Disclaimer: All I own (or will own anyway) is a fedora. And a trench coat. And well, my clothes and this computer and keyboard I'm using. Katekyo Hitman Reborn? Of course I don't own it. I'd be lucky if I get any of the official merchandise besides the books. --

Author's Note: Tried to make it longer but now I can't even think. Fucking grades. Fucking school. Fucking everything.

Chapter Summary: The good news: Hibari's not the one training him. The bad news: two psychopathic lower echelon Varia members are, and they expect him to spar with Hibari as preparation!


At first, Tsuna thought his eyes were playing a trick on him.

"HIBARI!?"

But alas, they weren't. The slender form of the head prefect was standing in his doorway, staring down at him with some imperious air, but obviously he stepped in at the wrong time. Because there was no way that Reborn could've possibly meant him! Hibari wasn't a Varia member-- as far as Tsuna knew, he still thought of the Varia as a hill of monkeys with Xanxus as the king of all monkeys! The older boy shifted his gaze from Tsuna to Reborn, and immediately stepped aside, pointing to the man behind him.

"What do you think you're trying to pull here, baby? I refuse to fight someone that is weaker than I."

Tsuna's eyes flickered over to the strange man (perhaps he was the one that Reborn was talking about) and took in all his features. He was tall, slender, had a build similar to Dino's but he couldn't tell for sure as the man was cloaked in a heavy jacket that looked much more comfortable than the Cavallone heir's. The man was very... effeminate, to say the least. However, it wasn't as blatant as Lussuria, because despite having hair that reached his buttocks with a soft face and gentle eyes, he held himself confidently. Something told Tsuna that despite the fact that this man might be laid back, he knew what he was doing and wouldn't make clumsy mistakes like Dino.

Well, except for accepting Reborn's request, that is.

"I sent him to train you in preparation for your upcoming fight with Oria. Just to get in shape."

"Then you should've called that blond-haired moron," Hibari scowled impressively. "I still have a score to settle with him."

"I'm starting to think this is a bad idea, Reborn-san," The man behind Reborn sighed half-heartedly and shifted the strap on his shoulder that held up an assortment of assault rifles and machine guns. "Hibari-kun here refuses to train with me because he is already well acquainted with guns--and I agree with him, personally."

"I have no use for firearms. They are tools made for herbivores." Hibari snapped. Reborn lowered his head, but was smiling mysteriously.

"Well then, I guess you'll have to be Tsuna's tutor then, Takumi. As for you, Hibari. There's another member from the Varia coming-- I guess they're a bit late."

"I refuse to be trained by monkeys lead by the most idiotic king of monkeys ever."

"Whoa, dude, that's a bit harsh--although I'd have to agree with you when it comes to Xanxus-san. No one ever has the guts to say anything to him though." Takumi sighed, but immediately brightened up and snatched Tsuna's hands, shaking them energetically. "Pleased to meet you, Sawada-san! I guess I'll be your tutor then!"

"E-Eh?" Tsuna was oh so very lost in this whole matter. Then again, you would be lost too if a bunch of suspicious characters (come on, assassins are suspicious, no?) began congregating in your bedroom and you still have to explain this whole situation to your mother (then again, she seems to be a bit clueless--no offense). He sweatdropped nervously. "R-Reborn! I can't have assassins coming to tutor me! People would be twice as suspicious!"

"Well, you accepted a professional hitman as your tutor. What's the difference?"

The difference?

"You're a baby!!" And so, Tsuna began thrashing around, waving his arms with enough force to make them fly right off as he tried to get the point across. Surely Reborn must know how that form of his immediately disarms females and males alike! Even he, Tsuna, future boss of the Vongola family fell for it the first time they met (and he earned a boot in the face for it, too--that hurt). "They're adults! And besides, Takumi's suspicious enough with all the guns hanging over his shoulder!"

"Dude. I swear to god, stop dissing me!" Takumi growled in irritation, veins popping on his forehead.

"Oh, don't worry! I decided to have them enroll in Namimori as to be less suspicious!"

Less suspicious? Try more! After all, how were they going to pass as junior high students? Takumi himself could not possibly pass for a junior high student--not when he literally towered over the rest of them and had some physical trait that gave away his true age. Apparently, Hibari seemed to be thinking the same thing because his scowl deepened, and he looked about ready to bite someone to death. With his teeth, not his tonfa.

"No. They will not be allowed on the premises whatsoever. If I so much as smell them, they will be bitten to death." Hibari emphasized his threat by drawing one of his tonfa out, his ice cold eyes narrowed and angry.

Tsuna also supposed that the close proximity of other humans was beginning to affect Hibari negatively also--and it didn't help any bit that Lambo and Ipin decided to barge into the room with an explosion of noise. Lambo was, once again, chasing Ipin around pretending to be the oh-so-frightening broccoli monster. Unfortunately, it was working on Ipin. Fortunately, she stopped running as soon as she laid eyes on Hibari. Hibari looked down at her curiously, and Lambo crashed into her back. Tsuna blanched when Ipin started drooling, and tugged at his hair.

