A/N: Story's wrapping up soon. Just one more chapter and the epilogue to follow. Thank you so much for following with me. Your reviews and follows have been fabulous and I'd love to keep hearing from you as the story draws to it's end. Also, I had a question- if there were moments from this story that you maybe wanted Peeta, Prim, Gale, Haymitch, Finnick or anyone else's P.O.V. on, what would they be? Would anybody be interested in that at all? Drop me a comment in a review on here or over at jackingbackpeeta OR notalone91 on tumblr. So, again, forgive the canon deviance. I'm gonna throw out a sexual violence TW here because, in this universe, the fight is over a different drunken antic than race. Basically, I couldn't see it being over a racial slur in this incarnation. Anywho... Happy reading!
Tailgating is supposed to be the quintessential American gathering; alcohol, junk food, forced social interaction, people attacking each other with their entire body weight over a lump of animal skin, and football, too. What's not to love? To be fair, I wasn't judging or anything, I just think it's funny.
As we perused the crowd, looking for our safe haven of familiar faces, Prim checked through the plan with me for the 10th time since we'd gotten out of the car. "Alright, so we're meeting up with Finnick and his boys, right?"
"Yeah," I answered, keeping my eyes forward and one hand on Prim's.
She didn't seem convinced. "Did they say where they were parked?"
"D-13, right by the truck with the three finger salute coming out of the cab," I repeated. That would have been a good way to explain it if the lot was labeled clearly and there weren't similar adornments on one in every 4 vehicles.
Speaking of, as we walked past one such vehicle, this one a converted u-Haul truck, a shirtless man painted in Tributes colors scaled the side of it and began to perform vile acts on the sculpted hand. As he did, the group that came in the truck began rocking it, shaking him down. "Guys are weird," she said, all too calmly.
"Come on, Prim, we'll just have some fun. We don't even have to go in if you don't want. Haymitch won't really know. We'll see how we feel." I fiddled with my pin, fastened on my shirt, and smiled. I really didn't want to be here anyway. I wanted to spend the time with her, but I still felt guilty about Peeta. Peeta. Right. Fuck, I still hadn't called him. As soon as we find Finnick.
Reluctantly, Prim gave a slight nod and said "Alright."
We snaked our way through the crowd and found ourselves face to face with a man, face completely obscured by a painted on Mockingjay. He made an exaggerated cheer of the four note tune used by fans when the team scored a goal. It was only then that I realized that I did recognize him. "Dr. Aurelius?!" I called.
He turned back to face me and it was clear that that's exactly who it was. "Katniss Everdeen!" he called at me in a sing-song voice all it's own, utilizing the cheer tune, pulling me into a tight hug.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, dumbly. I was just shocked. Obviously, he was here for the game.
Before I could amend my question, he answered honestly. "We gotta kick some Tribute ass is what I'm doing here!"
I laughed, looking over at Prim, suitably floored that this man was allowed to practice medicine. "I'm... isn't this illegal? Seeing you outside of sessions?"
"Today, I'm not your therapist," he answered. "Today, we're simply a family under the wings of the birds," he threw his arms around us and called out the familiar four notes again.
Avoiding the slosh of his beer, I asked, "You're a little drunk, aren't you?" I kept my voice playful.
He nodded happily. "A little, a little. I'm happy to see you, though," he clapped me on the shoulder and then gestured to my sister, still frozen under his arm. "Is this the famed Primrose?"
"Yeah, yeah. Prim," I said, calling her to stand next to me, giving her reason to not have him touching her anymore, as she was clearly uncomfortable with, "I want you to meet my therapist, Dr. Aurelius."
"Call me Winston," he slurred.
"Winston? Really?" I laughed. I don't know what I'd imagined his name was but that certainly wasn't it. Winstons sat at home, listening to NPR and drinking a single scotch neat before bed in their Main Line mansion. Winstons definitely didn't drink piss warm Bud straight out of the can with their face painted in an inner city parking lot. Not that I'd spent a lot of time imagining either scenario, but you know what I mean.
"Nice to meet you, Winston," she laughed awkwardly.
I couldn't leave him to wander alone. I shot an apologetic look at Prim, hoping we wouldn't be alone with him long. "So, do you want to tag along with us. We're looking out for my friend..."
"PRIM!" Wish granted.
From behind us, Finnick's voice carried over the crowd and, before I knew it, my sister was running at him, throwing herself into his arms. "FINNICK!"
She adored him. Secretly, I'd always hoped they'd get married, but he was head over heels for Annie before Prim was out of the boys have cooties phase. We crossed over to his group, made the introduction rounds and began to loosen up. When the dancing was brought up, I became a very popular new friend to be made. Someone popped on an old boom box and we were off. I'd have certainly been happy to keep doing this and not go to the game. As I switched partners, I caught glimpse of a shaggy red bob. I made my way over to her and wrapped my arms around her waist.
