A/N: Thank you AngstyShenko and Vorcha Girl for your reviews on the last chapter! And a special thank you to Vorcha Girl for your feedback concerning this chapter. I hope you enjoy it.
Bioware owns Mass Effect.
9. MSV Ontario
They climbed out of the Mako, expressions so grim the others waiting in the cargo hold took a step back when they saw them. Without saying a word Shepard stalked over to the weapons bench and started dismantling her weapons. Kaidan and Ashley joined her, even if they hadn't used their weapons. They worked in silence.
To Kaidan it seemed as though the air around Shepard crackled with energy. Something was making his biotics respond and he needed all his willpower not to flare. Her anger was still palpable. Liara and Tali had also been in the cargo hold when they returned but after one look in Shepards' face everybody had backed away. Even as they stripped out of their armor there was tension radiating off of Shepard. This mission had really shaken her. Kaidan shared a quick glance with Ashley. He would have liked to give Shepard some kind of comfort but he had no idea how to do it. Apart from that he wondered when Shepard would realize she had nothing to change into as she had come to the cargo hold wearing her armor already.
Shepard suddenly stopped undressing. She had just remembered that her uniform was in her cabin, not down here. She groaned. Dressed in only her underarmor she gathered her armor up in her arms and headed for the elevator. Kaidan blinked, trying to focus on something different than the fact that the underarmor accentuated every curve of Shepards' body. He quickly squared away his equipment and followed her to the elevator together with Ashley. This was getting worse and worse, he had to get a grip on himself. And that metaphor had just gone somewhere horrible. Was he glad he hadn't said that out loud, Ashley would have probably died laughing.
The silence continued through the elevator ride. Slowly the tension seemed to leave Shepard. Her posture was more relaxed as she stepped out of the elevator and walked towards her cabin. That was when it happened.
Some junior crew members were sitting around the table in the mess and they could hear the words spoken drift over.
"...took down a thresher maw! How cool is that?!" Private Fredricks sounded excited. The effect it had on Shepard was quite different, though. When she heard the words 'thresher maw' and 'cool' she dropped her armor and with three big steps was at the table. The next thing the private noticed was being pulled out of his chair and slammed against the wall. Shepard was barely 5'3 and Fredricks was over 6', but she had him pinned to the wall standing on his toes without any effort. He was having trouble breathing as she increased the pressure with her arm on his throat.
"So you think that was 'cool', Private?" she hissed through clenched teeth. "A whole platoon of marines died down there, soldier. Do you have any idea what it's like fighting a maw? No, you fucking don't! I'll tell you. You hear your comrades and friends screaming in pain while you try not to get hit by maw acid, you see them being pulled underground, you smell flesh being rotted off of your friends' bodies by corrosive acid, you smell pee and shit because some soiled themselves in their last living seconds. Friends that a few minutes ago were alive and laughing. And all you can do is try to survive because you know if you try saving them you will die..." her voice sounded choked. "Don't ever say that was 'cool'!" She was breathing hard and again shaking with rage.
Suddenly she felt a firm but gentle grip on her shoulder and a smoky voice reached her through the haze. "Commander! Let go of him."
Shepard spun half around, not releasing the private from her grip, ready to defend herself, to find herself looking up into a pair of toffee-colored eyes. Her lieutenant's eyes, looking at her full with worry, she registered. And the haze lifted. She glanced back at the private, who looked terrified. She slowly lowered her arm and looked down at the floor, feeling utterly ashamed of herself. Kaidan slowly took his hand from her shoulder. She closed her eyes and drew a shaky breath, aware that everyone in the mess had seen her lose control.
"Private," she began in a flat voice, "I apologize. This was absolutely uncalled for. If you want to file a complaint to the Brass you have every right to do so. I will accept any form of punishment they deem necessary."
"No, ma'am. It's...it's alright. You were right. I didn't even try to imagine what it was like for...for them." he was still rubbing his throat.
She bowed her head. "Very well. Thank you. And thank you, Lieutenant," she said as she turned her gaze over to Kaidan, "for stepping in. I appreciate it. I couldn't have a better head of marine detail. Now, I have to report to the Brass." she turned and, after picking up her armor pieces scattered across the floor, went into her cabin.
Everybody remained silent for a minute, staring at the closed door of the Shepards' cabin. Then Kaidan turned his attention to Fredricks.
"Are you alright, Fredricks?"
"Yessir. A little shaken, maybe. But other than that I'm fine."
"Good." Kaidan's voice was grim. "Because you will be doing extra duty, Private. Everybody on this ship knows about Akuze and what happened to the Commander there. Yes, the Commander overreacted, there is no excusing that. Nevertheless, you will report to me first thing tomorrow morning and I will inform you further."
