Title: Such a Beautiful Mask

Author: Kathea

Rating: PG

Pairing: AZ/Jeb; Cain/DG

Disclaimer: I've yet to figure out a way to own any of this.

AN: I've got a general idea of where this is going but no idea of when we'll get there. Enjoy the ride. And now we have come to it, the big, deep, insightful conversation. Or at least a part of it. Introspection this deep can't be solved in one conversation. And Cain and DG decided to show up. Go figure.

I've had far more time on my hands recently than expected. This chapter was typed today because I'm spending it taking care of my mom. She just had brain surgery to remove a benign mass. It went well and she's healing very quickly after having her brain cut open, tumor removed and a metal plate put in. Very thankful to God that all has gone so well.

Summary: And one day all that would be left was a shell of a woman and a beautiful mask.

Chapter 9

Jeb wasn't sure if she had just fallen asleep or passed out but Azkadelia was suddenly limp in his arms. What had seemed so natural before, to reach out and hold, was now awkward. There seemed to be no good place to put his hands and his left foot was asleep from the pressure of her body. Jeb wanted to move her, adjust something but Azkadelia had a firm grip on his shirt as she slept. Jeb resigned himself to his position and let his hand take up a slow sweep. Head to hair and down her spine and back. He had vague memories of his mother doing the very same to small, restless child.

Jeb realized that he'd dozed off when the lump of woman in his arms began to stir and he struggled to open his eyes. Azkadelia's head lifted up from where she'd buried it in his chest. Her eyes were red-rimmed and hazy. His hand had started up that slow sweep from head to back. For a split second, Az only sighed and rested her head against his shoulder. As she lifted her head back up, Jeb watched as the mask slipped into place. "You can let go of me now." Az said crisply. Jeb's hands dropped to the side quickly. Azkadelia seemed confused when she didn't move away. Jeb reached up and tapped her fisted hands with one callused fingertip.

"You're gonna need to let loose of my shirt, Princess." Azkadelia fingers slowly uncurled, knuckles cracking as she went. She slid backwards off his lap, landing hard on her rear. Azkadelia moved silently across the camp, falsely intent on searching her saddlebags. When it seemed she'd found what she was looking for she was suddenly to her feet and marching down to the shore.

Jeb sighed, wondering exactly how things ended up this way. Pulling off his boots, Jeb headed towards the water, racking his brain for the right words, whatever those were. He found her, toes dug in the sand, with her chin propped on her knees just staring at the waves. Dropping down beside her, Jeb adopted the same position and let the silence settle. He could tell when she started to fidget that she hadn't expected him to sit quietly beside her.

"So…are you okay?"

"I'm fine." Jeb spluttered a laugh at her statement.

"Really. What about the past few weeks says that you are fine?"

"What else am I supposed so say?" And Azkadelia's voice turned resigned.

"The truth."

"I don't see how that would help."

"The people that love you can't help you unless they know what's wrong."

"How can they help? They can't go back and stop DG and I from finding the cave or the witch possessing me. They can't change that I've killed people, almost destroyed the kingdom. What exactly are they supposed to do?"

"Who knows? But unless you tell us, how will you know?"

"I'm afraid. Of what they'll see." She paused and said quietly. "They'll be afraid."

"What is there to be afraid of?" Jeb asked encouraged.

"I can't." Tears shimmered in her voice.

"Show me." His voice was softly insistent. Jeb watched as the artfully constructed mask fell away in jagged shards. Beneath was a face that wore fear like a permanent tattoo. In her dark eyes, terror still hunted a little girl. It was a testament to exquisite control that she'd not broken through before. This was a deeper trauma than he'd seen in war. The earlier confidence had fled leaving his lips dry and empty of words. She was right. Some people would be afraid if they saw this. What were you supposed to say to fix something this broken?

"How can anyone fix me when I don't know what's broken?"

"We're all broken, Azkadelia." Jeb said quietly, holding her eyes. "Just in different ways."

"What if I'm not fixable?" It was the scared voice of a little girl.

"I guess we just start from scratch. It's as good a place as any." Jeb replied, hoping it was the right answer. When he felt her hand slip into his, he figured it was right enough for now.

~~!~~

With Queen Lavender returned to power, the Ice Palace was no longer the empty, haunted place it was the first time Cain had been there. It was still cold, brutally so, outside the walls but now heavy rugs protected feet from cool marble and fires crackled merrily in hearths throughout. It was almost beautiful now. He still avoided that great room and wide expanse of window. He could still feel the crack of glass against his skin, the wind whipping like a razor across his face and the icy suction of the water. He had to force himself to un-hunch his shoulders each time he passed by. His body still remembered the long, awful fall.