She turned around quickly and, upon realizing it was me, she threw her arms around my neck. "What're you doing here, brainless? Shouldn't you be trying to nail Peeta? I mean, nail the big move with Peeta?" she asked, never the one to be curt.
"I know, I'm going over after. I have to be here for a little bit. I promised Haymitch." I explained. She shot me a questioning look but let it go. "Look, are you hanging around, I'd love for you to meet everyone."
Time passed and I made my way around to Finnick. I figured, it was getting close to game time, I'd call him now, go in, stick around through the first quarter and blow. In and out, no problem.
Problem. "I actually don't have his number," he said, flicking through his phone.
That was hard to believe. "With how often you guys see each other?"
He shook his head, not knowing what I meant. "I don't see him that often, Katniss. But, look, I'll tell you what. Why don't you call Annie." He handed me his phone, then put his hands up in surrender. "I just, today, I'm not talking to Annie. I'm my own man today." He yelled his last sentence, to my embarrassment, and was met by cheers from the men all around us. Gross, I thought.
"Wait, why don't you wanna talk to Annie?" I asked.
"'Cause she brings me down, Katniss. She brings me down and I'm not gettin' down today." He plopped down on the gate of his truck.
Oh no, not them too. "Look, this has gotta change, man. You're not gonna throw your marriage away on my watch. There's love there. I used to see it. And that beautiful little boy of of yours? Huh?" He shook his head sadly, looking down into his beer. "No, Finnick. I won't allow it. You two have the picture of the perfect life from the outside. You just gotta fix it on the inside. It got broken, but you gotta fix it. Like a doctor." I knew it wasn't really my business, but I couldn't let him go down the path I was. "Give it a little R&R. What I prescribe is some serious TLC for you and Annie." He rolled his eyes, opening his mouth to protest. "No, listen to me! I know what I'm talking about. It can't be awkward anymore. You need to..." Incentive. That's what he needed. I thought about it for a second, and I remembered how upset he was that his two childhood best friends had split up. "Look, do it for me, huh? If you two can't make it work, what hope do I have?"
"You're right." He laughed, wrapping his arm around my neck and kissing the top of my head. "You are hopeless," he mused.
"That's not what I fucking meant and you know it," I hissed, wriggling out from his arms and sitting next to him, landing a soft punch on his arm. "Asshole."
"Lookee here. What's up, gorgeous?" came a stranger's voice. I looked up, and my stomach dropped. He was talking to Prim. The guy was tall and blonde and muscled and circling my sister like she was lunch. He reached out and grabbed her from where she was standing with Johanna and Dr. Aurelius.
"Oh no," I whimpered, grabbing Finnick's wrist and gesturing at the scene with both of our hands, hoping he'd see it the way I did. Prim could be in trouble.
Like her normal, friendly self, she smiled genially. "Nothing much, you?"
"What're you doing here with Grandpa?" he asked, pressing himself against her menacingly. "Why don't you come to a real man, huh? You know I'll make it worth it." He grabbed her jaw and forced a kiss on her.
Then, the mongrel's friends gathered around, watching the show and cheering him on. My superstar little sister, not having any of it, clamped her teeth down on his lip hard. "Piss off," she spat when he recoiled.
"Ooh, this one's got a mouth on her, don't she?" the predator called, pushing her up against the minivan next to them. "Fucking bitch!" Prim scratched and fought. Dr. Aurelius was on his phone, I can only assume with the cops. Johanna was singlehandedly taking on the 3 guys coming in to back up their boy.
I stood up, knowing this was going to get ugly fast. My impulses were always to protect her. Finnick shoved me back. "Katniss, I got it," he said, springing into action. "Get your hands off of her!"
"Katniss, stay back," Prim yelled, locking eyes at me.
Finnick and Johanna fought their way to her, more like a team than I'd expected two strangers to be. "I know, Prim. I won't. I'm not gonna do it," I called, pulling myself up to stand in the bed of the truck.
"I'll fuck you right here and now, you little whore," the guy said, loud enough for me to hear.
"That's enough!" Johanna screamed. Finnick reached the asshole first. He had him by the collar and was starting to pull him off, but he wouldn't let go of her.
"Dude!" he yelled, kicking at Finnick and momentarily stunning him. Johanna helped him back up and they were back at him.
But they weren't fast enough. As soon as Finnick went down, I'd lept to the grown, flying through the crowd and planting myself between them. "Get the fuck off my sister, mother fucker," I growled, throwing my elbow into his stomach with all of my weight. And he stumbled backwards.