"Aye-aye, sir." The poor private saluted. The marines aboard were not used to hearing this tone from the lieutenant. So far he had always been understanding and rather pliant. As long as they did their duty he hadn't told them off for anything they had said. Obviously some line had been crossed now because the lieutenant had a stern look on his face and his whole posture made clear he hadn't been put in command of the marine detail on a whim. Kaidan was no pushover, even if some had that impression.
"Dismissed, Private."
Shepard leaned against the door of her cabin. How could she have lost control like that? She had thought she had gotten past Akuze. Obviously not. Slowly she walked over to her bed and laid her armor down on it. She needed a shower. Bad. But first she had to report what had happened to those marines. She sat down at her desk and opened the communications terminal.
"Computer, I need a private connection to Captain Shepard, my mother. She's the XO on the SSV Kilimanjaro."
"A private connection to the Kilimanjaro not possible at this time," the automated voice of the Vi told her after a short time. She considered her options and made her choice.
"Then give me a private connection with Admiral Hackett."
As the Normandy's VI established a connection she sat there chewing her lip. Finally the image of Admiral Hackett appeared on her screen.
"Commander, why aren't you using the official channel?" he started and then took a closer look at her appearance, furrowing his brow.
"I decided to use the private channel because I wanted to talk to you as Nick and not Commander Shepard," she admitted.
"Very well. Veronika, what happened?"
"We just found a platoon of marines on Edolus, Sparta system. They were killed by a thresher maw after being lured into a thresher nest by a false distress beacon. Would you know anybody who would do such a thing?"
Hackett sighed. "Nick, I can't help you there. I am sorry."
"You can't?...But you know of something, don't you?" She couldn't believe it.
"I have an idea, but I can't tell you yet. Send me your report and I will see what I can do."
"There is another thing. Off the record, Uncle Steve." Shepard hesitated. "I, uh, I just assaulted one of my crew. He was saying how cool it was that we fought a maw and I, uh, snapped. He says he doesn't want to file a complaint but I at least wanted to tell you. My head of marine detail stepped in. Lieutanant Alenko has a solid head on his shoulders. He intervened in a calm but firm manner. I would usually put a positive remark about it in my report but..."
"You're not sure how you can do that without shooting yourself in the foot."
She bowed her head. "Exactly."
"Listen, Nick. I will forget what you did but watch yourself. Otherwise I will have no choice but insisting you go back to therapy."
"Aye-aye, sir."
"Ah, are we back to business? Good. I have something I want you to check out. We have a hostage situation in the Hades Gamma cluster. A group of biotic extremists have kidnapped the Chairman of the Parliamentary Subcommittee for Transhuman Studies. He is responsible for the failure of reparations negotiations for L2 biotics in their eyes as he voted against it. I'll forward you the details."
"Aye-aye, sir. We will head there ASAP."
"Very well. I appreciate it, Commander. Hackett out."
She wondered if Kaidan knew anything about the ongoing negotiations concerning reparation for L2 biotics. She strongly suspected he would, being an L2 himself. She pulled out his personell folder. So far his personell record was the only one she hadn't read yet. She only knew he was an L2 because Dr. Chakwas had mentioned as much to her when Shepard had asked her about the lieutenant. That was also the only reason she knew his migraines were a result of his L2 implant and that there were a lot more horrid side effects. If she were in his shoes she definitely would be following the negotiations.
She opened the folder and began reading. To her surprise several years of his life before joining the Alliance were redacted. All that was mentioned about his biotic training was that he had gone to Biotic Acclimation and Temperance Training with the remark that BAaT had been shut down in 2169. Any other information concerning BAaT was redacted. No mention of why the programme had been shut down either. She had noticed that Kaidan hesitated talking about his teenage years. He had almost made a slip the last two times they had talked. Maybe it had something to do with this, she mused. She ran her fingers across the list of commendations he had recieved so far. Impressive. It was a list that rivaled her own and that again made her wonder why he had never entered N-school.
She found the answer to this a few pages further. It was an application for admission to N-school marked 'Denied'. Nick sat back. She could only think of one possible reason for this and that was Kaidan's reluctance to use his biotics more aggressively. If one thing was expected from N-school graduates it was to be willing to do whatever was necessary to get a mission done. And it was something the lieutenant yet lacked. She would closely monitor his progress and, if he showed potential, write a letter of recommendation.
With a sigh she closed his personnel record and opened her terminal in order to write her report on the mission to Edolus.
Several hours later Joker commed her.
"Commender, we have surveyed the last planet in this system. Do I plot a course for the Citadel?"
