Chapter 9

Janes POV
"We're not adopting her, Maura." I kept my voice as calm and composed as I could as I sat across from her in my mother's kitchen. She nodded slowly, clearly working through her thoughts before she opened her mouth. Something I should really learn to do.

"Why did you suggest it?" She asked, looking at me with wide eyes that were full of confusion and questions. I knew I deserved every question she threw at me. It was me who put the idea in everyones heads, and I'm now the one who doesn't want to do it. I know for Maura of all people; that would be the hardest part to grasp.

"Because I thought if Kate thought someone else wanted her baby; she would want her." Mauras brow tightened as her eyes dropped back to her hands that were holding the cup of green tea my mother had made her. I wasn't kidding when I gave her my reasoning behind offering to take in Imogen full time. I never once considered the option that Kate may actually want to give her daughter to her sister who she hasn't seen in ten years.

"I'll do it myself." Maura said in a hushed voice as she pushed away from the table and picked Imogen up off of the living room floor where she was playing with my mother.

"If you walk out of this house I'm not going to chase you, Maura." I told her, not moving from my place at the dining table as she began grabbing all of Imogens toys and shoving them into the diaper bag. I couldn't stand the fact that anytime we had any sort of disagreement, her first instinct was to run.

"I wouldn't expect you to." She snapped, my mother watching on silently and awkwardly from the floor. I nodded and rolled my eyes, pulling my car keys out of my pocket and shaking them so they made a loud clinking sound. She stopped what she was doing and placed a hand on the hip that wasn't holding Imogen. "Give me your keys." I laughed and placed them back in my pocket without hesitation.

"Sit down." I instructed her, and after a few moments of hesitation, she did. She placed Imogen on her leg and bounced her lightly to keep her slightly entertained. I knew it wouldn't work for long, so I grabbed Mauras phone that was sitting on the table and placed it in Imogens waiting hands. "Why do you have to jump straight to adoption?" I asked seriously, earning a glare. "Why can't you… Why can't we just keep her exactly as we have been?"

"Why did you suggest adoption if you hate the idea so much!?" She yelled, causing my mother to instantly walk over and lift the little girl out of her lap.

"I already told you." I reminded her, forcing myself to keep calm, knowing if I let my emotions get the better of me for even a split second, she would leave and I would not follow her. She merely shook her head at me as she bought her hands to her face.

"Are you coming home with us tonight?" She asked with a sigh, her facial expression telling me she was over having this conversation for now.

"I have to go get some more clothes from my place, but yeah." I said simply, choosing not to push the conversation any further. We sat in silence for a few moments before the sound of Imogen letting out an excited, happy squeal followed by my mothers loud laugh from the other room filled our ears. As hard as we both fought, we both broke out into laughter at the sound. Apart from Mauras voice, nothing had ever given me goosebumps the way Imogen laughing did.

"Things can stay the same." She said as her laughter began to fade. She looked up at me and rolled her eyes, smiling softly as she moved to sit on my lap. "I just… I love that little girl, Jane." I merely nodded, completely understanding her point of view as I wrapped my arms around her middle, breathing in her scent while she pressed light kisses to the top of my head.

"Let's get our girl and go home." I whispered, leaning up to press my lips against hers. Her hand moved to the back of my head to hold me in place when I tried to pull away. "We're at my mothers." I reminded her between kisses that got more and more heated as they progressed. She smirked at me before pressing one more kiss to my lips.

"Let's go home."

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Mauras POV
"Mom!" The sound echoed in my head as I stood completely bewildered at the now 18 month old that was standing in front of me. Jane pursed her lips and smiled, looking at me expectantly. What are you supposed to say to a child that age to make them understand? Nothing.

"Yes, sweetheart?" I said, my voice straining as I forced the words out of my mouth. We sat in the park across from the BPD, having a quiet lunch while Jane was on her break. There was so much going on in my family this week that I had decided to take the week off and devote all of my energy to Imogen.

"There! There!" The little girl exclaimed, her finger extending to point toward the swings. Jane looked down at the watch on her wrist before she put the plastic tub in her hands in my lap. Before I knew it, she was running toward Imogen, lifting her off the ground and running towards the swings.

"Be careful." I laughed as Imogens laugh echoed through the small inner city park. I took pleasure in the quiet moment I got to myself. Most of my days consisted of taking care of Imogen and some days, taking care of Jane. My father was coming back into town today and I had agreed to let him spend some time with Imogen and myself, though I highly doubted that Imogen would remember him at all by this point.

I was worried about seeing him, considering the last I had heard, he had been severely injured and I had not yet called to see if he was okay. All I did was email him and organise a time and place for him to see his granddaughter. I wouldn't have even done that if it weren't for Kate pestering me every day until I did do it.

