me a hug so we can go."

Levi hesitated for just a moment, then rushed into Lindsay's arms, squeezing as hard as she could.

"I love you mama. Taller than the mountains."

"I love you bigger than the sky, sweetie."

"Can we go now?"

"Yes, we can go. Do you want to give grandma and grandpa a call on the way? They wanted to talk to you earlier."

"Yes! I would like that very much."

They left the apartment and walked down to the car where Levi climbed into her seat and buckled herself, then held her hand out for the phone.

"Want me to pass on any messages from you?"

"No thanks, I'll call grandma after you go to bed tonight."

"Okay."

She dialed the number and was soon talking to her grandparents, who were probably happy to drop everything they were doing to listen to the buzzing chatter of their only granddaughter.

"We had a great party at school today! We decorated some cookies and we made cards. I made a very beautiful one for you guys and mama will put it in the mail in the morning. It has feathers on it. And right now we're in the car because we're going to our friend Adam's house for dinner."

There was a short pause and Levi wrinkled her nose, then shook her head.

"No grandma, Adam is just a buddy, not mama's boyfriend. 'Sides, she don't got time for no one but me… I know it is Valentines day. But we always have dinner together one or two times every week and this night was the only one we could do it! So Adam is making us dinner this time, for fun. I sure hope he cooks good, come to think of it. If he doesn't then maybe he will have peanut butter and jelly in his house. Do grown ups eat that? No kids live with him. Maybe he won't have it because it's kid food. Grandma, what if he cooks bad? What are we going to do?"

Lindsay rolled her eyes, wondering how in the world her daughter had gotten so dramatic.

"I guess I will just wait until we get there to see. Maybe it will be grilled cheese and tomato soup! No one could mess that one up! I'll call you tomorrow and tell you how it goes but we're here right now so I gotta go. I love you guys!"

She ended the call and sighed to herself, waiting until the car was parked to unbuckle her seatbelt., then fiddled with the door, trying to get out.

"Levi, you need to wait for me, this is a busy street."

"What's that mean? The street ain't doing anything."

"It just means that there's a lot of cars using the street right now."

"Oh! Well come get me out then."

They made their way out of the car and into the building where Levi was delighted to be able to push the button for the elevator.

"So does Adam have like… toys for me to play with? Because you guys always talk about real boring stuff when we have dinner and I need something to do."

"I think you'll find something to do while we talk about boring stuff."

"Oh good. Maybe he will let me play some video games, he says he's got a lot of them."

"Maybe so. I need you to be on your best behavior and mind your manners, okay?"

"Okay! This might be really exciting."

"Go ahead and knock on the door."

Her little hand had barely moved from the door when it swung open and she giggled, running towards Adam and laughing when he picked her up.

"Hi buddy!" she greeted as he kissed her cheek. "Happy Valentines day."

"Happy Valentines day to you too kiddo. What's this on your nose?"

"Glitter," she answered, trying unsuccessfully to wipe it off. "Boy, something sure smells good in here. What did you make?"

"Oh just something a little fancy," he answered. She nodded then let out an ear piercing squeal and wiggled down to the ground.

"Gabby! You're here! Mama, Gabby is here!"

She jumped onto the couch next to her friend and they hugged each other for a long time, both chattering about what had happened to them since last they'd seen each other.

"Well why are you here? It's a school night!"

"My mom and dad went on a date and so I came here to spend the night," Gabby answered with a grin. "And know what else? Today is a good leg day and I can walk a little if someone walks with me. Want to see?"

Levi nodded and watched as Gabby stood up from the couch, walking a few feet until she had to sit down again.

"My legs get tired after a little while," she explained with a shrug. "But a good leg day always makes me happy. I can get around just like other kids. My chair is even all folded up way over there, see?"

Levi nodded and smiled.

"That's good that your legs are working today. I will help you walk to the table when it's dinnertime."

"Okay. Right now I am reading my homework for school. I have to read the first chapter of this book. Want me to read it to you?"

"Yeah!"

Levi sat down next to her friend and soon they were caught up in a fictional world.

"Need help with anything?" Lindsay asked, nodding into the kitchen.

"Set the table for me?"

"Sure."

She pulled the plates out of the cupboard while he finished cooking, and the girls laughter in the other room became louder and louder.

"We really need to be better about getting them together more often," Adam commented. "They seem to enjoy it a lot."

"Yeah. Their phone conversations are turning into marathons lately. I think last Friday they clocked almost an hour. I have no idea what they talk about for that long."

"What do girls talk about at that age?"

"Boys."

"No, they're much too young!"

