Note to my lovely readers: The grading continues, but they have learned that I can smell other people's work and as a result I am getting less plagiarism, no less crap but at least the theft is less. I have appreciated the reviews. Some day when I have more time I hope to start individually replying again.
BTW: I don't own Castle. Blah, blah, blah…AM is that genius, not me.
"Is that intense enough, or will I have to do better?" (Beckett)
"Why don't you listen first and then decide?" (Castle)
He Said Start at the Beginning Chapter 9
Beckett's Apartment Early A.M. Thursday
Kate still hasn't slept yet. Her mind is grinding on thoughts of her and Castle. Every question she has presented him with, he gets her to decide. Things can't continue this way. She wants an honest and fair relationship. She knows she has bulldozed over him for years as a partner, but outside of work she needs something even keeled. How can she make him see that she is ready for him to decide something…anything?
Her phone rings. She answers, knowing another body must have dropped.
"Beckett. You might want to bring spare clothes just in case." Esposito says.
"It looks that possible?"
"If our vic wasn't a guy, I would think it was pregnant."
She wrote down the address and prepared to leave. She called Castle in hopes he would answer.
"Hey. You need me to read you to sleep or did a body drop?"
"I should have called you for that, but instead we have a body. Do you want to come to this one or sit it out?"
"Which would you prefer?" Rick waited for her answer.
"What I want shouldn't be in your decision here Rick. Do you want to be involved in this crime scene, yes or no?" She realized she was overly harsh but couldn't think of a way to diffuse her irritation with the situation.
Rick didn't say anything. "Look, I am sorry I snapped at you, but Rick…I need you to know what you want to do. I can't tell you when you need to see me or need to write. All I know is when I want to see you, but you get to have a say in this. I tell you what I am going to do, I will text you the address, suit yourself." She hung up without waiting for his reply. She hoped he understood that she wasn't angry with him, yet she found that actually anger wasn't far off.
She sent him a text of the address and headed for the shower.
He complained when she didn't let him drive, go first, or do countless other things. Now when she needed him to care, he wanted her to choose everything. Why? She kept thinking this through as she prepared herself for the crime scene.
By the time she parked her squad car, dawn was breaking over the horizon and she still hadn't slept yet.
She spotted Lanie and the boys going into a warehouse. Beckett stood by her car waiting a few minutes, hoping Castle would appear. She looked at her watch. It was 30 minutes since she had called him. Without another thought, she switched into detective mode leaving thoughts of him behind.
12thPrecinct Noon Thursday
Kate sat at her desk nursing her cold cup of coffee. The latest vic had not been officially stated as being part of the same case, but this time Lanie's autopsy would at least be performed on the victim while they were still intact. When this happened, Kate was certain it would be the same killer. The only problem they had was that neither victim seemed to have anything in common other than being male and theoretically force fed rice. The second victim, they were still guessing, but she was sure that is what they would find. She stood up to clear her overly tired mind, walked to the break room and began to make another cup of coffee. Maybe it would clear the cotton candy out of her head. She just couldn't get a clear thought today. Then, she went back to sit on top of her desk and stare at the murder board. Something had to link these victims, but what?
She had no idea how long she had been chewing on her lip and staring at what little evidence was gathered when Rick bumped hips with her as he sat down.
"Anything interesting?" Rick asked
"Depends on how you define interesting. I am waiting on Lanie's latest autopsy. Theoretically I should go watch her perform it in another hour, but I really have aversion to showering gastric juices from myself again. So far we have two dead fairly tall middle aged white men from 2 different boroughs." She looked over at him, trying to read what he was thinking.
"Anything interesting going on with you today?" she asked hoping for some clarification on what he was there for. Was it the case or was he here for her?
"I dropped in because I just emailed Gina a record 5 chapters in 2 days. I want to celebrate, but whatever we eat shouldn't contain rice. "She smiled.
"You won't decide what you want, but rice isn't on the menu. That leaves lots of possibilities. Do you want steak, pizza, pasta; okay anything Italian, hamburgers, hot dogs, corn dogs, Mexican food, or seafood?" She asked.
"You pick."
"No Rick. Your celebration, you pick the restaurant." She is beginning to sound annoyed again. Her voice rose a little with her words.
"Why don't you pick Kate? Seriously, why do I need to do it?" Rick said. He was watching her intently trying to puzzle out the problem.
"Because Rick since we have started trying to get on the same page, you haven't made any decisions about anything. You keep leaving everything up to me. I want to know what Rick wants. If I didn't want to know I wouldn't ask." She has raised her voice to where she is speaking loud enough the whole bullpen is listening whether they want to or not.
"Kate, I just wanted you to be happy. When I do things that make you happy it makes me happy."
"But, why can't I make you happy too. Why does it always have to be you making me happy?"
He looked at her flabbergasted. Without another word, he grabbed his jacket and left.
She sat back down at her desk. Now what should I do? Apologize? Wait? Chase after him? She couldn't make up her mind what she should do, so she did nothing. She positioned herself back on the edge of her desk and stared at the murder board pretending it might be speaking to her. Deep in her mind she was replaying their conversation and she thought somewhere inside it she might find the key to why he left rather than making a decision. At dinner time she was no closer to an answer than the moment he had left.
She looked at her watch and realized she had been awake for more than 36 hours; and she decided it was time to go home and sleep. She shut down her computer, grabbed her coat and left.
She stopped by the comfort food truck on the way home to grab some mac-n-cheese. She really wasn't in the mood for a real meal, but she had survived on coffee all day. The calories were necessary.
Kate went in to her apartment, tossed her keys, badge, gun and phone on the counter. After eating quickly she showered and went to bed. Tomorrow has to be a better day.
For once her mind didn't dwell on anything; she was asleep in seconds.
