I rose early the next morning, and was glad to see that Edward was still asleep. I struggled to remove myself from my bed and managed to silently don my robe and take myself out of our bedchambers. I ran into Sophia in the hallway, who, as I had expected, chastised me for being out of bed and tried to convince me to return.

"Thank you for your concern Sophia, but I think it does me no good to spend all day in bed, it is bad for the digestion. Why don't you tell the cook to get started on breakfast for Edward and me and bring the paper? I will meet Edward on the veranda when he is ready."

"Yes, Mrs. Rochester, I will."

I watched Sophia turn to go and briefly thought about calling her back; I had the feeling that I had hurt her sensibilities by not heeding her advice.

"Jane, you don't have to feel bad about that, you are not in debt to the help for their advice, you may take it when you wish or leave it as you wish, you know that."

I had just relayed that morning's discussion with Sophia to Edward and received exactly the answer that I had thought he would give. After sitting out on the veranda the better part of the morning we moved inside to our sitting room. Edward and I had both read the paper, and he had spent some time answering letters while I discussed issues that needed to be tended to in the house.

After his correspondences were taken care of, Edward escorted me out to the beach and I was, as always, astounded by the sight. I often could see nothing in front of me but the water and the falling sun and I was always reminded of God's awesome power. I also realized at those times why Edward had brought me here. It was truly a place where we could feel as though we were the only two people on earth. A modern day Adam and Eve, to us this place was surely paradise.

As usual Edward and I were in high spirits when we returned from our walk; Sophia met us at the door and told us that a visitor had arrived. As the letter I had suspected from my uncle had yet to arrive I briefly thought that he may have decided to make the trip in person. Sophia told Edward that there were several men waiting to speak with him in the parlor. My curiosity diminished when I learned that the visitors were there to see Edward, he sometimes had men come to speak with him about business opportunities in the area. Once Edward excused himself, I made my way to my studio and continued the work on the seascape I had nearly finished. A few minutes later I heard exclaimed voices coming from the parlor and then the sounds diminished, concerned I opened the door to my studio and saw Edward and another man coming toward me, Edward seemed angry, perhaps more so than I had ever seen him before. When he approached he gently pushed me back through the door and closed it behind him, I noticed that the other gentleman had assessed the layout of the room before the door was closed, but seemed content to stand on the other side.

Edward drew me to a chair on the far wall and grabbed a towel from my stand so that I could clean my paint stained fingers.

He knelt in front of me and took both my hands into his, pausing briefly to press his ear to my swollen belly.

When he looked up I could see the tears about to break through their dam in his eyes.

"Jane, my darling, I must speak with you now, and quickly for something has occurred that can't be dealt with swiftly."

He paused briefly and I nodded in understanding as a flash of wariness flooded over my person. I had never seen him look the way that he did then: I braced myself as best I could before he continued; though I was sure that it could not possibly be as bad as he had implied, and even if it was I knew that we would find a way through it together.

I must have shuddered as if to move because Edward squeezed my hands tighter as if to hold me still. His gaze drifted and settled on our entwined hands. "Jane, there is no easy way to say this, and I lack the time to tarry. I have done something awful, Jane. It is a crime that I have committed and the authorities have located me: they are here to take me in. I know that this is a shock to you Jane, and I pleaded with the police to give me leave to speak with you before they take me back to London. I explained your condition and they relented, but only for a few minutes so listen carefully. I have lied to you Jane. I have committed a multitude of sins and above them all, I have lied to you."

He paused and took a deep breath, so hurried were his words that I had no doubt that he needed it. I sat and waited for some definition of this lie. I did not have to wait long.

"Jane I—I, I am not your husband and you are not my wife."

I didn't know what to do when he told me this, so I sat quietly, waiting on what he would say next, though I felt all of the blood rush from my face as my skin paled . "Jane, I say that we are not married, but I fear you misinterpret that: in my heart we are very much married, but the law—the law says that we are not, and I am to blame for that."

He paused to swallow, he had not yet met my eyes, but he did then, I will always remember the look in his eyes and the sound of his voice as he spoke, both were full of conviction and misery. He believed what he said, and he was desperate to show me that he had not meant to cause me grief. "The law says that I am married to another, Jane: a woman that I was tricked into marriage to sixteen years ago. She now lives at Thornfield. She is Grace Poole's charge." He paused again, no doubt trying to decide what he had time to tell me and what he would have to omit. "That woman I married so many years ago Jane, she is mad and I was forced to keep her hidden away at Thornfield because I promised her brother that I would take care of her, you know him, his name is Richard Mason."

