Hey beautiful people, I hope you're all good :) Here's a nice big update for you. This chapter didn't go the way I had originally planned but sometimes the characters end up taking the story where they want it to go...

I hope you enjoy it :) more coming tomorrow...if i survive my 14 hour day. Much love xxx


As Jane got out of the elevator back upstairs in Homicide she couldn't help but notice the sudden energy she had, and she couldn't stop smiling. She hadn't kissed Maura intentionally, although she couldn't admit it was unintentional either. She had watched the medical examiner shut her eyes and do her weird breathing that she only did when she was trying to calm down, then whisper softly that she couldn't do this anymore. Jane didn't know exactly was 'this' was, but she had a fairly good idea, and the only thing that seemed right at that moment was to kiss her. Kiss her so hard and passionately she forgot all her troubles and relaxed into Jane's arms. Which was exactly what had happened.

She fell back into her chair at her desk and tried to bite back her smile, working surrounded by men with a cheesy smile displayed on her face was not something that was going to go down well. Trying to refocus herself on the case Jane couldn't stop her mind wandering back to what had just happened in the morgue every few seconds. She was still very much confused as to where all these feelings towards Maura had suddenly come from and she knew it was an inconvenient time for them to be starting, right as potential fiancé had just been shipped back to war. Jane knew moving on was not an option on her plate right now, but she couldn't help herself from wondering if Maura had been right when she had said maybe it wasn't meant to be.

The afternoon sped by for Maura, she spent the remaining hours she had with Susie in the crime lab working on the substances they had found at the scene earlier today, it was a nice distraction for the doctor being able to focus solely on her work, not being distracted by wandering thoughts every few minutes. But as soon as she walked out the door and got into her blue Toyota her found herself submerged in silence, and she knew it wouldn't be long until she was desperately trying to find that silence again after her thousands of thoughts started clouding her head. She drove home stopping briefly to get some takeout, not having the energy or will to do any cooking tonight then carried on home, however when she went to pull into her driveway another car was already in residence there. She pulled up on the side of the road, not enjoying the idea of leaving her car so out in the open but she had no other choice. Lifting her dinner and her purse from the passenger seat she quickly got out of the car and made her way to the door.

"Angela?" Maura called out as soon as she was in the front door, the lights to her house were on which usually meant Angela was inside.

"Who's car is th…" Maura's voice trailed off as she walked into the kitchen and saw her biological mother sitting at her kitchen counter with Angela and a glass of wine.

"Hope" Maura said slowing putting her things down on the dining table, looking at her mother curiously.

"Maura" Hope said getting up immediately "I hope I'm not intruding Angela let me in, she called me earlier said you'd been a bit shaken up today?"

"Y-you're in my parking spot" was the only thing Maura could think of saying, she hadn't entirely forgiven Hope yet and so she still felt a slight tenseness between them.

"Oh" Hope said frowning "I'm so sorry"

"Maura…" Angela's voiced broke into the conversation her tone was warning the blonde not to be too hard on Hope.

"I um…thank you for stopping by" Maura said finally "But it was unnecessary, I'm completely fine I simply had a reaction to a toxin that was on the body and it caused a small nose bleed, no harm done"

Hope frowned "Did you identify the toxin?"

"It's a chemical" Maura said with a impatient sigh "Used in most cleaning products, now if you don't mind I would really like to have my dinner"

It was a large hint at Hope that Maura wanted her to leave but Angela wasn't having any of it.

"Maura c'mon" she said staring at Maura silently begging her to cut her biological mother some slack.

"No, no it's okay" Hope said trying not to look disappointed "I understand, you've had a long day"

Maura nodded.

"I'll go" she said slowly turning to collect her things as if part of her was hoping Maura would suddenly let her stay, seeing the small woman looking so hurt Maura couldn't help but feel a twang of pain herself. She had wanted to move on so badly, she had even pretended for a while that she was over it, but Jane had reminded her she wasn't that she only ever spoke to Hope when Hope called her, and she talked to her like she talked to the neighbour who watered her roses. As much as she wanted to forgive Hope after everything she had done to her, all the pain she had caused she just couldn't forgive and forget all of that hurt so easily, what kind of person does that? And what kind of person would that make her? Maura didn't like to be trampled. "Does it bum you out?" Jane had asked her, but Maura had bit her tongue "yes" she had replied. "No one's gonna judge you if you want to start over with your mother Maura". Jane's words had comforted her, it was amazing to Maura how sometimes Jane knew exactly what Maura was thinking and other times she had no idea. But she still couldn't forgive Hope, not just yet, she couldn't just forget the fact that woman had told her she wasn't her daughter then accused her of scamming, you couldn't just let something like that go so easily, but eventually she would have to.

"Hope…" Maura ran her fingers over her forehead, exhausted from thinking.

"You can stay if you want, finish your wine"

Relief and happiness flooded Hope's face and she smiled lovingly at Maura who merely tugged up one corner of her mouth in an exhausted attempt of smiling.