"Holy shit," Finnick gasped, catching the guy and quickly locking his arms behind him. A good thought, but that didn't keep him from kicking his long legs up at me. And there was still the problem of his friends, closing in on the group of us.
All hell broke loose. Punches flew everywhere from all sides.
"Katniss, no," Prim whelped from behind me, where I was involved in a scuffle with a guy who tried to pin both of us against the van for his friend to deal with when he broke free of Finnick. Johanna had been restrained by a guy she'd been dancing with. She managed to wriggle free of him and appeared at my side.
With the blood rushing around my body and all of the yelling, it was understandable that none of us heard the sirens. Either that, or they'd already been onsite. Either way, we were fucked. "You're all coming with us," a bulky cop yelled with an air of finality. He must have been yelling a while because by the time he got to me, Finnick, the attacker, and all but one of his friends- the one I'd been going after, were all in handcuffs. I was next. The rest of our group came quietly.
Fuck. We were going to the police station downtown.
Even though I hadn't really been drinking at all, there was no way this was going to look good for someone who was trying to get their shit back together.
Luckily enough for us, we didn't have to spend the night. The other bastards weren't afforded the same luxury. All of our stories lined up and it was clear that our brawl was in defense, if not a bit out of hand. Exiting into the cold night air, we made our way out to the taxi that had been called for us.
Our group piled out of a cab, tentatively taking the steps to our front door. Prim entered first, followed by Dr. Aurelius, then Johanna. Finnick and I brought up the rear. It was much later than we'd anticipated, so I was already feeling bad enough about having blown Peeta off completely. I wasn't exactly ready for this. Finnick clasped my hand tight and released it. It wasn't the first time it'd happened, but this would, with all hope certainly be the last.
No more trouble like this, and certainly not where we come crawling back through this door with our tails tucked between our legs. Besides the decade that had passed, and the fact that my little sister now joined us, there was one thing that made it clear that things would never be the same. Our spouses didn't stand beside us this time, as they'd done the last however many. I guess everyone was right. Trouble did always start with me and Finnick.
The first time we'd gotten in trouble, we were 16. My mom had decided to pop back into town on a lark. She'd needed money and come to see if she could snake some out of her kids. Prim had just had a birthday and mom didn't stop by for that. No, she came to ask her daughter if she'd gotten any money for her birthday. Prim told her she did, but before she could ask for it, I stood up, taking a $20 out of my wallet, dropped it in front of her and told her not to come looking for us again. When I heard the front door click, I knew that was the last time I'd be in the same house as her; likely the last time I'd ever see her. I took my little sister's hand and walked her right up to Haymitch and Effie's room, asking them to make sure she didn't sleep alone tonight, since she was crying. That was the first time I'd ever felt that rage. I didn't want her to see me that way. Annie had made her way into our group for the first time, turning the trio that was me and my boys into a foursome. Despite the fact that Finnick had been mooning over her since she spilled her lunch tray on herself in the sixth grade and called it Splattered Couture, she'd only recently started giving him the time of day. I still wasn't super comfortable with her, but I needed them all tonight. I called Finnick and asked him to swing by and get me, since he was the one with the license. When I explained the situation to him, he asked what I wanted to do. We went and picked up the other two and drove to a little lake up in the mountains where I remembered my dad taking us when we were little. We talked until the sun came up, swam in the lake the next day, shirking our school responsibilities, and came home late the next night. The first stop we made was my place, all four of us walking in together. Finnick took me by the hand and let the other two go in first. We got laid into pretty hard, but ultimately, we'd gotten away pretty light. The biggest thing that Haymitch and Effie asked us to take away from it all was that we should have told them where we were. They also stressed the importance of us going to school, but under the circumstances, they expressed gratitude to the other three for being there for me, still managing to scold Finnick for helping with the transportation.