"Wyatt," DG's voice called him from across the bedroom she'd claimed as her own. He looked up from the gun he'd been polishing at the solitary figure in the window seat. DG continued when she knew that she held his attention. "Az isn't out here." After weeks of uncertainty her voice held confidence.

"You're sure."

"Oh yeah. Something has changed. Before it was like she'd disappeared off the face of the eart…OZ. Now, it's like there's a shadow or something. I can feel her but can't pin down where she is. I know it's no where close though." Wyatt surged to his feet, mentally checking the contents of saddlebags. DG's laugh startled his thoughts and he frowned at her. "We aren't going anywhere right this second, Wyatt."

"I guess. I'm ready to be out of here." Cain grumbled.

"I know. Me too, sort of." Cain arched a pale eyebrow to have her continue. DG rose from the cushioned seat and moved slowly to stand in front of him. "I'm never alone at Central. Just to be able to sit and stare out the window or talk to you without interruption."

"Yeah, it's quiet here. Sort of peaceful." Cain agreed and reached out pulled DG closer, bodies bumping together companionably. DG looked up, eyes sparking with curiosity. Since the "conversation" in the forest, things had warmed up considerably much to DG's excitement. But considering that prior to things were frigid, the quick, mostly chaste kisses were boiling by comparison. And she was trying, really trying, to be patient and not push but it was getting more difficult each day to keep her hands to herself. DG knew it wouldn't be long before her patience snapped and the live wire inside of her blazed beyond control.

"It's nice not having so many people underfoot." DG agreed equably. Taking the hands currently exploring her back as encouragement, she slid her hands up his chest to curl around his neck.

"Things are different back at Central. Have to be."

"Like what?" DG asked and was pulled even closer to Wyatt's large frame, hands cupping her hips.

"I can't do this there." What had been gentle before was dark with hunger as Wyatt's lips bruised hers. DG opened her mouth on a moan and Wyatt slipped his tongue in to taste her mouth. It was quick, far too quick for DG's liking. Wyatt was pulling away, smiling down at the frustration DG wore openly on her face.

"Then we aren't leaving." DG said firmly and walked backwards towards the bed pulling Cain along with her. She let herself fall backwards when the bed touched the back of knees. She watched him from under her lashes and stretched up, arching her back. Knowing the movement exposed the skin of her stomach to Cain's dark eyes, her grin turned predatory.

"You are going to be the death of me." Cain growled and sat down a careful distance beside her. "So, back to the topic at hand, where are we supposed to go now?" DG scrubbed her hands across her face and like a small child, peeked at him from between her fingers.

"You're not going to be happy." DG said to which Wyatt only continued to stare at her. She dropped her hands. "I think that Jeb was right or at least more right than me. When I look towards the sea, where Jeb was headed, I see that shadow. There is something there, maybe Az, maybe not but I can't think of anything else."

"So, do we mount up for the ocean?" Cain asked. DG hesitated. She'd had a lot of time on her hands, time to think. Realization had not come as a lightening bolt but as a slow rearrangement of understanding.

"I don't think so. And not just because I want to stay here, just me and you." DG grinned but then turned serious. "I think Az ran away for a reason. She'd been through so much. She needed, needs, time to figure everything out. Sure, we could chase after her, force her back home but I think that would just break her." Propping up on her elbows, DG blow out a breath that fluffed her bangs. "And even though it hurts, I think Jeb is the right person to be there with her, if he found her. The Az I remember and the Az I met when I came back are the not the Az that is here now. I want my sister back but I don't know if she even knows how to get back or if she even wants to."

"That's…complicated." Cain replied, shaking his head at the whole idea. "What do you want to do?"

"Wait. We've got a week before we are supposed to start heading back to meet up with Jeb. If we hear from her before then good. If we don't, then we head back and go from there. If Az doesn't want to be found, she won't be." DG shrugged. Cain stood and paced to the frosted window and stared out at the falling snow. He wanted to see his son again. There was an ache in his chest knowing his boy was so far away and getting into all kind of trouble. It was impulse, instinct, to want to pull him close and keep him there. But DG's words had given him a sinking suspicion that he wasn't going to able to keep his son close to him. He'd only just found Jeb again it felt like he was slipping away. He didn't tense when he felt DG slip her arm around his waist and tuck herself under his arm. Wyatt pulled her closer letting the feel of her head tucked under his chin soothe the hurt. If Jeb felt the need for some private soul-searching then he would give him the time. It seemed Wyatt Cain had some soul-searching to do of his own.