"Are you sure?" she asked already putting her things back down. Maura replied silently giving a defeated shrug of her shoulders, before dragging her dinner over to the counter and sitting down, two seats away from Hope. She caught Angela smiling proudly at her and she resisted the urge to pull a face the way Jane would, after her mother had pushed her into doing the 'right thing'.

Hope stayed for little over an hour, and the three of them talked, and drunk wine although Maura barely made it through one glass still feeling iffy from her drunken display the previous week. Hope and Maura talked like two strangers would in line at a checkout, it was vague small talk and Maura wanted nothing more than to be alone, even if she had to suffer through the constant muddle of thoughts in her head. She just wanted to wallow, she was unsure why she was feeling so glum Jane had kissed her. She had kissed Jane. They had shared a beautiful moment together, but something was bothering her, something seemed off, she quickly shook if off reminding herself not to think negative thoughts because her head would create something that didn't exist, she probably just felt strange because her biological mother was sitting in the same room as her.

And on that note Hope rose from her seat as if she had heard Maura's thoughts and took them as a cue.

"I should get going" she said placing a hand on Maura's shoulder carefully.

"I'll walk you to the door" Angela volunteered seeing Maura still slumped over the counter.

"I'm really happy you let me stay, Maura" Hope said and Maura gave a small smile.

"Me too" she said softly, and she meant it. Hope was a fascinating woman and Maura wanted to know her so badly, but only time would heal the wounds Hope had opened and all Maura could do was hope that one day everything would be okay between them.

Once Hope had gone Maura said goodnight to Angela then went upstairs and changed into her silk pyjamas, then went into the bathroom to complete her usually nightly routine. The sudden tranquility of her house was somewhat peaceful to Maura's ears, she quietly pondered the encounter she had just had with her mother, she hadn't realised at the time but Hope had been genuinely concerned about Maura's wellbeing if she had come all the way over to her house to make sure she was okay. It was a sweet thing to do, it was a motherly thing to do. Maura sighed walking into her bedroom and standing in front of her bed looking at it, she didn't want to get in, and she didn't want to go to sleep. What she wanted was to see Jane and tell her about what had just happened, she wanted to hear the brunettes husky and comforting voice assure her that it was okay to be feeling how she was towards her mother, and it would still be okay to forgive her. She glanced at her phone that sat on her nightstand wondering if she should call Jane, it was nearly midnight and Maura knew Jane would most likely still be awake. But Maura didn't take a step towards getting her phone, she stood grounded in spot every muscle in her body frozen as an idea crossed her mind.

"Don't, Maura" she told herself but that wasn't enough. She grabbed her coat and slipped it on over her pyjamas then dashed quietly down the stairs, sweeping her keys off the table and soundlessly exited her house.


Persistent banging woke Jane from her nap, as she jolted upright on her bed she found herself fully clothed and all the lights still on. She rubbed her eyes and looked at the clock realising that she must have dozed off when she had gotten home. 12.04am. Who was possibly trying to break down her door at this time she wondered dragging herself out of her room and across her apartment, unlocking the door and pulling it open ready to growl at whoever had disturbed her. But when she saw the medical examiner standing there with a coat hiding her pyjamas she immediately took a step back to let the woman in.

"Everything okay?" she asked as Maura came in flustered and began taking off her coat.

"Hope was at my house when I got home" Maura said fidgeting nervously with her fingers. Jane lifted an eyebrow and went into the kitchen filling Maura a glass of water and handing it to her, then gesturing at the couch for them to go and sit. It was routine, it was what always happened if Maura showed up in the middle of the night, or if Jane showed up at Maura's. Despite anything else that was going on with them they would always open their doors for each other when they needed each other.

They sat down on the couch and Maura took a sip of the water, Jane was still in her work clothes although they looked decidedly crinkled and her curls were messy, she figured Jane must have fallen asleep.

"So?" Jane asked leaning an arm on the back of the couch so she was facing Maura, ready to hear whatever it was that Maura needed to say.

"So I almost wanted to forgive her" Maura frowned "But I couldn't and so I was rude and…" she shook her head when struck with what a mess she had made of a perfect opportunity.

"Maura" Jane said softly "She has to earn your forgiveness, you're absolutely right not to just leap onto her bandwagon now that she wants you in her life"

"I know" Maura said looking down at her hands "I just feel like I keep screwing everything up with her and…and she'll get tired of waiting and leave again"

"Oh honey" Jane said seeing Maura struggle to keep the tears from falling down her cheeks, she scooted closer to the doctor and wrapped her arms around the smaller woman, creating a warm and comforting embrace. She kissed the side of Maura's head as she sniffled quietly.

"She won't leave you" Jane said feeling Maura's tense body against her own "She loves you Maura Isles" Jane couldn't help but feel as though the words that were coming from her mouth could be said for her as well. She felt Maura relax in her arms, comforted by her words she gave the blonde's back a soothing rub before releasing her arms from around her.

"You haven't done anything wrong Maura, remember that" Jane said and Maura nodded.

