A/N: It has been a very long time since I've updated this, so, since I had some extra time, I figured I should update. Enjoy!

Chapter 9: whack-jobs

At 11 am, the five had gathered in the alley outside Jack's, staring at…well, nothing.

Wilson scratched his head. "I figured there'd be something, some kind of evidence."

"Well, if I were a vampire, I'd clean up. The cops wouldn't scare me, but vampire hunters would. We can't be the only whack-jobs in this city that cry 'vampire' every time people turn up with blood drained," House put in.

"We are not whack-jobs!" Cameron said, swatting his shoulder lightly.

They spent the most part of an hour on their hands and knees, scouring the area for anything that would give them a clue as to Sebastian's whereabouts. House stood near the opening of the alley, observing the street, and, in general, doing nothing.

"Are you doing alright?" Wilson asked Cameron.

"Yes, everything's ok."

"Did House talk to you about the possibility of…" he trailed off, not sure if he should even be mentioning the topic.

"Possibility of what?"

"Of you being pregnant…by Sebastian?"

"No, he didn't need to talk to me about it because I'm not," she replied, sounding far more confident than she felt. She knew it was possible; she just didn't want to think of it.

"Ok, then. You'd know, I suppose."

"Damn straight." She went over where Chase and Foreman were, eager to leave the conservation behind.

They didn't turn up anything important, so, in defeat, they retreated into Jack's for a beer.

"What about where the first body was found? If there's something there, it could lead us to the flunky," Foreman said.

"I was hoping we could get Sebastian first, then we wouldn't have to bother with the other one," Wilson said dejectedly, sipping his beer. "But getting one is better than none."

"Sebastian's smart. He's not gonna be easy to catch," Cameron muttered.

"That's where we were hoping you would help out," Chase said. All eyes turned to her.

"If you're even considering the possibility that I'll be bait, you're sadly mistaken."

"We would never. We just want you to be open to communication," Wilson assured her.

"What?" Her brow furrowed in confusion.

"When a vampire makes a…connection with someone, he'll communicate mentally. We don't want you to close your mind off in the event he should contact you," Wilson explained.

"Why would he contact me?"

"Well, if you're pregnant with his child, which you're not," he added quickly, holding his hands up in front of him as she glared at him. "Or if he's in love with you."

"Vampires can fall in love?" House asked.

"If you can, anyone can," Wilson said, dodging House's cane which swung at his head.

Cameron looked at him with a brilliant smile.

"Thank you Wilson, she found out exactly how I'd planned."

"Sorry."

"I bet you are."

"Anyway, if he's fallen in love with you, then he might want you for his bride. It's all in the book." He held up the book to illustrate.

"And you're going with this theory purely on the authority of Prince Raoul, PH.D?" House made a face as he read the name on the book cover. He took the book from Wilson and flipped to the inside back cover.

The man pictured there had long black hair with a long black beard to match. He was dressed in black robes and cloth shoes, and carried a gnarled walking stick that looked like a tree branch. An elaborate crown adorned the top of his head. As if to illustrate the PH.D portion of his title, he was wearing a pair of spectacles.

"Whack-job," he stated, showing the photo to the others.

"Come on, looks aren't everything. He knows his stuff," Wilson defended Prince Raoul. He grabbed the book from House's hands and tucked it under his arm.

"Let's go check out where that other body was found," Foreman said. They got up and into their separate cars, heading for the edges of the city.

"Do you really love me?" Cameron asked the second they were on the road.

"I think so."

"You think so?"

"Yea, you see, there's all these levels and grey areas…I think so."

"I always thought it was a simple yes or no thing," she said, puzzled.

"Most people do. But if you think about it, there's more to it."

"So, what level are you?"

"Honestly, I want to spend every minute with you." She smiled at that.

"But I don't think I'd take a bullet for you…yet."

Her smile faltered a bit. "You wouldn't?"

"Would you take one for me?"

"I hadn't thought about it before."

"Well, think about it."

"Depends on where the bullet hit."

He hit the steering wheel with the flat of his hand.

"What?" She asked.

"I hadn't thought about that. That's another level. Now I'll have to re-evaluate everything."

"Greg?"

"Yea?"

"Do you love me? Just yes or no."

A pause.

"Yes."

"I love you too."

They arrived at the spot the first body had been found, and went about the same strategy as the first time, scouring every square inch of ground for clues.

"Isn't there an easier way to do this?" Chase asked.

"Yea, Wilson, why don't you see what Prince Raoul has to say about it?" House called over to Wilson, who was pulling back grass blades on a patch of ground.

Wilson ignored the tone of voice, and sat down with the book.