"I started noticing boys when I was four years old and Bradley Evans pinched me in Sunday School. Believe me, they're already talking about boys."

"They're five and seven!"

"Trust me, Adam."

He groaned and went back to the stove while she laughed, shaking her head. It wasn't like either of the girls were interested in boys at this age. They were just talking about them, and probably how gross they were. It was fun to watch Adam squirm though.


"I find it quite hilarious that you have floral scented dish soap."

"Why?"

"You're a boy. You should have Dawn Original, or be taking all the dishes outside to wash them with dirt and rain water."

"Lindsay, you're really, really weird."

She chuckled and dropped a little more soap into the hot water while he gathered the dishes from the table. Levi and Gabby were sprawled out on the living room floor watching a movie and eating ice-cream, and their chatter had not yet let up. It seemed as if they had an endless supply of things to talk about and Adam was glad Gabby finally had a friend who saw past the wheelchair and the learning struggles. He'd always worried for his little cousin, that she would grow up isolated and feeling horrible about herself because of her medical struggles. But right now, he wasn't worried at all.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Yeah sure."

He hesitated for a moment, scraping the bottom of the casserole dish before sighing and turning to look at her.

"I once asked you why you'd picked this job. You said it was another story for another day."

"It's not a good story."

"Can you tell me about it?"

She sighed deeply, glancing at him for a moment before averting her eyes, concentrating on getting the forks nice and dry before tucking them into the drawer.

"You want the long version or the short version?"

A squeal of laughter emitted from the living room.

"Long version seems good."

"Okay."

He stopped cleaning and leaned against the counter, watching as she busied her hands with drying the rest of the dishes.

"I don't talk about the details, I never really have. But when I was sixteen, three of my friends were murdered. I was there. The man who did it, he got away. They finally caught him in Nebraska a few months after Levi was born. He'd been on a slow killing spree for years, they managed to link him to several killings all over the country. He's spent the last five years going to trial for all these crimes in different states. He waives his right to a speedy trial every time, like he gets some kind of sick pleasure drawing the whole thing out. I haven't had to testify yet and I have no idea when I'll have to. But after he was caught, after they started coming out with all these things he'd done, all I could think was someone wasn't paying attention. Someone missed evidence in the early cases that could have helped to catch him sooner. I figured I couldn't trust the rest of the world to keep my daughter safe, so I had better do what I could. This job was the solution I found."

"Wow," he breathed after a moment. "You've got more tough stuff than I gave you credit for."

She shrugged a little and he reached over to squeeze her shoulder.

"Is that why you get offended when Mac sends you away from crime scenes to start processing evidence? You're trying to prove yourself?"

"I guess. Part of me doesn't trust that everyone else is going to do it right, like they might miss something."

"I'd call you a control freak, but I think I understand, at least a little."

"Well anyway, that's that."

His hand slipped off her shoulder and his eyes drifted back to the dirty dishes for just one moment before he turned and wrapped her in a hug, willing her to lean against him. Her hesitation wasn't as long-lived as he thought it would be and she relaxed against him, giving a shallow sigh while his fingers skittered tenderly across her back. If she'd ever been held like this, it was a long time ago, at some point that she'd blocked out of her memory, because try as she might, she couldn't recall having experienced this feeling before.

In the split second before she enjoyed it, she was scared to death.

It was on the tip of his tongue to say something, (he wasn't even sure what exactly) when Levi ran into the room, breaking them apart.

"Hey, is there popcorn?"

"In the universe? Yes, I think so."

"Mama," she sighed, rolling her eyes in a long-suffering way.

"You don't need popcorn sweetie. You already had ice-cream and it's getting close to bedtime."

"Oh, does that mean I could sleep here with Gabby?"

"No, it's a school night."

"Ug, you're so mean to me!"

"Oh am I?"

"Yeah you are! You're just mean and evil mama!"

"I'm sorry about that. I suppose if I was nicer I would have said that you and Gabby could have a sleep over next weekend but I guess I can't do that."

"Oh wait, I take it back!"

"You can't take things back, Levi. Once you say them you can never take them back. You need to learn that lesson. So right now I am going to be mean and tell you that your words made you lose out on something that you wanted."

Most children probably would have burst into tears and apologies or become combative and upset. Levi just took a deep breath and blinked a few times.

"I'm very frustrated."

"I understand, but I made the decision. Go back in and finish the movie and then we'll go home."

Levi obeyed, although very dejectedly, as if her feet were suddenly made of cement and she was loathe to move from one place to another.

"You're tough," Adam said quietly, an observation rather than a criticism.