"Thank you Jane" she said lifting her glassy eyes to meet with the detectives.

"I'm sorry to bother you in the middle of the night"

"Maura no" Jane said "You know my door is always open for you" Maura gave Jane a small and grateful smile, before wondering whether she should go. She had instantly felt better when she had walked through Jane's door, all the millions of thoughts that had been crowding her head had vanished and she wasn't sure she was ready for them to come back. Right now it was just her and Jane. Nothing felt complicated, even though Maura knew better. Which is why she surprised herself by leaning over and placing a gentle kiss on Jane's lips.

"I'm sorry" she mumbled her lips barely detached from Jane's "I couldn't help myself"

"Don't" Jane said "Ever apologise for doing that, you hear me?"

Maura felt a wide smile spread across her face at Jane's encouraging words, she placed her lips firmly back onto the brunettes and kissed her again. Her hand wandered across Jane's leg and up her thigh, teasingly adventuring in the gap between them. Suddenly she broke away from the kiss and took a small breath looking at Jane.

"This is too complicated" she whispered her hazel eyes searching Jane's but Jane just smiled.

"Then stop thinking Doctor Isles" she said and placed a kiss on Maura's lips.

"Let everything go" she whispered wrapping her arms around Maura and pulling the medical examiner close.

Stop thinking, let it go. Maura repeated to herself mentally, and as she continued to kiss Jane she began to feel free, she was filled with passion and happiness and she felt free. Free from her thoughts, free from any tangled labyrinth of emotions, it was just two hearts beating next to each other and it was perfect.

Jane carefully pushed the medical examiner back down onto the couch, and slowly lowered herself down onto the blonde. Maura kissed with a burning passion, desire igniting in every inch of Jane's body she had never felt so alive, so present in the moment. As Maura's hands snaked around Jane's waist, her warm fingers crawled under the detectives t-shirt and begin to slide up, slowly, seductively.

"Is this what happens when you stop thinking?" Jane questioned in-between kisses and Maura smirks against the brunettes lips.

"Shh" she mumbled and wrapped her legs around the detective pulling her closer, kissing her with everything she had. She felt desire rip through her body as she craved Jane's skin against her own, pushing the brunettes t-shirt up, up and tugging it over her head she freely ran her hands over Jane's strong back muscles, before sliding them round to the front and undoing her pants tugging them down Jane quickly slid out of them. Then she undid the first button of Maura's silk pyjama top breaking her lips off the doctors and placing a kiss where she had just uncovered, then continued with the rest of the buttons, placing kisses down Maura's chest and stomach. Maura breathed heavily, her legs tightening around Jane as she was consumed by lust, the feel of those lips on her stomach was almost too much. Suddenly Jane's fingers were hooked into the top of her pyjama pants and they were slowly sliding off her, leaving her in nothing but her laced underwear. Jane crawled back up and hovered above Maura with a cheeky smile playing on her face, Maura lifted her head and caught Jane's lips with her own pulling her down, the warmth of their skin as it touched created a burning heat between them, their tongues danced and Jane's hands wandered down Maura's bare sides eventually coming to the top of her underwear and she hooked her fingers in teasingly tugging at them.

"Stop" Maura whispered as logic suddenly took over her brain as she realised what was about to happen.

"Do you really mean that?" Jane asked placing kisses along Maura's jaw.

"You're only doing this because you miss your boyfriend" she said quietly and Jane lifted her head her brow furrowing.

"I don't want you to cheat on him" she said her breathing still heavy "I don't want to just be a quick fuck"

Jane lifted an eyebrow at Maura, it was strange to hear the medical examiner swearing it was a rarity to happen to say the least.

"Is that what you think?" Jane asked her voice was thick and husky, she explored Maura's deep hazel eyes knowing the doctor had just told her the truth.

"Maura, no" she said when the medical examiner bit her lip in reply "I put the ring away remember, I'm doing this because I want too" she urged Maura to believe her "I'm doing this because…I can't stop thinking about you"

"Is that a lie?" Maura asked her voice barely above a whisper, she played with a strand of Jane's curly brown locks.

"No, it's not Maur" Maura's face softened as she heard those words, her heart felt as though it had skipped a beat.

"I want to do this" Jane said in assurance one more time and Maura nodded with a small smile growing on her face.

"Me too" she said as Jane placed a loving kiss on her lips, a kiss that told her not to worry, it was the tender touch of someone who cared about her, who wanted her as much as she wanted them. Her passion enveloped Jane, they became one, dancing tongues and the raw intensity of skin against skin. Fire burned inside the both of them, and Maura's breath was taken away, she was transported, filled with infinity at the feel of Jane's touch, there was explosions of bright colours and rivers of lust, she was lost in a world where only she existed with Jane, there two souls combining as one. Unable to exist without each other. She arched her back as Jane filled her completely, unable to think, unable to remember her name or her birthday she was fulfilled, in a thousand ways she never thought she could be. She felt whole. She felt content. She felt Jane.


Still with me?

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