This instance was a little closer to the second time in execution, if not initial conflict. Same players, fast forward to the summer after high school. We were 18 and all leaving for college in less than a week. We'd each made a basic bucket list of things that were mandatory for the four of us to do together before we went away. Most of them were simple and fun- go to the beach for a whole weekend, go to a concert, spend a whole day doing nothing. Those were the basics, yes, but two stuck out as a little more worrying and harder to come by for 4 teenagers with no experience in obtaining them: get high, get drunk. When Finnick and I saw the last two on each other's short lists, we'd exchanged a ridiculous high five. I stole the booze from our basement. Finnick never did tell me where he got the pot. And we went back to our spot at the lake. Having planned ahead, we'd managed to secure 3 whole days for ourselves. We laughed and drank and had a great time of it, but knowing we only had a little bit of weed, we saved it for the last night, as a go out with a bang type of thing. In the decade since, I've come to look back on this night fondly, even though it's silly how big a deal we made of it, but this was our big rebellion before we made our commitment to our futures. Fondly, I say hesitantly and meaning only before the next bit. Apparently, our noise had gotten carried away at some point, and we'd drawn enough attention to ourselves that police had been sent out to investigate, finding four stoned teenagers laying in the grass staring at the stars, surrounded by empty liquor bottles, sleeping bags, and trash bags, containing food waste and condom trash. They joked about not being invited to our party, but still took us in anyway. Though we didn't get more than a slap on the wrist, when we made the trip back into the house, Finnick held me back again, this time kissing me on the top of the head before clasping my hand. We both knew this was going to be a bigger blow out. There was some screaming and crying, name calling and generally unfair reactions all around. Most vividly, I remember Finnick nearly coming to blows with Haymitch, calling him a hypocrite for the way he spoke to me. We were all wrong, in our own ways, and we knew it then, almost as well as we knew it now.
Even in our past experiences with it, we could never have been prepared for what lay on the other side of the door. We were full fledged adults now. How could it possibly be worse? "What'd you do? What the hell happened?!" Haymitch yelled, blowing past everyone else and coming straight for me.
From where she was seated on the stairs, Effie muttered a careful "Haymitch-" She'd been the one to answer my call, and I made her swear not to tell him exactly what happened. His temper was nearly as bad as mine and I knew that if he'd heard the circumstances, he'd be on the steps of the courthouse to do worse to the guy when he came out those doors. She obliged, knowing deep down that I was right. Still, she didn't like keeping things from her husband, especially things she thought omitting would make worse.
"What the fuck happened?" He asked again, arms framing me against the wall. "I trusted you!" He brought his fists heavy against the wall with a resounding thud. I'd never been terrified of him before, but in this moment, he wasn't himself. I couldn't help but wonder if I looked this terrifying standing over that poor naked woman in the hallway, or even earlier that day with- no, well, he deserved it.
Voice unsteady, I tried to interrupt, "Haymitch, I-"
He leaned up, pacing around the room. "The Birds lose, I lose a fuckin' fortune to Chaff." He gestured at the man sitting smugly at the table. I had to remind myself not to wipe that cocky ass grin off his face later. "What the fuck did you do? I thought you said you had it together. You were solid. You lost it!"
I squeaked a little, not sounding very convincing. "I am solid! Haymitch, they were trying to-"
"You fell apart. What are you talking about, solid." He made a frustrated hand gesture at me, but if there was any significance to it, it was lost on me.
As he sat in one of the chairs at the table next to Chaff, Dr. Aurelius interjected. "Mr. Abernathy, if I may, Katniss was trying to protect-"
But Haymitch was having none of it. "It's all fucking ruined now. It's over and I'll never get that money back." He looked at me like it was all my fault.
That was the part that hurt worse than any of the bruises developing all over my aching body. "Haymitch, will you listen for a god damned second so we can explain?" I yelled, gesturing at Finnick, Prim and myself. I'd have included the two members of our group sitting at the table, but he didn't know Johanna or Dr. Aurelius, so I doubted very much that they'd be able to help.
"Come on, Haymitch. Listen to the girls," Effie plead.
He looked back at her, startled. "What could they possibly have to say to me?" He turned back to face me, clearly the 'they' was just customary. He wanted to hear it from me.
I exhaled, bringing my hands up to wipe my face before I started. "The guys we fought were harassing and threatening Prim."
"They what?" Haymitch asked, looking as though one of those elbow jabs had just landed on his diaphragm.
"You heard me," I said, crossing my arms. "They had her pinned against a van. One at first, but by the time we got him off of her, there were a whole bunch more. We got them off and kept them away from her."
"Haymitch, I swear," Primrose spoke sweetly, crossing to him. "Katniss was the last one to jump in. It looked like it hurt her more to stay away. We tried to keep her out of it. We all did." She made a sweeping gesture around the room. "I mean, hell, this guy's her therapist."
"It's true, sir," Dr. Aurelius confirmed, though at the time, I was pretty sure that'd not be the case anymore soon enough.
Finnick stepped toward Haymitch calmly, all traces of the boy I'd been in trouble with before so many times before gone, "She didn't do anything wrong-" He looked at me with a smile. "She certainly didn't do anything we're not all accountable for and, if I may, she didn't do anything that- and I think I speak for all involved when I say this- that we wouldn't all do again if it came down to it." There were varied tones of agreement, most notably a 'Fuckin' 'A right.' from Johanna.
Just as everything began to calm down, the front door opened and slammed.
"So, who the fuck is this now? Who is this?" Haymitch asked, turning to find Peeta plowing toward me.