"It's easier to be tough now than later when she realizes she can sneak out a window, you know?"

"Easy is relative then I suppose."

"Yeah."

He nodded and opened the freezer, pulling out the gallon of ice-cream.

"Seconds?"

"Yes please."

She retrieved spoons and bowls and he started to scoop ice-cream for both of them, laughing when he launched some onto the counter and it rolled into the sink.

"At least it cleaned up for itself," Lindsay laughed, taking a peek into the living room where the girls seemed to be fading. "My child goes from drama queen to sleeping beauty in like two minutes. How does she do that?"

"Kids are weird," Adam answered with a shrug. "She told me she has three boyfriends in her class but she won't love any of them because they're gross."

"I wonder about her sometimes."

"About what?"

"What she thinks a healthy relationship is. All I've ever portrayed to her is that being alone is normal."

"Then you teach her that's what works for you, and she may find out that something different works for her and that's okay. She doesn't learn only by example, she learns by what you tell her too."

"I never really thought about that. It's just easier to feel guilty."

"Well that's not normal. You don't want to teach her that, do you?"

"No. Where were you five years ago when I started this whole parenting thing and really needed some sense knocked into my head?"

"Would you have listened?"

"Probably not," she sighed. "I was a little too stubborn to listen to anyone at first."

"But?"

"But I quickly learned that when my mom said "Make sure you have a diaper underneath her before you start changing her," she only meant it so I wouldn't have more work to do, not because she thought I was stupid."

"And how many messes did that take to learn the lesson?"

"About a week of them."

"You really are stubborn."

"I wear it with pride."


"Levi, I need you to wake up just a little so I can get you out of the car."

"No mama."

"Just a little bit sweetie. I'll carry you in, I just need you to hold on to me."

Levi whined and fluttered her eyes open just a little, long enough that Lindsay managed to get her out of the car and into their building. It was a slow walk up the stairs and once she hit the second flight she had to take a small breather and realize just how big her daughter was getting.

"Mama?"

"Yeah sweetie?"

"Lay with me and talk?"

"For a few minutes," Lindsay conceded, stepping into Levi's room and remembering the mess of glitter on the floor from earlier. "Should we talk about this mess?"

"I don't want you to be mad," Levi yawned.

"I'm not mad anymore but you need to tell me why you decided to disobey me."

"I was just… I was just…," she sniffled, holding back tears. "I was making a Valentines card for… for my daddy!"

"Okay. Can I ask why you were doing that?"

"I just thought we could send it to him," she sniffled. "And he would see that I love him."

"Sweetheart, I understand that you really want your daddy in your life and there is nothing wrong with that. But I need you to know that sometimes things don't work out how we want them to. If you want to make that card and send it to him then we'll do that."

"You won't be mad?"

"Of course not! Sweetie, if you want to go for something and if you feel very strongly about it, then I support you."

"I will think about it. Because if he still didn't love me after that, I would be really sad."

"I know."

Levi sighed and wiped at her eyes.

"I just would like a daddy."

"I know. I'm really sorry that I can't give you one, honey. I would if I could."

"It's okay mama."

They lay in silence for a while, Levi seemingly content with the state of things for now. She never whined for long about a father, but Lindsay suspected that was because she thought about it a lot on her own.

"Mama?"

"Hmm?"

"How come Josh was my dad if he didn't want us?"

"I didn't know he wouldn't want to be a dad, Levi. If I would have known… I don't know sweetie. I wouldn't change anything because if I did I wouldn't have you. And if I didn't have you, that would be the worst life I could ever imagine."

"Worse than… life without dessert?"

"A million times worse."

Levi chuckled and yawned, stretching out a little and pulling her blankets up higher.

"Would you sleep by me mama? I would really like that a lot."

"I have some things to do before I can go to bed, but if you want you can go cuddle up in my bed and I'll be in there soon."

"Okay!"

"But first, we still need to talk about the fact that you disobeyed me."

"I know."

"If you wanted to use the glitter, you should have asked me. It's okay if you wanted to keep what you were doing private but you need to learn to ask for things, okay?"

"I get it. I will remember for next time."

"Thank you. I'm not going to give you a punishment this time because I think you learned your lesson, but tomorrow we're going to clean up the floor together."

"Okay. I love you mama."

"I love you too baby. Thanks for being mine."

"You're welcome. I will be yours every day. At least until I am thirty."

"Thirty?"

"I will be old then and I will belong to just me and my job."

"Would you still be mine a little?"

"I guess so. I still gots a lot of you in me, so maybe I should be a little bit yours still."

"That's all I ask."