"No. Set course for the Hades Gamma cluster."
"The Hades Gamma cluster?" Joker sounded surprised. "Aye-aye, Commander."
She breathed out audibly and rubbed her eyes with the palms of her hands. Spending the last three hours at her desk writing reports, going through requisition orders and evaluation reports of her crew were not her favorite part of being an Alliance officer. The mission on Edolus had left a foul taste in her mouth, as had her slip of control afterwards. And she felt as if the dust and dirt from that damned place was still covering her skin even though she had taken a shower right after submitting her mission report. Maybe she should just sweat it off and do some PT. There had to be somebody aboard willing to spar with her. Maybe the lieutenant would...No! Stop right there! she told herself. Ashley would be a good choice. Or maybe Garrus?
This in mind she changed into her sweats and a t-shirt and headed for the cargo hold. Unfortunately she had to discover that Ashley was in the middle of maintenance and Garrus was laying half under the Mako, along with somebody else. No sparring, then. With a quiet sigh she got onto the stationary fitness bike standing in the back corner of the cargo hold and started peddling. After almost half an hour on the bike she switched to the treadmill. The nice thing about the treadmill and the bike was she could see what happened around her at the same time. As soon as Ashley had squared away the last rifle Nick decided to call her over.
"Chief? Got a minute?"
Ashley walked over, wiping the weapon oil off of her hands with a rag.
"Sure Commander, what do you need?"
"Do you feel up to a sparring round?" Shepard never slowed down. She kept going at the same pace as she looked straight at the Gunnery Chief. Ashley looked perplexed.
"Uh, sure...but..." she glanced at her still greasy hands. Shepard dismissed her objection with a quick wave of her hand and jumped off of the treadmill. Instead she wandered over to the mat leaning against the cargo hold wall and pulled it down to the floor. Then she turned and grinned.
"Don't worry. I'll go easy on you."
"Ha!" Ashley smirked. "I'm pretty darn good at marine hand-to-hand."
"Good. Then let's have it."
Ashley was good. She hadn't been boasting but the N7 training had given Nick an extra edge. Shepard was smaller than the other woman but she was faster and she knew more tricks. After going three rounds Ashley stepped back.
"Geez, Commander! I always thought I was good. Where the hell did you learn to fight like that?" Her breath was coming in short gasps after Shepard had knocked the wind out of her.
"You mean apart N7 training? You have to remember I spent a lot of time shipside as a kid already and there was not much more to do in my pastime other than let the marines teach me hand-to-hand or read. And I generally did both." Shepard rolled her shoulders. "But thanks for doing this. I needed to spar. It's been too long since I last had the opportunity."
Shepard turned to go and saw Garrus and Kaidan standing next to the Mako, watching her and Ashley. She tossed the towel over her shoulder and sauntered over.
"Well, did you enjoy the show, boys?"
"Not really," Garrus answered. "We've been too busy fixing the Mako."
"What?! It was fine on Edolus!" she stared at them.
"It was leaking transmission oil, Commander," Kaidan replied. She looked at them more closely and realized that both had oil smudges in their face. Kaidan had his sleeves rolled up, but there were streaks of oil up to his elbows. "And at the stupidest possible place." He added. Garrus grunted approvingly.
"Didn't know the two of you were mechanics yet too." Shepard grinned at them.
Both men just mumbled something about 'tinkering around sometimes', looking slightly embarrassed.
"Okay." She leaned back crossing her arms. "So you both like to tinker around. With Garrus here it somehow doesn't surprise me. After all he's been ogling the Mako since the minute he came aboard. But you, Lieutenant, I had you pegged as an electronic tech only. Didn't know you had a thing for mechanics as well. Anyway, how long have you guys been working here."
Kaidan glanced at his omnitool. "A few hours, Commander." He hesitated. "Ever since you, uh, went to your cabin. And now, uh, Commander, I would really like to go take a shower."
She nodded, glad he didn't comment any further on the incident earlier. "Of course, Lieutenant. We'll talk later."
"Yeah. I'd like that. But first here are the dog tags from the marines on Edolus. The ones that weren't corroded away by the acid, that is." he handed her a small box. "Commander." He nodded at her and then shot a quick look at Garrus, who was clicking his mandibles. "Garrus."
Shepard remained standing there for a moment as she watched Kaidan walk to the elevator, turning the small box in her hands. She licked her lips unconsiously before remembering that if she wanted to take a shower as well she also had to go up to the crew deck. She sighed and then turned around to face Garrus. He was looking at her with what she believed to be an amused expression.