I wilted. I should have known this was coming. My mouth opened to speak, but instead, he began, "We need to talk. Right now! When you make a promise to someone, you know it's not fucking cool to just not show up." He took another step closer, eyes flitting between my own and my split lip. "You said you were gonna be late. I figured on as much. That's fine. I mean, it's not fine, but I could have lived with that, but to not fucking show up? That's not cool, Katniss."
"Wait a minute, Peeta!" I cried out, defending myself. "I tried to call you, but you know I don't have a phone of my own. I tried, but Finnick and Prim didn't have your numbers. I was gonna call Annie but then everything-" I made a spiral motion with my hand and then gestured around me.
Haymitch was fuming. "Who is this? What the hell is he talking about?"
If he heard Haymitch, he certainly didn't show it. "Oh, really? You tried? Tried isn't good enough here, Katniss!" he yelled, pounding his fist against the wooden chair.
"I'M SORRY!" I screamed. "Look, everything got fucked up today and I'm sorry! I fucked everything up for everyone and I get that. But, I told you I was going to split the time. But, at the game- we, Dr. Aurelius, Finnick, Prim and me- we..." I gestured around a little tentatively, not knowing how to explain it.
"Well, that's nice for them," he said, cutting me off. "But what about me? Huh? They didn't all make a promise to me in return for my help." Them. Right, other people. In the room. He looked around and took in the people staring at him. "I'm Peeta, by the way," he added briefly.
"What is the deal with this Peeta Mellark business?" Haymitch asked, raising his beer to his lips.
"There's... Haymitch, I told you what this was," I groaned. I was pretty sure he didn't ever listen to me. "We talked about it. Numerous times, we talked about it."
He wasn't happy with that answer. "He's nuts. When you started spending time with him, it all fell apart." He pointed at Peeta accusingly. "This is the fucking reason right here." Finnick and I started to protest, but we didn't get the chance. Peeta was more than capable of defending himself.
Apparently, he came in with a plan.
In mock surprise, Peeta gasped. "You think I fucked up the Mockingjays' juju?" He smiled wickedly, turning to face Haymitch and only Haymitch. A few of us, knowing both of their tempers, exchanged worried glances. Only Johanna remained unworried. Truth be told, she was actually eyeing Peeta hungrily. But he didn't seem to notice. "You do, don't you? You think I'm why today happened?
"Yes, that sounds right," Haymitch nodded.
Needing to hear it one more time, he asked again, "I'm the reason?"
Growing tired of the conversation, and trying to make his word the final one, he growled, "I think so, yeah."
There was that wicked smile again. "Let's talk about that." His eyes flicked dangerously around the room. "Finnick, what was the score of the game the night we had dinner at your house?" He responded with a confused stare. "No? No idea?" He looked up at me. When I didn't have an answer, he turned back to Haymitch. "The Mockingjays beat the Miners 40-26. No sweat. The next time we went for a run, the Seam City Rebels beat the Eights 7-5 for the NLCS in the baseball game."
"That's true," Finnick said, apparently remembering the numbers.
"The next time we went for a run, the Mockingjays whipped the Presidents 27-14." He counted off on his fingers. "The next time we saw each other, we went to the diner and the Rebels dominated the Muttations in the fourth game of the world series."
"The 10-2 game?" Dr. Aurelius asked, incredulously.
"The 10-2 game." I confirmed behind him.
He let out a hiss that sounded an awful lot like a drawn out "Shit." And 'Shit' was right. Every time Peeta and I had been together, every Seam City team had done well. Why hadn't I thought about that?
"Let me think about this for a minute," Haymitch said, pacing around.
Peeta wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of thinking on it for a minute. If he did, he might decide to argue. Luckily, there was more. "Well, while you're at it there, sir, why don't you think about when the Mockingjays beat the Fishermen 14-7."
Haymitch looked at him expectantly. "She was with you?"
"She was with me," he said, backing up to me.
Next to me, Finnick queried, "Really? That's nuts. You guys see each other that often? And you're not sleeping together."
I shot him a glare, accompanied by an icy, "Finnick..." and he shut up.
"Since Katniss and I have been working together every day, there have been no games." Again, this was true. For someone who hated football, he sure followed it well. "Had she been at the gallery with me, where she was supposed to be today, she wouldn't have gotten in a fight, she wouldn't be in trouble, and maybe, just maybe, the Mockingjays would have beat the fucking Colorado Tributes." Secretly, I resented the fact that they were arguing about me like I was some token, but I guessed it didn't really matter. They both deserved to be angry. Sure, Haymitch didn't exactly have the right to be angry with me specifically, but he deserved to be angry.
