((~from sandyandmaxwellfanatic))

Dear Ivan dude,

Don't insult my daddy! He's cool and he calls me Centennial state, so I'm pretty awesome right? Even though, he needs to take a trip to my mountains and stop eating so many burgers...

Anyway, I heard that the 2014 Winter Olympics at your place (I'm scared.). Just so you know, Lindsey Vonn is gonna kick your A$$. We Coloradoans were BORN for snow. You BETTER do a good job at those Olympics because I was supposed to get them in 2002, but my bro Utah got it. Ugh, he keeps stealing all my tourists...

I hear you don't like snow. Why hate the cold? It's awesome and I get to go snowboarding in Vail if it snows.

From Alfred's Kid,

Colorado

P.S. I've never met you before and people say you're as scary as hell, but I don't think so. I just think you're a little lonely and need an awesome person such as myself to help you out.

P.P.S Stop spying on my dad.

xx

Dear Colorado,

I never insult your father. I only speak the truth, and you would be surprised how often he calls me a "fucking commie bastard" as well. So please don't go around accusing people without knowing the entire story. Your father is indeed, a moron. It would do him great if he did get the exercise, да?

I heard that wonderful news as well, and I am greatly looking forward to it. Please do not underestimate my people, we Russians know our way around snow all too well. Much better than you ever will.

Hm… I do not like the snow because of how chilling it is, it does not allow for any sort of fruit or plant to grow and it is… hard for people to attach themselves to each other, their teeth are chattering so fast they don't exactly want to talk. It is quite complicated D:

Sincerely Yours,

Иван Брагинский

P.S. Yes, there are rumors about me. And it is safe to assume your father talks about me quite a lot. But do not worry, I am sure we can both get along :D

P.P.S. I cannot guarantee anything.

-PimpinSushi here 8D

Translations in order:

Да – Yes

Иван Брагинский – Ivan Braginski

~PimpinSushi