"Ok, Garrus. Let's have it." She said. While she was down here she might as well talk to everyone.
It was almost two days later when they entered the Farinata system of the Hades Gamma cluster. Shepard stepped away from the galaxy chart and walked to the helm.
"Joker, give me a ten minute notice once we have located the extremists' ship."
"Aye-aye."
Shepard made her way down to the cargo hold, debating whom she should take along. Kaidan should certainly come along. Maybe having an L2 biotic along could help in talking other disappointed or desperate biotics down. Other than that...Close quarters, so someone with a shotgun would make sense. Ashley? Or more biotics? That would suggest either Liara or Wrex. Wrex had a shotgun AND biotics...Yeah, Kaidan and Wrex, that sounded good. On the crew deck she walked towards the control panel he mostly worked at instead of gearing up already. To her relief he was working at his terminal. He looked up as soon as he noticed her approach.
"Commander, is there something I can do for you?"
"What can you tell me about the the recently failed reparation negotiations for L2 biotics?" She watched his reaction closely.
Kaidan didn't answer right away. He turned away from her to close whatever he had been working on. When he finally started talking it was in a hushed voice. "How much do you know about the L2 implant, Commander? No, I should ask how much do you know of the undesirable side effects of the L2 implant?"
"I know that your migraines are a direct result of your implant, Lieutenant. But after talking to Dr. Chakwas I know that there are much worse side effects yet too," Shepard replied.
Kaidan let out a short mirthless laugh. "Yes, you could say that. Insanity, mental disability, cippling pain - the neurological complications can be severe. There are quite a few L2s that have either committed suicide or attempted to. A few friends of mine from BAaT never made it past the age of twenty. The first one killed himself when we were sixteen. Officially he had a fatal accident but ..." He shrugged helplessly. His voice sounded hard when he continued. "We all knew it was stress that made him do it. Psychological and physical stress. He wasn't the first that died at BAaT, nor was he the last."
Shepard could only stare at him. What had the Alliance allowed at that place?
"Okay, back to your question. The reparation negotiations. There are a number of L2s who feel that the Alliance has let them down and some are willing to take extreme measures. Personally I think they are full of crap. Biotics face enough prejudice and mistrust as it is, we don't need these extremists adding fuel to the fire." he hesitated. "Commander, why are you asking about the negotiations? As you said, they've failed and it is unlikely the decision will be revised."
She had seldom seen her Lieutenant so passionate about something. Now she wondered even more about the redacted parts in his personell folder. She opened her mouth to answer only to be interrupted by the comm.
"Ten minutes, Commander."
"Thank you, Joker." She returned her gaze to Kaidan. "A group of biotic extremists have kidnapped Chairman Burns of the Alliance Parliamentary Subcommittee for Transhuman Studies. We have less than ten minutes until we rendezvous with their ship and then we have a hostage situation to take care of. I want you on the team for this, so gear up. You have five minutes, Lieutenant. Oh, and Alenko? Hold the elevator." She turned and went to her cabin to grab her gear.
Kaidan walked to the elevator in a daze. How could his fellow biotics be so deluded? They had to realize that actions such as this just made everything worse. If it was attention they wanted, well they got it, just probably not in the way they had imagined. As he waited for the elevator Shepard reappeared carrying her armor.
"I'm not gonna start undressing in the cargo hold again only to remember my uniform is in my cabin," she said as an explanation. Despite the severity of the situation Kaidan couldn't stop the corner of his mouth twitching into that lop-sided smirk that wreaked havoc with Shepards' feelings, a thing he was utterly unaware of.
As soon as they stepped out of the elevator Shepard called out to Wrex.
"Oy, Wrex! Wanna take out some biotic extremists? If you want to come and play, then grab your gear."
"About time!" Wrex growled. "Still can't believe you took on a maw without me."
"Oh, stop pouting," she told him as she stripped down to her skivvies, very aware of Kaidan doing the same not a meter away from her. Focus, Shepard!
Kaidan was thinking almost the same thing. God, Alenko, you'd think you've never geared up with a female soldier next to you, he chastised himself. Focus! He quickly pulled on his underarmor and began strapping on his armor. He was glad that he had his feelings under control again when Shepard turned her back to him for the usual check and he was glad that she always turned to him for this. Enjoy the little things.
They strapped on their weapons and headed up to the airlock, ready to dock with the MSV Ontario, a Kowloon-class freighter as Joker informed them. Shepard was not surprised but she was grateful nonetheless. This meant that the main layout was a known.