"He's making a lot of sense, Haymitch. That is right," Prim said quietly from the stairs, checking through the stack of newspaper clippings Haymitch had left. She didn't follow sports, so she couldn't pull up the numbers like we could. Plus, having not been here, she wasn't aware of any of the dates.
A few moments of silence passed, and Peeta spoke again. "Just on the off chance, do any of you happen to know what the unofficial motto of the state of Colorado is?" He looked around, focusing in on me briefly before looking at others. "It's on their seal. On their flag? Anyone? How about you Haymitch?" Getting no response, he turned back to me, making a grand, sweeping gesture akin to that of an orchestra conductor. "'Panem et Circenses.' Look it up."
"Katniss," Effie cooed from where she and Prim were seated. She could see the distress on my face. Immediately, I internalized it. This couldn't be my fault, could it?
"Not that I give a flying fuck about football or your weird ass superstitions," Peeta continued, "but if it's me reading the signs, I don't send the Mockingjay whose mantra is Panem et Circenses to a fucking Tributes game. Especially when she's already got enough on her plate." He walked over to the table and sat down next to Johanna.
"Jesus," she said, taking him in.
I asked the burning question on everyone's mind. "How did you know all of that?"
He reached into the center of the table and popped open a beer. "I did my research." He took a swig and drummed his fingers against the neck.
The room fell into expectant silence. All eyes were on Haymitch, except Peeta's and mine, locked only on each other. I was terrified that he would hate me, but the more he looked at me, focusing in on each scrape and bruise, his gaze softened. I wanted so desperately to apologize, to get him alone and explain everything, but I knew it would have to wait. "Well, I have to say, I'm impressed. I didn't trust you before, but you've certainly convinced me."
I was shocked. "Oh, now you're cool with him?" I'd only spent the last couple of weeks trying to tell him, but as usual, my word wasn't good enough.
"Yeah. I think so," he nodded, disinterested in my query.
Chaff, stood up, crossing to the man. "Look, Haymitch, I feel terrible, you know. I won a lot of money in a bet from you and now look what happened. Your whole world's turned upside down."
Peeta rolled his eyes, buying it as little as Haymitch and I did. "Oh, go to hell Chaff. You fucking live for this shit. You've been betting against my father for years and I've got scars from my mother to prove it." He didn't get up. He didn't really even change his expression, but I could tell he wasn't lying.
"Scars?" I asked, getting no response. "Peeta?"
He shook his head, standing up to face him. "You're twisting the knife right now. You get off on this sort of shit!" Clearly, his presence was irritating enough to Peeta.
"You're out of your depth here, kiddo. You have no idea what you're talking about." He responded threateningly, taking a few steps to Peeta. "Don't you dare say that kind of shit about me."
"You get off on it!" he said, enunciating each of his words deliberately. "If not, prove it! Give him the chance to win it all back, double or nothing." He gave a smug smile and walked in a tight circle.
"No. No no nonononononono. Peeta, no," I begged, rushing to his side.
Chaff opened his arms in a wide 'so what' gesture. "Double or nothing on the Luxurites next week? Is that what you're saying?" he asked, nonplussed.
Peeta merely shook his head, taking a deep swig of his beer.
"Then what? What are you suggesting, boy-o?" he asked.
"Against the Peacekeepers." The entire room gasped. Well, there was no denying it now- Peeta certainly had brass ones. The Peacekeepers were the Mockingjays' biggest rival. Their biggest local supporter that we knew? Chaff. "That's your team, isn't it?"
"That's exactly who his team is and we all know it," I said.
Peeta smiled at me, snaking his arm around my shoulder and leaning on me. "I know." I knew it was bravado, but the fact was that I was really grateful for it. Even if he was still mad at me, he wasn't going to be gone. I laced my fingers with his, presenting us as a united front.
"When?" Chaff asked, as though that made a difference.
"December 28," he answered. "Last game of the regular season. Same day as the dance competition Katniss and I have been working toward; the Flickerman Freestyle Footlight Foray." He cringed a little at the ridiculous title.
"Oh my god," I said, looking at him out of the corner of my eye. If he was right about the earlier events, and there was any credit to our being together for the games, there was a chance that this could work. I could have kissed him. Still, this wasn't a good idea and my morale fell, repeating "Oh my god."
Chaff fell silent, weighing the odds in his head. Unhappy with the wait, Haymitch prodded, "Oh, come on Chaff, I thought they were your boys."
"Don't you believe in them, Chaff?" I said innocently, batting my eyes.
He stepped toward us and said "Yeah, I believe in them, but if I win, you're out of action." He turned to Haymitch. "No bar, no nothing. Do you think I'm the kind of prick that could live with myself like that?"