"Quick, throw her outside before she--"

Too late. The Pinzu Time Bomb activated. Funny how she chose to latch onto Hibari's leg, also.

"NOOOO!" Tsuna screamed, Takumi raised his eyebrows in sheer confusion as the sixteen year-old dove down to Hibari's leg and grabbed Ipin, trying to pull her off of the chairman of the Disciplinary Committee.

Hibari swiftly reached down and pulled her off with surprising strength and looked up at Tsuna. The brown-haired boy quickly snatched Ipin from his hands and threw her out the window, right when the countdown reached one. A deafening explosion--accompanied with the suffocating scent of garlic--shook the foundations of the house and Tsuna fell clumsily backwards into a solid form. That of Hibari's. As usual, Tsuna didn't notice the important facts until they were blazing at his face. His intuition, however, sent shivers down his spine as he obediently looked over to his shoulder to see who he crashed into.

Ice cold silver eyes, with a hint of blue. Frozen rain. Hibari. Crap.

Before Tsuna had time to scramble off him and mutter a thousand apologies, Hibari beat him to it by roughly shoving him off, right into Takumi. Tsuna crashed into the tall man with a grunt, wondering if Hibari was extremely pissed because it's not everyday strangers show up at your door demanding to train you. In Hibari's case, it never happened, because first, his uncle was there to train him. And second, he didn't need it. The head prefect threw an exasperated (exasperation!? Since WHEN!?) glare at the two before turning to Reborn.

"As I have said, I refused to be trained by any of the monkeys. And if I so much as catch a whiff of them on my grounds, I will bite them to death. Slowly. Surely."

"Are you sure, Hibari? I trained her, before I trained Dino." Reborn asked, with an indecipherable smile.

"Her?" Takumi, Hibari, and Tsuna inquired.

"I will not be trained by a woman."

Hibari's expression gave Tsuna the distinct feeling that the prefect was feeling like he was being mocked by a whole bunch of mocking birds, and he was quite fed up with it. In fact, he raised his tonfas ever so slightly to attempt to slam Reborn into the wall when Takumi sneezed.

Loudly.

It was one of those sneezes that you can hear, even in a classroom where everyone was shouting at the top of their lungs. And from seeing Takumi's face right after he sneezed, Tsuna assumed that it was not allergies. It was an omen. Unfortunately, his suspicions were confirmed.

"...Reborn... just who else did you ask to tutor these kids?"

"Zhang Rui Ling, of course!"

Takumi blanched so much that he put the white-washed walls of the bedroom to shame.

And right at that moment, the door creaked open.


"Now that we know he's alive, what should we do, Oria?" A man demanded from his place, farther across the room from where Oria sat, swirling a glass of wine.

"We should kill him, of course! The bastard's destroyed half of our forces by himself!"

"Yeah, we should kill him, right now!"

"You think it's that easy?" Her velvet voice cut right through the tension in the air, and the racuous chatter of the men died down, shrinking underneath her stare. Her eyes penetrated you in ways that made you feel like dirt, even though she didn't say anything. But of course, she did this time around. "If you were defeated by that boy when he was thirteen, do you think you can handle him now? Besides, he has the Vongola backing him."

At the word "Vongola" the noise exploded, this time with hateful yells.

"VONGOLA SCUMBAGS!"

"DIRTY MURDERERS, BASTARDS!"

"WE SHOULD KILL THEM!!"

The men were too busy arguing to notice the smirk that appeared on Oria's face.

"Yes, we should kill them. The cute little Juudaime...and his little guardians."


"Oh hell no. Not her. Nothernothernothernothernother--" Takumi was thrown forward by a tremendous blow to the back of his head and his jaw smacked painfully into the desk placed right into the middle of the room. Tsuna blinked in shock and turned to the door and his stomach dropped.

That person standing there was a she?

She was wearing a leather jacket with studs on the shoulder, a black shirt with skulls on it, black cargo pants ripped and torn in several places, with three belts on. Her boots were at least two-three inches thick, and matched Takumi's. Her hair? Bright freakin' flaming red. A beacon in a crowd, far more ostentatious than even Lussuria's hairstyle. Yet, unlike Takumi, she had no surplus of firearms, and he could only see two holsters peeking out from beneath her jacket. In her hands was a rolled up newspaper. Why she was in possession of it was beyond him.

She turned her dark grey eyes upon Reborn and snarled.

"Damn IT, Reborn, I thought you SAID that BASTARD wouldn't be HERE. I TOLD YOU I WILL NOT TUTOR ANYONE IF HE'S HERE."

"I'm sorry, I couldn't call anyone else. Only he and you agreed to come. I didn't know you guys were on bad terms with each other."

Tsuna desperately wanted to scream LIES because he was pretty sure Reborn knew everything but played it off as the innocent number one hitman baby. When he caught Hibari's eyes, it seemed as if the head prefect wanted to say the same thing. Apparently, Ling didn't think so either and rolled her eyeballs, giving Takumi a kick in the buttocks before turning to Tsuna and holding out a hand.

"Hello, Juudaime. I'm Zhang Rui Ling, and I'll be yours and your partner's trainer for the next week or so!"