Chapter 9

"I'm sorry for the late the hour, I wanted to return these to you." Lexa's eyes were as soft as her voice.

"I didn't mean you had to give them back to me, they have to be more comfortable than that and I definitely didn't mean you had to give them back to me right away. Keep them."

Lexa shook her head. "I insist Clarke, I could see how uneasy it made you."

Clarke couldn't help but laugh. She always knew Lexa was good at reading her, it was something she appreciate about the Commander. "That's not why it made me uneasy." Clarke watched as Lexa nodded, the woman was clearly tired. "Why don't you come in and sit down for a few minutes before you head back. I need to talk to you about my meeting with your generals." Clarke knew the only way that she could get Lexa inside without an argument was to tell her she needed to talk to her.

The last time Lexa stood in this apartment she hadn't moved any further than the front door but she got the impression that she was to follow Clarke. She moved slowly behind the other woman as she was led into the living room. Clarke sat down on the couch and looked up at Lexa. "Take those clothes and go change. The washroom is the first door on the right." The Commander was about to argue when Clarke stood back up. "Go and change or I'll do it for you. Then we'll discuss the meeting." Her voice wasn't harsh but it had a more commanding tone to it than Lexa would have liked.

It took all Lexa's energy to not say something snarky in return. Clarke was confusing to say the least, one minute she hated her the next she was telling her she should change into her clothes. "That's not necessary. I'm fine in what I'm wearing."

Clarke raised an eyebrow and glared. "Go change."

Taking a breath Lexa finally turned towards the washroom. Five minutes later she walked back over to Clarke and saw the same look on the woman's face she had earlier. "This makes you uncomfortable, I don't like it."

"Sit down so we can talk." Clarke said, trying to keep her voice steady. She kept telling herself to pull it together but all she could think about what how good the Commander looked in those sweat pants. Clarke's t-shirt was just a little too short on her and it allowed for a small gap of skin to show between her abdomen and hips. The blonde swallowed the lump in throat as she closed her eyes and tried to remember why she was so angry with the woman sitting next to her. "I spoke with your generals, they didn't say much. I can't say that Indra was happy to see me but she said it was better me than someone else. They said they're glad you're going to be okay. Indra basically said everything is as it was and that you have nothing to worry about."

Lexa nodded. "And you believed her?"

"I did. The camp was quiet, I'd never seen it like that before and they weren't expecting me."

"Thank you, Clarke. I appreciate you doing that, yours is the only opinion I truly trust." There was so much Clarke wanted to say in that moment, about what happened outside the mountain but as she took in Lexa's appearance she couldn't bring herself to start the fight.

"Wait." Clarke reached her arm out and gently touched Lexa's as the woman went to get up. "I was about to watch a movie, if you want to stay?"

"I should really get back, I'm sure Jackson will wonder where I've gone, I don't need your mother locking me up to keep me still."

"Sit, rest. I'll take care of them." Lexa watched her stand up and open her computer. A few seconds later she walked back over to the couch and sat down. "Taken care of."

XOXO

An hour into the movie Lexa turned and looked at Clarke. "What kind of a line was that? Where I come from the cook doesn't clean. How does that even work, it's not the least bit romantic."

Clarke couldn't help but laugh. She had never seen Lexa like this and she had to admit that she liked it. "She seemed to like it."

"Would you?" Lexa hadn't really meant to say it out loud but she was embarrassed that she had.

"I guess it would depend on who said it to me but do I really look like the cooking type?"

Lexa shook her head. "No, you look like the type to be the ring leader of the whole big plan. Racing cars, stealing things, sounds about right for you."

"I'm a total bad ass, thank you." There it was, Lexa's signature eyebrow raise that simultaneously gave Clarke butterflies and chills. "I am, I created a ring of fire!"

"With Raven's help."

"Oh so I guess that makes you the bad ass?" Lexa nodded. "As if."

"I would be Dominic. I'd do anything to protect my family."

Clarke had to give her that point. "But so would I. Fine, since you're such a movie expert, who would I be then." She uncrossed her legs to stretch them out as she looked at Lexa for an answer.

"Probably the blonde buster. You match the profile after all."

Clarke thought about it for a minute before smiling. She had to agree, that's probably how it would have turned out. "Okay, I'll give you this one but only because it means we'd still be rivals."

They went back to watching the movie, neither saying a word. Not even when Clarke noticed that Lexa was shivering. Instead she reached behind her and grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch. Leaning over she draped it over the Commander whose eyes were barely open at this point. Standing up Clarke took a look at Lexa's IV pole, before making a few adjustments.

It took another fifteen minutes before they spoke again. "You unhooked my IV?"

"You don't get your next dose for the another couple hours, might as well give your arm some freedom to relax."

Lexa nodded as they again went back to watching the movie. It wasn't long after that that Lexa drifted off to sleep and at some point her head ended up in Clarke's lap. Clarke felt herself getting tired as she finished watching the movie, her fingers aimlessly ran through Lexa's hair. She was so peaceful when she slept and no matter how long she had been here Clarke was sure she would never think anything else. She heard mumbling causing her to look down as the brunette in her lap readjusted and got herself comfortable again.

XOXO

A few hours later Clarke felt a weight on her chest as she slowly started to wake up. She went to stretch but was unable too. Coming to her senses she looked down at what was keeping her in place. Lexa's head rested on her chest, the blanket around them both, one of Lexa's hands holding Clarke's. Clarke didn't give herself the opportunity to think about the position they had fallen asleep in.