"Yeah. I do," Haymitch said flatly. "I like it. The odds are in my favor here," he said, gesturing at the pair of us. I dropped my hand away and stepped over to lean on the table.
"No. Haymitch, no." Effie was right. This was bad. What if it didn't work?
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Prim stepped down off the stairs and lined herself up in front of Haymitch. "I don't think this is the best way-"
"I believe in the birds and more so, I'm betting on her." He pointed at me. "I believe in Katniss. I'll take the action." He proffered a hand to Chaff.
"Haymitch-" I said with a warning tone, voice bordering on a yell.
He seemed unmoved. "I have faith."
"I know, but listen to me," I mused, walking toward him, putting myself between the two older men. "This is toxic. I really-"
"What do you say, Chaff?" He asked over me, pushing me aside, adding "Shut up a minute, you already did enough." I stumbled back into Prim, who wrapped her arms around me as if it had all been planned. "What do you say? My birds... favored by what is it, a point and a half?"
This was enough. "Haymitch, stop it."
"I'll give you 3 more," he said, ignoring the protest.
"Haymitch, no," Finnick said, groaning at the mere idea of this bet. It was ludicrous.
Abandoning the task of swaying Haymitch, I turned my efforts elsewhere. "Chaff, I'm begging you, please don't take this bet."
Adding to his trouble, he thought for a second before concluding. "Fuck it, I'll give you ten. Ten points." Johanna and Dr. Aurelius, who'd both been uncharacteristically silent up until now began chatting at each other about how bad this really was.
"Haymitch," Effie warned.
Peeta crossed his arms and nodded. Haymitch seemed to take this as a good sign. "You have to take that bet."
"Would you stop him, Effie?" Chaff said, not sure how to handle this. "Take him up to bed before he hurts himself."
"Jesus!" I hissed at him as Effie began to maneuver her way to Haymitch, tugging at his shirt sleeve.
Still, he protested, as we all knew he would. "I'm not going anywhere, damn it. How could you not take that bet?" He stood his ground, gesturing to Peeta. "Even with the ten points, that's an insane spread to your advantage. Peacekeepers are puppets. I've been telling you that for years. And you're so tangled in the strings, you won't take the 10." He directed his attention back to Chaff. "Plus, are you listening to me? Plus whatever their score is at the dance thing. What's the deal there?"
Enough was enough. "Haymitch, absolutely not. I can't let you do this." I stepped to him, but rethought it turning back to look at Peeta. Even he seemed wary of this new development. That was all I needed to know I was right. This was a really fucking stupid idea.
Even Chaff agreed. "No, you're too drunk and emotional right now. I won't take the points," he paused, "though I do like the sound of a parlay. You might be on to something there."
"No. No parlay, no," Effie said, tugging at her husband.
"Don't do it. Haymitch," I said, throwing my hands in the air. "I'm begging you here. Don't do this."
Chaff was unmoved by my statement. He spoke to me deliberately, trying to get my attention away from Haymitch. "Katniss, how do they run this dance competition? Is it scores, votes, percentages, timed? What?"
"I don't know," I shrieked, looking fast between the two older men and Peeta. "I don't fucking know. We're just participants, Chaff. We're not a part of the rules. This is a high profile thing. These are real dancers. Don't do this. This isn't fair." I crossed to Peeta, who returned his arm to my shoulders, this time comfortingly.
"They go by the Seam City rules," he answered, voice even. "Each pair of dancers is scored on a scale of one to ten, ten being the highest. You have to average the four judges' scores."
"So, one to ten," he nodded, expression saying 'simple enough,' "And you guys are how good?"
"We suck," I said. It was true, and mostly thanks to me.
Peeta shot me an incredulous look. "We do not. Katniss is a beginner," he said, resting his palm on my chest. "I'm okay. We're lucky to even be going."
Needing all the information, Chaff asked, "And the others?"
"Good," Peeta said in earnest. "Professionals, some."
He nodded. "So, better than you?" His tone wasn't mocking or down-grading. He was merely asking.
Peeta made a noncommittal shrug and I nodded, eyes wide. "A lot better." I wasn't going to lie to him.
"So, if you only have to score a five, I would be really very generous, right?" he asked.
"That would..." I stammered, thinking about it. A five. 50%. "I'd be floored, to be honest. That would be amazing. Let's not get carried away..." I didn't mean to sound skeptical, but it was true. If there were professional dancers...
"Shut up," Peeta said, furrowing his brow when he turned to me. "We can get a five. Gimme a break."
"We cannot get a five," I urged. I'd missed today's practice. We still hadn't nailed the big move. We still had almost a minute to choreograph. There was no way in hell.
Haymitch sighed, "Give them five."
"We can do a five," Peeta confirmed.
