Disclaimer: This universe and the characters within it are not my own. They belong to J.K. Rowling, and all other respective owners. This is a work of FanFiction that no one will be profiting off of. Honest to Merlin, no copyright infringement is intended in the slightest.
Author's Note: I maintain that reviews are appreciated, and apologize to those of you who knew I'd say that. I also thank you, for you've obviously been reading this story. Bet you knew that was coming too. Anyway, thanks a ton! (By the way, I'm amazed at how many reviews I received with these recent chapters, thank you all so much!) Hope you enjoy this next chapter, sorry for the rather long dialogue :O
(Bua ha ha, that surprised-face if you, because you expected a happy face :) probably)
Chapter Nine
The whole thing wasn't nearly as funny the millionth time over, and Hermione was pleased to see that the excitement surrounding Peeve's little tale was subsiding somewhat. She was still upset at Ron, and Ron was upset with her, and really it just made what she'd been thinking about that night all the more relevant.
If he was willing to so easily think badly of her, and get upset with her, while they were friends, why on earth would that be easier in a different sort of relationship? But, then, at the same time, she didn't want to start to think differently. But, she didn't want to not want to have an open mind, because then she would be close-minded, and choosing the path of ignorance, and through that she'd be going against her own principles so long held.
And then there was the whole business with Malfoy. What was it with him? Was he going out of his way to be confusing?-- Now there was a theory. Maybe he was messing with her mind on purpose, and... and... and she was paranoid.
If he wanted to harm her, he could have easily done so when she'd been in such a weak state. She let her guard down, and he didn't attack. Quite the opposite. He treated her as anyone would want to be treated in such a situation, really. Why was that? Was it because he couldn't think of a better thing to to? Had he had something planned, and chickened out?
The whole world was a mess of emotions, and actions, and things that didn't make sense. No, that wasn't quite right. Everything made sense. Maybe it didn't make sense to her, but if she looked at the grand scheme of things, and knew everything that there was to know, surely everything had a cause, caused a reaction, caused an opposite reaction. Everything happened for a reason. That wasn't to say that she believed in fate, no that was poppycock, but more than nothing just came out of nowhere. If you looked hard enough, there was always a cause.
But how was she supposed to look at 'the grand scheme of things'? How could she see her own life objectively if she was sitting there, living it, making decisions and being affected by them?
Simple: she had to find someone who wasn't. Someone who was barely involved at all. And, until she tried to do that, she had no idea how difficult it would prove to be.
~o~
"You kissed Draco Malfoy?"
"Yes. On the cheek."
"To spite Ronald, though?"
"Yeah."
"Are you quite sure that was why?"
"I know that was why."
"Then why are you here, telling me all of this, Hermione? There's a portrait on the third floor, of a old man painting a street corner green, he's wonderful to tell things to."
"See, Luna, it goes on. There's more to it."
"You kissed him twice?"
"No, to the story I mean."
"Oh. Do tell?"
"Well, so Ron made to punch him, and then Snape came in."
"I had heard that part. Robbie Dinframik, a third year, was speaking about it just yesterday. At lunch. I was eating an apple tart, they are quite delicious. Have you ever had an apple tart?"
"Well, it wasn't exactly like that."
"You mean to say you drank the apple tart?"
"No, the story!"
"Now, why would you drink a st-- Oh, oh yes, sorry. Nargle got me."
"A what? Nevermind. So, the thing is, about Ron..."
"You only like him as a friend."
"What?"
"Well, don't you?"
"I-I don't know. I mean, I used to think that I liked him as, you know, more, but now, I dunno, I don't think I do."
"I still don't see what you're wondering about."
"Well, that is, what do you think? From what you know, do you, do you think I like him? Like that, I mean?"
"No, I don't. I can't see why you would. Ronald is rather aggressive. He seems to like you though."
"Oh."
"You were going to ask me about Draco?"
"Yes, yes I actually-- I was. What about him then?"
"Yes, I do think you like him."
"You what?"
"Wasn't that what you meant?"
"No—I was going to ask about what you thought of his recent behavior."
"He's a bully."
"Yes?"
"Well, so what do you know about bullies?"
"They pick on people," Hermione said the first thing that came to mind.
"Yes. But why?"
"Because they're insecure?"
"Not necessarily. Because they like to feel powerful."
"Right. That's why it's good to ignore them. You don't give them power over you."
"Precisely. So, Draco likes having power over people. There are several reasons why this might be."
"Because he lacks control elsewhere?"
"That could be it. Or, perhaps, because he wants attention."
"That seems likely."
"Now, why would somebody want attention, Hermione?" her tone was, surprisingly, not a patronizing one. Just as it usually was, dreamy and rather distant. As if she were feigning interest, or trying to remember something.
"Because they interpret it as a form of approval?"
"Which brings us back to a lack of self-confidence. Insecurity."
"That explains why he always acts to confident."
"Yes, yes I suppose it does."
"But then, why didn't he keep it up, before? He was tired of wearing a mask, so to say?"
"He could have been, but I suspect not..."
"So?"
"So he showed compassion towards you. Pity, even."
"But that doesn't make sense, Luna. He bullies people all the time! He never shows them any compassion, any pity!"
"No, he doesn't, does he. Is that all then?"
"What?"
"I have to go to Care of Magical Creatures."
"Right. Sorry. Well, thanks, Luna."
"We should talk more often. You really sort of remind me of a Chasperkha, sometimes. I think, if you kept an open-mind, you would find them rather interesting..."
~x~