They boarded the Ontario silently, not meeting any form of resistance until they entered the main cargo hold. There weren't that many terrorists but Shepard found herself knocked flat on the floor by a biotic attack when she peaked around the corner of a large crate. Before she had picked herself up again Kaidan and Wrex moved past her, both retaliating with biotic attacks of their own. Then Kaidan pulled out his omnitool and sent a tech attack she didn't know causing the target to glow red and drop down, while she and Wrex attacked with their shotguns. They moved through the cargo hold swiftly after disposing themselves of the attackers.
As they moved towards the helm on they heard angry voices from a compartment on the portside. Apparently the leader of the extremists didn't think anybody would make it past his followers or he didn't care. Before opening the compartment door Shepard turned around and looked at Kaidan and Wrex to see if they were ready. Both gave her a swift nod and she opened the door. As it opened the door revealed a man kneeling on the floor, hands held above his head while another was holding him at gunpoint.
"...too late!" The man with the pistol snarled. He looked up in surprise as they stepped into the room.
"Let's not do anything you might regret." Shepard shook her head warningly.
"Don't come any closer!" The biotic terrorist pushed the pistol against Burns' head. "Apparently the only way to get attention is by a grand gesture such as this!"
"Well, you've got our attention." Kaidan threw in. "Now, why don't you lower that pistol?"
This was a self-assertive manner Shepard had not yet seen in the Lieutenant. He was full of surprises.
"This sonofabitch doesn't deserve to live! He robbed us of our only chance to live halfway normal lives! Only endless pain and no way to afford the necessary treatment," the terrorist leader growled.
"I...I had no idea! I didn't realize how bad the situation of some L2 biotics was! I swear by all that is holy, please let me go! I will take another look at the files and see if I can convince the committee to reconsider!" Burns pleaded.
"Oh? All of a sudden you want to help us?" The biotic extremist snorted in disbelief. "Why should we trust you?"
The Chairman of the Parlamentary Subcommittee whimpered.
"If you don't trust him, then trust me," Kaidan said firmly. "I'm an L2, just like you."
The other biotic looked at him in doubt, but Kaidan firmly held his gaze. The extremist leader lowered his weapon a fraction.
"Prove it!" There was only one way Kaidan could do that. He had to show them his implant. The L2 implant was wider than the L3 implant and didn't protrude as much.
Kaidan threw a short glance at Shepard, who nodded. He stepped forward, holstering his pistol. When he reached the distance halfway between Shepard and Burns he stopped. At a sign of the terrorist leader one of the other extremists stepped closer. Kaidan's heart was pounding in his chest as he lowered his head a bit in order for the other man to see his amp jack.
"He's an L2 alright," the terrorist said, stepping away again. Kaidan walked slowly backwards to his former position, watching the extremist leader consider the options. Shepard and Wrex were also watching the situation closely. So far it had been a good idea to bring the Lieutenant along. He had planted a seed of doubt at their actions in the leader of the extremists. The biotic leader shifted uncomfortably.
"And how do you think you can help us?" he directed his question at Kaidan.
"I can't. But the Commander," Kaidan pointed at Shepard, confidence in his voice, "can make sure he follows through. I vouch for her."
The extremist leader hesitated shortly and then lowered his pistol some more. The chairman lifted his head a fraction.
"I promise, I will do what I can! I had no idea how dire the situation was!"
"Then you weren't doing your job!" Shepard shot at him. "You are the Chairman of the Parliamentary Subcommittee for Transhuman Studies! Your committee is supposed to oversee the situation for human biotics. It was your responsibility to know the situation."
"Commander, I swear I will do all I can. I see know I was wrong to veto the negotiations. I will do everything in my might for a renewal of the negotiations!" Burns turned his head to look at the biotic extremist. To his relief - as well as Shepard's and Kaidan's - the extremist leader holstered his pistol. The biotic suddenly looked exhausted.
"We will trust you."
Burns got up slowly and carefully walked towards Shepard and her squad. Meanwhile she radioed Joker, telling him to call the Alliance for Burns' pick-up. Joker relayed the message and then informed her pick-up would be there within an hour. They waited until the Alliance cruiser designated for the pick-up was close enough to rendezvous and then returned to the Normandy. They returned just as silently as they had boarded the Ontario, not one of them saying a word. As soon as they were in the Normandy's decon chamber Shepard turned to Kaidan.
"Good work back there, Alenko. I don't know if they would've seen reason otherwise." She gave him an appraising look. "More outspoken than I would have expected from you, I admit. You keep on surprising me, Lieutenant."
"Thank you, Commander." He held her gaze a moment. "I have many talents."
"Yes," she answered quietly, "I believe you do."
Wrex' snort reminded them they were not alone. And just in time as the decon doors opened and they stepped into the Normandy's CIC.