We had finally decorated the guest bedroom according to how I assumed most toddlers had their rooms decorated. It was strange, thinking my guest bedroom was now a full time bedroom to a tiny human. Before Imogen I never even considered having children. She was something else, that's for sure. She was the smartest, funniest, most adorable little girl I had ever laid my eyes. I was completely and totally in love with her.

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Mauras POV
Today was the day. We had kissed Jane goodbye, made breakfast and were now waiting patiently for my father to come knocking on the front door. I had made more of an effort to make everything presentable than was probably necessary. I don't know why I felt the need to convince him I was doing good with Imogen. What he thought meant nothing. Or so I told myself.

"You both look beautiful" Jane had assured me before she left for work, yet I felt the need to check Imogen for stains and spills once more before… On cue, he knocked on the door.

"Oh god." I said under my breath as I walked straight to the door, knowing if I hesitated for even a second I never would have opened that door again. He stood before me silently, a bandage on his right shoulder visible just under the top of his shirt. "Come in." Was all I said as I opened the door further and moved to the side to let him walk inside.

"Hi baby." He said lovingly as he picked a cautious Imogen off the dining room floor. She pulled away from him slightly and looked from his face to mine. I forced the happiest, most encouraging smile I could, but it wasn't enough. She reached her arms out towards me, a shocked and defeated expression coming across my fathers face as he let me take her off of him. I placed her straight back on the floor where she stood behind my legs reluctantly.

"It's strange that she doesn't remember you." I said sarcastically as his eyes drifted shut for a few seconds at the truth behind my words. "Anyone would think she hasn't seen you in seven months." I laughed, taking her hand and leading her to the living room where I sat down with her, placing a doll in her hands.

"Kate mentioned you're adopting…"

"No." I stopped him sharply, looking up to meet his eyes. "We're just her full time caregivers." His eyes widened slightly at the word we.

"Jane lives here?" He asked, his eyes looking around the living room and noticing the many photographs of Jane, Imogen and I that hung on the walls and mantels.

"She has her own place, but she may as well live here; yes." I told him, no emotion behind my words whatsoever. I hated that he felt he could disappear for however long he pleased and then show up and expect to know every aspect of my personal life. "What happened to your shoulder?"

"Hows work?" He asked, ignoring my question and clearly grasping at straws as he tried to find a conversation starter that wouldn't end in me shooting him down completely.

"It's good." He groaned at my two word answer and Imogen looked up to find the source of the loud, unfamiliar sound. She frowned at him before going back to what she was doing. "You're here to see Imogen, so how about you get down on the floor and make an effort with her?" I suggested, not moving from my place beside her, knowing if I did she would just follow me. He nodded and took a seat next to me.

After an hour, Imogen had finally warmed up to her grandfather enough to let him hold her. Anytime I saw anyone play with her or make her laugh, I couldn't fight the smiles that found their way onto my lips. But seeing my father play with her just made my stomach turn. As her primary care giver, I hated knowing people were thinking it's okay to come and go from her life. It was confusing and unfair. She deserved so much better.

"Jane's going to be home in ten minutes." I warned him, giving him the option of staying and meeting her, or leaving. Of course, he chose the latter. "Listen to me." I said to him sternly from the front door. "There will be no coming and going from her life as you please. If you want to see her, call me and organise something. But don't expect for it to be okay for you to come once a month. She deserves stability." As soon as the words had left my mouth, a strange feeling washed over me.

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Mauras POV
"You became her mom today." Jane told me as we lay in bed, her head resting on my chest as I told her all about the afternoon Imogen and I had had. "How did it feel?" She asked, looking up at me, making me smile as she placed a light kiss on my chin.

"It felt amazing." I admitted, remembering the overwhelming sense of protection and love I felt this afternoon. "You're amazing." I added, sliding my body down until my face was level with Janes. "What are we doing?" I asked, tilting my head slightly to rest on the pillow.

"I think we're lying in bed." She said with a playful smile as I rolled my eyes at her words. "We've been together for a long time now, and we still haven't been on one date." She laughed, knowing exactly what I was talking about.

"Take me on a date." I told her, using the tone of my voice to let her know it was a statement, not a question.

"God, are you going to be this bossy for the rest of our lives?" She asked, and somehow her little backhanded comment left my whole stomach fluttering with butterflies.

"Are you taking me on a date or not?" I giggled, bringing my hand to rest on her cheek, my thumb stroking lightly as I awaited her answer.

"Can I take you on a date tomorrow night?" She asked sweetly, her voice becoming shy as she looked all around my face. I closed my eyes and giggled like a sixteen year old girl as I nodded yes, pulling her face into mine and covering every inch of her face in kisses.

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