As he reviled these facts to me I could do nothing, but I knew that I was shaking my head in disbelief. He reached up and took my head between his hands to still it.

"She was the one that attacked Richard that night. It was she who tried to burn me in my bed the night you came in and rescued me. She is the person you saw the night your veil was ripped one year ago. When I thought that she would hurt you, you can not know how I longed to remove you from where she was. Her name is Bertha Antoinetta."

There was a knock at the door that kept him from continuing. A rough voice alerted him that he had two minutes left.

"Jane. Please know that I love you, and I love our child, and when my sentence is through I will come back to you if you will allow it--though I would understand if you no longer wished to see me. Please, don't worry about me Jane, at least until the baby is born. One of the officers wants to stay here and ask you some questions. I don't want you to tell them anything except what really happened. Do you understand?"

I heard everything that he was saying but it was like one of my nightmares. I expected to wake up at any moment, to wake up in my bed with Edward beside me, but too, I knew that this would not be the case. Edward had committed a crime, against me, against his wife, against his country and against God. I nodded in agreement, for I understood what was happening and what was expected of me, even though I was not sure that I could achieve it.

"Jane, Oh my darling Jane, I am so very sorry, I never meant to have you find out about this, and especially not in this way. Please, please, go back to Thornfield when you can and do make sure that you use the money I saved for you in Paris. When I arrive at my destination I will write you to let you know how to reach me." He paused again as tears came down his cheeks and he whipped at them with the sleeve of my dress, the closest fabric to him. I was still unable to react, I was only watching my surroundings as if I was seeing some play in Paris.

"I know that you will find it difficult to forgive me in the days to come, Jane, but please know that I did not mean to deceive you, I only knew that we had to be together and that I must do what I could to have you, I knew that you would have never came to me if you knew the truth, Jane. But we are meant to be together, it is our destiny and if circumstances had not been what they were, I would have never have let my father trick me into marriage to that woman. It is a decision that I have regretted since the very day I allowed it to happen Jane. You must have faith in me."

The door opened then and a large officer walked into the room. "Jane, please find it in your heart to forgive me, I love so very much, and if you will allow it, I will make it up to you darling." He took my hand, which he had been holding for the last few minutes and kissed it before standing to face the officer. The man led Edward out of the room and soon returned. He did not begin talking right away, and as I waited for his questioning to begin, he tried to hand me one of his handkerchiefs. I looked at it as if it was a foreign object and then realized he had offered it because I had silent tears rolling down my face. He sighed when I did not accept it and put it away.

Once I had composed myself the questioning began and I related to him what I knew. After a half hour he agreed that I was innocent and gave me the address of the prison Edward would be assigned to before his trial in London. He excused himself then: I was left alone in the darkened room and contemplated the events of the past few hours.

As the last of the sunset finally descended, my body suddenly shook and I felt as though my nerves had suddenly multiplied and grown to their full capacity. Even my soul burned with grief and misery, it was the same grief and misery that I had heard in Edward's voice earlier, it took root in my heart and began to eat at me.

No longer could I sit in stunned and quiet silence, it did no good. I did not know the entire story, but I knew that I had been betrayed by the man I had given my whole heart to. Many questions flooded my mind until I was nearly exhausted, what was I to do? Where was I to go? What about my child? How would I explain to it that it was a bastard, that its mother had been deceived into a false marriage? As I paced the floors of my studio what was left of my grief and shock suddenly turn to a type of desperate fury I had not felt since my childhood in Lowood: it took all of the composure I had left to keep myself steady on my feet as I went to the guest bedchamber. I knew that I could not and would not fall asleep in my own chamber that night.

I looked upon the near empty room and through my clenched jaw and blurred vision felt it completely suitable. It was as empty as my mind would have liked to have been: I placed myself on the bed.

Hours later I decided that the servants had probably learned what had happened: no one came into the chamber that night and for that I was truly grateful. I wept bitterly for some hours before falling asleep. My paradise was lost and I knew what it must have been like to be thrown from the gates of Eden. It was as if the earth had closed in on itself. The sea that had been at my door earlier had surely drawn up into a mere puddle, and the world seemed empty as I drifted into a deep and empty sleep.