It wasn't until she made her way into the washroom that she realized the butterflies that had been floating around in her stomach and the way her hand still tingled from being held by Lexa's. This wasn't good and she knew it, she needed to shut it down, Lexa had been right. Emotions were weakness and she couldn't afford to be weak, she couldn't afford to be hurt again.

Ten minutes later she emerged from her bedroom in fresh clothes to see Lexa sitting up straight on the couch, still somewhat out of it. Leaning against the doorframe she couldn't help but feel a little bad for how sick Lexa was.

"How did you save me?" She figured she'd try a new approach because asking her why wasn't getting her any answers and she needed to understand. "You need your next round of antibiotics so I suggest you start talking."

Lexa nodded, she knew that tone in Clarke's voice and it was all business. "Once we got back to camp I doubled back, they weren't expecting anyone to come back, least of all me. I slipped in through the reaper tunnels. The hallways were clear, I saw a few of the bodies and knew that it had been Octavia, the technique was very grounderesque if you will. I followed it to the dining hall. I knew I wouldn't be able to get in that way so I remembered you and Bellamy talking about the vents." Clarke was still leaning against the wall, arms folded, staring right at Lexa as she spoke. "I followed the sound of yelling through the vents and it led me right to where you all were. You were all chained to the walls. Your mother was lying strapped to the table. Emerson had a gun," Clarke watched as Lexa tensed, her voice getting darker, "He had a gun pointed at your head, holding you close to his chest as Cage spoke. Your head was bleeding badly and you looked like you could barely keep your eyes open. I can't tell you what Cage was saying because I really wasn't listening all I could see the blood dripping down your head and onto the floor. Bellamy was on his knees, a gun pointed at the back of his head by one of the mountain men. I threw my knife at the guard before putting my sword through Emerson's back. I put it right through his heart, though I wanted him to suffer I needed to make sure that he was dead, I wasn't about to risk any more lives to watch him burn. As he went down I caught you before you hit the ground and laid you down gently as Cage looked at me with disgust and yelled about how I broke the truce but in that moment he wasn't my concern. He was nothing more than a power hungry lunatic, he wasn't smart. I knew he wouldn't get far so I focused on getting your mother free so that she could help you."

"Was I still awake? When all this was happening because I don't remember any of it."

Lexa nodded. "Your eyes were open but I don't think you were really there."

"That's why Octavia is better with you because you saved Bellamy."

"Yes. You were right, her brother means more to her than anything. I'm sorry I didn't trust you more. I never should have doubted you."

It was Clarke's turn to nod as she made her way over to the couch. She put her hand out to help Lexa up. "Let's get you back to your room and get you your medication and something to eat." Her tone was gentler again as she wrapped her arm around Lexa's waist, like the way she had when they were running from the pauna.

She got Lexa back to her room and back into bed. She moved around carefully as she set up Lexa's next dose of medication. "I'm going to get them to bring you something to eat. I'll be back later to check on you, okay?" Lexa nodded as Clarke began to leave.

"Thank you… Commander." Lexa nodded, trying to hide the pain she felt every time Clarke called her Commander instead of by her name.

XOXO

"When she got back to Polis, I could tell something was different about her. It didn't take long for me to figure out what it was. All she did was talk about Clarke of the Sky People. The fearless leader who was the smartest woman she had ever met. I took a little offense to that but when I met you I understood. She's not the person you think she is, not completely."

Clarke and Alexandria were in the middle of an intense chess game and Clarke couldn't help but pick her brain about her grand daughter. "I don't understand, in the three weeks I had spent with her she never really opened up that much."

Alexandria let out one of her now signature laughs. "She did, you just didn't realize it. Remember Clarke, everyone is different when you aren't at war."

The blonde smiled as she made her next move. "I should have known right away that you knew her. The way you say my name reminds me so much of her, she's making it very hard for me to be mad at her."

"I understand why you're mad but remember that we all make mistakes. I'm not saying that Lexa made the right choice but believe me when I say she took a lot of slack for it but she trained to protect her people no matter how much it hurts her. She's carried the weight of her decisions with her, but she was certainly right about one thing. If she was ever going to throw her leadership away, you'd be the woman to do it for."

"She said that?" Alexandria nodded.

"But never let her know I told you that."

"She barely knows me though, we barely know each other."

Alexandria reached out and softly put her hand on top of Clarke's. "She's a very good judge of character and for what it's worth for what I've seen I can see why she thinks so highly of you. No one has ever understood her the way you do, not even Costia. As angry as you are at her, a part of you understands her decisions and that has made you even more upset."

There was a knock on the door before it opened. "Hi ladies, how's the game?" Abby moved into the room, a big smile on her face.

"Very good, your daughter is far to wise for me though."

Abby grinned. "She gets that from her father, I don't have the patience. I come with good news. Your scans are clear so you should be able to go home tomorrow. You're welcome to stay for as long as you want but medically I don't have any more reason to keep you. Though I do suggest taking it very easy and having your healers watch you closely, just to be safe."

"That's great news!" Clarke said excitedly as she stood up from her chair and gave the woman a hug.

"It will be good to get home, but you have to promise you'll all come and visit me in the capitol."

Abby and Clarke both nodded. "Promise. I'll go and tell Lexa, I'm sure she'll want to know." Smiling Clarke headed out of the room and down the hall.

"Does she realize she just said her name, happily?"

Abby shook her head 'no'. "It's a good sign though, maybe there's hope for them yet. My daughter is nothing if not stubborn though."

"Her heart aches, my grand daughter better hope she knows how to fix it."

"She's doing a pretty good job thus far." Abby smiled as she explained to Alexandria how she found their family members curled up on the couch together, the TV still buzzing from being left on and their fingers entwined together.

TBC….