"I'm afraid this the best way. But if we find something, we can try a summoning spell to locate the vampire more easily."

"A what?!" House came over and plucked the book from Wilson's grasp. Wilson looked up at him as he read the section Wilson had just read.

"A summoning spell. It'll be a lot easier than trying to track him the old fashioned way."

"But, the thing is, Wilson, the old fashioned way actually works! Spells do not!"

"The spell itself is right there in the book, on the next page."

House turned the page. "Latin gibberish," he commented.

"It's not gibberish. Just give it a try. If it doesn't work, the worst thing is we've wasted a bit of time."

"On the other hand, if Prince Raoul says it works…" House scoffed and handed Wilson the book.

"What have we got to lose?" Chase said.

"I don't believe it'll work, but why not try?" Foreman put in.

"I'm game," Cameron said, "but first we have to find something out here." She raised herself up then, and looked at Wilson. "What kind of thing do we need to find to do the spell?"

"Anything that belongs to the vampire. A hair, a cloth fiber, anything like that."

"What about a fingerprint? Would that work?"

Wilson consulted the book. "It would. We just need to lift one. Why? What are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking that instead of wasting our time out here, we could go back to the body in our morgue and see if there's anything on here that maybe the police missed. There would for sure be some kind of fingerprint. Maybe something on the other victim too, that could lead us to Sebastian."

Wilson raised her off the ground and hugged her tight. "Good thinking! I'm glad at least one of us has a brain!" He paused. "Maybe there's something on you that could lead us to Sebastian."

"No, I cleaned everything, and scrubbed myself thoroughly. There is nothing." And that was that. She brushed past Wilson, head high, and got in House's car.

"I gotta keep my mouth shut," Wilson muttered, going to his own car.

They went straight to the morgue, not so much as looking at anyone else. They went in and Chase pulled open Nicole Fairfax's drawer first, so they look for something connected to Sebastian.

They found nothing. The body was spotless.

"I bet he made sure nothing could be connected to him. He doesn't want anyone to find him or use a summoning spell on him," Wilson commented.

"He reads Prince Raoul too?" House asked.

"Summoning spells are commonplace in the supernatural community, House," Wilson informed him. "Prince Raoul didn't invent them or anything."

"Well, let's just hope the other vamp was sloppier," Chase said, closing Nicole's drawer, and reaching for Emily Willis's. His hand was on the handle when a sharp voice stopped him.

"What are you all doing in here? You all call in sick, which is suspicious enough, and then I hear you're all heading down here? What is going on?"

They all froze and slowly turned to face the Dean of Medicine.

"We're conducting an investigation. It required our full attention," Wilson stumbled over his answer.

"Your patients require your full attention, Dr. Wilson. As for you, House, I can't say I'm not surprised. Now, what kind of investigation needed your full attention, and was one you felt the police couldn't handle."

"Vampires." House said simply. He grabbed the book from Wilson, and held it up. "Prince Raoul says they're evil and need to be killed. Plus, the dude we're after banged and possibly knocked up my girlfriend, and has killed two people with the help of his little vampire bitch. So, we're down here, hunting for something we can use to cast a spell, courteously of Prince Raoul, to summon said bitch, so we can kill him before moving on to the big kahuna." He took a deep breath.

"You're all insane, or lying. That's it. I'm going to back out now, and pretend none of that was ever said to me. You will all be at work, on time, tomorrow, and I don't want to hear another word about vampires." She backed slowly out of the room, closing the door behind her.

Wilson sighed, and took the book from House. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For getting her out of here. I wasn't sure what I was going to say, so thanks."

"He didn't knock me up," Cameron whispered, more to herself than anyone else.

Chase opened the drawer, and they began their search.

"Found something!" Foreman called, holding up a hair in his gloved hand.

"How do you know it's not hers? Or one of ours?" Wilson said.

"Anyone have pure white hair?"

"Ok, put it in here." He handed Foreman a baggie, and then put it in his pocket.

"Now, we just have to wait for the next full moon."

"What?" Chase asked.

"We can't do a summoning spell unless there's a full moon."

House rolled his eyes. "When's that?"

They located a calendar and found the next full moon to be two weeks off.

"Would it be any faster if we did this the old fashioned way?" Cameron asked.

"No, I don't think so. We don't know what we're doing. I wouldn't even know where to start."

"Two weeks it is then," Chase said. "I don't know about you all, but I am exhausted. If there's nothing else we can do right now, I'm going home to take a nap. I'll see you all tomorrow." He left and the rest followed.

A/N: Please, please R&R!! I hope you liked it!