"What are you talking about?" I asked Haymitch. "You've never seen us dance! How could you possibly say that? And you," I turned to Peeta, backing away tentatively. I was a little scared of how quickly he found himself supporting this ridiculous addition. "You know as well as I do..." but my words were irrelevant.
"So that's it. That's the parlay." Haymitch said, offering his hand to Chaff again.
"Can someone please explain the point of a parlay to me?" Johanna asked.
Finnick leaned forward so he could see her properly from the living room. "You have to win both bets or you lose it all. For Haymitch to win, the Mockingjays have to beat the Peacekeepers and Katniss and Peeta have to score a five at this dance thing."
Dr. Aurelius nodded. "That is very, very manic indeed."
"That's the parlay," Prim groaned.
"Shake on it," Haymitch prompted. Chaff obliged.
I'd been trying so hard to distance myself from this kind of behavior for the benefit of everyone I loved, I didn't stop to think about what it actually felt like from the outside. I couldn't let this happen. I couldn't be at the center. This was going to be the end of it. "I'm not gonna be a part of this. Chaff, you're a sick, sick man. And it's contagious. You're a fucking disease and I won't be a part of it. I'm out. Guys, I'm done." I headed for the door.
Peeta reached out for me, trying to get me to stop. "Katniss, you can't quit."
"I'm not doing the fucking dance. If I don't do it, they can't make this stupid fucking bet. I'm done," I told him. It had nothing to do with him, it really didn't, but I couldn't be a party to this. I couldn't handle being a part of the reason Haymitch lost everything.
"Katniss, calm down," he plead, seeing the panic in my eyes and grabbing my hands.
"No," I roared. He stepped back, shocked. Tears welling in my eyes, I turned away. "I'll see you around." I hoped that was true.
"Katniss, no." Prim said. Normally, her voice would have broken me out of it, but I was determined.
Effie chimed in, "Where are you going?" Of course, she knew I wouldn't answer.
"Katniss..." Gale called after me. I merely waved him off.
Johanna got up to follow me, but she didn't have the chance. "There we go again, sweetheart," called Haymitch. He was taunting me. "Giving up when victory is within your grasp. You can almost taste it and you're gonna let it go."
It didn't make sense. That was in no way what I did. "What does that even mean, Haymitch? This," I emphasized, waving between him and Chaff, "has nothing to do with me. This is all you and I'm not going to enable this sort of shit anymore. I'm not gonna do it. I'm sorry, but you can't make me." I sounded like a petulant child, I'm sure, but I needed to get it through to him that I wasn't here for this.
"Look, this is not you." Peeta said, stepping toward me. Johanna shook her head at him and grabbed his wrist, retaining him from getting closer. He faltered a little, but didn't give up. "This is not the honest, determined person you've become and, if it's me reading the signs-"
"Oh, if it's you reading the signs?" I yelled, in mock clarity. "You're reading the signs? You're just as bad as they are, Peeta." I didn't mean that. Sure, he was fanning the flames, but this wasn't his fault. He just, apparently, didn't get the gravity of the situation. But I wasn't going to be the one to explain it to him. I'm sure he would have understood, but I just couldn't do it.
I walked out the door, letting it slam behind me. I hesitated on the porch to regain my bearings.
"Katniss!" came Effie's voice.
"You can't do this, Katniss!," yelled Peeta. "You can't walk away like this."
Haymitch was the only one who sounded mad. "Katniss, come back here!"
Headed out into the night, I went for the first place I thought of. The park. One thing Peeta said kept ringing in my mind. 'But if it's me reading the signs...' Where had I heard that before? '...reading the signs...' I repeated over and over and over, and then it hit me. The letter. The letter wasn't from Gale at all. It was Peeta. It had been Peeta all long. Everything fell into place. Finnick's comment about not seeing him all that often. Why it came when I needed it most. The way that it said absolutely nothing specific, but just enough to inspire me to make a decision. I sat down on the curb. What did it mean? Had he given the letter to Gale at all? Did it really matter? There was nothing he could have said at that point that would have elicited a different reaction. It was over between me and Gale. I supposed that I'd known it all along, but I just needed the suggestion. I smiled a little, comfortable with the realization. It almost seemed too clear that it was Peeta that I really wanted. But why would he lie to me about it? What did he really stand to gain from it? Suddenly, I remembered his mention of scars from his mother and I thought about another instance of a mother acting like that. And a little boy with bright blue eyes. And the two coins in the bottom of the coffee can. Peeta. The silvery painting. Of course! It was so obvious. He was trying to tell me that he remembered. He had to have been. Maybe he didn't know it was me. No, he had to. He was the one that saved me. Even after all these years, he was doing the same. I had to pay him back.
I knew exactly what to do.
